Wild Passions of a Mischievous Duchess
Page 24
“It is no sacrifice at all,” he said. “How can I make you see that I am choosing happiness by choosing you? I want to be free.”
“What about Bridget?”
Gerard grinned slightly. “She is booting me out of Stonehill unless I win you back. She has been fighting for you. She does not want to lose her friend. And we will see her, she will visit us in Hadminster, or meet us abroad. She travels often and assures us that we will not be able to shake her off so easily.”
Elizabeth went silent. Was this not what she wanted? Why did she hesitate?
It seems too good to be true. He will always miss Christine, no matter how far we roam. I will always have to share my space in his heart with the ghost of his first love.
Is that so terrible?
“Marry me, Elizabeth. Run away with me. We will have such grand adventures.”
She leaned her forehead against his chest, not knowing what to say. Should she follow the dictates of her heart, impulsively tossing fear to the wind and boarding a ship with the Duke of Hadminster? Or should she stick to the safer path, folding her life into the confines of a governess’ room in someone else’s home forever?
“Are you sure?” she asked
“I’m sure.”
“Where will we go?”
“Wherever you want, I will get us there. Only say that you will be my wife.”
Her voice caught in her throat. Her eyes welled with tears as the future opened up before her. She could see herself, growing old and gray, thinking about the life she might have had if only she had been brave enough in this moment.
She nodded, only half consciously. Her heart spoke for her, overriding her brain. “Yes. I will be your wife, if you take me from here.”
His hands came up to cradle her face, tilting it up as he kissed her. His lips on hers again felt like coming home. A warmth washed over her, drawing her against his body. He enfolded her, wrapping his arms around her back and she wished that she could live the rest of her life tucked into him just like this. He could shield her from any harsh winds, any dangerous waters of life, if only she stayed wrapped up in him.
“We cannot get married in London,” he said after a time. “It won’t be safe. We will travel to Hadminster and marry there with little publicity. Bridget and Jonathan and Thomas will come. Perhaps Rosaline. And Dorothy if you wish. With such a small party, we will not have to worry about outsiders appearing to put you in danger.”
Elizabeth nodded along, gripping his waistcoat. She stood on her toes and kissed underneath his jaw, her lips finding the rough contours of his face with the ease of returning to a beloved hidden spot.
“From there we will leave to…where?” he asked.
“I want to see St. Peters,” she said automatically. It wasn’t even a conscious thought she had. It was just an unspoken desire that had been hidden in her heart for years, with no hope of coming true, that came bubbling forth at the opportunity.
“Rome it is, then.” He smiled
“Rome…” she whispered, laying her head back against his chest.
It didn’t feel real. Elizabeth had a secret fear that in reality she was asleep on the couch and all of this was a dream. She felt that this conversation would slip out from underneath her at any moment and she would be back in the desolate landscape of loneliness and disappointed hope. She clung onto him tightly.
“It’s all right, darling,” he whispered against her hair. “It’s all right now. You’ll see. But there is much to prepare. We must move quickly now, lest the word gets out somehow.”
“Right,” she said, straightening up again. Gerard’s lips curled into a smile as he wiped tears from her cheeks.
How had I ever thought I could live the rest of my life without his touch on my cheek?
“I will go and tell Bridget. She will know what to do. Gather your belongings, because I do not know how quickly things will move from here and you must be ready to leave at once. Tell no one.”
“I won’t.” Elizabeth grinned as she watched Gerard shift into a man of sudden action. He was suddenly bursting with energy, reaching for his overcoat and jamming his hat atop his head.
Before he burst out the door to inform Bridget of the news, he grasped her by the waist and pulled her into one last kiss. This one was deep and possessive. His arms gripped her tight, his muscles flexing beneath her hands as she clung to his biceps. He took her breath away, leaving her gasping as he hurried out the door.
Elizabeth swayed in his wake. He seemed to have sucked the air out of the room with him and she felt breathless and dizzy with him gone. She looked around the room, seeing the newspaper still spread out on the desk. Feeling giddy, she went to it and picked it up, reading her advertisement one last time before ripping the paper to shreds. The ripping noise filled the space, deafening in her own ears as she ripped it to smaller and smaller pieces, letting them fall to the desk in a haphazard pile. Then she swept the torn bits into the wastebasket with her forearm.
I will never go back. I will only go forward.
It didn’t take her long to pack her things. She dragged her trunk from its place behind a screen in the corner and began shoving her belongings into it. She found that she cared not a whit for anything she owned. Every gown, every little trinket or memento, only seemed like a vestige of the past now. She almost wished she could leave with only the clothes on her back.
How had everything changed so fast? Only this morning she had been steeling her nerves against a future that looked grim and bleak, and now? Now she could see only Gerard. Gerard and Rome. Gerard and the world.
Despite how quickly everything was moving, she did not want it to stop or slow down. She wanted it to go even faster. She wanted to fling herself into the future, unconscious of the dangers or the risks.
With all of her things packed, she flung the windows open, letting a burst of chilly air swirl into the room, waking up her senses and rushing through her hair. She gulped the fresh air and sat down atop her trunk, kicking her legs with anticipation.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Gerard raced up the marble steps of Stonehill, taking two or three at a time. The carriage ride had seemed interminably long, and now that he was on his feet all he wanted to do was run.
When he found Bridget, she was sitting with Rosaline in a sunny upstairs parlor. They each had hoops of embroidery in their hands and had been chatting gently when he burst into the room. The door bounced against the wall and came back almost to hit him, but he caught it with his hand.
“Saints alive!” Bridged exclaimed, jumping up. “What’s happened?”
Gerard was out of breath, his chest heaving, as a wide grin spread across his face.
“He’s lost his mind!” Rosaline said, standing up as well.
“I’m getting married,” Gerard corrected.
Bridget threw her embroidery down and rushed to him, her face a picture of exuberance as she flung her arms around his neck. “Oh thank God! I’m so pleased!”
“When?” Rosaline asked. She was standing where she had been and looked stiff with shock.
“As soon as possible. We leave for Hadminster at once. There we will fetch the minister and perform the wedding in secret. Then, we sail for Rome,” he said, twirling his sister around once before setting her back onto her slippered feet.
“Rome! How romantic!” Bridget exclaimed.
“It was Elizabeth’s choosing. From there, who knows where? It doesn’t matter. All that matters is that I am getting married and we are going away.”
“Where is she, now? Is she here?” Bridget looked around Gerard as though she suspected that Elizabeth might be hiding behind him.
“She’s still at the inn, getting packed and everything in order. I ran straight here after she accepted me. There’s much to prepare.”
“Why, Gerard,” Rosaline broke in. “It’s already late afternoon. Do you really intend to travel through the night? It makes much more sense to have a night’s rest and leave at sun
rise. Give Elizabeth time to settle in to the idea.”
“Oh, I don’t want to wait. We must leave London at once, before anyone catches wind of our plans. It must be done in secret, obviously. For her safety.”
“Come, sit down.” Rosaline was grasping his hand, pulling him towards the settee. He sat down and she settled herself next to him and poured him a cup of tea from the teapot that had been between the two ladies as they were working.
He took the cup automatically and took a sip. The tea was tepid and overbrewed by now. He found that he was thirsty, however, and downed the little teacup in one great gulp. He found his breath then but he was still exhilarated from the run and the rush of everything that had happened.
“Tell us the whole story,” Rosaline said. “We want to know how it happened.”
He smiled wider, placing the teacup back down on its saucer.
“Well, Bridget talked sense into me before leaving for the ball last night,” he began. “And I must say that her threat was most convincing.”
Bridget laughed, shaking her head.
“What threat?” Rosaline asked.
“Oh, I may have led him to believe that he wouldn’t be welcome back at Stonehill unless he convinced Elizabeth to marry him after all,” she said archly.
“Led me to believe! You said it outright!”
Bridget laughed again and shrugged her shoulders.
“My goodness…” Rosaline breathed.
“So, all last night I lay awake in my bed in a torment. I knew that Bridget was right and that I had to at least try to win her back. I didn’t know that I would be successful, but I had to swallow my pride and try at least. London means less to me than Elizabeth. I was a fool to ever think otherwise. We will have the whole world to shelter us from this shadowy madman. When I went to her today, I guess I managed to convince her of the same.” He leaned back in the settee, smiling broadly.
“Hold on. So, you’re leaving London for good?” Rosaline asked.
“If it’s unsafe for my bride here, then we will not come back,” he said matter-of-factly.
“But what about us?” Rosaline asked, looking at Bridget then back at him. She looked rather panicked and Gerard, feeling a twinge of guilt, leaned forward and placed his hand on her shoulder.
“Hadminster is still safe. When we come back to England, you will be able to visit us there. London isn’t everything. And you both have the means to travel, you could come along.”
Rosaline looked pale, even as she trained her lips into a smile. “Oh. But, we will miss you terribly. London isn’t the same without you.”
“Don’t fret, Rosaline,” Bridget said. “Now, when we do see him, he will finally be happy again. As he once was. Our visits will be twice as pleasant even if they are half as often.”
Rosaline laughed and Gerard relaxed a little bit as she seemed to adjust to the idea. He’d not considered that he might hurt anyone’s feelings by leaving London behind.
“I suppose you’re right. I’m sorry.” Her gaze softened on Gerard. “I’m so happy for you. After all this time, you’ve finally gotten what you want and deserve.”
“I am going to go to the inn and help her get her things. We will bring her things here tonight and you can leave as soon as possible.” Bridget was standing up, wrapping her shawl round her and reaching for the flowered bonnet that hung from its ribbons off the back of a nearby chair.
“No!” Gerard said. “No, we cannot bring her to Stonehill, even for a night, even for a few hours. The best theory that Detective Collins had been able to come up with, was that the perpetrator was a jealous member of the staff. I can’t have her here. She must stay at the inn where she is safe and we will bring the carriage to her when it’s time to leave.”
“But we must go congratulate her at least,” Rosaline said.
“I need help getting the plans in order.” Gerard directed this at Bridget. “I have to secure passage to Rome while I am here, before going to Hadminster. A message must be sent ahead to the minister. I’ve never been married before. I don’t know what needs to be done before the wedding can take place.”
Bridget nodded. “Yes, of course. I will stay here and help you get everything in order. Rosaline?” She looked to her friend. “Can you go to Elizabeth and prepare her for the journey, and let her know that arrangements are being made immediately? She must be ready to leave tonight.”
Rosaline nodded eagerly. “I’d be happy to.”
There was a flurry of activity as Rosaline headed out and Bridget grasped Gerard by the arm and pulled him to the table where she procured a sheet of paper and an ink well.
Gerard was giddy with excitement, and the sight of his sister drawing up a list of things to do was unusually funny to him.
“You’re laughing like a madman,” Bridget said, giggling herself.
“I just can’t believe it’s all happening so fast. And you making a list, I have to say that it’s a most comforting sight. I knew I could count on you to manage everything.”
Bridget looked up at him. “You know that a good list can fix anything. If you’ve ever learned anything from me, it’s that.”
He watched over her shoulder as she wrote down everything that needed to be done in London before they left for Hadminster. Gerard had an idea that weddings were complex occasions, and on such short notice it would be even more of a whirlwind. But Bridget was adept at mapping it all out so simply that he had no doubts that they could make it happen.
“I was almost afraid that Rosaline was unhappy,” Gerard said casually as Bridget finished the list.
“I think she was just surprised, is all. I hadn’t mentioned to her about speaking to you before the ball. I thought it best not to, to avoid a spectacle. Come, there’s no time for chit-chat, you must start packing up.”
She followed him to his rooms and Gerard hauled his trunk out from the corner of the room and opened it. “Why would you think that Rosaline would cause a spectacle? Has she told you something about Elizabeth and I?” he asked as he packed.
Bridget had a book across her lap where she was sitting and was scripting out a note for the footman to take to the docks to secure passage to Rome.
Bridget laughed. “Isn’t it obvious? She’s always been in love with you.”
“With me?” Gerard stopped what he was doing and stared at Bridget. The thought had never crossed his mind.
“Yes, silly. She’s not good at hiding it. That explains her shock about your sudden re-engagement.”
Gerard shook his head. “No, that can’t be right. She’s like my sister. She’s always been like part of our family.”
“Yes, I know,” Bridget said, with a tone of impatience, like she was explaining something obvious to a child. “Which is why I have always tried to gently discourage her. If I had any inkling that you thought of her that way things would be quite different today. But even though I’ve told her that you only have brotherly feelings towards her, she’s never fully given up on marrying you. Though I suppose that’s changed now.”
“Oh.” Gerard was shaken by this sudden revelation. Suddenly he was looking back at past interactions with Rosaline in a different light. He’d never picked up on her flirting or subtle advances. He’d thought of her, truly, like a sister. The thought of being married to her filled him with the same sort of instinctual disgust as the thought of being married to Bridget. Not because he didn’t love her and care deeply for her. But it was just…wrong.
Then he remembered the revelation that Detective Collins had found out about her. In all the tumult of everything going on, he’d forgotten to ask Bridget if she’d known about it.
“Bridget…” he began. “A while ago, Detective Collins was looking into Rosaline’s background and he turned up something I hadn’t known before. I was wondering if she’d told you.”
“That she’s adopted? Yes, I’ve known for years.”
Gerard froze.
“What’s the matter?” Bridget asked.
Bridget laughed airily. “Oh, now don’t you be jealous, too. Friendships among women are different from friendships with men. Especially when the girl is in love with the boy. It wasn’t my business to tell anyone about her being adopted and if she didn’t tell you, then she must not have wanted you to know. Likely because she thought you wouldn’t marry her if you doubted the status of her birth.”