The Resolution of Callie & Kayden
Page 17
I’m about to get lost inside him when I remember something. ‘Wait.’ I put a hand against his chest, pushing him back a little, causing him to give a sexy, frustrated growl that makes the area between my lips tingle. ‘Don’t you want your present?’
He pushes back from me and arches his brow. ‘What? I thought that sweater was from all of you.’ He’s totally amused with himself.
I glare at him. ‘You did not. I would never, ever be a part of giving you a sweater with an elf knitted on it.’
‘Hey, I like the sweater,’ he insists, actually being genuine. ‘No one has ever given me a sweater. Fuck, no one has ever given me a present before.’
Wow, I can feel the pressure. Maybe I should have gotten something better than I did.
‘Well, don’t get too excited,’ I say, scooting out from under him and rolling off the mattress. ‘It’s not much.’ I reach into my duffel bag to get his present.
He sits up on the mattress, looking about as eager as a kid sitting in front of a Christmas tree. ‘I’ll be happy with whatever you give me.’
I know he’s telling the truth, but still, when I hand him the small, rectangular present, I feel like it’s not enough. I hold my breath in anticipation and sit down beside him as he tears the paper off and chucks it aside. I wait for his reaction, but he just sits there, frozen, staring at it.
He stares.
And stares.
And stares.
With his head is tucked down and I can’t read him at all.
‘I told you I took pictures of us.’ I tap the frame that’s around the picture of Kayden and me kissing at the carnival we went to this summer. It’s actually a really pretty picture, the flashing neon lights and shapes of the rides behind us contrasting perfectly with the starry night above us. ‘Well, Seth actually took this one with my phone, but it’s a gorgeous photo of us. Totally wall worthy, I think.’
He just keeps staring at the photo and I feel like I’m about to lose my mind as I think of all the things that could be wrong. Maybe I’m reminding him of his past too much. Maybe I’m reminding him of everything he didn’t have.
But when I finally work up the courage to say something, a tear slips from his eye.
He’s crying and I’m afraid.
Maybe this was too emotional.
Maybe it was the wrong thing.
As my self-doubts wash over me, he lifts his gaze to meet mine and I realize that I was wrong.
He’s not crying because he’s sad.
He’s crying because he feels loved.
And good God do I love him. More than anything else in the world.
He doesn’t say anything. He just attacks me, his lips crashing into mine and stealing the breath right out of my lungs. But that’s okay; I’ll give him my air, my heart, my soul, whatever he wants. The only thing that matters is that he wants it.
‘You remember the last time we were in this room,’ he says through his panting as we finally come up for air.
I nod, gazing up at his swollen lips before allowing my eyes to rest on his. ‘I do.’ It was the first time we made love.
‘It was one of the most amazing moments of my life,’ he says softly, his body heat warming every inch of me. ‘Did you know that?’ he asks. When I shake my head, he whispers, ‘Well, it was. And even though I didn’t know it at the time, it was the moment I fell in love with you.’
His words sink through my skin and shoot straight to my heart. ‘I think it was when I feel in love with you, too,’ I whisper.
There’s a pause. A silent exchange that words can’t express.
Then we start ripping off each other’s clothes. Buttons fly. Fabric gets thrown. We’re laughing and smiling and he’s crying and so am I for reasons I can’t even understand. It’s like I’m feeling everything all at once and it’s so overwhelming and powerful, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. And when he slips inside me, his body over mine, all I can think of is how safe I feel in a place that once felt like it was surrounded by thorns and vines. A place that felt so unsafe. A place where I lost it all, but now I’m being given it all back and more.
And no, Kayden is not my prince. Nor have I become a princess again.
I am simply Callie.
And he is simply Kayden.
And we are simply us.
And it’s the realest form of perfection that’s ever existed.
‘What are you doing?’ Kayden asks as I sit up from the mattress and stretch my hands over my head. It’s late, well past midnight, and I’ve been lying there for what feels like hours, trying to fall asleep, but it wasn’t working for me. My brain is on. And I mean, on. With words and sentence begging to be written.
‘Nothing.’ I reach for his shirt and slip it over my head. ‘I was just going to do a little writing because I can’t sleep.’
He rolls to his side and props up on his elbow as I move for my bag to get my laptop. ‘So when do I get to read this mystery story?’ he asks, tracing his fingers up and down my spine.
I consider what he said as I run back on the mattress, hurrying because the carpetless floor is freezing my feet. ‘When it’s finished.’
He glances from the laptop to me then cocks his brow. ‘And when will that be?’
I lean against the wall and position the laptop on my lap. ‘Probably tonight. I can feel the ending getting nearer.’ I open the computer and click on the screen. ‘Or at least the open-ending one.’
‘What’s it about?’ He leans over and reads the title on the screen. ‘The Truthful Fairytale.’ His gaze travels up to me. ‘It sounds like it’s about a princess and a prince.’
I shake my head as I put a pillow behind my back and stretch out my legs. ‘Nope. Just a boy and a girl.’
He gives me a curious look. ‘But you’ll let me read it, right? I love reading your stuff. I swear it gives me a little insight into what goes on in that head of yours.’
‘Which is sure madness.’ I do my best evil villain voice and he laughs. ‘And yes, I promise you’ll get to read it when it’s done.’
Seeming satisfied, he lies back down and gets comfortable. I only start really writing, though, when he falls asleep; otherwise, I feel like he’s watching me.
The first date was magical. They ate. They danced. They laughed. They smiled. By the end of the night, the air was so electric the girl had to glance around because it seriously felt like there were fairies hiding in the bushes, sprinkling pixie dust wherever they went.
‘I’m glad we did this,’ the guy said as they walked up a path they’d never taken before, side by side.
‘I’m glad, too,’ she replied. ‘I had a lot of fun.’ And it was the truth. She did have fun and it almost made the night surreal. Maybe she was dreaming. Maybe she’d fallen asleep and none of this was real. If that was the case, then she hoped she’d never wake up.
The stars and the moon shone above them and the houses around them were fast asleep. It was just them. No monsters. No expectations. No kingdoms and queens and kings and palaces.
It was perfect.
And for the first time in a long time, the girl felt safe.
Maybe even daring.
With every ounce of bravery she could summon, she reached over and took the boy’s hand in hers. She half expected him to recoil from the contact, half expected to do the same thing herself. Instead, the boy held on and she gripped tighter.
There wasn’t a spark or a zap from the contact, just a rush of energy as their flesh touched for the first time.
‘You know, I never would have been here if it wasn’t for you,’ he said so abruptly it threw her off guard.
‘What do you mean?’ she asked, stopping with the boy beneath a lamppost. It was the only light on the street and it surrounded them.
He looked down at her with such passion in his eyes, begging for her to understand. ‘That night when you came … when you saved me, it changed the direction of my life.’
The girl felt breathless. ‘How so?’r />
‘Because I’d given up,’ he said, daring to graze his finger down her cheek, causing her to shudder and her heart to skip a beat. ‘I thought the world was full of monsters and there wasn’t really a point in fighting them anymore. That wherever I’d go, they’d be there to break me, but you … you showed me not everyone was a monster.’
‘You showed me that, too,’ the girl replied. The boy looked at her, confused, and she wanted to explain, but she couldn’t just yet.
Maybe that was the key to all this, after all? Not the key to getting her back to being a princess. She didn’t want to be a princess anymore, knew better than to believe in such things. But what she did want to be is a normal girl who could hold hands with a guy without feeling ugly and disgusted.
She just wanted to be happy in her own little world.
‘I wish I could do more,’ he replied with a sad expression.
She didn’t want him to be sad, though.
She wanted him to be happy.
The both of them.
But she had to wonder if maybe he could do more. Or maybe she had to do it herself. Maybe she was the one who had to be brave, to save herself.
Without even thinking, she started to lean in to kiss him, hoping she wouldn’t scare him. To her surprise, he leaned in, too, and the two of them met in the middle.
The joining of their lips didn’t set off an explosion of fireworks. There was no music announcing this was the starting point of their happily ever after. In fact, the light above them flickered off and there was nothing but darkness. But it couldn’t smother the light caused by the fire hidden deep inside each other’s hearts, a fire that could quite possibly burn forever if they chose to let it.
And it was a start.
To happiness.
To a life without monsters controlling them.
And really, that’s all both of them ever wanted.
Not a happily ever after.
Just a happy after.
I’m not sure how long I stare at the screen, deciding if that’s it, but I’m pretty sure it’s at least it for an hour. After the hour’s up, though, I decide I’m happy with it and save it in my portfolio file. Then I lean over to put my computer aside on the floor, not wanting to get out of bed and out from beneath the covers. The room is dark, the only light coming through the window of the door where I can see the moon up in the sky.
‘I forgot to give you your present,’ Kayden says so abruptly I let out a blood-curdling scream.
‘Oh my God, you scared me.’ I catch my breath through his hysterical laughing. ‘I thought you were asleep.’
‘No, I’ve been awake.’ He stifles his laughter and sits up, reaching for his duffel bag that’s beside the bed.
‘This entire time?’
He unzips the bag. ‘Yeah, I was watching you write.’
‘That sounds super boring.’ I lie down in the bed and turn on my side to face him.
‘Actually, it was super entertaining.’ He grabs something from his bag, flips on a lamp nearby, and then turns to me. There’s a small, silver box in his hand and a sparkle in his eyes. ‘Merry Christmas.’ He gives me the box as he lies back down beside me.
I wait a moment or two, trying not to think too hard about what’s in it. Finally, I just open it.
Then I stop breathing.
‘Oh my God, you didn’t have to do this …’ I whisper in awe.
‘I know I didn’t,’ Kayden says, watching me with a smile on his face, ‘but I wanted to.’
Inside the box is probably one of the coolest necklaces I’ve seen. It’s in no way traditional, which makes me love it even more. The silver pendant is shaped like a book, and when I pick it up, I noticed it’s engraved on the front with By Callie Lawrence. It also opens up like a locket but the inside is blank, like fresh pages ready to be stained with a story.
‘Do you like it?’ he finally asks and I realize that beneath his grin, he’s waiting for my approval.
‘It’s perfect,’ I say then lean over to kiss him.
‘Good,’ he says between kisses. ‘I’m glad you like it. It’s for when you write your story. To show I believe in you.’
I almost start crying right there. ‘I love it.’ I put the necklace on, promising to never take it off. Then I lie down and snuggle against him beneath the covers, feeling more content than I ever have.
I’m about to fall asleep when he asks, ‘Can I read it now?’
My eyelids lift open. ‘Read what?’
‘Your story,’ he says with a lopsided grin as he stares down at me expectantly. ‘I saw you type “The End.”’
I suddenly get nervous and my palms get so sweaty I have to wipe them off on the front of my shirt. ‘You want to read it right now?’
He nods enthusiastically. ‘I do.’
‘Um … okay.’ I turn over and reach for my laptop, feeling even more anxious. I hope he likes it, hope he understands it, because really, he’s half the story.
And one of the most important parts.
He tells me I can go to sleep while he reads it, but there’s no way I can shut my eyes. So I end up lying there, staring at all the patches in the ceiling until he finishes. I know the exact moment he does because I can hear his breathing quicken. Then he sets the laptop aside and rolls over to me. He just stares at me and I can’t read him at all.
‘So what’d you think?’ I ask, aiming for indifferent but ending up sounding like a bundle of nerves.
He’s silent for forever, each second passing almost painfully slow. ‘I think it’s beautiful and meaningful and real,’ he finally says, his tone radiating every emotion he’s feeling. ‘Although, I’m pretty sure ours gets a happily ever after.’
‘You think so?’ I ask with a soft smile. ‘Because that’s a big promise.’
His smile reflects mine. ‘No, I know so.’
And then he kisses me.
But this isn’t the end of our story just yet.
In fact, it kind of feels like the beginning.
Chapter 27
#103 Outrun Leave Your Inner Demons Behind and Find Your Love for the Game.
Kayden
It’s the last game of the season and I’m feeling pretty good. Things have been amazing with Callie and I’ve been focusing on the future instead of the past. It’s been that way for the last month, ever since I said my goodbye. I’m not happy all the time, though, but then again no one ever is. I still feel the slightest bit of guilt and sadness whenever I think of my father and how it all ended, but that happens very rarely.
What almost always happens is that I’m happy, not just with Callie and mine’s relationship, but with myself. It took me forever to get to this place, to let go, but I’ve managed to find my own form of inner peace with all that happened to me. And I can honestly say that my life is great at the moment.
Right now, I’m fucking amped up, though, as I get ready to make the last play of the game. If we don’t make it, we lose, but I’m not betting on us losing, In fact, I can feel it in the air, in the hollers of the crowd, in the lights that are so fucking bright it’s blinding. From the fucking way that I’m loving every minute of this.
My team is lined up and I’m hunched over, waiting for the snap. My heart is thudding, my skin damp with sweat, my feet ready. And my mind …
Is silent.
I hear everything. From the sound of the footsteps, to my coach shouting something on the sidelines. I can also hear my own voice.
You can do it.
I know I can.
My heart slams against my chest as the ball is snapped in my directions. My fingers perfectly wrap around it and then I’m running back, looking for the perfect throw. But then I realize there’s no perfect through, but a close one. So I spring my arm back and let the ball slip from my fingers and soar away.
I let it all soar away as I breathe freely for the first time, waiting for it to happen.
The ball climbs higher and so does my pulse. I swear the crowd is holding
their breaths, but maybe that’s because I’m holding mine as I watch the ball reach its peak and then drop.
It drops.
And drops.
And drops.
Then it lands perfectly in the receiver’s hands.
Perfect.
Touchdown!
The crowd starts cheering and so do my teammates as we win the game. And this time I join them, cheering and happy as I look up at the crowd where I know Callie is watching me with pride. But only part of my celebration is because I kicked ass and played my heart out. The other part is because I’ve finally left my inner demons behind and found my love for the game.
Epilogue
A little over a year later …
#595 Make You Happy After Official (because it’s about damn time)
Callie
Life is great. Not perfect, but life never is. But perfection would be boring anyway. For the most part, things are good, though. Kayden and I are still living together, and plan to stay that way for a while. Our walls are covered in photos of us as a couple, with family, with friends. It shows how whole our lives are and how far we’ve both come.
There’s been a lot of talk about him getting drafted next year, though, and we did have the talk even though it’s early. It only took us like two minutes of him laying out all the reasons why he needs me to come with him if he leaves Laramie, and it took me like half a second to sputter that I’d follow him anywhere, that I can write anywhere since that’s what I’ve been doing and plan to keep doing. That a life without him would be a sad life I never want to have.
We have a little routine now where we alternate holidays between my parents’ house and his brother’s in Virginia. I got to meet a sober Tyler about six months ago and that was nice. And Kayden hasn’t cut himself in just over a year. The sadness in his eyes is gone, except for on occasion, like when he gets a random call from his mother. He never answers her, though, or calls her back, and her voicemails are anything but persuading.
But other than the occasional sadness and silly fights, Kayden and I are going strong. He tells me every day that he loves me and I tell him every day how important he is to me. Our happy after is working quite well for us and seems to only get better in time. It makes me excited for what the future holds – our future. Makes me excited that we have a future.