Compromising Positions (Invested in Love)

by Bayley-Burke, Jenna

  She huffed a white cloud into the air. It was ridiculous to be looking for answers here. She opened her eyes and blinked away the tears until she could see clearly again. Her heart stalled as she recognized him, so far away he was merely a figure atop a hill. She knew it was David as surely as she knew she should go. She’d ended it, she’d decided it was too much and walked away. But as she watched him drop to his knees, her legs had a mind of their own. She’d handle the rejection somehow. She needed to get to him, just in case he needed her.

  Her eyes never left him as she made the hike. It was barely eight in the morning; her footsteps were the only sound. He didn’t turn as she neared him, but stayed on his knees rocking slightly. She carefully stepped closer, until she read the headstone in front of him. Natalie Davidson Strong. Her gaze snagged on the date. Today. Kinsey’s birthday. David’s birthday.

  He didn’t move as she stepped closer, didn’t flinch when she laid her hand on his shoulder. “David?”

  His hand covered hers. “Are you real?”

  She pinched his earlobe with her other hand. He laughed, pulling that hand forward and kissing it. Looking down, she realized he was kneeling on one of the yoga mats she sat on so she could see when she drove the truck.

  “Did my dad tell you where to find me?”

  “No, I came to congratulate my folks. They’re grandparents today.”

  He nodded his head slowly as he tightened his grip on her hand.

  “You’re officially mid-thirties now.”

  How did she know not to say happy birthday? “I’ve missed you.”

  “You saw me two days ago.”

  It felt like years had passed since that morning at the doctor’s office. “I’m not doing it. You were right, I changed my mind. You changed it.”

  She stepped closer, so close he could press his head back against her stomach and feel the buttons on her long wool coat.

  “That wasn’t why I was upset. I should go.”

  He tightened his grip on her hand. He wouldn’t let her go this time. “Just listen and let me try and explain. It feels like you are always with me, like what would make me happy would make you happy, so I never think to ask. It’s hard for me to think of you as separate from me. But I promise I’ll try.

  “From that first night we spent together, I changed. I became the man you wanted me to be, and I’m still getting used to the feeling. It scares me to trust you, because when I trust people, they disappoint me. My father has a real knack for it.”

  “He does mean well, David. He’s just twisted in the way he goes about it.”

  “I know, and this isn’t about him. Remember that night in your bed when you said we matched? You were right. You can feel it when I need you, like at the clinic, and today, and I can feel it when you’re hurt or happy. We can’t let that get away.”

  “David.” She cried in that silent way she had, so he pulled her arms tighter around him.

  “Have you decided anything yet?”

  He felt her struggle to control her breathing. “You can have the club.”

  “You know that’s not what I meant.”

  “I want my truck back.”

  Laughing, he let one hand go so she could wipe her eyes. He took the glove off the hand he had left and splayed her fingers between his. Even with her fingers stretched out, her hands were smaller than his palms. He’d wondered about that.

  “Don’t laugh. There’s no point in you selling it to a stranger when I’m just going to turn around and buy the same thing again. I like the car, you did a great job picking it out. But I want to pay for it.”

  “It’s in the south parking lot. You want it now?”

  “Why are you driving it?”

  “The Corvette is my mother’s. I never drive it today. When women I love leave me, they seem to leave their car, too. It’s very bizarre.”

  She must not have heard him.

  “Your mom’s maiden name was Davidson. Is that where they got your name?”

  “We don’t know my name.” He took a deep breath and reveled in how easily the words came. He’d never talked about it, never explained, not even to his father when he pressed, or to the shrink as a kid. “She wanted it to be a surprise. Dad looked everywhere to see if she wrote it down, but he never found it. Davidson was all he could think of.”

  She hugged him close, which wasn’t why he’d told her, but he liked it anyway. Liked it so much that he held her tight as she tried to pull away. “I won’t let you go.”

  “I won’t let you treat me like I don’t matter.”

  “Good.” He pulled her around in front of him. “Teach me. Teach me to love you like you deserve to be loved.”

  Her mouth twisted up as he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close, pressing his head against her chest until he could hear the pounding of her heart.

  “I have to go.”

  “No, not yet.” He couldn’t let her go, not now, not ever. “Tell me.” Anything to keep her talking, to keep her here. “Tell me about the baby.”

  She blinked up at the sky before she turned her glassy gaze back to him. “She’s tiny but perfect. They named her Kinsey Dawn. She’s almost five pounds and eighteen inches long, and what there is of her hair is red.”

  David looked up and stared into her big blue eyes. “Red hair. Craig will like that. I thought you said they were having a boy.”

  “I dreamed it was a boy, but Daphne always knew she was a girl.”

  “You dreamed about our boy.” He held tight as she tried to wriggle away. “I did, too.”

  “It was just a dream, David.”

  “Make it come true.”

  She sank to her knees and kissed him softly, pushing away when he tried to deepen it. “It’s not about babies, David. I need to make my own choices, have my own life. You have to let me.”

  “I will, as long as you choose me.”

  “You’re not a choice. You’re a part of me. I need to go, to think, okay?”

  He nodded slowly, reluctantly releasing her. He watched as she put her glove back on and turned to go. “I love you, Sophie. Remember that when you’re deciding.”

  Her steps stuttered at his words, but she kept walking until she’d made her way down the hill. He watched every step as she became smaller and smaller, fading away behind the mausoleum. He turned back to the headstone and did what he did on this day every year—planned the rest of his life.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Sophie had said she wanted the truck, so he brought her the truck to the last class of the Sensational Sex series, even though she’d told him not to come. He’d promised to finish out the classes, and he didn’t disappoint. She might be angry he was there, but he couldn’t sit still thinking someone else might be putting her in The Perfumed Garden positions.

  He’d taken the Kama Sutra manual she used to plan the classes from her apartment when he’d snuck in to set up for tonight. The Perfumed Garden was a fifteenth century North African guide to sexual fulfillment. There were eleven numbered postures, but David couldn’t tell which she’d chosen to focus on in class.

  Reading about the first posture had made his decision for him. The basic man-on-top position was designed for couples with significantly different builds. Very straightforward, lacking the creativity of the positions she used for the class. Still, he wondered if she’d planned to include it.

  Making his way to her office, he heard voices and paused. Lance and Tessa were already there, running through the format with Sophie. She wouldn’t look at him, but from the way her shoulders tensed, he knew she felt his presence.

  “Can I talk to you for a minute?”

  Lance and Tessa both turned to him, their eyes widening. David hadn’t spoken to either one of them since his father’s forced confession. He was still angry, but in a twisted way, he understood. They just wanted him to be happy.

  She looked at the clock then at her hands, anywhere but at him.

  “Dad, why don’t you
go check out the studio. I already set it up.”

  She finally looked at him, narrowing her eyes. He waited until Lance and Tessa left before responding. “I’m not running things. I just wanted to talk to you.”

  Her face relaxed as she leaned back in her chair.

  “I figured some things out, and I wanted you to know what I learned.” He pulled the bag from behind his back and set it on the table.

  “You like presents, but easy and fun presents like fruit and chocolate.” From the bag, he handed her the box of chocolate-covered strawberries. She grinned wide, dimples pressing into her cheeks.

  “You want to have the fun of picking out major purchases like a car”—he handed her a toy truck—“or a house.” He pulled the folder out of the bag and handed it to her.

  “What is this?” She narrowed her eyes again. Not good.

  “I think we need to buy a house.”

  “David.” The warning in her voice was as blaring as a ship’s horn.

  “I’m not going to lie down and let you run my life, either. I want a partnership. If you don’t think we need a bigger place, then we’ll argue about it.”

  She slowly shook her head and cracked open the folder.

  “And if you are still trying to figure things out career-wise, I have some ideas, too. I need someone to handle Deliver-Ease full time when it rolls national. You could stay on here, or work in the accounting department at SGI.”

  “David,” she warned again, slamming the folder shut. He’d pushed too far.

  He held up his hands. “Whatever you want. I just want you close.”

  “That’s good to know.” He knew that smile. It was her teasing smile, the one that always pulled him in.

  “What positions are we doing tonight?”

  “The Perfumed Garden.”

  “I know, but which ones?”

  “I’ve already gone through them with Lance and Tessa. You don’t need to worry about it.”

  “We should do the first posture.”

  Her lips twitched as she eyed him. “There’s not a lot to learn about a bent-knee male superior.”

  “It’s designed for people of different sizes. I learned a lot from it.”

  …

  Sophie didn’t want David to stop being in control, she just wanted him to share the control with her. It had been almost impossible for her to walk away from him yesterday, but there was still a power imbalance she wasn’t comfortable with. But maybe, if he understood about the postures, he might understand her, too.

  The postures from The Perfumed Garden were all male dominant, so it might be hard to show him, but she’d try. She would teach him there was more power in giving up control than in maintaining it.

  “We’re going to do something a little different tonight because it’s our last class,” Sophie began after the warm-up, once the couples were together on their mats. “This is our last chance to make sure every one of you takes away something from the course.”

  Walking around the room, she handed each pair two note cards and pens. “Completely anonymously, I want you to write down a problem you’re having sexually. Maybe the reason you are here, or a physical compensation you need to make. We’re going to try to answer that problem with a position from The Perfumed Garden.

  “The Kama Sutra and The Perfumed Garden were written centuries ago to answer questions just like the ones you’ll be writing. The books have endured because the solutions work.

  “While you are thinking about it, I’ll give you an example. As you may have noticed, David is a couple of inches taller than me.” She hoped the laughter from the class meant they were warming to her idea.

  “In The Perfumed Garden the first posture compensates for this.” She returned to the raised platform and lay on her back, pulling him down with her.

  “In the first posture, the woman lies on her back with her knees pulled back. The man kneels between her legs, his hands at her sides. She then presses her calves on either side of his hips. Because he is on his knees there is less pressure on her body to support his. The man also has a lot of control over the depth of penetration. Thinking about what makes your partner comfortable will help you relax and perform better.”

  She kissed David pertly on the nose and rolled him off of her. “Now that we’ve thoroughly mortified David by making him simulate sex in front of his father, I’ll collect your questions and see how The Perfumed Garden can help you.”

  …

  The students loved her idea, almost as much as they loved Tessa and Lance’s announcement about an advanced class. Their questions were endless tonight, but she stayed out front, answering them all.

  Closing the door behind the last of them, she retreated to her office, expecting to find David with his feet on her desk like he owned the place. Which he now did. Instead, she found the keys to her truck on top of her desk and “See you at home” scrawled on a note.

  Chuckling, she collected and bundled up her things, noticing he’d swiped the folder with the houses, as well as her strawberries. He better not eat them all without me.

  He’d parked her SUV right outside the front door, the yoga mats already on the seat, which had been pulled all the way forward. Climbing inside, she noticed a sticky note on the stereo panel. We need to get a song.

  God, he was cute. Too cute really. She smiled as she started the truck and made her way back to her apartment. They were going to be okay. Maybe she’d go with him on his trip, as long as they could make it back for the holidays. She didn’t want to miss Kinsey’s first Christmas.

  Spending every day together, they could really talk, and figure out just where they wanted to go. She couldn’t decide what she wanted to do with her career until she knew for sure if David was part of her future. With the money from the sale of Working It Out, she could go into business for herself or take David up on one of his offers.

  She knocked before letting herself into her apartment. Opening the door, her eyes widened as she took in her living room bathed in candlelight. Tiny tea lights flickered on every surface. The room seemed warmer than usual and was filled with an amazing cinnamon aroma.

  Her grin stretched while she peeled off her jacket and gloves. As David stepped out of the bedroom wearing his tuxedo, Sophie noticed candlelight flickering in there, too. She’d heard make-up sex was supposed to be good, but this was going to be exceptional.

  “I’m underdressed.” She smiled as he approached.

  “You can change if you want, but not into that red dress. That thing short-circuits my brain. And if you take off your clothes, I doubt I’ll let you put any back on.”

  She loved the way the light danced with the desire in his eyes.

  “Why didn’t you dance with me at Daphne and Craig’s wedding?”

  Where did that come from? “I told you, I had to take care of my mom.”

  “How long is a song, Sophie? Three minutes? Why wouldn’t you dance with me?”

  She looked at the floor. Not now. “I don’t know how.”

  “I thought you said you didn’t lie.”

  “Really.” She looked into his eyes. “I don’t know how. I never went to school dances or out to clubs or anything. It didn’t seem important.”

  “I’m not buying it. I’ve seen the way you move. You teach aerobics classes.”

  “Ah”—she raised a finger—“I teach yoga and Pilates, neither of which requires rhythm.”

  He didn’t even try to argue. “So you’ll learn.”

  “I could, I guess. I didn’t know you liked to dance.”

  “I don’t. I only dance at weddings.”

  “Another rule?” she teased, stepping closer. “You know what I think of your rules.”

  “I think you’ll want to leave this one unbroken.” He looked down at her, framing her face with his hands. “Take off your shoes.”

  “What?” she asked, shaking his hands free.

  “Take off your shoes.”

  “I heard you,” she said, k
icking off her sneakers. “Why?”

  He lifted her up and set her feet down on top of his own.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Teaching you to dance,” he said, wrapping an arm around her waist.

  “I thought the object was to not step on your feet.”

  “This is how I taught Kelly to dance. I only know one way,” he said, and began to guide her around the living room floor.

  “That’s sweet.” She stretched to wrap her arms around his neck.

  “Nah, it was purely selfish. If she could dance with me at family weddings, I could avoid partnering my dad’s sisters. This is selfish, too. From now on, you can dance with me at weddings and save me from the bridesmaids.”

  From now on. She liked the sound of that, whether he meant it the way she did or not.

  “I’ll get some really high heels.”

  “I got you a present.”

  “I like presents.” Especially now that he understood the difference between a present and a major purchase.

  “It’s in my pocket.”

  “I really like that present,” she said, reaching her hands into his pants pockets and rubbing them along his hard thighs. “Hey, there really is something in here!” she squealed, pulled out the box, and stepped back.

  She tried to breathe as she stared at the tiny burgundy box. Earrings, she chanted to herself. Don’t look disappointed. She closed her eyes and swallowed hard against the lump in her throat. She didn’t want it to be earrings.

  When she opened her eyes, he was down on one knee. For a change, she looked down at him. He reached for the box. She pressed her hands together, realizing they were shaking.

  “Dance with me at our wedding, Sophie.”

  Her eyes filled as her emotions swelled within her. When did he change his mind? The world blurred before her as she blinked, meeting him on the floor. Her mouth found his as she tried to communicate all the sensations coursing through her body.