Wicked Honeymoon (An Ivy Morgan Mystery Book 19)

by Lily Harper Hart

  “They’re warm,” Nate said, surprised. “Oh, man. They’re really warm. They’re Italian subs to boot. Those are my favorite.”

  Jack’s stomach growled in appreciation of the scent that was wafting over the table. “That sounds good.” He settled across the table from Nate and accepted his sandwich from one of the food service people, a bright-eyed woman in her forties who appeared to find joy in delivering meals to starving river adventurers. “What about my wife?”

  “We have one for her, too,” the woman reassured him. Her name tag read “Sandy” and she bustled from one end of the table to the other. “You’re the vegetarian, right?” Her eyes were kind when they locked with Ivy’s somber blue orbs.

  “I am.” Ivy bobbed her head. “I bet that makes your job more difficult. I’m sorry.”

  “Oh, don’t worry about that.” Sandy dug in her pack until she came up with another sub. “This is essentially the same sub the others have, just with more vegetables — I hope you like olives — and a slightly different sauce.”

  “I’m sure it will be fine,” Ivy said. “I’m not picky.”

  Jack made a sound halfway between a choke and a laugh and then nodded in agreement. “She’s not difficult at all.”

  Ivy pinned him with a look before her hunger got the better of her and she unwrapped her sub. “Oh, this smells amazing.” She actually thought she might drool. “I didn’t realize how hungry I was.”

  “Who knew sitting in a kayak for hours could make you feel as if you hadn’t eaten in weeks?” Nate mused.

  Ivy dabbed at the corners of her mouth as she watched him eat. He had a bland personality — at least as far as her tastes were concerned — and she couldn’t remember him saying more than a few words. His wife, on the other hand, was a regular chatterbox.

  “How are you enjoying the trip?” Jack queried when Ivy didn’t respond. He wasn’t keen on the other honeymooning couple thinking they were rude or uninterested.

  “It’s pretty fun,” Nate replied. “I wasn’t certain I would be able to sleep outside, but I went down like a rock last night.”

  “We’re not technically outside,” Ivy pointed out.

  “Oh, we’re as close to sleeping outside as we ever want to be,” Vanessa intoned. “I honestly wanted to go to Hawaii for our honeymoon — I thought it would be better for our brand — but Nate wanted to do this. He said, from a business perspective, that it was probably best for me to do something that was outside my comfort zone because that would result in more views.”

  Jack felt as if he were having a conversation with an alien when Vanessa spoke about her job. “I don’t exactly understand what you do,” he admitted.

  “I’m an influencer,” Vanessa replied blankly.

  “Yes, but ... .”

  Nate waved his hand. “Don’t try to understand it. It’s not a real job.”

  Vanessa glared at her husband. “I bring in more money than you.”

  “That doesn’t mean it’s a real job. I’m an actual doctor.” He took another bite of his sandwich, chewed, and then swallowed before speaking again. “Basically she goes on the internet, paints herself as a ditzy blonde who only cares about makeup and clothing, and people eat it up. When I first met her and heard what she did, I thought she was likely an idiot. Then I realized it was all an act.”

  “You didn’t think I was an idiot,” Vanessa countered. “You were hot for me.”

  “Oh, I liked the way you looked,” Nate agreed. “That doesn’t mean I didn’t think you were an idiot.”

  Sensing trouble, Ivy smoothly stepped in to redirect the conversation. “I slept really well last night, too. We kept two sides open and closed the tent at the front. It was nice to hear the wildlife buzzing ... and the breeze. Oh, and I loved hearing the river underneath it all.”

  “That was nice,” Vanessa agreed after shooting her husband one more dark look. “It was actually really nice ... except when the people were outside the tent talking, I mean. That was only like twenty minutes, though.”

  Ivy frowned. “I didn’t hear people outside talking.”

  “You were farther away from the center of things,” Vanessa noted. “I’m sure it was quieter by you guys. I heard people out there for a good twenty minutes. They were talking, although I couldn’t quite make out what they were saying. And, trust me, I listened hard. I mean ... hard hard. I wanted something to distract me from Nate’s snoring.”

  Nate reared up, offended. “I don’t snore.”

  “You do so.”

  “I do not.”

  “You do so.”

  Jack cleared his throat to cut off the argument. “Did you notice if it was a man or a woman outside? Maybe both.”

  “I honestly couldn’t make out who it was or what they were saying.”

  “Did it sound like an argument?” Jack pressed, ignoring the look Ivy slid in his direction.

  “I don’t know.” Vanessa held out her hands and shrugged. “It was just voices. I found it annoying because I wanted to sleep. They must not have been out there too long because I crashed out again pretty quickly and didn’t wake up until this morning.”

  And found blood outside your tent, Jack wanted to add. He wisely kept the statement to himself, though. It would lead to nothing but trouble. He was certain about that.

  “Anybody extra hungry?” Sandy asked as she appeared at the side of the table, two subs in her hand. “We have two extra sandwiches and they’re going to go into the garbage if you guys don’t want them.”

  Jack, sheepish, held up his hand. “I could eat another half of one.”

  “I’ll split it with you,” Nate said. “I could eat another half, too.”

  “We’ll take the other one,” Damien offered from the adjacent table. “They’re really good.”

  Sandy beamed at him. “We aim to please.”

  “Do you make extra sandwiches for the uber-hungry?” Ivy queried. “It’s a smart idea if you do.”

  “Oh, actually we don’t because they don’t like us to waste food,” Sandy replied. “We usually have just enough, but the previous group was down two people so they didn’t eat and it looks like they’re not with you either.”

  Jack froze, his sandwich halfway to his mouth. “What do you mean? How could the previous group be down two people?”

  Sandy shrugged. “I have no idea, but that’s what they told me. I thought the couple would be with you, but obviously I was wrong.”

  “Where did they go?” Jack couldn’t simply drop it. He was incapable of ignoring a mystery.

  “You’ll have to ask the other group when you catch up,” Sandy replied. “I don’t have any information, other than what I’ve already provided.”

  “Well, great.” Jack glanced at Ivy and she could tell what he was thinking.

  “We don’t know that it’s anything yet,” she warned.

  “We don’t, but it’s looking more and more likely, isn’t it?”

  She didn’t want to feed his mania, but she was suddenly nervous. “Let’s not panic until we have something to panic about.”

  “Fine. When we have something to panic about, though, I’m going nuts.”

  She shouldn’t laugh, she told herself. It would only encourage him. She couldn’t help herself, though. “That sounds like a fine idea.”

  9

  Nine

  Ivy wanted to be in the back of the kayak for the afternoon trip, but Jack blocked her way before she could climb in.

  “I’m steering today.”

  She glared at him. “This isn’t a testosterone thing.”

  “I agree. I have more upper body strength, though. That means I don’t get as fatigued as you do.”

  “I don’t get fatigued.” Ivy was insulted. “I’m in great shape.”

  “You are. I happen to love your shape. This isn’t a man-versus-woman thing, though. This is a common sense thing.”

  “Are you saying I don’t have common sense?”

  “Of course not
. I value my body parts too much to ever say anything of the sort. Although, there have been a few times when I’ve wanted to break down and explore what you see as common sense.”

  “I’m the smartest person you know.”

  “You are. Book smarts are not the same as common sense, though.”

  “Oh, I’m a beast on the streets, too.”

  Her fire was only one of the things he loved about her. Right now, for instance, he wanted to kiss her senseless because he adored the defiant expression on her face. He knew better than to show weakness, though. She would use it to her advantage.

  “Honey, I’m being practical. If you want to go fast — and it’s obvious you do — then I should be in the back.”

  “Give me one good reason why.”

  “I can muscle us there faster. You’ll get tired.”

  “We’ve been over this. I’m in fantastic shape.”

  “And I would never say otherwise. You don’t lift weights, though. I work on my upper body ... so I can be hot for you.”

  “Oh, don’t even.” Ivy held his gaze for an extended beat, briefly wondering if she could wear him down. Odds were she could, but it would take more time than they had to waste. “Fine! I’m steering tomorrow, though.”

  “We’ll talk about it then.”

  “Oh, no. Fair is fair. This is a partnership and I want to steer tomorrow.”

  Jack knew he wouldn’t be able to win the argument two days in a row so he simply nodded. “You can steer tomorrow.” Unless I come up with a viable reason for me to steer, he silently added. “Let’s get this show on the row.”

  “Right.” Ivy held the kayak while Jack climbed in. She had to admit, he was catching on fast. He was a natural athlete and didn’t struggle with the intricacies of commandeering the kayak the way other newbies might. She would’ve been impressed under different circumstances. Since his prowess was standing in the way of her being the boss, she had no intention of marveling at it.

  Once she was secured in her life jacket and seat, they started down the river. Damien and Carter opted to pick a comparable pace so the gregarious couple was within hearing distance — and talking distance for that matter — right from the start.

  “You guys seem tense today,” Carter noted from the front of his kayak. He was always perfectly happy to take what Ivy considered the powerless position and she didn’t understand why. “There’s not already trouble in paradise, is there? I have to say, I thought you guys were couple goals yesterday. The way you’re going at each other this morning is giving me pause, though.”

  Ivy made a face. “We’re not fighting. We’re ... communicating.”

  “Yes,” Jack agreed readily. “This is how it is every day in our lives.”

  Carter’s eyebrows hiked. “You fight this much?”

  Jack hesitated and then shrugged. “I don’t know if I would say we fight this much regularly, but we are infamous around Shadow Lake for our fights.”

  “I’m easy to get along with,” Ivy offered. “He’s the one who likes the fights.”

  “Don’t even.” Jack shook his head. “She likes to fight just as much as me. We’ve been fighting since the day we met. I fell in love with her mid-fight. She gets my blood boiling. I don’t know what to say.”

  Carter chuckled, delighted. “I like feisty couples. You two are definitely feisty. You still seem off today. Yesterday your arguments were just banter. Today they feel like something more.”

  Jack hesitated, considering, and then decided to bring Damien and Carter into the fold. He liked them, and he was curious if they’d seen or heard anything the previous evening that would be cause for concern. “I’m a police detective,” he started.

  “I know. That was mentioned last night when you were having a fight with that blowhard Bart. He’s a real jerk, huh?”

  Jack nodded, grim. “He’s definitely a jerk. I don’t like him at all.”

  “We don’t either,” Damien said. “He thinks he’s better than everybody and he’s mean to his wife.”

  That was exactly the sort of dirt Jack was looking for. “How is he mean to her?”

  “He beats her down.”

  “You mean with words, right?” Ivy asked slowly when Jack didn’t automatically respond. “You haven’t seen him hit her or anything, have you?”

  “Oh, no.” Damien was solemn. “I’m not a big guy, but if I’d seen anything like that I would’ve gone after him. I don’t care if I get hurt or not. You can’t beat a woman.”

  “My honey bear is a hero,” Carter offered up on an adoring smile. “I don’t care what that beast of a man says, we married for love, just like you.”

  “We did marry for love,” Jack agreed. “Ivy drives me nuts, but I love her more than anything.”

  “Oh, I never doubted that.” Carter winked at him. “We’ve done a lot of weddings together over the past three years and you two are more in love than just about anybody.”

  “I like to win so you should tell me who these other couples are who are supposedly more in love than us so I can beat them up.”

  Ivy snorted.

  “Who are you trying to kid, honey? You’re just as competitive as me,” Jack reminded her. “You would want to beat them up, too.”

  “Is that why you two have been fighting?” Damien asked curiously. “You guys have been really intense this morning. You were ultra lovey-dovey last night. It was nice to see, and everybody knew why you excused yourselves early to head back to your tent long before the fire started going down. We thought it was adorable.”

  “Bart thought you were doing it just to prove him wrong,” Carter added.

  “Well, Bart is a turd,” Jack shot back. “He might never have loved his wife but that doesn’t mean the rest of us don’t love our spouses.”

  “I think mine is the bee’s knees,” Carter gushed.

  “Oh, don’t say that.” Damien wrinkled his nose and clenched his eyebrows together, an expression Ivy found absolutely adorable. “You know I hate it when you say that stuff in public. You only do it to get a rise out of people like Bart, and he’s not here. Ivy and Jack don’t think it’s cute.”

  “Oh, I think it’s pretty cute,” Jack countered. “What do you think, honey? Am I the bee’s knees?”

  “More like the bear’s stares.” The response was out of her mouth before she could think about it and then she laughed at her own joke. “See, that’s funny because you think bears have been staring at us.”

  “You’ve seen bears?” Carter’s face drained of color. “Are you serious?”

  “Now look what you did,” Jack chided. “No, I have not seen a bear. You don’t have to worry about bears anyway. They only attack if food is left unattended or they feel their young are in danger. If you see a little bear, run the other way and you have nothing to worry about from the mama.”

  Ivy twisted in her seat so she could glare at her husband. “That’s a very practical way of looking at things,” she noted, sarcasm on full display.

  Jack refused to acknowledge her tone, but inside he was chortling. “I think so. We did see some weird footprints during our lunch stop yesterday. Tyson didn’t know what they were and then he whipped out a story about Bigfoot when I mentioned bears.”

  “Ooh, I would love to see Bigfoot.” Carter looked positively giddy at the prospect. “That’s on my bucket list.”

  Ivy didn’t miss Damien’s eye roll and had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing. In a lot of ways, the other couple were parallels to her and Jack. She liked it.

  “Go back to Bart and his wife,” Jack prodded. He was unable to let his inner detective rest. “What sort of things have you heard him say to Lily?”

  “Ugh.” Carter’s scowl returned. “He’s just really mean to her. He barks at her if she walks too fast and then does the same if he feels she’s being slow. He yells about her clothing choices, even though she looks cute as a button.”

  “He also blames her for this trip,” Damien a
dded. “Apparently it was her idea. He thinks they should’ve gone somewhere else, a hotel with wi-fi access preferably, so he could get some work done. I heard her reminding him that their therapist said they needed to go to a place to focus on each other, but he doesn’t seem keen at the idea.”

  “I figured they were trying to save their marriage,” Ivy mused. “Personally, I don’t know what they’re fighting for.”

  Jack didn’t like that defeatist attitude one little bit. “Are you saying you wouldn’t fight to save our marriage?”

  “Of course not.” Ivy emphatically shook her head. “We would never get to that point, though, because we started from a different point. We fell head-over-heels when neither of us was looking for anything. No matter what Bart says, we’re not the type of people who would look for monetary or business gain in a marriage.”

  The statement placated Jack some. “No, we’re not.”

  “I get the feeling that they got married for entirely different reasons,” Ivy said. “I think it’s likely Bart wanted a showpiece wife that he could trot out for corporate meetings. He’s an oil tycoon, so Lily is probably expected to wear a nice dress, be polite, and hobnob with the other wives.

  “I mean ... can you picture them sitting down together, even at the start of their marriage, and plotting out their dream house?” she continued. “You and I spent hours over the winter, when we were snowed in next to the fire, drawing up schemes for the basement renovation ... and your man shed that we’re going to add to the back of the property eventually.”

  Jack warmed at the memory. “You said you would never enter my man shed without knocking.”

  “And I won’t. I have no idea what you’re going to do out there, but I understand that you need a place that’s yours, whether to brood or simply take a nap. That’s what my library is to me and you go out of your way to make sure that’s my room.”

  “That’s your favorite room in the house.”