by LJ Swallow
I cry out as something throws me from Ash's mind into my own, the force on my body knocking me from my hiding place. Tobias whips his head around and frowns as I steady myself on the wall.
"Maeve?"
Vincent takes advantage of the distraction and edges around Tobias, ensuring they don't touch. The coward might not run, but he strides away from the scene and doesn't look back. Ash slumps back against the wall, breathing heavily.
"Ash?" I rush forward to touch him. "How badly hurt are you?"
He continues to shake his head, one eye swollen from the assault, muttering to himself words I can't catch.
"Explain to me what's happening." Tobias glances at the retreating Vincent and swears.
I place a hand on Ash's shoulder, and I'm mid-way through explaining events of the last few minutes when Ash drops to the floor. He lands on his backside, hitting the side of his head with both palms. "No. No. No."
I exchange alarmed glances with Tobias as Ash wraps his arms around his knees and draws them to his chest, continuing to repeat "no."
"Did Vincent make him shift?" asks Tobias quietly.
"No. I was... in him. I stopped Ash, but Clive and Remi… I think they may've started shifting before Vincent arrived."
Tobias swipes a hand across his hair and looks in the direction Vincent went. "Theodora needs to listen to me when I tell her what's happening with that man. She's too distracted by Confederacy affairs and she needs to pull herself together."
"What's happening?"
Tobias shakes his head. "The shitstorm surrounding Lorna's death grows daily. She wants to play things down."
Ash groans and hits the side of his head harder. My heart fills with dread—what if I'm the one who hurt him? "Ash." I crouch down beside Ash and curl my fingers over his hand to stop him hurting himself. "What's happening?"
Relief pours through me when he looks up at me through Ash's eyes—not the reptilian I've seen before, but the wildness in them frightens me.
"I know." He closes his eyes again. "I know, Maeve."
Tobias squats down beside us. "You know what, Ash? Who Vincent is?"
His hopeful expression disappears when Ash shakes his head and grips my hand with a force I think might break my fingers. "No. But I know what I saw that night. We have to stop him."
Chapter Fifty
MAEVE
Ash repeats his story for a third time, eyes flicking from left to right as he relives the events, and I sit beside him with my hand on his thigh. His cheek and eye are badly bruised, but the hollowness in his eyes is the worst thing about him.
Tobias stands in the corner of his office, leaving the chairs free for us. He's back to the inscrutable guy again, blocking his mind from everybody, including me.
Andrei stands close to the door, chewing on a thumbnail as he listens, and Jamie sits with a notepad on his lap and scribbles notes. I'd laugh at him, but writing events down is good idea. Jamie was late to the scene again, and I sensed his disappointment, recalling his words that he's never there when needed. He arrived as Tobias and me tried to calm Ash enough to get something coherent from him.
Andrei had to be fetched from Petrescu for the meeting and I study his eyes for drugged effects. Is he still sulking after our argument?
Now we're all in our closest safe place. Tobias's office.
For the third time, we're stunned, filled with questions impossible to find an answer to.
"I think we have the timeline straight now," says Jamie almost inaudibly. "What do we do? Go to Theodora?"
"I'm wary of allowing anybody else to know what happened tonight," says Tobias.
"Others will know already," says Ash. "Ed and Tom will tell people."
"More fuel to the fire," mutters Jamie.
Tobias sits on the edge of his desk and scratches a cheek. "Vincent's behaviour is increasingly erratic and not all students support him. Theodora is likely to challenge him about his students' assaulting others, which will put him under a closer scrutiny, which he won't like."
"What do you think Vincent's next move will be?" I ask.
Tobias shrugs. "Often, watch and wait is a good idea, but I believe we need to act. This incident was outside his control and he's becoming more unpredictable. One advantage is he doesn't know exactly how much we saw or heard."
"I want to go up to the farmhouse," Ash announces.
I jump in my skin. "That's not a good idea, Ash."
"What if people are still locked in that barn?" he says, and rubs a hand across his hair. "I can't leave this until I know."
"As far as we're aware, Vince doesn't go there often," says Jamie. "He's busy policing his recruits here."
"Who said that only Vince is involved?" Ash snaps. "He's not doing this shit alone. The people I saw in the woods…"
The ones he can barely recollect—the man and woman who concern Tobias the most. Ash can't remember if the pair spoke, and didn't see their faces, leaving a frustrated Tobias with no clues to their identity.
"Yes. I think we need to consider the place is used regularly and people could be imprisoned there," says Tobias softly.
I'm glad I never tapped into Ash's memories or saw those people's faces and sensed their terror. I can't bear to think what happened to them on the ‘hunt'.
"Do you think Clive and Remi joined the shifters' hunt?" I ask.
Ash stares at his shoes. "They were with me when I refused. Vince chose students who've personal links to shifters killed by hunters. They're easier to manipulate."
"And the pair aren't the brightest," says Jamie harshly. "Typical bone-headed shifters."
"I told you they hid something," Ash says and gestures around. "They want to shift early, but they know the risks. I swear I saw something in their faces tonight."
"I think I did too," I say quietly.
"I'm wary," says Tobias. "I'd like to look into the place, but if anybody has the slightest inkling we're going, we could face danger."
"We're always in danger," Andrei says. "At least this time we'd be prepared to face whatever's thrown at us. Better than a surprise attack."
Tobias nods. "Vincent will be nervous now. We've witnessed and heard things we shouldn't. I don't think there's much time before he leaves or puts whatever plan he has into action."
"Then we go up there," says Ash firmly. He catches my horrified look. "Come on, Maeve. Between us, we're powerful. Isn't it time we believed that?"
Powerful? Yes. But invincible? I look to where the chain to the Blackwood pendant is visible as Jamie leans forward, tapping the pen on his teeth. No. Not invincible. Even with magic.
I look wildly between the others. "This is dangerous."
"Like Andrei said, everywhere is dangerous for us," says Jamie quietly.
"You agree?" I ask in horror. "Why? Because you think you'll be safe with that." I jab a finger at his chest.
"Safer," he snaps back.
"I suggest we watch Vince," says Tobias. "I don't think he's about to run yet, but he may bring his plans forward. I also think he'll be watching us now—or have his followers doing so. We can't be seen together plotting. We carry on as normal."
I gape at him. "Normal? How can you expect Ash to walk back into Gilgamesh? He could be in danger."
"I can protect myself," mutters Ash.
"Two nights," says Tobias. "I understand your urge to go straight up there, but we stay away until the dust settles around Vincent and Ash."
"I'll go back to Gilgamesh and kowtow to the arsehole. If this is only a day or two, I can cope with not seeing you all." Ash squeezes my hand. "I doubt Vince will tell me what plans he has, but at least I can watch closely."
"He's not stupid," I say. "He'll know you're watching."
"I think this is the best course of action," says Tobias softly. "He doesn't know that you've remembered and would expect you to keep away or inform somebody if you had. Normal is good."
I slump back, palm sweating against Ash's. "Two nights from now?"
<
br /> Jamie frowns. "Isn't that giving Vince too much time?"
"Or time for us to see what his next move is after tonight," says Tobias.
"Will you tell Theodora?" I ask.
Tobias sighs deeply. "Not this time."
"Don't you trust her?" asks Jamie, aghast. "Surely you don't think she's working with Dominion."
"I'd lay bets on Sofia," I mutter. Jamie regards me with shock. "Oh, come on. She's behaving oddly."
"She's jealous of your powers," he retorts. "That's all."
"I don't want the slightest whisper about our plans. Not to anybody," Tobias says. "We're looking for clues, not people, otherwise we'd follow Vincent next time he left the academy."
"I'll tell you if he does," says Ash and stands. "I'm tired." He leans down to kiss me hard on the mouth. "Later, guys."
I blink in surprise at his abrupt halt to the conversation, and the room quiets. Ash steps outside the door, ready to turn away from us— again.
I'm in awe of the strength Ash has to be able to walk back into the situation with Vincent and isolate himself from us again. But I can't let him walk away alone.
"Sorry," I mumble to the others and follow him through the door. The hallway is dark but I can see his figure retreating.
"Ash!" I call. He stops and I hurry to catch up to him.
He frowns down at me. "What's wrong?"
"I'm sorry for invading your head," I say.
He shakes his head before kissing my nose. "S'okay. You helped unblock my memories."
"Without a nosebleed this time," I say with a wry smile.
Or me dying. I'm reassured that I can still use my powers without risking death, but I partly wish I'd been the one to see Ash's memories, not him. The haunted look he's carried since we walked to Tobias's office has intensified.
"I'm happier now I know I didn't shift that night. I think I started to, when..." He trails off. When Vincent said things Ash refuses to share with us.
"We'll find the evidence we need against Vincent and he'll pay for this."
"He's not Vincent."
His words add an extra layer of sadness to the guy in front of me. I remember the same sadness the day he told me about his brother's death, and witnessed his euphoria once Vincent returned and settled into his family.
This guy is the strongest person I know.
I tiptoe to place my mouth on his, holding still as he wraps his arms around me. I'll worry every minute I'm estranged from Ash, because nobody can predict how Vincent will react to Ash now.
"I hate to think about you alone," I whisper. "Please call and let me know you're safe. It's tough when I don't see you and don't know what's happening."
"Of course, Maeve." Ash rests his head on mine. "Last time I stayed away because Vincent forced me to, I realised something important. There's a reason Vincent could never keep me away from you, however much he threatened me or tried to control what I do."
He looks at me the way he did outside the dance in the snow, the dullness in his eyes briefly replaced by a spark of happiness. His large palm cups my face, rough thumb pad brushing my lips. "Because I love you, Maeve."
His words send tears to my eyes as they rip away the bandage I've had over my emotions for days. They're simple, common words used by people every day, but to hear them from Ash with such simple truth means more. "I hope you know how much I love you," I reply. "My heart hurts so badly for what you've been through and I'll do anything to help."
"Then why am I making you cry?" He purses his lips and brushes a thumb on my cheek to catch a tear.
"I don't know," I say, choking out a laugh. "I'm happy and scared and sad all at once."
"Why? Because of how I feel?"
"No. Because of all this." I gesture around me. "Everything around us."
Ash rubs a palm down his cheek. "Sorry I was shit last term and turned away from you."
"Don't be silly, Ash. We're all facing tough times. You were struggling and lost; I know how that feels. The future is what matters now."
"The things he said he'd do," blurts Ash. "To you. Vince knows how to trigger me. Promise to help if he does that again—I don't care if that means you need to be in my head. I can't shift. I can't."
Ash's gentle nature holds a deeper, darker side—I'm aware of that, but am I enough to stop him? I can't bear to think half-shifting could change Ash into a Mid and effectively end his life. A guy who'd lose his future and place in society.
I tiptoe to silence him with my lips on his. The kiss we share is soft and brief, but with the love we spoke about adding an extra tenderness. I want to ask Ash not to walk back into his personal hell, but know I'd waste my breath.
"Don't kiss me like you'll never kiss me again," I whisper.
"I'm kissing you so I can remember every detail, then I can keep you with me even when you're not there." He strokes my hair. "You can give me the strength I need."
"You already have that strength inside you, Ash. You've proved that."
He smiles but with doubt in his eyes. "I have to go, because…." Vincent. "I'll see you soon."
Swallowing hard, I nod. As he steps away, Ash's hand remains in mine, our arms stretching until we're only holding fingers, and then we let go at the last second.
"I'll see you soon," I whisper to myself.
Please let him be safe.
Chapter Fifty-One
MAEVE
Over the next couple of days, Jamie spends more time in the library. At first, I believed his story that he's catching up on missed assignments. Now, I'm unsure since he's barely around us. I'm behind on work too and head to the library on the second afternoon.
I nod at the librarian behind the oak desk. He nods in return, peering at me through small eyes beneath bushy eyebrows as I walk by. I'm uncomfortable—I come here enough for him to recognise me.
Jamie's usual study spot is a corner desk, between two large bookshelves that span the width of the room. His space is towards the rear of the library, and somewhere he won't be disturbed. I walk around the corner, ready to greet him with a smile and hug, but the seat is empty.
I purse my lips and shrug my bag onto a shoulder. Did Jamie lie about visiting the library? He wouldn't lie to me, would he? Flopping onto his chair, I pick at the wood with my fingernails. This secrecy could involve Amelia—maybe Jamie knows where she is.
Chewing on my lip, I weigh up what to do. I could actually study now I'm here, but my stomach is queasy at my discovery. April, the other witch who's almost part of the library furniture walks by to inspect a shelf nearby. I rest back in my chair continuing my indecision as I watch the short girl climbing small steps to reach a book on a high shelf. Amelia had the same problem. I smile, but this is another reminder that she isn't here hits my heart.
April pauses as she passes the table and looks back at me. "Are you looking for Jamie?"
"Do you know where he is?" I straighten.
"In the sanctum, probably."
"Oh. Right. Thanks." I hide my confusion; why didn't Jamie admit that's where he goes?
"He's spent a lot of time down there the last two days." She smiles at me.
Uh. Does April track Jamie's moves? Suspicion instantly rises and then I sigh inwardly. I can't suspect everybody.
April heads away, and I glance in the direction of the witches sanctum doorway. If Jamie hasn't anything to hide, there's no issue with me looking for him.
The first time I walked down the steps to this secretive part of the academy, the cool, dark hallway made my scalp crawl. I've spent a lot more time studying in the sanctum since then, and I'm still uncomfortable—perhaps because I heard and felt something strange the first time. Or due to my vision of the flames in the hallway where Tobias spoke to me. The same flames I saw in the images that hit me when I invaded Becci's memories. Was I near here in that vision?
Shaking away the chilling thoughts, I push open the heavy wooden door to the small study room. Jamie pores over a blue leather-bound book, fringe fl
opping forwards hiding his eyes. Several others are spread around the desk, some open and others closed.
"Wow, this is an intense study session," I say and close the door.
Jamie startles and slams the book closed. He pushes his fringe from his face. "Maeve. What's wrong?"
"Nothing, I couldn't find you in the library and April told me you were down here." I perch on the edge of the desk. "Why? Do I need an excuse to talk to you?"
"No." He's pink-cheeked and flustered as he gathers the books together. "I lost track of time."
"What are you studying?"
"Spells."
"Yes, Jamie. Which ones?"
"And I'm looking for more information on the academy." He waves a hand at the books. "These are old case notes from the time the place was an asylum. I don't understand half of what's written."
I shiver, distracted from my question. "I bet that's not pleasant reading."
He snorts. "Boring. Pages and pages of daily menus and patient names and addresses. Hardly anything else."
"Did you find building plans?"
"Not yet, but I'll keep searching." He rests back in his chair, face weary.
I hate we're back to awkwardness. Jamie shrank away when Ash and Andrei reappeared, which worries me because the last thing I want is for Jamie to think he's less important. I make an effort to spend time with him, away from the other guys, but the distance has grown since the party and his new study schedule.
"Is everything okay with us, Jamie?" I ask.
"Why wouldn't it be?" He looks up, brows tugged down.
"You're either preoccupied, or you're ignoring me." I reach out and link my fingers with his. "Or both."
"I'm preoccupied, Maeve."
I bite my lip. Is he lying? "I thought Andrei was inaccessible, but you... you're inscrutable sometimes, even with this witch bond." Jamie looks away. "Should I tell you what I thought when I first met you?"
He blinks at me. "Why?"
"Because I want you to know. I climbed from my parents' car, nervous about what I was facing, and then I saw you. You walked towards me, and you brought some warmth with you into the freezing day."
