Captive: A Dark Cyborg Romance

by Loki Renard

  This explains a lot. Explains how he can be so mechanical sometimes, and at others be so very uniquely human.

  “Adam died,” he says. “But he lives on in me. I’m not the Marine who died in the field and I’m not the machine Ascent made either. I’m something else. Both. Neither.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  Adam shakes his head. “I thought I would have more time to tell you. I thought there would be more time for many things.”

  “That’s not why,” I persist. “There was a lot of time to tell me.”

  “Because it’s weakness,” he growls. “It’s something I don’t understand. You think I am a perfect cyborg. But I am human too. And that is confusing enough for me, let alone for you.”

  “I don’t mind being confused,” I tell him, brushing my lips over his neck. “I want to know you.”

  “You do? Why?”

  “Because I love you, you idiot.”

  “You love me,” he says, slipping into his borg-type talk. “Why would you love me? I hold you prisoner and I do to you what Eve wanted to do to me. What is there to love? I have some sliver of humanity in me, but in the end, I am a machine just as she was. Just a series of processes with a reproductive goal. There is nothing to love.”

  I love him all the more in this moment where he believes himself to be unlovable.

  “We’re all machines in some sense,” I say. “Humans can be seen as a series of processes with reproductive goals, but that’s not all we are, and it’s not all you are. I love you because you give me what I need.”

  “What do you need?”

  “Someone to challenge me. Someone to love me. Someone to fuck me. Someone to…” I almost choke on the word, but I have to be truthful now more than ever, “…discipline me.”

  A smile appears on his lips. “You are a very naughty human,” he agrees. “You need a lot of discipline.”

  “I do,” I agree, less shamefully, though I am blushing. “I love you because you know me, Adam. You care about me, and I know you too. We both know each other in ways nobody else does, or could ever hope to. And that’s what love is.”

  “Love is knowing,” he says in a thoughtful tone.

  “Love is knowing and not running for the hills,” I say, smiling a little. “Love is knowing someone for all their flaws and wanting them anyway. I want you, Adam. You don’t have to hold me captive. I’ll happily hold myself captive for you.”

  He smirks and shakes his head. “We will see,” he says. “Because you and I are going to go to the hills together. To the mountains.”

  “We are?”

  “We have to leave the city. Eventually another Eve may find us and I am sure the next one will not be programmed to sacrifice herself for me. They will keep hunting us until we disappear. So we have to go disappear. There are places where no man goes. Wilds where we will live as we please. It will not be a life as you have known it, or I, but we will survive out there as we cannot here. We will live free.” Free. I’m not sure there’s such a thing anymore. But I’m willing to try to find it.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Human. Adam is human.

  I should be more surprised than I am, but the moment he spilled his secret, myriad pieces fell into place. Cyborg technology can make animate robots that approximate humans, but it can’t give them that spark of personality that has animated him from the beginning. Humanity is what separated Adam from the Eve model they sent to hunt us. Humanity, and functioning genitals.

  Her death angers me still. She was a parody of a woman, a sexless creature made to mimic femininity. They made her look like a siren, but she was an innocent who deserved better than she received in the end, to die like a dog at the very hands of those who made her.

  I want revenge. Revenge for her, for Adam, for myself. I want to tear down the establishment and watch it burn. I want to do what Adam did to Ascent, but I want to do it to the entirety of the corrupt government who toys with us all like pawns.

  We are running away, and the idea of escape is alluring, but there is a dark, destructive part of me that wants not to run, but to stand and to fight, to die if I have to. I think Adam understands that, because he keeps a very close eye on me, and when I begin to give in to the anger that threatens at times to utterly overwhelm me, he holds me tight until I surrender and it passes.

  His telling me of his human origin has changed everything between us for the better. He is still the creature he was before he told me, but in telling me, he has given me permission to see the man behind the muscles, the dominance, the rough desire. All those things are still there, even enhanced, but I understand them better now. He is not just a battered, beaten creature socialized via data upload. He is a man who has been fractured and shattered, who is making his way back from the brink of nonexistence. Every day we spend together, I see that part of him grow. In a sense, the true Adam is starting to inhabit the body we made for the cyborg.

  Our escape from the city is arduous. It’s not a matter of just walking out. We spend our days in the most dangerous and disgusting places, lurking in sewers, fighting our way across old streets and through the architecture of the damned and forgotten, scavenging what we can as we go. I am no longer his captive. I am his accomplice. It is the two of us against the forces who seek to capture and enslave us both, and with our intellects both focused on escape, we are making our way further and further out of the warren of monitored territory.

  The erotic interludes that were so frequent during my captivity are at a minimum now. With no safe place to stay, we are reduced to sleeping and eating on the run, carrying the supplies we need on our backs. That does not dull his dominance one bit, or my submission. There is a need to obey now, to be of one singular mind. I follow his instructions to the letter, because to do anything else would be to give our enemies an advantage.

  “Come here.”

  Adam yanks me out of my thoughts, his fingers closing around my upper arm as he pulls me to him. We are standing in an abandoned work yard. Once upon a time they welded fuel tankers here, now the concrete structure stands hollow aside from rusting cranes and a few old tools left for posterity.

  I look up into his face curiously, wondering if I’m in trouble. I haven’t done anything to deserve it, and it’s been a long time since I’ve done anything like that, but there’s something in his eyes, a seriousness that makes me quiver deep inside. He is masterful, even as a fugitive. His large hand caresses my cheek, runs down to my shoulder and clasps me gently.

  “I owe you an apology.”

  “Oh?” Those are about the last words I ever expected to hear out of Adam’s mouth, especially now, apropos of nothing.

  “I took you with a purpose in mind.”

  I blush at the memory of that purpose. A visceral, carnal, basic purpose. He wanted to use me as men have used women for millennia. He wanted to spill his seed in me and have me bear his children. For a time, it felt like that was all he wanted from me.

  “You remember?” he prompts me.

  “I remember,” I say, swallowing.

  “I thought I wouldn’t live long. I thought I could do just one thing before I was killed,” he explains. “A baby would be something good. Some way of making sure everything I went through meant something.”

  I nod, my hand reflexively passing low over my belly. I don’t know if I’m pregnant or not. I haven’t had my period, which could be a sign of pregnancy, but might also be a sign of being a fugitive from vicious government forces.

  “I was wrong.”

  Those three little words hang in the air, astounding me thoroughly.

  “Holy shit. You, wrong?”

  “Don’t give me attitude right now, brat,” he growls. “I’m trying to apologize, and that’s going to be harder if I have to put my dick in your mouth to keep you quiet while I do it.”

  A crude threat, but an effective one. I blush and grin at the same time as Adam shakes his head and reaches around me to give my butt a relatively
light swat.

  “Ow!”

  “Hush,” he says. “I’m trying to be romantic and sincere.”

  My grin is apparently a little too wide, because I get a much harder slap across my ass, one that brings me to my toes and presses me against the cyborg mass of muscle that makes up his body.

  “Listen,” he growls, clamping his hand over my mouth before I can complain again. “A baby isn’t what I need. You are. You are the woman who gave me new life. The one who tried to sacrifice herself for me. You are the only person who ever meant anything to me, and the only person I ever meant anything to.” His voice cracks with emotion, and my eyes start to mist with tears, blurring my vision as he draws me into a tender embrace and holds me so close. “You are my everything, Lilly,” he rumbles in my ear. “I need you to know that.”

  Whizzzzzzip!

  A bullet takes out a chunk of concrete next to Adam’s ear. Everything goes into slow motion. I whip around to see several figures atop the old wall. They’ve found us. God knows how. Maybe a drone. Maybe someone sold us out for information. They’ve been dropping leaflets with our descriptions everywhere. Or maybe it was a satellite. What does it matter.

  Zzzzzzzippp!

  Another bullet goes singing past my ear. I hear Adam grunt, and know that he’s been hit. It’s not the end of the world. Adam can take a bunch of bullets. Me, not so much.

  He grabs me and pulls me behind him as the soldiers open fire. I guess they’re tired of trying to bring us in alive. I guess dead is preferable now. We don’t have much in the way of weapons. Adam has salvaged a few here and there, but ammunition is practically impossible to come by now, so though he’s strapped with some guns, we’ve probably got maybe twelve rounds total. Not enough against even the relatively small contingent who have us pinned down.

  “Run with me!” he shouts over his shoulder. “Head for the sewers.”

  They don’t like following us into the sewers. Their communications equipment doesn’t work down there, and they don’t like the risk of being lost. The old sewers are like dried-up shitty warrens. Terrifying to well-brought-up government soldiers.

  We run. It’s not far, maybe ten feet, but ten feet under fire may as well be ten miles. Adam takes the bullets that manage to find him. The rest of them spray against the walls. The soldiers obviously aren’t short of them.

  Ting!

  I never thought the sound of my death would be quite so trite.

  A bullet ricochets against an old metal strut. I feel an impact in my gut, like being punched. I look down, frowning as red blossoms across my belly, as if I’ve been splashed with a watery crimson paint. A second later, Adam drags me down into the sewers. I try to tell him what’s happened, but I can’t. He grabs me up onto his back and he runs with me, not knowing I’m hurt. I try to speak, but all I can do is gargle and gurgle. Screaming isn’t an option. I can’t breathe. I try, but I’m sucking air to no avail. It’s like oxygen doesn’t work anymore.

  The world is going dark around the edges by the time he stops and slides me from his back. I see the surprise on his face as I slump down to the ground, and then the growing horror.

  “Lilly!” He calls my name, falling to his knees beside me.

  It’s dark. I’m cold. My teeth are chattering. My thoughts are slowing. This is how my story ends. It takes so little to end a life. It all begins with a single sperm finding the right little crevice, and it ends with a single bullet finding just the right artery.

  Adam hauls me against his body, hugging me, but I can’t feel him anymore. I can’t feel anything, anything except the creeping cold. So… so… cold.

  * * *

  Adam

  I never deserved Lilly.

  She gave me new life, but when I escaped Ascent and found her, I did not thank her, not for the gift of the technology that made it possible to meld human mind and cyborg brain, or for her sweetness in attempting to save me from what the powers had in store for me.

  I should have fallen to my knees and worshipped her. Instead I took her and I used her as a repository for my cum. I was harsh and demanding. I was cruel and stern, and all the while I was ruthlessly dominating her, I was afraid that the softness and openness she showed me would be erased if she knew my secret humanity. I hid myself from her, even as I demanded she give me everything. I used her body, I punished her for asserting her natural desire to escape, and in the end, all my cyborg strength was not enough to save her.

  “Lilly… sweetheart… wake up, Lilly.”

  I croon the words down at her, my finger stroking the side of her cheek lightly. She is so still. Her face is a pure mask of beauty. She is lying on the cold concrete, looking for all the world as though she is sleeping. But she’s not sleeping. The bullet made a mash of everything from her ribs to her hips, slicing through vital organ after vital organ. She lived for no more than sixty seconds after it hit, died almost before I even knew she was hurt.

  “Lilly…” I murmur her name again. “Come on now, Lilly, wake up, baby. Come on…”

  Nothing. She doesn’t move. Not so much as an eyelash twitches. Is she gone forever? Will I never see her eyes animated with rebellion and intellectual fire again? I don’t deserve to, but I can’t let her go. Not yet.

  I take a deep breath. I cannot lose her. She cannot be gone. I was supposed to be the one who died at the hands of those who hunt us. Not her. She was supposed to be safe. I was supposed to make sure she was safe.

  I failed.

  I smooth my large hand over her hair, brushing it back from her head. I would give anything for her to open her eyes, part her lips, and say something impertinent. She gave me as much trouble as I gave her, and I loved her for it, even when I had to punish her for it.

  Her skin is so pale now.

  “Lilly… come on.”

  Nothing.

  I am at a crossroads. Let her slide into the beyond all alone, her struggles at an end, her life unlived. And carry on alone against the soldiers. Is there any point in escape now, without her? Is there any sense in revenge? Without her, life itself is a senseless thing.

  They have taken her from me. With that bullet, they removed the one thing keeping me sane, making me human. I thought it was the bit of tissue in my head that kept me from being a cold, ruthless being without mercy. Now I realize that it was her.

  I look at the blade in my hand.

  I look down at Lilly.

  I start cutting.

  * * *

  Lilly

  “Lilly…”

  I’m tired. I don’t want to get up.

  “Lilly… sweetheart, wake up…”

  I groan and try to turn over, bury myself in the blankets, but I can’t seem to move.

  “Lilly, I can see your eyelashes fluttering. Wake up, honey.”

  At first, I don’t recognize the voice. It’s so soft and gentle, so full of love that it takes my brain a few moments to realize who it’s coming from. Adam. His masculine timbre is distinctive, even as he speaks in cooing tones I have certainly never heard him use before.

  It’s strange enough to make me open my eyes. As I do, I remember that I died. Did… did he die too? Do cyborgs go to heaven?

  I look into his face, and see his expression drenched with love. There are tears running down his face as he wraps his arms around me and cradles me gently where I lie.

  “It worked,” he says, his voice shaking. “It worked.”

  “What worked?” My voice is husky, and my throat is a little sore, as if something has been down it.

  Adam draws back a little, and looks into my face with a gaze more human and emotional than I’ve ever seen on his face before. “I don’t want you to panic. You were shot.”

  “I know. I didn’t like it.”

  My dour response hides just how surprised I am to be awake. I’m also surprised that nothing hurts. Am I doped up on painkillers? Doesn’t feel like it. I’m more clear-headed than I’ve been in a very long time. I actually feel incredible. Which
is wrong. Maybe I am dead. Maybe we’re both dead.

  “You died,” he says, matter of fact. “I managed to find the materials to get a basic breathing machine working to keep your body from deteriorating, and then I went back and… salvaged some parts.”

  I died. A shudder runs through me. I was dead and there was nothing. Nothing until his voice reached through the void and pulled me back. Wait… what did he say? He salvaged parts? People don’t come in parts.

  “You mean you harvested someone’s organs for me?”

  “Sort of.” He puts his hand over mine. “I did the same thing for you that you did for me, just not as elegantly.”

  What the hell… my mind races as I try to understand what he’s talking about. What did I do for him? I mean aside from make him a body from scratch… oh… no…

  I push back the sheet covering my body and look down. He has… well. The simple explanation is that he’s taken Eve’s midsection and he’s attached my body to it. I still have my hips, my legs, my sex, but the area from my ribs to my belly button is definitely not mine. The join isn’t too bad, the skin has seamlessly integrated, but I know something has been changed. I can feel it. I have a vigor that isn’t mine, that isn’t entirely human.

  “Transplant,” he says. “Cyborg technology. Replaced your liver, lower intestine, spleen, few other bits and pieces…”

  “Can you not talk about me as if I’m a used car?” I interrupt him. “You went back and used Eve’s body, didn’t you.”

  “Yes,” he says, looking proud, and so fucking happy I almost feel guilty for wanting to tear his head off.

  “You made me a cyborg. You must have doped me up with nanosims to get the tech to take this fast, I mean…”

  “Oh, yeah,” he agrees, nodding swiftly. “I used most of the remnants of my supply. Don’t worry, you won’t need another dose. I haven’t taken one in weeks and I’m holding steady.”

  “Well, one, you don’t know that and two…” I take a deep breath. “Two, you turned me into a fucking cyborg. Without my permission.”