by L. B. Dunbar
“What?” His eyes turn wild. “Why?”
“Because they’re important to me.” This is a test, but I’m not playing games. I need someone outside myself to tell me I’m crazy to want this man. I’m crazy to give in to a request to go to New York with him. I need someone to talk sense into me.
Jacob rolls off me, and I know he’ll decline. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Why?” Here’s the moment of truth when he says he doesn’t do family and meeting them is like stepping into commitment.
“Because I’m not good with other people.” His head turns to face me. Lying in the snow in Ethan’s front yard, we should be talking someplace else, but I don’t want to move. Not yet.
“You do okay with me,” I tease. He’s an introvert, that’s for certain, but he easily opened up to me that day we met in the hospital. We’ve been working together ever since.
“That’s because you’re you.” He rolls to his side to face me better. “There’s something about you that makes me feel free to speak.”
My brows pinch. He’s a man of words. He speaks all the time through his writing, but then I recall what he told me the other night about his father and the abuse. The worlds he created to lose himself or save others. He couldn’t speak up for himself in his real life, so he did it through his fantasy storytelling.
“Come to the Tavern, and I’ll go to New York.”
“Jesus,” he hisses, rolling back in the snow and staring up at the dark late winter sky. “You’re in the wrong business. You should be in negotiations or something.”
“Is that a no?” I tease. He turns his attention back to me.
“That’s a you drive a hard bargain, but I’ll seek my retribution on you, my pretty.” He rolls his entire body back over me and swipes down the side of my head with a glove-covered finger. Then he brings the finger to his mouth and bites the glove, removing it. His warm fingertip traces along my cheek, and he watches it move.
“I’ll do anything you ask,” he whispers, and my heart flutters faster before he kisses me to seal our deal.
Chapter 15
Family Matters
[Pam]
By seven thirty on Thursday evening, Jacob hasn’t shown, and I’m second-guessing everything.
“How did you get Jacob to agree to come here tonight?” Ella asks when she first arrived with Ethan.
It’s actually strange to see Ella as an addition to our weekly family gathering, but we’ve added Emily, Jess’s fiancee, and Leon, Tricia’s fiancé, over the past six months. It feels like everyone is pairing up except me, the token single woman in the group.
“What happened with you two the other night? The tension was as cold as an icicle.”
I really long to discuss all the things with someone, but Jacob’s stepsister is probably not the best candidate to hear my concerns. That’s what Mae is for as my best friend, but I haven’t opened up to her either. Ella reaches for my wrist.
“You can tell me anything,” she whispers as she’s told me her fair share of secrets. When I helped her leave last November, I thought it best if she start at the beginning and tell me everything. Her tale is sad and twisted, but not without a happily ever after. At the time, we needed to make a plan of action for her. The course included three months of self-discovery, setting her future in motion, and seeking therapy for her past.
“Nothing happened,” I lie, playing the pretending game I’ve played for years. It was only sex. But if that’s true, why did he kiss me, ask me for a chance, and agree to come here tonight?
“Jacob told me he asked you to go to New York.” Ella’s voice rises with her enthusiasm.
“You’re going to New York?” my sister asks me. Her hand rubs over the small swell that isn’t visible yet, and I want to be happy for her. She has everything she ever dreamed of.
“I’m undecided,” I mutter.
“I hate to hear that.” The deep male voice behind my seat causes both Ella and me to spin and face Jacob, dressed head to toe in black. His normally edgy expression was heightened while his eyes said he was nervous. I stand to greet him. I hold out a hand, and he stares down at it a moment before slipping his fingers into mine.
“More hand holding,” he mutters, and I shake my head, biting the smile on my lips.
“You’re late,” I tell him.
“I’m on deadline,” he states. “But my assistant wanted me to meet her family.”
“She sounds like a real hard-ass,” I tease.
“She can be.” He smirks and leans closer to me. “But she also has a great ass, so I’ll do whatever she asks.”
My face heats, and I turn away from pointing at people around the table. “You know Ethan. This is my sister, Tricia, and you mentioned you already know her fiancé, Leon Ramirez.”
Leon holds out a hand. He has cappuccino-colored skin with almost midnight eyes and a devilish smile. With tattoos on him, his dark look isn’t much different from Jacob, but Leon has a more relaxed expression about him.
“They aren’t so bad,” Leon teasingly tells Jacob, nodding his head at our family. “Have a drink.”
Jacob instantly relaxes under Leon’s easy welcome, and I mouth my gratitude to my future brother-in-law.
“So, we have something we’d like to tell everyone,” Tricia says, drawing the attention of all eyes at the table. They’ve already announced their engagement and pregnancy, so I can’t take much more sappy news. I’m not jealous, not in the traditional sense. It’s just that all my family members are finding their true loves, and I’m sitting next to someone I’ve been in love with for too long. For days, I’ve been wavering on his New York invitation, trying to convince myself not to accept. I’d only be setting myself up for more heartache.
“We got married,” Tricia states, excitement and hesitation in her voice.
The air wooshes out of me, and the rest of my family sits in various positions of shock and awe, stunned that we hadn’t all been included on this important day for them.
“Mom knows, and we asked Jess and Emily to be our witnesses,” Tricia explains. “We would have had Lys and Levi do it, but they aren’t old enough.” Lys is Leon’s youngest sister, and Levi Walker is the youngest brother of Tricia’s first husband. He’s like a child slash little brother she never had, and they have a unique relationship.
“I didn’t want to wait,” Leon says, lifting Tricia’s hand with his and kissing her knuckles.
“And I didn’t need the fanfare of a big wedding,” Tricia adds. She’s already had one with a man who turned out to be everything opposite we could want for our sibling. In addition, her life has been a whirlwind for the past six months or so. “We just wanted to keep it simple.”
“I wasn’t invited,” Tom states, a scowl on his face as the eldest of us.
“I’m sorry.” Tricia’s eyes shoot to Jess for support, but he shakes his head. It made sense to have Emily and Jess as witnesses as Leon and Jess have formed a new friendship, and Emily has grown close to Tricia.
“Well, I think it’s wonderful,” Karyn interjects, soothing Tom’s momentary pout.
“Please be happy for me,” Tricia whispers, and I look over to find her watching me. My sister and I aren’t terribly close, but we are still sisters, and I want what’s best for her. Leon is that best.
“Of course,” I say, reaching for her hand. I am happy for her. I’m only unhappy with me.
“You need a party,” Ethan suggests. “Let me throw you a reception.”
“Oh, man,” Leon mutters, looking over at Ethan. “You don’t need to do that.”
“That’s not necessary,” Tricia adds, smiling at Ethan for offering.
“I want to do it. You both deserve it, and I owe Leon for all his help with my place. We need to celebrate.” Party could be Ethan’s middle name, but I admit this is a show of acceptance. Ethan and Leon are good friends now. “I’ll plan everything.”
The suggestions break out, and the conversation shifts to when to h
old the party and what to serve. Emily joins the exuberance as Jess and she are getting married this summer with an actual wedding on Ethan’s property at the old red barn.
With a focus on Tricia and Leon, I figure Jacob and I are saved from scrutiny. However, too soon, my family shuffles to my guest and me. The firing squad begins.
“So, how’d you meet Pammie?” Tom teases, calling me a name I haven’t heard since my dad.
“She works for me.”
“Sexual favors,” Ethan coughs into his hand like the teenager he once was.
“Ethan,” Ella shrieks, but a wide smile curls her lips.
“Things a brother does not want to hear,” Jess grumbles, but Emily smiles back at me as well. She winks. We’ve already discussed how her location app found me. I just happened to leave out the details of what I’d done at Jacob’s house.
“Because you’re the boss,” Jess states, recalling when he met Jacob at the house. After I drove myself home that day, I didn’t get the inquisition I expected from my brothers.
“I’m the boss,” Jacob states, his head turning to face me. A mischievous energy comes off him.
“The boss?” Karyn questions. “Not the boss-boss?”
I don’t even know what that means.
“The mystery man she’s in love with?” Tricia blurts out, surprised and then equally embarrassed that she’s just ratted out my emotions. Anxious tears well in my eyes, and I want to crawl under the table. I hate my family at this moment.
To my surprise, Jacob holds my hand tighter, crushing my fingers before lifting them for his lips. He kisses the tips. “That’s me. The boss-boss who Lilac is in love with.”
“You have a nickname for her?” Emily squeals. Jacob and I still face each other, and I blink back the tears. I’m the one who asked him to be here, yet I’m mortified at how this is playing out.
“She’s my angel,” he whispers to me. Then he surprises me a second time and leans forward to kiss the corner of my lips. As he pulls back, Ella’s smile is so large it hardly fits her face, and Ethan chuckles before he says, “You all owe me twenty bucks.”
The table erupts in hisses and discord as I listen to my family quibble over bets they placed on my mystery man and me.
“Twenty bucks said he’d fallen for you,” Ethan explains, and my mouth falls open.
“That might not be fair. You have insider information,” Jacob tells him, and Ethan laughs.
“Gambling isn’t fair.”
“When did this happen?” Ella wonders.
“When did what happen?” I question, unable to admit anything because I don’t know what’s happening right now. I brought Jacob here thinking my family would see he doesn’t feel a certain way about me, yet he’s playing opposite what I expected. I wanted the voice of reason from them, and they’re turning against me.
“It’s been a long time coming,” Jacob admits to his sister, and I’m still not sure I believe all that I’m hearing.
As the table turns to other conversation, Jacob looks over at me, still holding my hand.
“You know what this means, right, Lilac?”
I stare at him a second.
“I came to meet your family, so you’re off to New York with me.” He smirks, having won his own bet and getting his way. “Our flight leaves next Wednesday at nine o’clock.”
“You’re proud of yourself, aren’t you?” I tease.
“I’m happy you’re giving me a chance.” His tone turns sober, but his smile expresses his pleasure. He really wants to spend this time with me.
When the night wears down, and my family disperses, Jacob walks me home, holding my hand. He lifts our cold fingers to press another kiss to my knuckles.
“You know, this hand-holding thing isn’t so bad,” he teases, his eyes shifting to me a second. I laugh.
“You survived my family.” I exhale, warm breath misting in the cold night. “Thank you for coming tonight.”
“They weren’t that bad, once Jess got over wanting to kill me for having my way with his sister.”
“My family doesn’t know you did that,” I mock. However, there can’t be much doubt that the boss-boss and I have hooked up. Jacob was attentive all night, holding my hand or keeping his palm on my thigh. He even swiped my hair along the side of my face a time or two, and it felt so intimate despite being so public.
As we near the pharmacy, Jacob turns to me. “Did I have my way with you? Did I ruin everything?” The hesitation in his tone tells me he’s truly concerned.
“You already apologized,” I remind him. “It was a misunderstanding.”
“But I want to be clear that the night wasn’t a mistake, Lilac.” His head lowers, his fingers rubbing over my knuckles.
I step closer to him, cupping his face despite my cold hand. “Jacob, you just came out of a bad relationship. We got caught up in the night. I don’t want to push you into something you aren’t ready for.” Maybe I’m not ready for Jacob because I don’t want to be his rebound girl. His second choice.
He lifts my fingers again, curling his other hand over our linked ones and kisses them.
“Were we caught up? Or was it the pull?” His eyes look at me over his mouth on my knuckles.
“Jacob,” I groan.
“So hand holding?” He shifts subjects, shutting down his question. “You’ve created a monster in me. I think I like it.” His eyes sparkle under the dim streetlamps. “And to prove that hand holding does not need to lead to sex, I’m going to kiss you and say good night.”
I start to laugh at his playfulness until a hand slips into my hair, and his mouth crashes mine. My body falls back against the exterior wall of the pharmacy as his lips master mine. Instant heat rushes my body as his tongue thrusts into my mouth, and he moves it in such a way that mimics what he did with it between my legs. It mimics what he’s done to me, entering me, surging into me, filling me. It’s erotic and wild, and I can’t get enough. I tug him closer to me, but it isn’t enough with our winter clothing between us. He tilts my head one way and then the other, not missing one spare spot of my lips before drawing back, leaving me breathless and collapsed against the wall.
Wow.
“Going to walk away now before I beg you to take me upstairs.”
Beg. Please beg. But I also like how he wants to show me not everything leads to sex.
He doesn’t walk away, though. He kisses me hard and fast once more and then breaks free, leaving me still panting against the building.
“Upstairs,” he whispers, brooking no argument. “Now.”
I think he means to follow me, but he doesn’t. He waits as I race up the stairs to my apartment and enter it. My heart hammers in my chest as I fall against the door, wondering how I’ll survive a weekend in New York with him.
Chapter 16
New York: A City That Needs Sleep
[Pam]
The following Wednesday, Jacob picks me up for the drive to Cherry City Airport in Traverse City, where we will fly to Detroit and then connect to New York. He offers to buy me a coffee after we check in, but I can’t stomach anything so early.
My excitement builds with each step of the process until the plane taxis to the runway. My hands clutch the armrest as the speed increases for takeoff.
“What’s this?” Jacob teases, taking note of my fingers white-knuckling the divider between us.
“I haven’t flown in a long time, and I’m just a little nervous.”
Chuckling, Jacob takes my hand, kisses the tips of my fingers, and then rests them in his lap.
“Hand holding,” I mutter.
“Look at me,” he whispers, and I turn my head to face him. His mouth lands on mine, thoroughly distracting me as we enter the sky and level off. Our tongues tangle as he pulls me deeper and deeper into the kiss. I’ve latched onto him like he’s the air I need to breathe. When he finally leans back, tugging my lower lip with his, his dark eyes spark.
“Kiss me like that again, and we’ll be
testing admission into the mile-high club,” he teases.
“You’re probably a founding member,” I snark.
His playful eyes narrow. “Actually, no.” This surprises me.
“Most unusual place,” I question, unable to let it go and hoping this conversation will continue to distract me a bit.
“My couch before the fireplace in my home.”
“Jacob,” I groan. It’s such a line.
“I’m serious. I’ve never had sex in that place.”
What? I stare at him. He’s lived there for over two years. Then again, I’ve been in his home often enough to know he hasn’t brought Mandi there. I assumed he might have had random hookups from town, but I’d hear of them, too. Jacob wouldn’t be someone a local woman could keep a secret.
“What about you?” he asks, and I think back to all the mundane places I’ve had sex. A bed. The back seat of a pickup truck. There really hasn’t been anyplace out of the ordinary or any place as romantic as a leather couch before a fireplace during a snowstorm.
“A leather couch in front of a fireplace in my boss’s home.”
“Yikes. Does he know you did that? I hope it was after working hours.”
I laugh. “It was after working hours. And he knows.”
Jacob’s eyes brighten. “I’m sure he’ll never forget the experience.”
I shake my head. He’s too sweet.
We’re up and down from Traverse City to Detroit before I know it. Another flight and Jacob repeats the distraction, kissing me until I’m breathless and considering mile-high club admission.
I’m working on fumes by the time we get to Jacob’s condo in the city that never sleeps. I’m exhausted, but I’m also wound up. I want to get inside Jacob’s place and play out the things my imagination dreamed up about airplane sex. His kisses have left me wanting to be close to him again, and I’m excited to see where this trip leads for us.
When we enter his place, I marvel at the industrial look and feel. The old warehouse was converted to lofts, and the exposed brick of one wall is beautiful. That same wall has a modern wrought-iron and wood-slat staircase leading upward to a balcony with three doors. Jacob explains two bedrooms are located up there with an adjoining bathroom. He has floor-to-ceiling windows, arched under brick headers, letting in loads of natural light and reminding me a little bit of his place in Michigan. The main space is an open concept with an L-shaped kitchen in a corner, a dining table next to it, and the living area. Compared to his home on the lake, the furniture is in white tones with metal accents. It lacks comfort.
