One Snowy Night

by Rita Bradshaw

  ‘My pleasure.’ Clarissa leaned forward and took her hand. ‘Will you come to Foreburn for Christmas Day? We would love to have you.’

  Ruby had accepted this invitation for the last two years and she knew the house would be crowded with friends and family. Quietly, she said, ‘Thank you but no, not this year, but it’s very kind of you.’

  Clarissa stared at her. ‘Edward won’t be coming – he’s spending Christmas in America.’

  With her. ‘Nevertheless, I won’t come.’

  ‘About Edward.’ Clarissa paused. Since her brother had gone off across the ocean she had done some hard thinking and one thing she was sure of. He and Ruby should have been together. He had been in such a state that night of the party when he had arrived back at the house after taking Ruby home, and when he told her what had transpired, she had urged him to go straight back and bang on Ruby’s door. He had almost glared at her as he said, ‘You’ve changed your tune. The last time we talked about this you were of the opinion that there was no meeting point between her class and ours, if I remember rightly. “The class system is still alive and well.” Isn’t that what you said? Along with the fact that Ruby would be a fish out of water in our world the same as I would be in hers.’

  ‘Yes, I did say all that, and I was wrong.’

  ‘She doesn’t think so. If it’s any comfort, she thinks exactly like you do.’

  ‘Did.’ She had stared at Edward’s tormented face as she had repeated, ‘Did.’

  He had waved his hand angrily. ‘Did, do, it makes no difference. It’s what Ruby thinks that counts.’

  Remembering this now, Clarissa said softly, ‘He’s not happy, Ruby. I know he’s not. His letters . . . Well, they don’t sound like Edward.’

  ‘Some people find it difficult to express themselves on paper.’ The words were spoken so quietly as to be almost a whisper.

  ‘Not Edward. I know he’s—’

  ‘Clarissa.’ Now it was Ruby who paused. From barely being able to get the words out she knew she had barked her friend’s name. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said more calmly, ‘but I don’t want to discuss this. He is engaged to be married and that’s the end of it. It’s – it’s all for the best.’

  ‘Do you really believe that?’

  ‘Yes.’ She had to believe it, needed to, otherwise she would go mad. ‘Yes, I do.’

  Clarissa inclined her head. She wasn’t convinced but she felt as though she had said as much as she could.

  They talked a little more before Clarissa left and Ruby went downstairs to work in her sewing room. It was a Sunday morning and for once she was glad that she was so busy she had to keep her nose to the grindstone non-stop over the next few days if she was going to fulfil her commitments. It meant she couldn’t think about anything else but the job in hand and that was what she needed.

  Apart from stopping for a quick bite at lunchtime and again about six o’clock she worked through till midnight, and she only ceased then because she was so tired she was in danger of falling asleep sitting at her work table. But she had got through a mountain of work, which was satisfying and would also take the pressure off herself and the two girls in the coming week. She had already warned them to make it clear to customers that no further alterations could be promised before Christmas, and that any clothes must be sold strictly on that understanding until the New Year.

  When she walked into the flat, her gaze was drawn to the luxurious carrier bag that held Clarissa’s gift and she felt a stab of contrition. She hoped she hadn’t appeared ungrateful in refusing her friend’s invitation for Christmas Day, but the memories of the previous two years when she had been in Edward’s company would have been too much in her present state of mind.

  She had also declined the same invitation from her mother, but this time it was Olive she had been thinking about. She had seen her sister and niece several times since she and Olive had been reconciled, always at her mother’s house so there was no likelihood of running into Adam, but at Christmas that wouldn’t be possible. Her mother had confided months ago that things were much better between Olive and Adam, but she would have guessed this herself anyway. Olive was twenty-eight years old, but this was the first time ever that Ruby could remember seeing her sister anything other than waspish and bitter. And it was strange, but such was the power of love – and it was abundantly clear now that Olive did indeed love her husband – that there were times when her sister’s face took on an attractive quality and you forgot about her plainness. How Adam felt, Ruby didn’t know, but it was clear he was making Olive happy, which perhaps spoke for itself.

  This thought wasn’t a new one and at first Ruby had struggled with the realization that after all Olive had done, things had worked out for her sister with Adam, her old childhood sweetheart that she herself would have married. But then reason had asserted itself and she’d given herself a stern talking-to. The past was the past and she didn’t love Adam any more, not in that way. Her niece was a beautiful little girl and she needed a loving family home, and whatever had happened to change how Adam treated Olive and his daughter was to be applauded. But at the same time she felt, and she didn’t try to analyse the whys and wherefores, that it was better for everyone concerned if she and Adam didn’t run into each other, at least for the foreseeable future. Her sister wouldn’t like it, and although she didn’t owe Olive anything, especially with regard to Adam, she loved her, and therefore, just in case . . .

  When she fell into bed she was asleep as soon as her head touched the pillow.

  It was the following morning, just before midday, that the bell on the door tinkled and Adam’s youngest brother, Ronnie, walked into the shop. Ruby recognized him immediately even though she hadn’t seen him since the day he had come to see her at Mrs Walton’s with the message from Adam that had altered the course of her life so drastically. In those days he had been a grubbier, much younger edition of his older brother, and now he was the spitting image of how Adam had looked at thirteen or fourteen. Whether it was the memory of that other time that caused Ruby’s heart to drop like a stone she didn’t know, but she found herself incapable of speaking a word as they stared at each other. It was only Polly coming forward and saying, ‘Aye, what is it?’ in a tone that stated all too clearly this high-class shop wasn’t the place for the likes of him, that enabled Ruby to turn and say, ‘It’s all right, Polly. I’ll deal with this.’

  ‘Mam sent me.’ Ronnie, too, found his voice as he flashed an indignant glare at Polly. ‘There’s been a fall.’

  There’s been a fall. They were the words every mining family dreaded. Even before Adam had begun working at the pit she’d been afraid of those words, knowing how close he was to his father and brothers, and then when he, himself, had gone down the mine she’d never been free of the fear. ‘Come upstairs. Polly, you and Sarah take over, and I’m not to be disturbed.’

  Once Ronnie was standing in her sitting room twiddling his cap between his fingers, she said, ‘You’re frozen – come and sit by the fire and I’ll get you a hot drink in a minute.’

  She was putting off the moment when he would tell her, she was aware of that, and maybe he was too because he didn’t move from his spot just inside the door but blurted, ‘They’re all down, me brothers, an’ your da’s bin took bad an’ all. The shock, the doctor said. Mam said I had to come an’ tell you ’cause her an’ da are at the pit gates and Olive an’ all.’

  He was clearly on the verge of tears and through the horror Ruby found herself saying calmly, ‘That’s a good lad, you’ve told me – now come and sit down, all right? Just sit here and I’ll get you something to warm you.’ The icy rain of the last days had given way to a light dusting of snow that morning and now more flakes were drifting in the wind.

  ‘I’ve got to get back.’

  ‘I know, Ronnie, and we’ll go together once you’ve eaten something and had a hot drink. I’ve got my own car so it won’t take long. Have you had anything inside you this morning?’
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br />   He shook his head and rubbed at his nose. ‘Me mam’s bin at the gates all night, she won’t leave.’

  Once she had him settled in front of the fire in her sitting room she made him a cup of tea and a pile of bacon sandwiches, leaving him to thaw out while she went downstairs to explain the situation to the girls. They immediately rose to the occasion, assuring her they would be pleased to hold the fort for however long she was away.

  ‘We’ll stay late and finish all the alterations that need doing, Miss Morgan, and open up at the same time each morning. You stay as long as you’re needed,’ Polly said earnestly. ‘Family comes first every time, that’s what me mam always says and it’s true. We’ll keep a record of anything we sell in the book, don’t worry. We know what’s what by now.’

  It was half an hour later by the time Ruby left, and Ronnie was looking considerably brighter for having demolished the heap of sandwiches and several cups of tea. Just before she slid into the driving seat of the car, Ruby looked up at the white sky. Why was it everything bad seemed to happen when it was snowy? she asked herself painfully, and what was she going to find when she got home? From what Ronnie had said she surmised her father’s heart had been affected by the shock news, and what about Adam incarcerated underground, his brothers too. They had to be all right; anything else was unthinkable.

  On the way into Sunderland, Ruby found herself regretting that she hadn’t spoken to Adam since that first visit home. Not that they had parted on bad terms, not really, and she had made it clear to him that she had forgiven both him and Olive – she was glad about that – but she’d also told him that she had moved on and he must do the same. But what else could she have said? she asked herself. It was the truth, however unpalatable it had obviously been to him. And thinking about it logically, could things at home ever really settle into anything like normality with the ex-sweetheart becoming his sister-in-law and auntie to his child? It was best they didn’t meet; she’d resolved that in her mind before this present fall at the pit. Maybe years hence, when they were all old and grey and the passions of youth had settled into something less fiery, she and Adam and Olive could meet in a family situation without it being a problem.

  On and on her thoughts raced, interwoven with worry about her da’s condition and how her mother was feeling and the terror that the fall was a bad one. Ronnie sat beside her not saying a word, and once they reached the town she drove straight to the pit to drop Ronnie off and also to find out if there was any news before she carried on to her mam’s. She parked the car in Wreath Quay Road and she and Ronnie walked quickly to the crowd standing at the pit gates. It was comprised mostly of women of all ages and a few old men, and there were two constables stopping anyone entering the yard beyond the gates. She saw Olive and Adam’s mother and his brothers’ wives straight away. They were standing in one of the small groups that made up the crowd and Adam’s father had his arm round his wife. No one was saying anything and no one was crying; in fact, on the whole it was eerily quiet.

  As Olive saw her she gave a little cry and then pushed through the crowd to fling her arms round her sister. Taken aback by the open show of affection, Ruby returned the hug and after a moment, when they drew apart, she looked into Olive’s agonized face and whispered, ‘Oh, lass, lass.’ Olive just shook her head, unable to speak, and then slipped her arm through Ruby’s and drew her over to Adam’s mother and the others.

  ‘Hello, lass.’ Adam’s mother’s voice was dull, and as his brothers’ wives nodded to her, his father said, ‘They won’t let me go down, damn ’em, in the rescue squads. Said they needed younger men because the air’s putrid and old lungs wouldn’t cope.’

  Ruby didn’t know what to say and as Ronnie sidled close to his father, Mr Gilbert said, ‘This is why I said I don’t want you going down when you leave school in the summer, all right? Nowt to do with whether you’d be a good miner or not. All the pits are in a hell of a state, your brothers have told you that. Timber’s rotted, there’s water gathered an’ gas built up, an’ the ventilation is shot – an’ the owners aren’t liftin’ a finger to put anythin’ right after the strike. Nor will they. No, nor will they. They won’t spend a penny on makin’ the pits safer ’cause in their eyes miners are barely human beings an’ if there’s falls an’ explosions, so what? A few men an’ lads lost is no skin off their nose ’cause they know there’s more waitin’ to take their places from the herd. An’ that’s how they look at us – animals in a herd from which they can pick an’ choose whenever they like.’

  ‘John.’

  Mrs Gilbert only murmured her husband’s name but it was enough to check the outburst as he glanced at her face, grey with worry. He muttered something and then lapsed into silence, his lips moving one over the other.

  ‘There’s six been brought up dead and ten others injured but alive,’ Olive said quietly. ‘Barney and Toby Johnson were both killed – their mam collapsed when they were brought up.’

  Ruby stared at her sister, aghast. Barney and Toby were identical twins and the same age as Adam; they were their mother’s pride and joy and had still been living at home. Olive reeled off the other names of the deceased, all of whom were known to Ruby, before she said, ‘They were all on one side of the fall in the main road. Adam and the rest of the shift are behind it, but – but they’re worried about the air.’

  Suffocation. Carbon monoxide. Explosion. Death. All the words that had been with her in her early years with Adam rushed through Ruby’s mind but she found herself saying quite calmly, ‘They have air pockets sometimes, you know that, and even a little clean air can be enough to keep a man alive until the rescuers reach him. Don’t give up hope, Olive.’

  ‘I don’t want to live without him.’ It was a whisper for her ears only. ‘I know what I did was wrong and I hurt you and he suffered too, so much because he loved you so deeply, but – but we’re all right now, him and me.’

  ‘I know, I know.’ She didn’t want to hear this in spite of having come to terms with it.

  ‘He’s my life, Ruby. I know I can never be what you were to him but that doesn’t matter. If he dies—’

  ‘He won’t, he won’t. Keep believing that.’

  ‘I’m trying to.’

  Olive’s teeth were chattering with the cold and now Ruby said softly, ‘Where’s Alice? Shouldn’t you go home and see to her, lass? She needs you.’

  ‘No, I can’t leave here, not till – till I know. My neighbour’s seeing to her, I couldn’t take her to Mam’s ’cause of Da. When he knew Adam was one of those who was down he had a sort of seizure. He thinks a lot of Adam. One in a million, he called him, the other day.’

  ‘I’d better go and see how Da is but I’ll come back if I can. Do you want me to bring you anything? A hot drink or something?’

  Olive shook her head. ‘All the folk round about keep bringing us mugs of tea or soup an’ the like. They’ve been very kind.’ Olive caught hold of her arm. ‘What am I going to do?’

  ‘Keep believing he’s all right, that’s what.’

  ‘I can’t.’ Olive shivered.

  ‘Well, I’ll believe for the both of us then.’ Now it was her who hugged Olive, and as her sister clung to her as though she would never let her go, Ruby thought how strange, how terrible and strange, life was. If anyone had told her a couple of years ago, before she had come back to Sunderland that first time, that she and Olive would be one in heart and mind with the past of no account, she wouldn’t have believed them. By the time she turned and walked away both their faces were wet, and as Ruby slid into the car and dried her cheeks on a handkerchief, Olive was still standing where she had left her, a tall, thin figure in the falling snow.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Adam had been aware of the pain even in his sleep but now, as he surfaced from the nightmarish dream, it hit hard. Clenching his teeth to prevent himself groaning out loud, he opened his eyes. Three of the miners’ lamps had survived intact – Walt and two other men had been ahead
of him and the others when the roof had come down, and he thanked God again they weren’t in the dark, although the rays of light were a mixed blessing. They showed the huddle of bodies of men who had been killed.

  He had seen Walt swing round as a terrible, unforgettable sound like a giant grinding its teeth had told them the roof was moving, but then there had been nothing but an almighty cracking and deafening roar as the slabs of rock, choking slack and black splinters had engulfed him, Fred and Pete either side of him and the rest of the shift behind them. He didn’t think he had lost consciousness at that point because he could remember the thick dust suffocating him as he tried to breathe and the feeling that a huge hand was holding him down. It wasn’t until moments later when scrabbling hands had clawed at the rocks and earth and found him, and then attempted to pull him free, that the excruciating pain had sent him into blackness.

  When he had come to he’d found himself cradled in Walt’s arms as his brother had sat with his back resting against the wall of rock. Apparently he’d been out of it for nearly an hour and in that time Walt and the others had pulled several more men out of the mountain blocking the road, but none had been alive apart from him. Fred and Pete had gone, along with Cyril Foster whose wife was expecting their first bairn; Ray O’Leary and Archy Shelton, two old timers; and Desmond and Joe Shawe who were father and son. How many were still buried was anyone’s guess; the whole shift could have bought it because the roof was monumentally unstable. In the middle of Walt and the other two trying to dig out more bodies the roof a little way down the tunnel had suddenly caved in too so they were essentially now entombed in a little pocket of the main road with a fall either end stopping rescuers reaching them.

  He moved slightly, and immediately Walt said, ‘You all right, man? They’ll be through to us in no time, don’t worry.’

  Walt’s breathing was laboured – there wasn’t much air – and for a moment Adam almost said, ‘No time might be about right,’ but that would help no one. Instead he nodded, but even that slight movement of his head brought piercing pain. His whole body from his neck down to his toes felt like it was being stabbed by hot knives.