Hayzed 'n' Confuzed (Rock Star Romance): Novella

by K. M. Raya

  “Then why are you still here talking to my ugly ass?” Max asked as he picked his phone back up and slugged back the rest of his beer.

  Soren hopped up from the table, grabbed his acoustic guitar from beside the couch and dashed outside. The sun was already setting, and everyone was beginning to settle in for the night. She had left his bed hours ago but somehow, he knew exactly where she’d be.

  He entered the dark theatre past the lobby where he had held her as she cried. He could hear music flowing through the open space and followed it to the source. Lilith sat at a grand piano in the center of the audience, her fingers were gliding over the keys but her eyes were closed tight. The song she played wasn’t one he was familiar with. He figured it must be something she'd written herself. It was beautiful and dark.

  She sat there at the bench wearing an old faded t shirt and jeans but had taken her shoes off and set them aside. She looked so utterly at home in the old historical building and yet so casual. Her dark hair glimmered underneath the low lighting and he could only describe her as some sort of dark angel. His pixie girl was radiant, even through the sadness that hovered over her like a raincloud.

  He purposefully made his footsteps loud and obvious so that he wouldn’t startle her. He watched her shoulders tense for a moment before falling back casually. To his surprise, she scooted over ever so slightly, giving him plenty of room to sit beside her. This was a good sign.

  “I didn’t know you played piano too,” he whispered. He didn’t know why he was whispering. Maybe out of respect for the space.

  Her eyes were sad and he could see the redness in them, telling him that she'd been crying some more. His chest squeezed at her pain.

  “I haven’t played in a long time. Not since Rose…” She let it drift off.

  Soren nodded in understanding. “Look… I’m sorry for being an ass, Lil.” He placed a hand on her arm and she stilled beneath it but didn’t pull away.

  “I saw you with him and I just assumed…” he began and she cut her dark eyes to his.

  “I know what you assumed—and you’d be right,” she told him and he recoiled. What the hell?

  She continued before he could ask. “Not in the way you think though. Alex is messed up right now. Losing Rose messed him up.”

  “What does that have to do with you?”

  “He kissed me today. Right here where we're sitting.” She smiled bitterly, and Soren tried to push away the violent pangs hammering at his heart.

  “It was a mistake, I know that… but it changed things. I pushed him away because he’s like a brother to me. But I think he’s going to beat himself up over it for a while.”

  Soren was still confused. Why would Alex kiss her if he was still grieving Rose? He voiced his confusion.

  She looked at him face-on now, her eyes twinkling with unshed tears.

  “We were identical, Soren. Imagine losing the one person in the world who you loved with your whole heart, and then having to look at a mirror image of them day after day.”

  He remembered the photos from his little stalking adventure. They had indeed been identical in every way. Thinking about it now, he couldn’t imagine how difficult it must be for Alex. He felt sick about it.

  “I’m so sorry," he whispered as he scooted in closer. “I can’t begin to imagine what you're going through, but I want you to know that I’m here for you—whatever you need me to be, I’ll be here,” he promised her, and he knew in his heart he was telling the truth. He’d be whatever she asked of him.

  “Why do you care so much?”

  He smiled as he took her hand from the keys where they had paused. “I’m gonna be honest with you…the moment I saw you—I think I fell in love a little bit,” he admitted, shocking even himself. “I think I both hated and loved you actually.”

  She shook her head with a small smile that made his heart race. “Impossible. You can't love someone at first sight, Soren. I know we sing about shit like that, but it’s not real,” she tried to tell him but he disagreed completely.

  “I know what I felt… what I feel now and let me tell you, I’ve never known anything like it. I’ve never met anybody as incredible as you... Never.” He reached up to run his fingers back though that silky hair he loved so much. He loved everything about her, he realized. Her smile, her laugh, her voice…everything.

  Everything about Lilith Hayze drove him crazy. He knew she wasn’t just a lust induced infatuation. He'd been with countless women over the years and he knew what lust was. He could have tried to forget her. He could have forced himself to move onto the next chick who threw herself at him after every show, but it had been weeks since another woman had even held his attention for more than a passing hello. When he listened to the lyrics Lilith wrote, and when he watched her perform, it showed him a side of her that he knew she liked to keep hidden. He knew the words came straight from inside of her and it made everything about her all the more beautiful. She loved her friends, had adored her sister with everything she had, and he could see the devotion they returned. She was everything he ever wanted in a woman and he knew he would never fully deserve her.

  “When I first saw you on that stage, it was like you hypnotized me. I couldn’t keep my eyes off of you and haven’t been able to ever since. I may be a grade A jerk ninety five percent of the time, but I would never lie to you. I loved you from the start, and if you let me, I’d like to try and convince to love me back.”

  She looked at him then, closer even than all the times before. Leaning in, she wrapped her lips around his. This wasn’t a fast and aggressive, passion filled moment in some club bathroom. This wasn’t a hate filled kiss in an alleyway. This was two people seeing each other clearly for the first time.

  He let out a sigh of appreciation as he pulled her in closer. She kissed him softly at first, testing him, teasing him before opening up and devouring him completely. Her hands gripped his short hair and his tangled in her long dark waves. She moaned beneath him and it only spurred him on. Shifting, he wrapped one leg over the piano bench and without a word, Lilith straddled his hips. She used one arm to brace herself as she moved, causing a sudden blast of sound from the keys she pressed on. They ignored it—too caught up in everything they had ever wanted.

  Her lips felt like they were made for his and her body beneath his hands felt like home. Her jasmine scent surrounded him and he knew that he would never get enough of this woman. A haze of lust and equal amounts of love surrounded them. She ground herself against him causing a rush of pleasure to spread over his body and sent chills over his skin. Her touch was magic and he wanted to revel in it.

  In just moments their shirts were in a pile on the floor and their breaths were coming faster. The room was cold, but the heat from their bodies was plenty. She wore a simple black lace bralette that showed off her tattoos amazingly. He made a point to kiss each one individually as he explored every part of her. Part of him knew that they should probably move this to a more private area. Anyone could walk in on them, from roadies to the media they were exposed but he just didn’t care. With her hands on him and her soft sighs reverberating off of the walls, it was the most content he had ever been.

  He made love to her there on that grand piano. She leaned backwards as he thrust into her from below—groaning deeply as he hit her just right. She moaned and wiggled, making him see stars. They moved together so fluidly and every single partner that came before her paled in comparison—disappeared entirely. Every time she cried out his name she pushed him closer to the edge. His heart was beating wildly and he swore that this was just one of many amazing nights to come. He picked up his pace, thrusting faster and harder, ignoring the sounds of the piano keys as her body smacked into them. Their skin was covered in sweat as he kissed her all over. Her fingers scratched down his back—marking him deeply and making him growl like an animal. She screamed into his shoulder as his final thrust hit deep. He groaned as he finished inside of her, reveling in the feel of her hot breath wash
ing over his lips as she kissed him again.

  When it was all over and they lay there, chests heaving on the piano bench, he found himself nervously checking for any sign that she regretted what they had just done. He found nothing but bliss on her beautiful face as she cuddled there against his chest. Her skin was cooling off now as their sweaty bodies were exposed to the crisp air of the huge theatre.

  Soon, she pushed off of him and stood to pull her clothes back on. His stomach was a mess of nerves and he felt the beginnings of panic well up inside him. He wasn’t ready to let this go. He wasn’t prepared for her to tell him it had been fun and then walk away like his life hadn’t just fundamentally changed for the better. He fought the urge reach out to her. She was quiet, and it was making him nervous.

  This was new territory for him and he didn’t know how to act. He hurried through the motions of pulling his shirt over his head and stepping into his jeans. She was quiet still. He expected her to make her excuses before a quick getaway, but she surprised him yet again. She sat back down at the piano and waited for him patiently. He stood there like an idiot for a moment before finally joining her.

  “Wanna play?” she asked him, and a smile bloomed on his face.

  “Hell yeah,” he said as he lifted his guitar up and over his head. “What are we playing?”

  “I’ve had something in the works for a few weeks now. It's still pretty rough, but I was thinking… wouldn’t it be kind of cool of we were to do a mashup?” she asked him. He could tell that she was nervous about asking him this. She didn’t meet his eyes, she only fiddled with the keys in front of her.

  Warmth bloomed in his chest. “Are you kidding? I’d love that, and I have a feeling our fans would too.”

  She smiled at him and once again he could feel the familiar ache in his chest. This time it was a good ache. His heart felt so full, as if it would burst at any moment. All the shit they've been through led up to this moment. The moment he saw love bloom in those pretty brown eyes of hers. It was there—a small ember, but he'd stoke that flame until his last day.

  “Okay, well remember—its rough, but just play along however you can, and we can go from there…” she instructed.

  He simply nodded his head and waited. Moments later, her fingers drifted over the keys and he heard an unfamiliar tune. As she played, his fingers itched to strum along, and eventually he gave in. They played alongside one another in perfect harmony for hours.

  Soon, her deep, melodic voice joined in and he knew they'd struck something like gold.

  Epilogue

  One year Later : Lilith

  The weeks following their last performance were a whirlwind. Everyone was set to go their separate ways and it was bittersweet. Lilith felt genuinely sad that their life on the road was coming to an end, but she felt even more excitement for the things to come. Life with Soren had been amazing. After their night in the theatre, they'd stuck together like glue for the remainder of the tour. Their friends had been thrilled to finally be rid of the needless tension that built up over the course of those few first weeks and happily gave their blessing.

  They were taking things slowly for now—her heart was still raw, but Soren was there at every turn to soothe away the ache. They spent their days in bliss, dodging the paparazzi and stealing away moments for themselves in between shows. When the tour eventually came to a close, Soren asked Lilith to spend a summer with him at his house in Miami to which she agreed. She was excited to see what their life could be like together outside of the tour.

  Telling her friends was hard as they had not been apart for any amount of time since Rose’s passing but something told her a little space would do them some good. Alex especially. They managed to patch things up slowly over the weeks that followed that kiss. Alex apologized until he was blue in the face while Lilith constantly reassured him that everything was forgiven. Soren still had reservations about Alex, but Lilith did her best to keep the peace. She wanted to maintain her lifelong friendships while still working hard every day to cultivate a relationship with the man of her dreams.

  The fans lost their collective minds when their relationship made headlines after Soren announced it on stage without warning her.

  She remembered hearing her name over the speakers as she stood on the side stage with her band after one of their last performances in Canada. She thought she was hearing things until suddenly, the crazy brooding guitarist of Serenity Rising was suddenly walking towards her in the middle of his set. She remembered the crowd going ballistic as he dragged her out on stage with him, handing her a mic stand. Her tech, Jared, surprised her next as the camo wearing man snuck on stage and placed Rose’s keyboard in front of her.

  Her throat had closed up at the sight of the old instrument, plugged in and lit up for her to play. She panicked for only a moment before a gentle hand caressed her face. She looked up into Soren’s chocolate brown eyes and all of her fear and hesitation fled her body.

  He turned back to the crowd and Angel moved out of his way with a smirk plastered across his ridiculous face. Lilith rolled her eyes at the crazy front man, knowing that he had been both aware and supportive of whatever shenanigans Soren was up to now.

  “We have a little something special for you tonight!” Soren called out to the crowd. His smokey voice caused a ripple of excitement to wash over the sea of people and girls in the front row lost their minds, yelling at the top of their lungs, reaching out to her man.

  “I’d like to welcome someone back to the stage for a little duet if that’s okay with you guys!” he shouted, and the volume rose as the people cheered them on. They probably had no idea what he was talking about, but it was Soren James so they cheered regardless.

  Soren continued speaking to the audience, but his eyes were locked with hers and she couldn’t look away even if she wanted to.

  “This song is pretty fucking special to me you guys, and I can’t think of anyone better to debut it with than the amazingly talented woman who wrote it—my beautiful girlfriend, Lilith Hayze everyone!”

  The spotlight hit her and she felt herself snap back into her rockstar persona. She smiled at the crowd and waved at them, all the while trying to fight back the tears that welled up in her eyes. She knew what he was doing and she couldn’t believe how incredibly sweet it was. They'd spent the past several months writing and recording in secret. They hadn’t told their bands yet, nor had they told the label what they were up to.

  Soren gazed at her with nothing but absolute love and complete adoration as the lights went low and the crowd fell silent for the first time that night. Her heart swelled in her chest and as she touched her fingers to her twin's keyboard for the first time in over two years. She could almost feel Rose there with her on that stage.

  “You can catch this song on our upcoming EP, dropping this summer!”

  “Anyways…this is Rose Colored Glasses!”

  The End