Cassidy James

by Ashley Wilcox

  “Yeah, why?” I replied, then took a sip of my cola.

  He snickered, not at all convinced. “I’m pretty sure if looks could kill, Blakely would be ten feet under by now.”

  I rolled my eyes then brushed my hair back with my hand. “The kid’s a douchebag. It won’t take long before Cass figures it out,” I assured him, and I hoped to God that I was right. There was that small pang of doubt in my chest that she wouldn’t figure it out, that Cass would feed into his bullshit, and then eventually into his ways. The thought killed me inside. Seeing it…

  I just couldn’t.

  “And if she doesn’t?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.

  I rubbed my face with both hands. I couldn’t even fathom the thought, and quickly blocked it before I could think about it one second more.

  “She will,” I said, but instead of facing him, my eyes were back on Cassidy. “She’ll see it.”

  Abby and I mingled before finding our seats on the bleachers. I wanted to be front and center. Usually the football games were something I glanced up at once and a while, socialization my main purpose, but now that Connor and I were kind of sort of talking, I felt this insane draw to watch every single play of the game.

  “Oh my God. Oh my God….” Connor just threw the ball all the way down the field to, I don’t even know who that is, but he caught it, and he’s running for the end zone.

  “Yay!” I jumped from my seat, and up and down, hugging Abby first and then the person standing next to me even though I had no clue who they were.

  “Did you see that?” I asked Abby, completely blown away by how far Connor threw the football. “How far do you think he just threw that?”

  “What? Why are you looking at me like that?” I asked a moment after, noticing Abby’s eyebrow was up and was staring at me like I was some crazy person.

  What’d I do?

  “Really?” she sniped. “Should I start calling you Coca now?”

  Huh? What the heck was up her butt?

  She shook her head, then continued on with her awkwardness. “I’m gonna go get a drink from concession. You want anything?”

  “No, no thanks,” I replied, completely lost. I tried to think of what could be bothering her as I watched her walk away. She was acting almost snippy with me all of a sudden and I had no clue why. Abby never was like this, at least not to me. She was being a total buzzkill.

  When she was out of view, I turned my gaze back towards the game. Connor was running off the field, his helmet in his hand. He looked even more amazing covered in sweat. Our eyes met when he glanced up towards the bleachers just before reaching the sidelines where one of the JV boys was waiting with a cup of water. He nodded his chin in my direction and winked, his pearly whites showing. I looked around to see if anyone else saw it, but no one was looking in my direction. Whatever.

  I was a like a love-struck idiot, weakening by the second. Tell me not every girl dreams of a moment like that? Star quarterback does a little shout out to you as he walks off the field after throwing an amazing touchdown pass? People write books about this stuff. I was living it. I was that girl!

  Why was I reveling in this moment all by myself?

  Of course! First fucking play Blakely throws a twenty-yard pass downfield, where Brayden Michaels just so happens to be completely open and runs the ball into the end zone.

  All hail the god Connor Blakely!

  And there Cassidy goes, jumping and going nuts over the douchebag.

  I shook my head. This was completely asinine. How could my best friend, someone I’d known for eternity, someone I knew inside and out be so brainwashed and gullible to his cocky-ass ways? And she wondered why I questioned our still going to the dance together. If he was so amazing, why hasn’t he asked her to go? Maybe because he’s a selfish asshole!

  Ugh! Why can she not see it?!

  “I need a drink,” I told the guys as I stood.

  “Pretty sure they don’t sell those kinds here,” Caleb joked.

  “Anything would be refreshing right about now,” I answered before I started to shimmy down the row, making everyone have to stand to let me through. Of course, I had to sit directly behind Cassidy three rows up, because apparently I was becoming crazy stalker guy now.

  I ran my hand through my hair. Was I stalking her? What the hell was happening to me? I was seriously starting to lose my mind. I was obsessed. I was following her.

  I was…

  “Hey, buddy,” a friendly voice sang from beside me. The greeting came with a slight nudge.

  I turned to my left to see Abby standing in line at the concession. I honestly didn’t even realize I’d made it there already. My mind was so clusterfucked with Cassidy and the newfound knowledge of my creepiness towards her.

  “Hey, what’s up?” I replied, trying to shut off all prior thoughts in my head. I had to stop. People were going to start taking notice, and then sound the gossip train…I’d be done for.

  “You okay?” she asked, looking at me peculiarly. “You look like a kid who accidently wandered away from his parents.” She was joking, but her entertained toned turned serious and all amusement vanished when she noticed my unwavering expression.

  Yeah, I suck at lying or withholding the truth. Both are the same, I suppose. Clearly, Abby read me like a book.

  “Yeah…totally,” I replied, shrugging my shoulders.

  Totally? Who says totally? I sounded like an idiot. I might as well throw in a puberty-stricken squeak, too.

  “Graham,” Abby started in a sympathetic tone.

  I closed my eyes and sighed. I knew that it was pointless trying to convince Abby anymore at this point. She clearly saw through my bullshit cover, if that was what you wanted to call it.

  “I saw you at Caz Pizza.”

  Great.

  “Yeah?” I answered. Depending on at what point that she saw me there, this conversation could go in two different directions. I believe when I walked into the place I didn’t look like Satan claiming his next victim, so I could be in the clear if she saw my arrival. It was my departure that was scary.

  “And the way you were looking at Cass,” she continued.

  I was looking at Cassidy a certain way?

  All I could remember was wanting to kill Blakely.

  “And what way was that?” I asked, acting confused. Playing dumb was my new attempt at dodging awkward conversations.

  Abby tilted her head like I should’ve known the answer, like it was so obvious that my questioning it was ridiculous.

  Fuck! I sucked at this game.

  “What?” I chuckled, making her accusations seem comical. “I seriously didn’t know I was looking at her in a particular way.”

  “Why don’t you just tell her?” Abby obviously wasn’t going to play along with my antics. This was the problem with small town living. We all know each other way too well. You can’t get away with jack shit with anyone!

  I ran my hand through my hair, because Jesus—this was a conversation I wasn’t ready to have. I honest to God didn’t know what I wanted with Cassidy. How was I supposed to explain my crazy train of thought lately to someone—to Abby!—and then expect her to understand?

  Yeah, sure, I cared about Cassidy…a lot…but what the hell would I say to her if given the opportunity? Be mine? Be with me and not Connor? Let’s be more than friends? I didn’t even know if that was what I wanted. I liked our relationship. It was comfortable. At this point I just didn’t want her with Blakely. That was really it. Her being with me wasn’t technically part of my equation.

  “She’s been obsessed with him forever, Abby. Now he’s single and she’s gung-ho about the dipshit,” I explained, the annoyance at the both of them back in my voice.

  “That’s not what I was talking about,” Abby quickly pointed out, crossing her arms. “You love her. Just admit it.”

  Wait. What?

  I scratched my head before looking around. This wasn’t something I wanted overheard, and too much
for me to deal with at the moment.

  Love Cassidy?

  I mean…we’d have to discuss what kind of love she was talking about. Yeah, I loved the girl, but the way Abby was talking…

  “She’s my best friend.” That was true. And all I could confirm at the moment.

  Abby rolled her eyes at me pretty much the same way Cass always did. I guess I had a way with making girls do that.

  “Yeah, and Jared Leto is just okay.”

  What? How’d she go from me being in love with Cassidy to bringing up Jared Leto?

  She shook her head. “One day it’ll click. And for the record,” she said as she moved up to next in line at the counter, “Connor is overrated.” She smiled before turning to tell the cashier her order.

  I didn’t respond, but I couldn’t help but smile. Pushing my hands into my pockets, I snickered to myself as I waited my turn in line. If Cassidy didn’t have Abby on her side when it came to Blakely, it was only a matter of time before Cassidy would see his true colors, too.

  We won by one touchdown. It was the most intense game I had ever watched, which I guess didn’t say much since I could count on one hand—okay, maybe one finger—how many football games I had actually watched before. But I did this time, and it was crazy nerve wracking.

  The football team exited the field all together. I stood right next to the opening that they passed through so that Connor would see me, but he walked right by without acknowledging me. Even though it was kind of a bummer, I knew it was only because he was still riding the thrill of the game and talking to one of the guys next to him. I couldn’t be mad.

  “We should find Graham so he can give you a ride home,” Abby said from beside me.

  I sighed. He would be the only way for me to get home, even though we didn’t even hang out or talk during the game. Unless I wanted to call my parents for a ride, I guess—ew. I saw him once walking from concession earlier and waved, but that was it. I wanted to see Connor though, and at least say congratulations and goodbye first.

  “I just want to run up to school first,” I told Abby, already moving in that direction, following the last of the football players. By the way, why did they need so many on the team? Only a handful of them actually played.

  Abby quickly started to follow, but I could hear her reservations in her response. “You should really find Graham first!” she called after me.

  I know. She was right, but I was having a stubborn moment. If Graham left before I found him, then I’d cross that bridge when I came to it. For now, I was on a mission.

  “I’m fine. Don’t worry about it.”

  We waited excitedly with everyone else outside of the locker room. I couldn’t wait to see Connor and give him a huge hug. I was still melting from his little shout out at the beginning of the game. There was already talk moving around about whether Connor and I were a couple. I neither confirmed nor denied it when two girls came up and asked me during the game, but I sure as heck had a giddy smile on my face when I answered.

  Abby was totally annoying, checking her watch a zillion times as we waited. I got that she was concerned, but…

  “Connor!” I shouted, my attention derailing as the team started to exit. I swear the entire freaking school was in the hallway, all pushing and shoving to get near the guys when they started to empty through the doors.

  I was completely annoyed as I got washed up in everyone, jostled back and forth in the throng of people.

  Seriously!

  And then it was like the sea separated just for me, and I had a clear path straight to Connor. He saw me right away, walking towards me with the most incredible grin on his face. I jumped up into his arms as soon as I was close enough.

  “Ahh! That was so amazing!” I exclaimed as he held me close to his body, my feet still off the ground. Connor’s body was so hard, and rigid, and amazing. I felt like I was floating, weightless in his arms.

  “Did you see that pass at the end?” Connor asked, all wide-eyed and excited as he put me down.

  I nodded my head so quickly, feeling his energy. “It was—” I started to say but he cut me off.

  “Had to be the longest pass in school history!”

  “I bet,” I agreed, but had no clue if that was important. I didn’t know anything about this stuff, especially stats, but he was so thrilled about it that I agreed anyway.

  Conrad Jones clenched Connor’s shoulder as he passed us. “Nice game, bro.”

  “Thanks, man.” He smiled in response, then continued to do the same to the million other students that came over to congratulate him. I just stood there beside him and smiled at everyone. I guess this was the duty of a girlfriend that dated a big time football player—just smile and wave like I was totally paying attention to everyone.

  “Cass…” I heard Abby say from beside me, pulling on my arm.

  Ugh! Why was she in such a hurry?

  “Hold on. Just one more sec,” I said over my shoulder before turning back to Connor. I barely had a chance to talk to him and I wanted to real quick before we left.

  “Yeah, my house,” he said to a passing player before finally turning back to me. “What’re you guys doing tonight?” Connor asked us, his focus now completely on Abby and me.

  I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t know, why?” I really was just planning on going home. My curfew was in a couple of hours, leaving me not much time to do anything else, but I wasn’t about to admit that out loud, especially to him.

  “I’m having a huge bonfire at my house. You should come,” he said, his pearly whites shining.

  I gave Abby a pleading grin. We had to go. I wasn’t missing out on going to an after party at Connor’s house, and I needed her to come. I couldn’t go by myself, and I think I could possibly persuade my parents into letting her give me a ride. I could say Graham left or something. They knew and trusted her. It could work.

  “Sorry, told my parents I’d be right home after,” she said with a straight face.

  What?

  I looked at her strangely. Why was she acting so…bitchy?

  “I could give you a ride.” Connor interrupted my glare.

  “Oh, uh…” I mumbled, shaking away my bewilderment at Abby’s response. I had no clue with how to answer. The no driving with anyone rule was embarrassing, and I didn’t want him to know about it. “Um, let me just uh, call my parents quick and let them know,” I said, hoping and praying that my parents would be super amazing tonight and just say yes.

  “Yeah, sure,” Connor responded, clueless. “I forgot something in the locker room anyway.” He leaned over and pecked my forehead.

  Oh my word. So freaking cute!

  “I’ll be right back,” Connor called as he jogged towards the locker room doors again. There was practically no one left in the halls by now.

  “Um, how are you going to pull this one off?” Abby asked as soon as Connor was out of hearing distance.

  “I’m just going to call my parents and ask.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Well, I’ve gotta go,” she said, pulling her keys from her bag.

  “Wait! You’re leaving?” I asked, shocked.

  “Yeeaaahhh…”

  “Aren’t you going to wait to see what they say?” I’d need a ride home if they said no.

  “If they say no to Connor, then they’d say no for me, too,” Abby pointed out.

  I tilted my head. True.

  “All right…” I guess. “I’ll call you later then,” I said, feeling uncomfortable. I still couldn’t believe she was jetting. This was a huge party. How could she not want to go?

  She didn’t answer, only nodded her head in acknowledgement before walking away. Abby was acting so flipping weird, but I didn’t have time to think or try to figure out the reasoning. I had to call my parents before Connor got back.

  Taking a deep breath, I pulled my cell phone from my back pocket and dialed my home telephone number, crossing every finger and toe as the phone rang.

  “Hello,
” my mom cheerfully answered the phone.

  “Hey, Mom,” I greeted her, trying to keep my tone as chipper and normal as possible.

  “Hi, honey, is the game over?”

  “Uh, yeah. They won at the very end,” I gushed, biting down on my lower lip afterwards.

  “Oh good!” she answered happily, sounding genuinely excited for our team. “Are you on your way home?”

  “Well, no,” I said before taking another deep breath. Now was the time to ask. She was happy. “I’m still at the school. Everyone is going over to Connor Blakely’s for a bonfire now, so I was wondering if I could go?”

  “How are you getting there?” she asked, making my entire body slouch immediately. There was the million dollar question.

  “Well, Connor said he could bring me,” I said quickly, closing my eyes and silently saying a little prayer.

  The brief silence before she responded felt like eternity.

  “As long as you go right there and nowhere else,” she said, causing my excitement to bloom. I seriously thought I was going to jump up and down, I was so flipping ecstatic.

  “Really?!” I questioned, making sure that my ears weren’t failing me.

  “I’m serious, Cassidy. Nowhere else,” she repeated sternly.

  “Yes. Yes! I promise.” I was so full of joy I thought I might explode with it. “Thanks, Mom.”

  “You’re welcome, Cass,” she responded, slightly laughing with her words. Clearly, she could tell how excited I was with her answer. “But make sure you’re still home by curfew.”

  “Yup. Midnight,” I agreed. “I’ll be there.”

  Although I hated that I had to be home so early—most of my friends didn’t even have curfews—I was too excited about her letting me drive with someone other than Graham to argue it.

  As soon as I thanked her once again and we said our goodbyes, Connor came walking out of the locker room. Perfect timing! He had on a Cazenovia football t-shirt and some faded blue jeans. With his backwards hat and his duffel bag strap across his chest, I swear he looked just like a professional athlete. He was so freaking hot, it was almost unbelievable that I was leaving with him.