Ordinary Hero
Page 25
“It's okay,” Krystal said. “You don't owe me an apology. But there is something that I owe you.”
With me holding Carter in place, Krystal wound her leg back and let it fly at his crotch as hard as she could. Krystal's black heel landed right between Carter's legs and his body instantly went limp. I let him fall to the floor and he curled into a ball, holding his crotch with both hands.
“That's for shooting me in the simulation,” Krystal said, then kicked Carter in his side. “And that's for being a jerk in real life.”
Carter laid on the floor holding his balls, moaning. Krystal and I looked at each other and both smiled.
“You ready to get out of here?” she asked.
“After you,” I replied, holding out my arm.
We left the philosophy building and walked down the street to a Dunkin' Donuts. Krystal and I each got a coffee and sat down at a table outside.
“You and I make a great team,” I said. “It almost felt like we were in the simulation back there.”
That's when a scary thought crossed my mind: What if we were still in the simulation? Grabbing Carter's finger and spinning him around, restraining him like that was something that seemed straight out of the simulation. I normally wouldn't have had the courage to do something like that.
But the more I thought about it, the less likely it seemed I was still in a simulation. This was the real reality – whatever that meant. Being in the simulation had changed me, though. It taught me that, if I can let go of my fear and anxiety, I'm capable of much more than I'd ever thought possible.
“We do make a good team,” Krystal replied a moment later after swallowing the bite of breakfast sandwich she had in her mouth. “But you know who I think would make an even better team?”
“Who?” I asked.
“You and Kasie. Are you going to ask her out like you said you were going to when we were in the simulation?”
“I... I mean, I want to... but I don't want to mess up our friendship.”
“Don't think of it like that,” Krystal said. “Think of it as taking your friendship to the next level. You and I had a lot of fun in the simulation. But the way your face lit up when you looked at Kasie – I never saw you look at me or any other woman like that. It's obvious that you have very strong feelings for that girl. And I can see why. She's a sweetheart and she's beautiful. You need to tell her, James. You need to tell her how you feel. Summon that inner confidence that you found in the simulation and let Kasie know how you feel about her. She deserves to know.”
Krystal was right. When I was in the simulation, I'd promised myself that I would ask Kasie out. But now, I was having second thoughts. Actually, it was more like my one-thousand-and-second thought. I'd gone back and forth with myself countless times. One minute, I wanted to tell Kasie how I felt, the next minute I didn't. But Krystal was right. I owed it to Kasie to tell her how I felt about her. And that's exactly what I planned to do.
“You're right,” I said. “Thank you, Krystal. I'm going to do it.”
“When?”
“Tonight at dinner. I'm whipping up a big Mexican feast for the two of us.”
“Will you let me know how it goes?” she asked. “I know I don't actually know Kasie in real life but I feel like I do. If she's anything like she was in the simulation, I know I'd get along great with her.”
“There's no doubt in my mind that the two of you would get along well. In real life, she's just like how she was in the simulation. It was almost scary how realistic the Kasie in the game was. And yes, I'll let you know how it goes.”
Krystal smiled at me and I did my best to smile back, though it was challenging with a mouth full of bacon, egg, and cheese on an English muffin. We continued to talk while we ate our food and drank our coffees. Eventually, her and I said goodbye and we went our separate ways.
I'm not sure where Krystal went, but I was off to the grocery store to buy food for dinner. I really wanted it to be a special meal, so I went all out. By the time I was done shopping, I had two big paper bags full of groceries. I brought everything back home and, after putting it all away, relaxed on the couch for a while. Kasie had left for school and I had the whole place to myself. After everything I'd been through, it was nice to just relax, put my feet up, and zone out for a while.
* * * * *
Kasie messaged me in the afternoon to let me know that she'd be home around six, so I got started on dinner just before five. I spent the afternoon mostly watching TV and working on my report for Professor Amundsen. At one point, I tried playing video games – one of my all-time favorite things to do. I just couldn't get into any of them, though. Playing games on a screen loses a lot of its magic once you've been in a simulation that's virtually indistinguishable from reality.
I made tacos, hard and soft shell, using three different types of meat. I also whipped up some homemade salsa to put on the table with tortilla chips. Kasie loved my tacos and homemade salsa, so I really wanted to wow her. I'm sure that alone would've been enough to impress her, but I really wanted to go all out. I put two lit candles on the table and two wine glasses. By the time the table was set and I dimmed the lights, it all looked pretty romantic – to me, anyway. Hopefully my roommate would feel the same way.
Six o'clock rolled around and everything was ready. Kasie wasn't home yet, so I put on the TV and watched the news for a few minutes. There was nothing out of the ordinary going on – no unarmed robberies or anything – and I found comfort in that. The knob on the front door turned and in walked Kasie. Immediately, my heart rate doubled.
“Honey, I'm home!” Kasie yelled, something she'd said many times before when entering the apartment.
She walked in and looked around. I shut off the television and got up off the couch. All the lights were off except the dim stove light and the two candles burning on the dinning room table. Kasie looked at the table and then at me with a slightly-confused look on her face.
“What's going on?” she asked, slowly. “What's all this?”
“What?” I replied. “I can't put together a special meal for us?”
“I didn't say I don't like it. I just... What's the occasion?”
I walked over to Kasie and stood directly in front of her. My heart felt like it was going to beat right out of my chest. She put her bag down on the floor and I took her hands into mine.
“I want to talk to you,” I said.
“That's good,” she replied and smiled.
“Good?” I asked. “Why?”
“Because I want to talk to you, too.”
Well, that derailed everything that I'd been rehearsing in my head all day. What could Kasie possibly want to talk to me about? Had I done something wrong? My mind automatically went into panic mode and started thinking about worst-case scenarios. I had to reel it in and pull myself together. I had no idea what she wanted to talk to me about.
“Why don't we sit down,” she suggested.
Kasie and I had a seat on our couch. We sat right next to each other, so close that our legs were touching. Kasie looked as tense as I felt. Neither of us said anything at first. We both just looked at each other, waiting for the other one to speak. Then, we both did.
“You go first,” Kasie and I each said at the exact same time.
There was a brief moment of silence, then we both spoke again.
“You go ahead.”
We just looked at each other for a second and then both burst into laughter. It seemed to cut through at least some of the tension in the room.
“Go ahead,” I said, putting my hand on Kasie's knee.
“Okay,” she said, then paused for a moment. “So, I take it you know that I helped Brian to come into our apartment and hook you up to that weird machine, right?”
“I didn't know his name was Brian, but yes.”
“I didn't want to – not at first. I mean, he was just some dude trying to talk me into giving him access to my best frien
d while he's sleeping. It sounded quite shady. But after he showed me the permission slip you signed and talked me through the whole process, I agreed to help him, but only under one condition.”
“Which was what?” I asked.
“That I be allowed to be in the room with you and him the whole time. He said no initially but, when I refused to budge, he eventually gave in.”
“Okay,” I said, unsure of where she was going with that.
“After he paralyzed you and hooked you up to the machine, there was a monitor that showed what was happening in the simulation. I saw everything that you saw. It was sped up and choppy at times, but I saw it all.”
Uh oh. Kasie saw everything that I did in the simulation. That means she saw all the women I had sex with and all the ass kicking I did. I wasn't so much embarrassed about kicking ass, but I really wished that Kasie hadn't seen me with Amber, Melissa, and Krystal. Then, I realized that Kasie saw herself in the simulation and some real embarrassment started to kick in.
“Were you able to hear the audio, too?” I asked, hoping she'd say no.
“Yup,” Kasie replied. “Well, not all. Maybe not even most. But there were times when Brian was able to play the audio along with the video.”
“I want you to know that I knew I was in a simulation at the time,” I said, trying to explain myself before Kasie said anything else. “So, everything I said and did in there, it was like playing a video game. I knew it wasn't real. In real life, I never would've...”
Kasie put her finger over my lips and I stopped talking.
“James,” she said softly and slowly. “Relax. I'm not mad about anything I saw or heard. But, if I'm being honest, it did change the way I look at you.”
Again: uh oh.
“Change how?” I asked, not sure if I'd like the answer.
“You know I've always loved you as a friend,” Kasie said, taking one of my hands in both of hers. “But seeing you taking charge, going around kicking butt, getting attention – lots of attention – from women... It made me see you in a different light. I'd never really thought about you like that before. You know, like that. But, after seeing what I saw, even if it was in a virtual world, changed that.”
“So, to be perfectly clear: What are you saying?” I asked.
“I don't know what I'm saying,” Kasie replied. “I just wanted you to know that I really liked the James that I saw in the simulation. It's like, it was definitely you, but the best version of you. I don't know. I probably sound silly.”
“It doesn't sound silly at all,” I said and smiled. “I get it. And thank you for telling me.”
“What was it that you wanted to tell me?” Kasie asked.
“I'll tell you over dinner,” I replied. “I don't want our food to get cold.”
I stood up and pulled Kasie up off the couch with me. We went into the dinning room and she had a seat at the table.
“You really went all out, huh?” she said. “Is this a special occasion? Are we celebrating something?”
That remained to be seen.
“Nah, I was just in the mood to do something a little different. Wine?”
“Please.”
I poured us each a glass of wine, brought the food over to the table, and had a seat. My heart was starting to beat more like a human's and less like a hummingbird's. I was still a bit nervous but, after what Kasie had told me, I was feeling a little more confident about what I was about to do.
“So,” Kasie said after eating a few salsa-drenched tortilla chips, “what did you want to talk to me about?”
I took a big gulp of wine and pulled my chair closer to Kasie. Even though I'd rehearsed several different ways to tell her, my mind was blank. I knew I had to say something, so I just let all my thoughts and feelings come out completely unfiltered.
“We've been friends for a long time – best friends.”
Crunch. Crunch.
“Yup,” Kasie said with a mouth full of hard-shell taco, crunching away. “BFFs. Besties. Long time.”
“And I value our friendship more than anything else in the world,” I continued.
Crunch, crunch. Crunch.
“Me, too,” she replied, still chomping away.
“Kasie,” I said, grabbing her taco-holding hand. “Please. Let me say what I have to say and then you can continue crunching away.”
Maybe having the talk during dinner wasn't such a great idea. I hadn't taken into consideration that everything on the menu was incredibly loud and crunchy.
“Sorry,” she said and swallowed what was in her mouth, putting her half-eaten taco down. “Go ahead.”
“I realized a lot about myself when I was in the simulation,” I said. “I realized that I'm a lot more capable than I thought I was. I realized that I can be courageous and confident. And, most importantly, I realized that I've secretly had feelings for you for a long time – I was just too afraid to admit it to myself. It's not a secret anymore, though. That simulation made me realize that I not only love you as a friend, but as much, much more than that.
“You're the most wonderful woman I've ever met. You're smart, funny, cheerful, and – excuse me for being blunt – downright sexy. I've always thought so but was too afraid to say anything to you. Hell, I was too afraid to even admit it to myself. But I'm not afraid anymore. My experience in the simulation taught me to let go of my fear and to have confidence in myself, to go after what I want with all my heart. And what I want, Kasie, is you.”
She didn't reply right away. Kasie reached out with both hands and I took them into mine. We sat there for a moment, staring at each other's face in the candle light. Kasie looked as gorgeous as ever. I noticed a tear forming in the corner of her right eye and I gently wiped it with my left hand, then brushed a few stray hairs behind her ear.
“James,” she said, slowly, “I don't know what to say.”
That's the last thing I wanted to hear. Anything would've been better than that. My mind went right into worst-case-scenario mode but I shut it down immediately. “What would I do if I was still in the simulation?” I thought to myself. I knew exactly what I would've done and that's precisely what I did.
“Then don't say a word,” I said, then leaned in and kissed her.
29.
Kasie and I started kissing, slowly and gently at first. I ran my fingers through her hair and lightly grabbed the back of Kasie's head, pulling her toward me. Her kisses were the sweetest kisses I'd ever experienced – figuratively, not literally. Literally, they were the most taco-flavored kisses I'd ever experienced. Flavor aside, every kiss was magical.
She ran her hands over my face, then down my sides and around my back. While our food was getting cold, things with us were warming up. Our kisses became more passionate and we were both breathing a little heavier than before. We continued kissing and running our hands over each other's body for a long time – several minutes, at least.
“Your kisses feel incredible,” Kasie whispered in my ear, then grabbed my inner thigh. “And so do you.”
“You are incredible,” I replied. “You have no idea how long I've wanted to kiss you.”
“Is that all you've wanted to do to me?” Kasie asked in the sexiest voice I'd ever heard her use.
“I think we both know the answer to that,” I replied with a half-wink, half-smirk.
“You know this changes everything,” Kasie said in a not-quite-as-sexy voice but still pretty hot. “If we do this, things will never be the same ever again. There's no turning back.”
“I'm done living with regret,” I replied. “I've wanted you for a long time, Christina. This is the new James Callahan. I go after what I want with all I've got. No more letting fear control me. I'm not afraid that this is going to change things. I'm afraid of living the rest of my life wondering what could've been.
“Will this change our relationship? Yes, of course it will. It'll make it better. It'll build upon the years of friendship w
e've shared. It'll give us an opportunity to get to know each other on a whole new level. Are there risks? Could it all blow up in our faces? If we're being honest: yes, of course it could. But, like I said, I'm done missing out on life because of fear – of what could happen.
“So, to answer your question: yes, I know this changes everything and I welcome that change. I have better chemistry with you than anyone I've ever met and I can't wait to see what the future brings for us.”
“Wow,” Kasie replied, her face lighting up. “Good answer. And, for the record, I feel the same way. I've always loved you as a friend and have thought about you like that a few times over the years but didn't think you felt the same way. And, after seeing you in the simulation, being all strong and manly, hooking up with all those beautiful women, it made me see you in a different light. I don't know how to explain it.”
“Then don't,” I said, running my fingers through Kasie's hair, pulling her head closer to mine. “Just go with it.”
“Okay,” she said and smiled.
I leaned in and our lips met. Like before, we started kissing slowly and gently, but the heat level ramped up quickly. I grabbed a handful of Kasie's hair and playfully pulled her head back, revealing her neck. Sliding my tongue from her lips to her neck, I began showering it with wild, passionate kisses. Kasie moaned and it was unquestionably the sexiest sound I'd ever heard come out of her – up to that point, anyway.
Things heated up quickly. Our hands explored each other's body as we kissed. Kasie was still wearing what she had on when she got home: a long, purple dress with flip flops. She wouldn't be wearing it much longer, though. The first thing to come off was her bra. I didn't have much real-world experience taking off bras but all the action I got in the simulation gave me the confidence to go for it. As we kissed, I reached behind Kasie and, with the flick of the wrist, I popped her bra off, first try.
She pulled my tee shirt off and tried to throw it over the dinning room table, but it didn't quite make it. The shirt hit the half-full bottle of wine and sent it flying over the edge. Kasie got up to go try and stop the wine from pouring out, but I grabbed her arm and pulled her body up against mine.