Shadow and Ice (Gods of War)

by Gena Showalter

  “Hello, Vale.”

  Tasting citrus, she dropped her phone and spun. Her heartbeat careened out of rhythm as she lifted her sword. Her gaze landed on the big, dark-haired warrior with equally dark eyes, and a cold sweat broke out over her skin.

  “Zion. What are you doing here?”

  “He’s with me.”

  Vale encountered the beloved flavor of warm brown butter. “Nola?”

  A sickly Nola stepped out from behind the warrior, offered her a wobbly smile and collapsed.

  Eleven minutes earlier

  KNOX RACED ALONG a lavish countryside filled with wide-open spaces, beautiful trees and grazing herds, closing in on the nearest town while creating a trail to the cottage. When his pocket vibrated, he frowned. Then he remembered the cell phone Vale had given him.

  He checked the screen.

  Vale: Land mines are hidden in the lavender field, controlled by a remote I CAN activate. Anyone can. Be careful on your return, okay? XOXO

  He typed: Qhat dies XOXP meab.

  His fingers were too big for the keyboard, and he misspelled everything, yet the phone automatically corrected two of the words, attempting a guess about his meaning. What dies XOXP mean?

  Incorrect, but he pressed Send, anyway, certain he’d mess up worse if he tried to fix it. He hoped Vale understood.

  Her response appeared on the screen mere seconds later.

  Kisses and hugs

  He almost smiled.

  Throughout his life, Knox had hungered for freedom and vengeance the way other men hungered for riches. Then he’d met Vale, and she’d somehow upended his world. The man who had once forsaken romantic ties couldn’t abide the idea of being without his woman, even for a few hours.

  {Must take her out. Cannot allow such a dangerous combatant to live.}

  Understand me, eyaer. I will not be taking her out right now. I’m not sure I will ever be able to take her out. The need to protect her was too strong—and only growing stronger—practically programmed into his DNA.

  Knox would instruct Vale to chain him up if Ansel ever followed through with his threat. While he’d never had the power to disobey a direct order, he’d resisted for a minute or two. Just enough time for her to disarm and bind him.

  Willingly submit to captivity? Yes. For the first time, yes. For Vale, he thought he would do anything. The same way she would do anything for him.

  Hurry. Finish this, and return to her. The countryside tapered into a cityscape, fields replaced by paved streets. Two-and three-story structures loomed on each side, few gaps and alleyways between them.

  Hidden in shadows, Knox slowed and, following Vale’s instructions, ran a dagger across his palm. As blood welled, he smeared it across his face and neck.

  The stage was set.

  Shifting his shadows so that only his weapons were concealed, he made sure to stumble around, bumping into people. Some asked if he was all right, but he offered no response.

  A necklace glittered in a store window, beckoning Knox. How lovely the piece would look on Vale. Twelve stones, each a different color. One was green, one gold, a perfect match for her eyes.

  Had a male ever given her such a present, or would Knox be the first? He imagined her face lighting up... fantasized about making love to her while she wore the gemstones, a smile and nothing else...

  I want. I take.

  No! She’d told him to steal something, yet the most primitive part of him demanded he buy this for her. I want. I...earn. Sometimes, a gift that cost you nothing meant nothing. The more he spent, the more she might understand her value to him.

  He delivered a single punch to the window, using all of his might. Bones cracked and skin tore. Worth it. Glass shattered. An alarm screeched to life as broken shards rained over his boots.

  Oh, yes. Erik would hear of this.

  Hand bloody, Knox reached through the jagged opening and grabbed the necklace, then tossed one of his prized daggers into the store. Payment rendered.

  Vale’s value—priceless.

  The eyaer screamed in protest, louder than the alarm, but he ignored it.

  People congregated around him. Time to go. Knox took off in a sprint, summoning more and more shadows around him, soon vanishing from view.

  He dropped the necklace in his pocket, and withdrew the phone, then typed as he ran. Like before, his mistakes were corrected.

  My work is done. Heading your way.

  He waited, but no response came in. The foreboding he’d experienced earlier surged anew, and he fired off another text.

  Talk to me. Tell me all is well.

  Waiting...

  Still no response.

  {Trouble lurks. Proceed with caution.}

  Caution was no longer part of his skill set. Knox quickened his pace. Should he rift directly into the cottage?

  No. He didn’t want to lead anyone else directly inside it.

  What about the lavender field?

  No, again. He’d have to wait for the rift to close. He could reach her faster on foot. The cottage came into view. Curtains were drawn over the windows, preventing him from peering inside.

  If something had happened to Vale...

  Keep your wits. An outcome had never been so important. He palmed the revolver and a dagger, his grip unsteady, and inspected the field. Nothing appeared amiss, but he skirted the edge, anyway, just to be safe.

  He couldn’t lose Vale. He just...couldn’t.

  She’d brought him back to life one smile, taunt and caress at a time. For centuries, he’d clung to his solitary existence, enveloped by his shadows, unable, no, unwilling to fight his way out of the darkness. Then she’d shown him the beauty of light, and forever changed the course of his life.

  He wasn’t Knox of Iviland; he was Knox, Vale’s man. He couldn’t—wouldn’t—lose her.

  He blazed up the porch, burst through the door... and ground to a halt. Though his feet had stopped moving, his heart continued to race. Confusion muddled his thoughts as he struggled to make sense of what he was seeing.

  In the living room, Vale sat on a couch—next to her sister. Nola was pale, thin and shaky, nothing like the upbeat girl he’d seen in the ice cavern. The sisters were holding hands and talking in hushed voices, giddy.

  The reunion had a single flaw. Zion stood a few feet away, aiming a rifle at Knox’s chest.

  The warrior grinned without humor. “Glad you could join us, Knox. We have much to discuss.”

  Vale had...betrayed him? Had consorted with the enemy behind his back, choosing to work with Zion, and ambush Knox?

  He knew her, knew she wouldn’t do this. But the evidence stood mere feet away.

  Feeling as if he’d just been flayed alive, Knox stumbled backward. This wasn’t...this couldn’t... A roar burst from him, the pain too much to hold inside.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

  HOW QUICKLY LIFE could change, for better or worse.

  One moment Vale was immersed in an emotional cocoon, concerned about Nola’s declining health, but over the moon happy to be together again, savoring the taste of warm brown butter. The next she was positioning herself between two rabid beasts, feeling like the only rib eye at a discounted all-you-can-eat buffet.

  “Guys. Please,” she said, holding out her arms, as if such a puny action could stop either one of these hulks. “Talk first, kill later. If we’re all alive, we’ve got options.”

  Dried blood smeared Knox’s face, the crimson stark against his now-ashen features. So badly she wanted to wrap her arms around him and explain the situation, but she held her tongue. Harsh betrayal gleamed in his eyes. He might not believe her. Plus, he was a god of war with a god of war’s pride. The odds of her saying something she shouldn’t in front of witnesses were pretty high.

  Nola trudged to her feet and clasped Zio
n’s arm. She was in the middle of a flare and opioid withdrawals, her body racked with pain. Lack of sleep had left bruises under her eyes, and her cheeks had hollowed from days of vomiting.

  Vale had no idea how to help her sister, and it sucked. If Nola entered the All War, she would become immortal, just like Vale, and her pain and suffering would end...but she would be hunted and forced to kill others. No good options.

  Already the AW had screwed with Nola’s life. Apparently Bane had kidnapped her from Zion multiple times—who’d ultimately kidnapped her right back. Beast-man believed he and Nola “belonged together.”

  Nola might agree. She’d blushed while she’d talked about it.

  Vale had a trillion unanswered questions. The highlights? What happened the night the ice prison collapsed? Where, exactly, had Nola been all this time? Besides getting kidnapped, what had she been doing? Was she attracted to Zion, too? How badly was she attracted to Bane? Had anyone hurt her, and how viciously did she want Vale to hurt them back?

  Scowling at Zion with the ferocity of a bear cub, the weakened Nola said, “If you hurt my sister’s boyfriend, I will be supremely displeased.”

  “For once, I’m willing to risk it.” Zion turned his attention to Knox. “Whatever you cut me with after the assembly left a wound on my leg that hasn’t healed. I am not amused.”

  Still, the big bad male lowered the gun, leaving Vale flabbergasted. She’d watched him punch through another man’s chest, and now little Nola Lee’s temper intimidated him?

  “Sit, mortal, and do not get up again.” Zion gave Nola a gentle push toward the couch. “And if you ever approach an angry combatant again, or get in the middle of an impending fight, I will... I’ll...”

  Nola blew him a kiss with bite and resettled on the couch.

  Earlier, Zion had limped to the kitchen to fetch her a glass of water—the wound Knox had given him truly hadn’t healed. Vale had asked her sister straight up, “Are you guys sleeping together?”

  “No,” Nola had replied. “He’s like my adopted brother. Which I could really get into, maybe, probably, but he’s afraid he’ll break me, and that’s a hard limit for me.”

  Vale shared Zion’s fear. He could break the fragile girl with a twist of his wrist.

  In the present, Knox glared at Zion—his pistol remained aimed and ready. “Did you contact him, Vale?”

  Oh, how galling! He thought so little of her integrity, so little of her loyalty that he automatically assumed the worst. “Hey, remember when you didn’t die at check-in? Yeah, that was because of me and Zion.”

  He refused to bend. “Remember when you didn’t die at check-in? That was because of me.”

  “I didn’t contact him,” she said, pushing the words through gnashing teeth. “He tagged me with one of Colt’s bots.” She’d found the bugger under her skin, in one of the places she’d been stabbed during the battle. It must have burrowed through the gash and stayed put when she’d healed. “I would never betray you.”

  A slight softening around his eyes, but it didn’t last. “Through you, he has learned the location of my bunker.”

  “But he didn’t take advantage,” she said in a small voice.

  “What’s worse,” he continued, “you didn’t text me to alert me of another combatant’s presence, as you swore you would. Nor did you run, as ordered.”

  An-n-nd her indignation was back. “First, I’m not your slave, and I don’t do as I’m told,” she snapped, causing him to blanch. “Second, I was only supposed to run if I was about to die. Third, I didn’t text you because I got caught up in the moment. Nola fainted and needed me. They’ve only been here a few minutes. Just...give Zion a chance. Please. For me. For us. He’s here to help with our Erik problem. Help we desperately need.”

  Knox didn’t say a word, but the rigidness of his posture screamed all kinds of obscenities at her.

  “Give Zion a chance,” she repeated.

  “My instinct tells me trouble brews. I can’t—I won’t work with him.” He glared. “You won’t, either.”

  She understood his reasoning, but resented his demand. Hackles raised, she said, “How about you stop telling me what I can and can’t do? And maybe trust your girlfriend more than your stupid instinct.”

  “That stupid instinct has never failed me.”

  “And I have?”

  The glare intensified. “I only want to protect you, valina.”

  Her already-fragile calm shattered. This set a terrible precedent. Knox right, Vale wrong. Knox strong, Vale weak. Knox head, Vale tail.

  “Look,” she said, “you want to protect me because I’m necessary for your victory. I get it. But—”

  “You aren’t necessary,” he interjected. “Not to the eyaer, not anymore. Not since the hour before the assembly.”

  “Um, what’s that now?” She’d stopped being necessary, and he’d stayed with her, anyway? Another plot twist. “Never mind. We’ll discuss it later. Just...stand down and trust me. I won’t do anything to risk your life, or my sister’s or my chance at victory. Or even your chance at victory. And I realize how contradictory I’m being, but I want us all to survive this.”

  “Wait.” Nola flattened her hands over her stomach. “You’re a soldier in their war? How can that be?”

  Okay, so she hadn’t yet dropped that particular bombshell, hadn’t wanted her sister worried. And it was clear Zion hadn’t, either.

  “I am, yes,” she said, remaining fixated on Knox, the love of her life.

  Oh, frick. Vale wasn’t just falling for the man. She’d already hit the ground and splattered on the sidewalk.

  She loved him deeply, madly, wholly, nothing held back. Timing didn’t matter to emotion. The swiftness of the relationship didn’t matter. He had her heart, and she had a no-return policy.

  There had to be a way to have it all, the alternative too wretched. She refused to settle for anything less than happily-ever-after.

  “Please, trust me,” she pleaded. “I want us to be together, as a family, not just surviving, but thriving.”

  He flinched at the word family, as if sucker punched by a startling realization. He softened completely, his anger just...gone. As he looked between her and Nola, he was suddenly stripped of his civility.

  He nodded as if he’d just made a life-altering decision that devastated him, his features heartbreaking and heartbroken all at once. Dread shivered down her spine.

  Tone gentle, he said, “My truce with you stands, Valerina of Earth. Now and always. But I won’t be fighting at your side. Today, we part ways, and I take out combatants from the shadows, where I belong.”

  Part ways? Gutted by the thought, she gave an adamant shake of her head. “Are you trying to make me choose between you and Nola?” Her eyes burned with tears she refused to shed, and her chin trembled. Losing sight of the others—who watched the exchange with budding trepidation—she swallowed the lump in her throat; it settled in her stomach, fizzing, agonizing her further. “Please, don’t do this. We can succeed, together. Remember?”

  “I don’t want you to choose,” he said, still so gentle. “Earlier, you believed we’d be better off apart, but I convinced you otherwise. I was wrong to do so.”

  “No! You were right. We save each other.” She wanted to shout, I love you, and love conquers all, even evil. Love is everything. Love is worth fighting for. I am worth fighting for. Love never fails—but you are going to fail our love if you walk away.

  She pressed her tongue to the roof of her mouth and remained silent. No way she would use her feelings to manipulate or pressure him. And yeah, okay, she realized she had no right to censure him, either. She’d wanted to ditch him before, and not because of the game but because she’d hoped to avoid this. The moment he realized he was better off without her.

  Always be the leaver.

  For once, she hadn�
��t wanted to be the leaver. No wonder he’d convinced her to stay so easily; she’d latched on to any excuse. In her heart of hearts, she knew he was brave and strong, nothing like her selfish father.

  “I expected better from you,” she whispered. Do not sob. “You’re a coward.”

  “I’m a man, doing the best I can in a hopeless situation. Because we can’t save each other,” he said, destroying her world piece by piece. He breathed deep, exhaled with force, lowered his gun and faced Zion. “I’m going to ensure Vale reaches the final two. As long as you’re guarding her, I won’t target you. If you try to stop me, or hurt her in any way, I will make your death a cautionary tale, and even Seven will shudder with revulsion.”

  “Agreed,” Zion said.

  “Stop this.” Do. Not. Sob. “No one’s leaving anyone. What is it about stronger together that you don’t understand? A twofold cord cannot be broken.”

  Knox bowed his head. “I’m sorry, Vale.”

  “No,” she repeated, vision blurring as she blinked back those stupid, stupid tears. “If you walk out the door, we’re done. I won’t take you back, even if you crawl.”

  But he wouldn’t come back. They never did.

  “I know you won’t.” Knox took two steps back, spun on his heel and fled. Before he vanished around the corner, she caught a final glimpse at his expression.

  Never had a man exuded such wretchedness.

  Then he was gone, and she thought he might have left his own shredded heart behind.

  * * *

  ENCOMPASSED BY SHADOWS, Knox marched along the perimeter of the lavender field, avoiding the land mines while dodging trees. He kept the cottage in sight, straying just far enough to detect if a combatant neared.

  Leaving Vale with Zion had been the most difficult thing he’d ever done. But difficult didn’t mean wrong. He knew he’d made the right decision. For her. For them both. Still. His grip tightened on his daggers as the dreadful ache in his chest amplified.

  Vale hadn’t betrayed him, and he never should have doubted her. She was loyal to Nola, yes, but she was also loyal to him. Or rather, she had been. He’d destroyed whatever feeling she’d had for him.