Once Upon a Christmas Past

by Regan Walker

  “I am sorry for all the problems I have caused you.”

  “Do not be. I would do everything again to have you. If only for one night.” He leaned over and kissed her and Noelle felt as if she were in heaven. Now she would not have to worry that Nicholas had regrets, but his next words brought a black cloud over her happy thoughts.

  “We will depart in the morning,” Nicholas said with far more conviction than he felt. “Together we will face what we must when we reach Camelot.”

  Chapter 16

  Blackness surrounded the procession as they made their way through the sleeping countryside toward Camelot. The torchbearers were spread throughout the procession to provide light for the column of Nicholas’s men.

  The brisk wind blew the white banner with the scarlet-red dragon, making the dragon look as if he were alive as they rode. Noelle drew her mantle closer around her to ward off the nighttime chill. She wished she had Nicholas to warm her, but he was nowhere near, having chosen to ride near the front. Which was just as well.

  What could they say to each other? They knew nothing of what lay ahead of them, and it was better not to dwell on it.

  Noelle could see Thor’s foggy breath as it curled from his muzzle. Even the horse was impatient to reach his destination and find someplace warm to sleep for the rest of the night.

  A screeching noise came from overhead—a sound that Noelle had come to recognize. She looked up to see Boots flying overhead keeping watch. Noelle found the bird’s presence very comforting, even among this army of soldiers. After all, she had seen the bird in action and knew how well she could defend her.

  Finally, they topped a hill, and Camelot came into view. The castle appeared like a bright, twinkling star amidst the dull blackness. Noelle wasn’t sure whether she was frightened or happy to see the holding, and then decided it was a mixture of both. Nicholas would smooth everything out with King Arthur; she had to believe that. It was the only way she could go on.

  The sound of chains rattling shattered the brittle darkness as the drawbridge lowered and the portcullis rose. The guards had recognized Nicholas’s banner, and had opened the gates without challenge. The drawbridge touched the ground with a loud thud, and the procession started across the long bridge.

  Noelle took a deep breath for courage. The time was near.

  Most of Nicholas’s men stopped at the stables in the outer bailey. A few rode into the inner bailey with their leader, as did Noelle. The yards were quiet, as everyone had gathered in the Great Hall for the evening meal.

  Noelle looked around at all the greenery on the small huts and the tiny red ribbons tied around the many torches that hung from the walls. She’d almost forgotten it was Christmas. But on the morrow it would be Christmas Eve and then the next day would be her wedding day.

  The question was, who would be her groom?

  She didn’t want to think about that, but she knew she must prepare for whatever lay before her. The morning would also bring the great tournament for which all the knights had been practicing. Noelle vowed to keep her mind on the joust. It would be colorful and diverting and there would be honor for whoever won.

  Nicholas stopped his destrier and held up his hand signaling the retinue to stop. Noelle and the rest of his company halted beside him.

  “I hope they saved us some food,” Dirk grumbled from behind her.

  “If I know our king, the food will be plenty,” Nicholas said. “Let us go and see what has been placed on the table.”

  When they entered the hall, the smell of roasted pork filled the air. Everyone was still seated laughing and talking as if they were in a festive mood.

  King Arthur spotted Nicholas the moment he and his party entered. Arthur rose and held up his golden chalice. “They return. Raise your cups in a toast to their successful siege.” Arthur paused and sipped his wine. “Now our tournament will be complete, for all my brave knights have returned. Come, Sir Nicholas and Sir Tristan, join the feast and replenish yourselves.”

  Nicholas leaned down to speak to Noelle. He hadn’t realized he’d been holding her hand which was hidden in the folds of her skirt. He let it go, and said in a low voice, “You should join your ladies, and I will seek King Arthur’s counsel after we eat.”

  “But I want to be with you,” Noelle protested in a whisper.

  “Do as you are told for once,” Nicholas said the irritation evident in his voice. When he straightened, he saw Sir Gavin approaching. This was exactly why Noelle couldn’t remain by his side, Nicholas reminded himself when he thought he might waver. Did she not see that he and Arthur would have to work out many things first?

  “I heard you have been very busy in my absence,” Sir Gavin said, then chuckled. “Thank you for looking out for my interests, Sir Nicholas. Are you both unharmed?”

  Noelle could feel the heat seep through her body, as well as the guilt. She hoped the guilt didn’t register on her face, for it would not do to have Gavin suspect. Then she wondered why she should feel guilty. She’d never loved Sir Gavin. She had never pretended that she did. But then, her feelings were not supposed to matter. What the king said was so, and by loving Nicholas, she had defied the king.

  She swallowed hard. What had she done?

  “Aye,” Nicholas said. “And how did you fare in the south?”

  Sir Gavin’s gaze shifted from Noelle to Nicholas. “We finally drove Meleagant’s men away, but there was no sign of Meleagant himself.”

  “Probably because I had the pleasure of doing battle with the cur at Cranborne,” Nicholas said in a disgruntled tone.

  “And what of Cranborne?” Sir Gavin asked Tristan, who’d just walked up to join them.

  “We will rebuild. Sir Nicholas has been indispensable in giving me suggestions on how to make the fortress stronger.”

  “Let us speak later,” Sir Gavin said. “You have been busy, and your journey long. You must be famished.” He gestured toward the heavily laden tables. “Come, let us partake of the feast.” He took Noelle’s elbow and escorted her to where he had been sitting. Tristan followed.

  Nicholas had to clench his jaw to keep from telling Sir Gavin to get his hands off Noelle. The next couple of days would be miserable until he and Arthur and Gavin settled their affairs. If it were possible to do so.

  Nicholas joined King Arthur at the dais and related to him all that had transpired. Though Nicholas ate, he tasted very little of his food. He had no desire to sit here and make idle conversation when he had more important matters to discuss with the king. He both longed for and dreaded what was to come. He just wanted to get it over with.

  Matilda appeared by Nicholas’s side and poured him another cup of mead. “I have saved some meat scraps for Boots,” she said, and placed a small leather pouch beside Nicholas’s trencher.

  “Thank you, Matilda. You have always looked out for us,” Nicholas said and then smiled at the kind, older woman.

  “You were not hurt?” she asked as she scanned his body, making certain for herself.

  “Nay. Lady Noelle’s brother John was killed, but Tristan and I were unharmed.”

  Matilda looked at Nicholas with compassion in her eyes. “I am sorry for your lady, but I am glad that you are unharmed,” she said in a whisper. Then she hurried off.

  His lady. Was it so obvious that Matilda could see his very thoughts in the depth of his eyes? And what was it about that old woman that he liked so much? It had seemed as though Matilda had been around from the time he was small until the family castle burned down, and then he’d lost touch with her until he’d come to Camelot.

  He liked the fact that Matilda really could handle King Arthur. And now Nicholas wished he had her skill as he prepared to deal with the king.

  “Sire,” Nicholas said to Arthur.

  Arthur nodded.

  “I would like to speak with you in private, at the Round Table,” Nicholas said.

  “You sound serious, Nicholas,” Arthur said with a frown. “Go, and I will join you
there anon.”

  Nicholas rose, bowed to the king and queen, and then strode out of the hall.

  Guinevere looked at her husband. “Something is troubling him.”

  “Aye.” Arthur nodded as he rose. “And I have a feeling I will not like it at all.”

  Noelle almost choked on a slice of meat. She hadn’t been able to keep her eyes off Nicholas, so she saw him speak to the king, then leave, and she knew exactly why he had gone.

  Her food no longer tasted good. What was going to happen? She had never been in this much trouble before, and she had no earthly idea how to handle the situation.

  Tristan reached over and put his hand on hers. She glanced at him and he said, “It will be all right. There is nothing you can do but pray.”

  That was the problem, Noelle wanted to shout. She felt so helpless. “Excuse me,” she said as she stood. “I must go to my chamber.”

  “Do you need our assistance, milady?” Isabelle asked.

  Noelle looked at Isabelle, who was sitting next to Dirk, and Carolyn, who sat next to Sir Gavin. Why deprive them of their fun? It was Noelle who had the problem, not her ladies. “Nay. It has been a long day for me. You may come later.”

  Noelle hurried from the hall. She needed to get away from everyone. What if King Arthur ordered Nicholas put to death? How would she bear it? No, she told herself fiercely. She would find some way to free Nicholas even if it meant disobeying the king.

  Having paid no attention to where she was going, she ran headlong into someone. “I am so sorry,” she said as she backed up—then she realized she had bumped into Merlin!

  “Where are you headed with such haste and with such a frown?” Merlin asked.

  “Oh, Merlin. I’m so afraid.”

  He reached down and took her hands in his gnarled ones. “What of, my child?”

  “Afraid that King Arthur will be so displeased with Sir Nicholas that he will do him harm.”

  “I see you have found the one.”

  Noelle managed a grim smile as she looked up at Merlin. “Aye,” she said, nodding. “Thank you. He is all that I dreamed of, but as you know I am promised to another who I want not. I cannot lose Nicholas after finally finding him.”

  “I told you that the path may not be easy, but if you trust the turns that you take, all will be well at journey’s end,” Merlin said and then released her hands. “Now, go and worry no more.”

  Noelle smiled at the wise old wizard. She felt a little better as she turned and headed for her solar. Perhaps a small prayer would help also.

  Nicholas arrived in the smaller hall first. He found his seat at the table and waited for the king. He glanced up at the roof overhead that had been painted to look like the sky, all light blues and fluffy clouds, and in the middle, the image of the sun shone down over the table.

  The room, no matter how glorious, was too quiet. Nicholas could swear that his very heartbeat echoed off the walls. He wanted to get this meeting over with.

  The door opened with a loud whoosh, and King Arthur swept in and headed for the Seat Royal. Nicholas watched silently and waited for the king to take his seat before he said, “You have won the wager, sire.”

  The king grinned. “So you have found it hard to abstain,” he said with satisfaction. “But I wonder that you have gone this long to fail now. Are you sure?”

  “Aye, sire. You have won the wager. I cannot lie to you.”

  “I saw you with no one at the castle. Was it someone at Cranborne? That was it, was it not?” Arthur shook his head, having answered his own question. “Such a shame, since you were only a few days away from triumph. And well I know how you would have savored another victory over me.”

  Nicholas did not blink as he stared at the king. “It is worse than that, sire.”

  King Arthur frowned. “I am sure I do not want to hear this, but I must. What have you done?”

  “I want to marry the Lady Noelle.”

  “What?” Arthur leapt to his feet and braced his hands on the table as he stared at Nicholas. “She is the one woman you cannot have. She is promised to another.”

  “How well I know, sire. But I love her,” Nicholas confessed the words still sounding strange to his own ears. And evidently incredibly strange to the king as well. “I will not give her up.”

  Arthur sank back slowly to his chair, his brows drawn together in a frown. “She has been promised to Sir Gavin. Or have you forgotten?”

  “Nay, I have not forgotten, though I did not think of Sir Gavin at the time,” Nicholas admitted.

  Arthur grimaced. “What happened to the boastful knight who told me women were of no use to him?”

  “It is what I believed for many a long year. But, as you well know, Lady Noelle is different from most women.”

  “Do you say that now, then later regret your words?”

  “Nay. She is unlike anyone I have ever met. Surely you must remember how you felt when you first met our queen. Would you give her up?” Nicholas countered.

  Arthur smiled and gave a slight nod. “I knew I had to have her,” he admitted. “Nay, I would not have given her up. Are you willing to fight for the lady?”

  “Aye.”

  Arthur rose and went to the door, where a servant stood waiting. “Go and bring Sir Gavin and Sir Tristan to me.”

  As the servant scurried off to do the king’s bidding, Arthur returned to his place. “I had forgotten how dull Camelot can be when you are not here, but it took you only a matter of hours to remind me.” He didn’t wait for Nicholas to answer, but went back to his chair.

  They said no more as they waited. Soon the other two knights arrived at the door, and the king motioned them in. He turned to the servant. “Stanley, go and fetch Lady Noelle. Have her wait outside the small hall until I summon her.” King Arthur gestured for Tristan and Gavin to sit.

  “What is wrong, sire?” Sir Gavin asked. “You look troubled.”

  “And well I am,” Arthur said, then looked to Nicholas. “Nicholas.” Arthur held his hand out.

  Surprised Nicholas stared at the king. Evidently, Arthur was going to let Nicholas do all the explaining. Nicholas wasn’t sure how to handle this situation, but talking in circles had never been his style. “I wish to marry Lady Noelle.”

  Of all the things to happen, Nicholas did not expect Sir Gavin’s reaction.

  Sir Gavin was laughing.

  “You cannot be serious,” Sir Gavin said as he tried to get his mirth under control. “You have never had a serious bone in your body where any lady is concerned. And to think you are serious about my intended—” He paused and chuckled. “Thank you for the jest.” Then Gavin sobered when he saw the serious expression on Nicholas’s face. “Wait. You are serious.” Sir Gavin came to his feet. “Noelle was promised to me! Now I see how you have been taking care of what is mine.”

  “Aye. But you do not love her,” Nicholas stated, trying hard not to raise his voice. A shouting match would only make everything worse.

  “And you proclaim to love her?” Gavin challenged archly.

  “Aye.”

  “By the saints, you just want that which is mine,” Sir Gavin roared, bristling with indignation. “I will not give her up easily. And when have you ever fought for a woman?”

  “There is always a first time.” Nicholas stood, his voice growing angrier. He’d finally lost the tight grip he’d held on his emotions as he said, “Cannot a man change?”

  “Nay,” Sir Gavin shot back, shouting at Nicholas. “Not where you are concerned.”

  King Arthur cleared his throat. “Silence! Cease your shouting and take your seats. I am not deaf, nor is anyone else at Camelot. Tristan, what say you in the matter?”

  Tristan had no desire to get in the middle of this, but it looked as though Noelle and Nicholas had created a very unusual situation. Christmas may never come to Camelot, he thought, but he was careful not to smile because no one else at the table would find anything amusing at the moment. “The last time I sp
oke to my sister, she didn’t want to marry anyone. The marriage to Sir Gavin was my brother’s doing. John is now dead so the matter falls to me. I want only that my sister be happy, and I can tell you that only she can choose the one that she truly loves. I think if neither man will give her up, then they must compete for her hand in the tournament. The winner can take her.”

  “I agree,” Arthur nodded. “That way no knight is shamed. I presume that you have not fallen in love with the Lady Noelle, Sir Gavin?”

  “Nay, I have hardly had the chance to be with the lovely lady,” Sir Gavin said with sarcasm. “It seems that Sir Nicholas spent much more time with my intended than I. However, she was promised to me.”

  Nicholas said nothing, nor did he bother to look guilty, Arthur noticed. “Do you both agree to abide by my rules?”

  They both nodded. “Aye, sire.”

  The king nodded and then told Tristan, “Bring in your sister.”

  Noelle stood outside the double doors wondering what was happening on the other side. Everything would work out—it would she reminded herself. She tried leaning closer to the door so she could hear what was being said but it was for nothing. The room was well constructed the thick walls blocking out all the noise.

  Unable to remain still, she began to pace back and forth in hopes of easing some of her nervousness. She had thought that finding love would be the answer to all her problems. But she’d been wrong; she had never dreamed that love would bring on yet another set of problems.

  The door swung open and Tristan beckoned her. “Come forth,” he said.

  “I had rather not,” Noelle admitted in a whisper.

  “The choice is not yours,” Tristan told her.

  Noelle swallowed gave her brother a desperate look, then swept past Tristan. When the door closed behind her, she remained just inside, unsure of where she should go. She wanted to run to Nicholas and throw her arms around him, but that would not do.

  “Come, Noelle,” King Arthur said and motioned for her to come and sit beside him. When she had done so, he said, “Sir Nicholas has asked for your hand in marriage.”