Dean

by Erin Havoc

  She hums under her breath. “Maybe he’s been through some bad stuff. Maybe he doesn’t like the fact he’s a shifter. It’s not like he can change it, right?”

  “Yeah, but the way he said it...” I shake my head. “I’m not surprised he’s my mate. Just a little disappointed he doesn’t have as much of a fight in him.”

  Karen reaches a hand to my shoulder and presses her fingers there, smiling. “If he’s your mate, then things are going to work out. That’s what you always say, right?”

  I nod, then change the subject. Forcing myself not to think of it, I only check the app when I’m back home, hours later. After I shower and fix myself some dinner, I turn the TV on TLC and let it play while I open the app again.

  A balloon button blinks with new messages. I receive several every day — other shifters, unmated, reach out for girls with over eighty percent compatibility. But the one on top is Dean’s. I click on it, ignoring the rest.

  Dean: We meet again.

  Natalie: Indeed we do.

  I lay the phone next to me and try to focus on the TV show but it doesn’t happen. In moments, the notification light is blinking with a new message. Biting my lip, I try to convince myself of not picking it up right away. But it’s no use.

  Dean: I’m sorry about the other day. I offended you needlessly even knowing you were my mate.

  Natalie: You meant it?

  Dean: Yes. Shifters have a sixth sense for mate-finding or something along those lines.

  I chuckle. That’s a way of putting it.

  Natalie: I’m not surprised we’re mates. You made me feel funny that day.

  Dean: If ‘funny’ is a positive thing, I’m glad to hear. I’d love to take you out to dinner. Are you free tomorrow?

  I finger the corner of my phone for a moment. We know nothing about one another. Only that we met and were incredibly turned on by the other’s presence, and that our views on shifter rights conflict.

  Would I fuck this man? Absolutely. Would I marry him?

  I’m not so sure.

  My views on social problems are inherent to my personality and I’ve learned not to silence them. We have to make some noise to get equal rights for everyone, and I don’t like the idea of him being against this.

  Yet I’ve defended several times that if someone’s your mate, you’re going to find a way. Nature finds a way. Love also does.

  Natalie: Sure. There’s this place downtown that has amazing ribs. Would you be up for it?

  Dean: Definitely. Whatever time’s best for you.

  My girl parts train somersaults the rest of the night and the entirety of the next day as I wait for the time to pass. It’s kind of ridiculous how I can’t pay attention to a single thing as I watch the clock.

  At six, I’m home. At seven, I’m ready to go. I dress to impress, a dark red frock that hugs my curves so snugly it almost feels vacuum-made. I straighten my hair but then decide to curl it in soft waves, kind of a beachy look. Mascara and a matte lipstick that won’t come off when I kiss him.

  Because I doubt I can meet this man again and not at least kiss him. My body doesn’t give a shit about my political views or social opinions. It just wants him. Inside me, on top of me, making me scream in pleasure.

  I put on heels — to reach him easier if we kiss while standing. Clearly, I have one focus for tonight.

  When I walk into the restaurant, he’s already waiting. He shoots to his feet as I walk in, and I take a moment to gawk at how handsome this man is.

  His blue eyes are still the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. He’s in a dress shirt, black as his wolf. His muscles are impossible to conceal even in long sleeves, and I watch his chest rise and fall with his breaths as I near him.

  Dean’s eyes take a tour of my body and his mouth drops half-open. “Wow,” he says when I’m close enough to hear.

  A smile stretches my lips before I can avoid it. “Hi,” I push past my grinning mouth.

  “Hi.” He picks my hand and brings it to his lips again. The press of his mouth to my knuckles brings that same sense of lust coursing up my arm to pool low between my legs. And I’m afraid this will never change.

  If we stick together, I know he’s going to make me feel hot and bothered every single day of our lives.

  Chewing on my lower lip, I pull my hand back to sit down. Quickly, Dean strides across the two-people table and pulls the chair for me. I smile up in gratitude.

  “I thought I’d never see you again,” I tell him after we order barbecue ribs.

  He shakes his head, his wild hair dancing with the motion. “I knew I’d find you. That’s how the mating bond works.”

  “But you had to download the app.” I wink, teasing him.

  He laughs. “True. It would have required less technological ways if there was no app.” He presses a hand to the table, his fingers brushing against mine. “What you’re doing is good, Natalie. I’m sorry if I sounded bitter that day.”

  “I understand you have your reasons. But several shifters use the app as their one way of finding mates. I’ll never regret creating it.”

  He nods. “And you’re right about that. I loved how you stood up for yourself and that girl.”

  Running a fingertip in circles on the crisp white tablecloth, I avert his eyes. “I was kind of disappointed at the things you said. Because I felt you were a shifter and I couldn’t understand why you felt that way.”

  He shifts on his seat, and I think the subject has become too personal, but he goes on. “I’m a wolf but I have no pack. My father was the alpha of the pack I lived in. He died when I was fourteen. It was expected I would assume the position. But another wolf opposed to it and attacked me. Several others took his side, and I was chased out.” He lifts a shoulder in a shrug. “I don’t have fond memories of living with shifters. And I have felt it on my skin how it hurts to disagree with one.”

  I reach out and curl my hand around his fingers. He grips back. “I’m so sorry. This must have been terrible.”

  “It’s been years. I just avoid sticking around so I won’t get involved in shifter problems.”

  Pulling my hand back, I let the waiter serve us of the ribs and drinks. His words churn around in my mind as I wait for the waiter to leave.

  “You’re not sticking around?”

  He looks up, a smile dancing on his lips. “I don’t usually. But don’t get me wrong. I’d do anything to stay with you.”

  Dean’s very straightforward. He sees us as mates and that’s that. No work to be done, no conquest. I could think this is a bit unromantic, but I don’t care. My heart is glad he’s around and my body aches for his touch.

  I don’t need anything else. No extra dates, no wooing. Just him.

  “So you’ve moved around a lot,” I start, digging into my ribs. “What kind of places have you seen?”

  We talk for the next hour. About the places he’s been to, the people he has met. He turns the subject to me constantly, not deeming his life interesting enough. I tell him about my family, and my goals, and how I want to help people find their one true love.

  He then asks me about several tiny things. Foods and TV shows, what do I do for a hobby. I twist the questions back to him, and he surprises me with a wide grin, telling me ribs are his favorite food. I got it right without even trying.

  At the end of the second hour, we’re smiling at each other, savoring the silence, the warmth. His hand’s on mine, and he trails slow circles on my palm. Dean leans and touches my knuckles to his lips again.

  “I’m glad you agreed to meet me,” he says with a smile. “Even if we might have different views on some things.”

  “I’m the one who’s always saying being matched doesn’t mean the relationship won’t need some work. It would be hypocritical of me to reject you. Even more, knowing I felt that way when we met.”

  His kisses run down the side of my thumb to my wrist. “How did you feel?”

  I curl my nose, heat blooming on my cheeks. �
��You know it. I’m sure you smelled it.”

  He grins, his sharp canines showing. Dean’s blue eyes darken with lust as he studies me. “I did. And it was the most enticing scent I’ve ever felt.” His voice drops to a rough murmur and his breath touches the inside of my wrist. “I could only think of drinking from you. Feeling these curves beneath my body.”

  His words send shivers rolling down my spine, my panties becoming wet, wetter. I cross my legs, hoping he won’t smell this too.

  “You know, you make me think of doing dirty things right on the first date.”

  Dean licks a spot on my wrist and I pretty much melt. “I don’t see how that’s a bad thing. These past days, waiting for the DNA results to come back, have been the worst in my life. When I saw I had to wait for it, I almost gave up and followed your trail back home.”

  I’m supposed to be afraid. Threatened. But I swallow thickly, my body aflame beneath his gaze. This man has such power over me, over my pleasure... I’m left gasping for air as he just presses his lips to my arm.

  “So, do you want to get out of here?” I stutter, the weight of his gaze too much to bear.

  “Absolutely,” he says in a growl.

  Dean pulls back the chair so I can get up, and he pays for the bill even if I insist against it. He takes my hand as we walk out of the restaurant and guides me to his dark pickup truck. He halts next to the passenger door, his hand on the handle.

  “Where to?”

  “My place, if you don’t mind.” My voice’s still tense as he leans closer and brushes his lips against my ear. I remember the day we met, and I have the very same reaction. A soft moan escapes my lips and I reach out to fist his shirt and use him for leverage.

  “Fuck, you smell so good,” he grunts into my ear, his breath starting goosebumps down my body. His big hand curls around my hip and he presses me against the car, crowding his body against mine. His hard-on twitches against my lower belly and I gasp as his body singes mine. My hard nipples brush against his chest and I rub myself against him like a cat in heat. “Keep doing that, baby, and I’ll have to fuck you right here.”

  His words burst a dam inside me and I turn my head to meet his eyes. Before he can do anything else, I clash our mouths together.

  Dean’s lips slide over mine, gently for a second, famished in the next. His hands fist my hair and he groans deep in his chest as our tastes mix. I rake my nails down his back and move against him desperately, trying to climb him like the filthy, wet woman I am right now. My focus is pinpointed to his manhood, brushing against me, eliciting moans from deep within my body.

  Our tongues tangle and dance together and he sucks on my lower lip, his fingers trailing down my neck to my shoulders, brushing along the swell of my breasts. I jut my chest out, begging him to touch me, a torrent of groans leaving my mouth as he breaks the kiss to nibble on my neck.

  “You’re not helping, baby,” he says into the crook of my neck.

  “Fuck me, Dean. Fuck me right here,” I beg him, circling my hips over his erection.

  He fists my hair again and pulls my head back, meeting my eyes. His are taken by lust, but I can see him fighting for control. “I’m not taking my mate in the parking lot of a restaurant. She deserves more than that.”

  I try to smile but my nerves buzz and my head is swimming with how bad I need him. So without a word, I let him put me inside the car and buckle the seatbelt around me. Still catching my breath, I direct him to where I live.

  I want him. But deep in my heart, I know I’m not ready for the mating bond. And I hope I won’t break him when I tell him so.

  6

  DEAN

  My wolf’s about to go crazy inside me. This might be the hardest challenge I’ve ever lived through.

  Because I want Natalie and Natalie wants me. But I sense her hesitation. I feel she’s not ready for the mating. My body can’t go another day without having her, so I’ll have to fuck her without marking her as mine.

  I don’t like this, but if there’s no other way around... As she said, being mates don’t mean we’re perfect and we won’t need some fixing. But I’d do anything to have her. Anything.

  When we enter her place, I give it a quick once-over, registering her good taste for decoration and how huge the place is. The window to the side reaches from floor to ceiling, showing off a long back yard. The moon must look fantastic from here.

  “Damn, that’s a nice place.”

  She shoots me a smile, one of those I’ll never get tired of. “And it’s close to the forest,” she walks to the windows and points to the dark patch to the left. “I met some shifters when I was developing the app. Meetings about how to approach the community best. They told me they love living near the woods. So, I thought...” She shrugs, “Maybe my mate would like it too.”

  My heart swells inside my chest and I have to bite my tongue to keep myself from bursting my feelings for her. Sure as daylight. I have loved her from the moment I put my eyes on her. Even before. From the second I smelled her. She’s beautiful and brave, way braver than I am, and she doesn’t let anyone step on her. She’s so much more than I deserve.

  I curl my hands around her hips, pressing my chest to her back. Her curves are soft to the touch, and her hair smells fantastic as I nuzzle into it. “You’re amazing. I can’t believe you think so much of others.”

  She chuckles, touching my hands over her stomach. Her touch sends a jolt to my cock, every time. “I’m doing the bare minimum. Shifters deserve the same rights as the rest of us.”

  I flip her so I kiss her pillowy lips. “No. You’re doing much more than that. You treat us better than we treat each other. I’ve seen so much shit between shifters, Nat. You’re a better person than any of us.”

  She shakes her head and runs her hands through my hair until her tits press to my chest. “So you’re not against what I do?”

  I kiss the corner of her mouth, breathing her in. “No. You’re right in fighting for equality. And I was a fool to argue with that, even more, because I’m the one getting the advantages. I just think... That may be killing them with kindness might be safer than fighting them head-on.”

  She massages my scalp until I’m rumbling with pleasure against her ear. My wolf loves it. “I think you’re right. My assistant, Karen, keeps telling me I might have a stroke arguing with specists.”

  “And we wouldn’t want that.” I kiss a trail down her earlobe to her pulse. She leans back, giving me access. I suck on her pulse, nipping on her smooth skin. In a second, we’re bucking against one another, the sweetness of the moment dripping away. Her hands come down my arms to clutch at my biceps, and my hips acquire a life of their own as I hump her. “One more thing.”

  “Um,” she hums, gripping one of my wrists and lowering my hand to her backside. I groan, taking a handful of her amazing ass.

  “I know you don’t want the mating bond right now.” I look deeply into her eyes as she pulls back, hesitation flashing across her face. “It’s okay. We don’t have to. I’ll do it when you’re ready.” If she’s ever ready.

  “So we can fuck and not create a bond? I thought that just happened between non-mates.”

  I shake my head, gripping her hips and bringing her up to my arms. She gasps, opening a smile as she slings her legs around my waist.

  “No. The mating bond is settled differently between species, so I’m not sure about the others. With wolves, it’s a bite to the neck. It heals quickly, but it’s a sign to other shifters that you’re mine.” I kiss the crook of her neck, the place one day will hold my mark. “But we can fuck without doing that.”

  “Okay,” she mutters in a shaky voice as I whirl around in my heels and walk deeper into her house. I soon find the bedroom, flicking the light switch on and lying her on the bed.

  Natalie looks up at me with heated eyes, her pupils enlarged as she licks her lips. I can’t believe this woman is about to be mine. This fantastic, curvy woman with her impressive brains and her huge heart.<
br />
  Mine.

  I come down over her, meeting her lips in a hungry kiss. It happens naturally, as if we’ve done this thousands of times, and this night is just one more in our lives. But my heart beats uneven and I feel hers skittering too.

  This is the first time. And I will make her feel so amazing, she’ll be asking me to mark her soon enough.

  Natalie hooks a leg on my hipbone, and I find the plumpness of her exposed thigh, digging my fingers into it and groaning into the kiss. My wolf trots inside me, eager to take her. Her pussy smells fantastic, and I’m dying to have my face buried between her legs. She’s going to taste delicious, and I’m starved for that.

  Parting her legs wider, she gives me space enough so my cock rams against her center. It’s torture, and I buck against her, giving her the contact, the friction she needs. Natalie’s lips drop open in moans, and I devour each and every one of them.

  “God, I’ve never felt anything like this,” she stutters out, gripping my shirt. “I think I might come even before you touch me.”

  Her words fuel me on and I get to my knees between her legs. She gasps, looking down at me as I kiss and nibble on her inner thigh. One, then the other, slowly up until I’m breathing against her covered mound. Her white panties sport a dark patch, and I grin at her as I smell her sweet arousal.

  Spreading her, I touch my nose to her center and take a deep sniff. Natalie jerks, shivers rolling down her body as I take a set of deep breaths, ingraining the way she smells like into my brain. She releases a loud, strangled gasp as I open my mouth and rake my teeth up and down her clit, over her panties.

  “Fucking baby Jesus,” she cries, fisting my hair between small fingers. “That’s it. I’m totally coming before you strip me.”

  “Really?” I say against her center and she bucks against my face. Teasingly, I touch the tip of my tongue to her covered clit, then lap at her wet panties, capturing a little of her taste. My wolf howls inside me, ordering me to rip these clothes off and take her, taste her, have her, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned to have in life, it’s self-control.