Dungeon Bringer 3

by Nick Harrow

  We’d made our way to the edge of the settlement. I wanted to look around for the upgrades I’d purchased yesterday. I’d thought there’d be some sweaty construction workers, piles of stone, maybe some carts loaded down with mortar.

  What I hadn’t expected was a whole goddamned wall around the settlement.

  “That’s a good question,” I replied to Kez. “I spent some build points yesterday to upgrade the city, but I hadn’t expected all this so soon.”

  A handful of construction workers were still in the area to put the finishing touches on the wall, and as soon as they noticed our approach all five of the men slapped a hand over their hearts, bowed deeply at the waist, then stood and shouted my name.

  "Relax," I said. "I'm just taking a look around. You finished this in a hurry."

  A tall bald man with a thick beard waxed to a sharp point stepped forward and bowed again.

  "We had hoped to finish sooner," he said. "There were problems with the foundation, moisture in the ground from the oasis, but it’s not bad for a month’s work."

  A month?

  I wanted to ask more questions, but I was afraid I would only get more confusing answers.

  "I'll let you get back to it then." I stepped away from the construction site with Kezakazek on my heels.

  "What do you make of that?" I asked her.

  "Well, they obviously haven't been working on this for a month if the oasis didn’t exist three days ago," the drow said with a wry chuckle. "And they've done far more work than would've been possible in the short time since we arrived. Whatever magic allows you to create dungeons and conjure settlements out of thin air is obviously powerful enough to fuck with time and space."

  "So, what? These construction workers are experiencing time differently than the rest of us? Doesn’t that confuse the shit out of their families?" I asked.

  "I don't know," Kezakazek said. "Let's ask them.

  She motioned toward another small knot of construction workers ahead of us. Kez opened her mouth to ask a question, then froze and tugged on my hand.

  “Okay, well, that’s weird.”

  The construction gang was the same group we’d just spoken to.

  Out of curiosity, I looked back over my shoulder in the direction from which we’d come.

  The men were back there, too, still hard at work on the wall.

  My head threatened to wobble right off my shoulders as the implications of what I’d just seen pinballed through my thoughts. If I rewrote reality, even a tiny little piece of it, every time I made a change to my dungeon or improved my settlement, I was a lot closer to a god than I’d imagined.

  And I wasn’t sure I liked it.

  “That's not possible," I said. Kezakazek grinned at me and shook her head.

  "What do you consider possible, Lord Rathokhetra?" she asked. "Gods that walk among us and carve dungeons from solid stone with a wave of their hand? Settlements that rise from the morning mist like a mirage made real? Or mysterious tax collectors from far-off lands who would've had to leave their homes weeks ago to arrive at a place that didn’t even exist a few days ago?"

  "Well, when you put it like that, I suppose I should expect flying purple unicorns and pigs that fart cotton candy at any moment, right?"

  "Mmmm, pigs. I miss bacon," she said. "We used to be able to import it, through the Nine Gates, but it's been so long..."

  "You will have bacon for dinner," I said with a smile. "Enjoy it."

  The drow let out a gusty sigh and curled her fingers in mine. She gave me a tug on the arm, and I followed her as she continued the circuit of the city. The drow was still aggravated with me, but the weird magical stuff I’d shown her and the promise of bacon had lowered her rage-o-meter from a solid eight down to a smoldering three.

  Small victories.

  Our trip across the north end of the settlement also unearthed a small school for scribes that I was one hundred percent sure had not been there the previous day. The school’s master, though, insisted that the Kahtsinka Scrivener’s Academy had been under his direction for several years.

  “Impossible,” Kezakazek said to me with a grin. “You’ve got a strange thing going on here, and I love it.”

  The Red Queen had told Alice she sometimes believed six impossible things before breakfast. That had always sounded like insane bullshit to me, but there I was with two impossibilities down and still quite a way to go before lunch.

  “Are there more shops around here than there were yesterday?” On our way back to City Hall after we’d investigated the murders, I couldn’t remember passing more than a handful of small shops that served food and one or two that specialized in rugs. But I’d already seen a small jeweler who specialized in copper medallions, a string of women with vegetable carts, and just ahead a blacksmith hammered away at a piece of hot iron like he’d caught it fucking his wife.

  “I wonder if there’s a bacon shop.” Kezakazek licked her lips.

  “We don’t need a bacon shop because I make the best bacon in the whole world,” I shot back. “An endless supply of bacon for the asking, and you want to find a butcher to make it the hard way?”

  “I like the hard way.” The drow suddenly stopped in front of me. She leaned up on her toes and planted a wet kiss on my lips. “Did I tell you how much I’m digging this bizarre shit? Fucking with the laws of reality is hot. So, so hot.”

  “I’m glad you find this so exciting.” The truth was, it was pretty neat, but it also messed with my head. It seemed like I could accomplish damned near anything, and the responsibility was real. What if the next time I spent build points something, or some people, were erased to make room for it?

  Rathokhetra’s smug chuckle made it clear he thought I was being a pussy about all this, so I let my worries go. My only job was to grow the settlement so I could advance my dungeon to keep my people safe. And no matter what else anyone tried to put on my plate, as long as I stuck to my job, I could rest easy at night.

  More or less.

  I’d just settled my conscience when we ran into my army.

  “Look at all those soldiers,” Kez whispered in awe.

  The south edge of the oasis had changed dramatically since I’d last come through here. A big chunk of the houses had been replaced by a flat, open space surrounded by a stone fence. A blocky gray building crouched on the west side of the open area, and a unit of soldiers with bronze lion helms and breastplates stood in drill formation in front of it. A sergeant bellowed at the men, who responded with shouts and a clatter of swords. There had to be a hundred men in that formation, and they did not look like newbies.

  “How much you want to bet that if I go down there and ask them how long they’ve been here, they’ll tell me it’s been months?” I asked Kez.

  “No bet.” She winked at me and nodded toward the unit. “But you should introduce yourself. Keep their morale up.”

  “Do I have to?”

  “Yes.” Kez swatted my ass. “Move it, dungeon lord.”

  With a sigh, I headed toward the open space. A small crowd of settlers had gathered around to watch the soldiers train, but they parted before me like long grass in a hurricane. I hopped the fence and strode across the parade ground with as casual a gait as I could manage. I did not want to spook a whole unit of trained sword fighters.

  “Hey.” I boosted my voice enough to carry across the ten yards between me and the sergeant but didn’t add any thunderboom special effects. I wanted the guy to notice me, not go deaf.

  The professional soldier turned around and shielded his eyes from the sun that had climbed toward its zenith during my tour of the city. His ornate lion helmet featured strips of tawny fur that dangled down its sides and back.

  “Have you come to be recruited?” he asked. “Because there is no other reason for a man to be on the militia’s training grounds.”

  “Not exactly.” I kept walking toward the guy, and soon his jaw dropped and his eyes went wide.

  “My lord,�
� he gasped and dropped to a knee. The rest of the soldiers followed suit. I wasn’t sure if that was because they’d seen me or simply because their boss had taken a knee.

  “Yeah, yeah.” When I reached the man, I tapped him on the shoulder. “Get up, it’s hard to talk to people when they’re on their knees like that. Makes me feel awkward.”

  “My apologies.” The sergeant scrambled to his feet and pulled his helmet off at the same time. The lion’s head had an impressive snarl, and I plucked it from his hands to get a better look.

  “Nice work,” I said. It really was, too. Someone had put some artistry into this bad boy, and it looked so lifelike I half expected the teeth that lined the open jaws to be sharpened to razor points. “Do you or your men need anything?”

  “My lord?” The sergeant seemed genuinely concerned that I gave a shit about him or his men. “I don’t understand.”

  “Do you have everything you need to defend the city?” I asked. “Are your weapons and armor sufficient?”

  “Yes, my lord. Your provisions are most generous, and our equipment is admirable.” The man puffed out his chest with pride, like he was just happy he got to kill people in my name.

  “Glad to hear it.” I pointed in the general direction of City Hall. “If you need anything, and I mean anything, you go to the hall and ask for me. We’ll get you what you need.”

  “Yes, my lord,” the sergeant shot back.

  “Dude, seriously,” I said with an exasperated sigh. “We’re on the verge of war with an invading army. Just tell me what I can do to help you.”

  “Thank you, my lord.” The man didn’t say another word after that. He stared off into the middle distance, sweat on his upper lip.

  “Cool.” I left them there and motioned for Kezakazek to walk around the parade ground to meet me on the other side. Hopefully the sergeant would actually tell me if he needed anything, but I wouldn’t accomplish anything else by freaking him out.

  Being a dungeon lord is fucking weird.

  By the time City Hall was in sight again Kezakazek's stomach rumbled and she licked her lips.

  “How about bacon for brunch instead of dinner?” she asked. “I’d like to get over to the fortress to do some more research.”

  “Your wish is my command,” I said. “Don't let it get out what a pushover I am for dark elves who don't wear many clothes.”

  “I wear plenty of clothes,” she said. “You just have a dirty mind.”

  “I won't deny that,” I said. She gave my hand a squeeze and offered me a small but heartfelt smile that let me know I'd escaped her shit list, at least for the moment. At the risk of jumping right back on the list, I reminded her of our deal. “Keep your eye on the prize, all right? I need you to find something in Kozerek’s papers that will give us an edge in this fight. You can do some work on your quest, too, but remember your priority.”

  “Keeping us all alive,” Kez said through a wide grin.

  As we started to climb the steps to the hall, a small group of villagers hoisted themselves up from their seats around a table set in front of what appeared to be a new tavern or bar across the street. They hustled toward me and raised their hands, mouths open to ask me some questions that I'm sure would've annoyed me. Before they could start, I raised a hand toward the villagers and shook my head.

  "Not today, kids. Office hours are two days from now, after noon.” I waited for them to acknowledge that I’d spoken before I continued. “Good. Now scram.”

  "But, Lord Rathokhetra." A particularly obstinate craftsman, some sort of hybrid elf-dwarf thing, started to cross the road like I hadn’t just told him to get the fuck out of there.

  I fixed him with a hard stare and pointed my finger directly at his forehead.

  His jaw snapped shut and his eyes narrowed, but he didn't say another word.

  "Two days, after noon," I said. "No sooner. Spread the word that I’ll smite anyone who shows up earlier than that."

  The villagers scattered like pigeons fleeing a hawk, and Kezakazek let out a wicked giggle.

  "Ooooh, you're so scary," she said. "Let's see about that bacon."

  I followed Kez as she scampered up the steps and chased her through City Hall's front door. If I'd been incarnated, I would've tripped right over the little rug rat who'd parked herself in the audience chamber.

  She let out a little yelp when my leg passed through her and shivered. The girl clasped a doll that looked like it was supposed to be either a very hairy elf or a very bald wahket to her chest and beamed up at me.

  "I get to live here now," she said. "That'll be fun."

  Kezakazek snickered at me from across the room.

  "Oh, yes," she said. "That will be a treat."

  “Come on, kid,” I said. “Let’s get some food.”

  “Can we have zalabya for dessert?” the little girl asked as she scrambled to catch up to me. “I love zalabya.”

  “Sure,” I said. “Whatever you want.”

  I had no idea what a zalabya was, but I’d figure it out. The little girl had had a shitty day, and the least I could do was make her something sweet to help soothe her pain.

  Chapter 6 – The Hunt

  TURNED OUT ZALABYA were just little donut holes, and my memory of Dunkin was still fresh enough for me to churn out some baller munchkins. Izel’s eyes went wide as she stuffed her belly with flavors she’d never experienced. I’d made blueberry, strawberry, chocolate, and even pumpkin spice zalabya after brunch, and she wolfed them down like they were the best things she’d ever eaten.

  The wahket and Kezakazek had chowed down on strips of perfectly seared Wagyu steak and several pigs’ worth of bacon, drank flagons of the finest wine, and downed shots of Gentleman Jack while I enjoyed the meal vicariously from the head of the table. I couldn’t eat or drink any of the food or booze, but I’d definitely appreciated the sight of almost three dozen gorgeous and deadly women feasting on what I’d provided for them.

  Kez left right after brunch but promised that she’d be back every night to fill me in on what she’d found and have dinner with the rest of the guardians. She was still intent on finding the people who’d fucked over her family, but I was more confident she could do it without running herself into the ground.

  While the wahket cleared away our brunch, Nephket leaned across the table and crooked a finger in my direction.

  “I saw your wall,” she said. “Very impressive. How’d you do it?”

  “It’s a dungeon lord thing.” I cupped my hands behind my head. “I don’t think you’d understand.”

  My priestess vaulted across the table and landed in my lap. Her hands locked on either side of my face and held me in place while she laid a deep kiss on me. Her eyes caught the light of the noon sun through the window and glowed like gemstones.

  “I understand more than you think,” she purred and spun around to sit on my lap. “Show me.”

  “So bossy.” I summoned the Tablet of Conquest and let it float in the air before us. “Let’s see what we have here.”

  <<<>>>

  The Tablet of Conquest

  First Settlement

  The Kahtsinka Oasis (1st-Level Settlement)

  Current Status: Weak

  Improvements

  Martial: 1

  Defenses: 1

  Agrarian: 1

  Education: 1

  Religion: 0

  Mercantile: 1

  Build Points: 0

  Current Build Point Cost: 500 gold pieces

  Maximum Build Points: 5

  Build Points to Next Settlement Level: 5

  Invested Build Points: 5

  <<<>>>

  “Looks like things have gotten more expensive,” Nephket said. “Weren’t these build points only a hundred gold pieces last time?”

  While I hated the fact that the cost had jumped so much, I’d expected it. I’d played a lot of strategy games during my time, and cost bumps were just part of the advancement path. This batch of points would c
ost me twenty-five hundred gold pieces, which still left me with nine grand in the Bank of Rathokhetra. As long as the price of build points didn’t quintuple again, I’d be able to manage.

  “Yep, it’s a little spendy,” I said. “Good thing your boyfriend is loaded. Any suggestions on what I should spend my filthy lucre on?”

  “Soldiers,” Neph said. “Buy another martial upgrade. Buy all the martial upgrades, for that matter.”

  “That’s tempting.” It made sense to just buy up a bunch of dudes and throw them at Lexios, but it also felt like a trap. If I earned a hundred soldiers for every martial upgrade, I could match my enemy’s forces with ten points. That seemed like a bargain, but there were more costs to consider than just gold. “But how will we feed them? And if we have a couple of hundred soldiers and thirty villagers, things are going to get out of hand soon.”

  “I see your point.” Nephket leaned back against me and caressed the side of my face with her left hand. “It is a shame because we do need those soldiers.”

  “We can get them, but we need to balance everything out,” I said. “Let’s try a little different distribution this time and see how it works.”

  With a quick tap of my finger, I spent twenty-five hundred gold pieces on five more build points. I invested the first point on a Defensive upgrade, and a red-bordered message floated into view.

  <<<>>>

  Modifier adjustments: Dex +1, Int -1

  <<<>>>

  “That’s weird.” I checked the settlement stats but didn’t see Dex or Int there. “I wonder what modifiers this adjusts?”

  “No idea.” Nephket shrugged. “You’re way past what I know about the dungeon lord business now. Were they big adjustments?”

  “Nope, just minor stuff.” I tapped the tablet to buy an Agrarian upgrade. “There it is again.”

  <<<>>>

  Modifier adjustments: Con +1, Wis -1

  <<<>>>

  I’d seen enough character sheets in D&D games and enough information from my dungeon lord vision to make sense of the modifier names at least. Growth bumped the Constitution and Wisdom of someone—or something—up and down, respectively. Defensive had fiddled with the Dexterity and Intellect of the unknown someone or something. But I still didn’t understand just who or what I was changing.