Covert Identity

by Maria Hammarblad

  She cursed and took a long walk with the dog to calm herself.

  Where was this stupid club anyway?

  To her surprise, Siri offered an answer to that. And a map.

  Sharon put Tiffy in her crate and headed for the car.

  "This is probably the worst idea I've had in my life."

  The car offered no answers, and Siri led the way to a ragged industrial area outside the city, yet surprisingly close to her house.

  There could be no doubt which of the sordid buildings belonged to the bikers; a long row of big machines glittered in the sunshine. She pulled up close to a warehouse and leaned her chin against the steering wheel as she looked out.

  The door opened and a group of people came out. There was no mistaking Jimmy.

  He started smoking again. That's bad.

  As if that was a problem worthy of attention at the moment. Everyone in the group looked dangerous and biker-ish. Maybe not as much as Mr. Hate, but definitely dangerous.

  A brunette dressed in torn jeans and a tank top came out of the building and wrapped her hands around Jimmy's arm, making Sharon feel like throwing up.

  No. He doesn't get to do this. If he's dumping me, I should at least get the opportunity to yell at him for it. He can't just disappear.

  She got out of the car and put her sunglasses on, trying to decide what to do. As tempted as she was to storm up to the group and make a scene, it probably wasn't a great idea.

  The group stirred before she could make up her mind. Someone pointed towards her and the car, and even from a distance she could see an expression of surprise fly over Jimmy's face.

  Had someone recognized her from Sebring?

  No, it was the car. It had to be the car. These guys knew their vehicles, and if someone had seen her truck there they would know it anywhere.

  Jimmy made himself free from the brunette and Sharon took some satisfaction in seeing how brusquely he shook the woman off. He jogged towards her, grabbed her arm, and pulled her towards the car.

  She struggled to get free, but it was in vain. He was immeasurably stronger than her.

  Is that fear in his eyes? Fear for me, or of me?

  "I know how this looks, and it's not like that, I swear it's not like that. You can't be here, it's not safe. Slap me and storm away."

  His voice was so quiet she could barely hear him.

  "What the hell is going on?"

  He stopped by the driver's door and met her gaze for a moment.

  "You have to go."

  He bent forward, brushing his lips against her cheek.

  "I'll try to come by later. Now please, pretty please, hit me and get out of here."

  "You want me to hit you? You really want me to hit you?"

  The expression on his face said, "Yes."

  She never raised her hand in violence before, not against anyone, and it surprised her how easy it was to slap him. She hit him harder than she intended, and yelled, "Asshole!"

  It was well loud enough to carry over to the group by the building, and she heard a man laugh as she jumped into the car and slammed the door so hard she feared the glass would break. She didn't have to pretend being upset, and the tears welling out of her eyes were real. Stomping on the gas pedal made her rear wheels spin and screech, and then the car finally found traction.

  In spite of all the dust and smoke she stirred up, she could still see Jimmy in the rear view mirror. He rubbed his cheek and looked after her for a second before heading back to the group with his arms stretched out in a gesture of women.

  The brunette swept her arms around him, and the last Sharon saw before she turned the corner was him wrapping an arm around her shoulders, reaching for a beer.

  Not what it looks like my ass. I should go back and run him over with the car. Or at least go back and yell some more. Maybe hit him again.

  Appealing thought.

  She eased off the gas pedal and looked for a place to turn around, but it must be rush hour for semis. She was surrounded by trucks so large they made her old Chevy look like a midget, and stopping or turning was out of the question.

  Her phone beeped on the way home. The message said, "I'll talk to you soon."

  She said, "Like hell you will," and turned it off.

  *****

  Sharon still sniffled when evening came, and curled up on the sofa with the TV on and Tiffy pressed against her.

  "I guess it's just you and me, girl. I thought your dad was different, but he's a cheating douchebag just like all other men. At least we have each other."

  She couldn't stand to sleep in the bed where they spent so many nights together, so she curled up on the sofa once again. The dog seemed content with snoozing next to her under the throw, and feeling the warm puppy body close made things better.

  When someone knocked on the door, she couldn't place it at first. The sound didn't belong in her solitary dream world.

  Tiffy growled deep in her throat.

  "You're a good girl."

  Looking through the peephole revealed Jimmy standing outside.

  I shouldn't let him in. I should let him stand there, so he can see how it feels.

  Tiffy barked.

  "Whose side are you on? Do you want me to let him in, or keep him locked out?"

  The dog barked again.

  "Let him in?"

  Tiffy wagged her tail.

  "Fine."

  She kept the security chain on and opened the door to a slit.

  "What do you want?"

  "Can I come in?"

  Glaring was almost impossible when wanting to fall to the floor in a whimpering pile, but she still gave it her best.

  "Why? Did your new girl throw you out?"

  He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. He really did look unhappy.

  "Sharon, please let me in."

  She didn't realize how her hands shook until she tried to get the security chain off.

  At least Tiffy was happy to see him. The entire dog seemed to wag, as if she had a hinge in the middle.

  Sharon was sure her eyes were red and puffy, but when Jimmy stepped inside, he didn't look all that good either. He had dark rings under his eyes and his face looked gray and wrinkly. He headed for the sofa, sank down, and rested his head in his hands.

  She went back to the corner where she'd been sleeping and pulled the throw up over her. It was soft and cuddly and would help her keep it together. The day had been a disaster. No reason to expect the night to be any better.

  Jimmy glanced over towards her and she couldn't bite down a mean comment.

  "You look like shit. What have you been up to? She keeping you busy?"

  "I can't tell you everything yet, babe. I wish I could, but I just can't."

  "I think you've forfeited the right to call me babe."

  He sighed and reached over to take her hand. She pulled hers back and he took it again.

  "I know how this looks. Can you have faith in me just a couple more days and I will tell you everything?" He pressed her fingers against his cheek. "Please?"

  She narrowed her eyes. "Tell me about the girls."

  While still looking tired, he also seemed amused.

  "You don't want to know where I've been the last few days, if I killed anyone, raped any kittens, or sold drugs to puppies?"

  When put like that, she couldn't prevent her mouth from twitching too.

  "I might be stupid, but I trust you with all those things. Tell me about the girls."

  He lifted an eyebrow. "Can I have a beer?"

  "No. Girls. Truth."

  He murmured, "Come here," and she didn't protest when he pulled her close, entangling his fingers in her hair. Sitting close to him soothed her, and when resting her head against his chest, feeling his jacket against her cheek and his strong arms around her, his words almost seemed reasonable.

  "I know this will sound like something a cheating man would say, but that girl you saw, all the girls over there, mean absolutely nothing to me. I
don't even like them."

  Talk's cheap. Why did I let you in? You feel too good and I want to believe you so bad.

  "I know this doesn't make any sense, but I really need to fit in just a little while longer. It'll be over soon one way or another, and if I ever upset you again I will stand still and let you shoot me with Mona's pink shotgun."

  Couldn't he just deny having an affair, like a normal man would? Saying they meant nothing to him and that he needed to fit in sure sounded like he was humping them.

  She always rolled her eyes at women believing any dumb lie from their man, forgiving even the most obvious missteps. She had promised herself never to be like them, and she should know better than forgiving him.

  If she threw him out right now she wouldn't have to mourn losing him again. Getting pulled back in would not be smart.

  I believe him. Why do I believe him? Is this exactly what happens to all women? Do I want you to be true so badly I choose not to see what's right before my eyes?

  Jimmy said, "Babe?"

  She was so deep into her own thoughts she didn't understand what he meant.

  "Get your own beer."

  It surprised her to feel a finger under her chin, pushing her head up until she looked into his eyes.

  "Are you okay? Are we okay?"

  The question was so atypical for him it rocked her out of her mood.

  "I don't know. Are you having sex with more people than me?"

  "No." The answer came without hesitation and sounded honest.

  He kissed her temple. "If I could choose, I would stay right here, in the sofa with you for at least a week. After that I might want to take you for a picnic on the beach, drive up along the coastline, maybe go camping... Outdoors sex is the best."

  I hate camping. Bugs in the tent, bugs in the sleeping bag...

  He still made it sound appealing, and she could imagine sitting by a campfire with him, traveling around on that monster for a motorcycle. It would take them away from the city and all the strange people he hung with. They might not be able to bring Tiffy, but Mona would take the dog for a while.

  "Okay. Take me camping. Let's go right now."

  He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes.

  "Give me another week or so and I will."

  His tone of voice sounded like he expected to be dead long before that.

  She had been too preoccupied with nursing jealousy and a broken heart to pay attention, but there might be more to this than her hurt feelings.

  "Why? What do you think is gonna happen?"

  He avoided the question.

  "It's in the middle of the night and I think I'm gonna take my woman to bed. It's overdue."

  "If that thing has been touching those girls, it's not coming anywhere near me."

  Jimmy laughed. "I'm assuming the thing is my dick? Don't worry, it's yours and yours alone, my sweet."

  Trusting him was a bad idea, but she still let herself be pacified, and sleeping in his arms was heaven.

  It was still dark outside when Jimmy slipped out of bed and pulled his clothes on.

  She leaned on her elbow. "What are you doing?"

  Why do you look so surprised? Did you think you could sneak out of here without waking me?

  He leaned across the bed and pressed his lips against her forehead.

  "I have to go."

  "When will you be back?"

  He sighed and came around the bed to sit on the edge on her side.

  "I hope to be back tonight. If I'm not..." He frowned and took her hand. "If I'm not here, it's not because I don't want to be. It's because I can't come."

  "But..."

  He kissed her fingers.

  "In case anything would happen to me, I want you to know I love you."

  It was the first time he spoke about feelings, and she watched him in a state of near shock as he pulled his jacket on and left the room.

  He loves me.

  She finally got her body moving, pulled the sheet around her, and ran after him.

  "Jimmy, wait."

  He stood just inside the door and looked back with a quizzical expression on his face. She threw her arms around him.

  "I love you, too. Please be careful."

  "I'll try."

  Chapter Thirteen

  Jimmy rested the bike on the kickstand and looked at the club.

  They were on to him, he could feel it. He didn't have anything tangible, not enough to justify pulling the operation, but it was an insistent feeling.

  Maybe he was getting paranoid.

  Let's go in and get drunk, just what I need early in the morning. I wonder if I'm an alcoholic yet.

  As much as he wanted to get out of the job, he also dreaded telling the truth.

  What could he say? "Hey babe, you know the guy you fell in love with? He's not real. My name's Paul, and after a few years with these bikers I might need rehab. Wanna hook up?"

  What girl with any sanity and self-respect would say yes to that?

  No one, especially not her, but he couldn't keep pretending to be Jimmy forever.

  "Hey man, where've you been all night?"

  He hadn't even heard the door open. Dangerous slip.

  "With a girl. Needed some strange."

  The other man laughed, "Nothing's stranger than what we have here, but I hear ya."

  Jimmy stepped in and grabbed a beer from a cooler. Right now, Sharon would be having coffee. She probably sat in the sofa with her laptop.

  He loved watching her in that silky robe that fell open just enough to show the curve of her breasts. In a different life, he'd make her pancakes for breakfast.

  These thoughts needed to be buried, or they would give him away.

  A girl sauntered in from another room.

  She looks familiar. Who... Oh shit, it's the neighbor's cousin.

  He turned away. Maybe she wouldn't look too closely if she only saw his back. All their backs looked the same.

  "Hey, I know you."

  What were the odds?

  He turned slowly and made a point of looking her over, running a finger over her shoulder, down her neck, towards her breast.

  "I don't think so, but you can get to know me real well if you want."

  She slapped his hand away.

  "You're the pain in the ass guy who hangs with Frank's neighbor."

  He shook his head and reached around her to slap her butt.

  "Turns me on when you say ass."

  I'm so obnoxious you should walk away.

  The girl stood her ground and shook a cigarette out of a pack. It looked good. He shouldn't, but who cared anymore. The way this was going, smokes wouldn't have the time to kill him.

  "Hey, do you mind if I..."

  She slapped his fingers. "Yes, I do."

  "Okay, just sex then."

  People around them seemed much too interested. Someone said, "What's going on?"

  She raised her voice. "This dude, I know him. He knocked on my cousin's door one day to lecture me on how to raise my kids. Then, they took my babies away, saying a cop tipped them off."

  Jimmy made a dismissive gesture.

  "Never saw this bitch before." He inched himself closer and stared into her eyes. "I can give you new babies." Pulling a finger down her cleavage, he added, "We could go make one right now."

  People were crowding in. They weren't buying it.

  Damn it all to hell. She knows where Sharon lives. I should have warned her.

  Chapter Fourteen

  To Sharon the hours crawled by, and by the time it seemed late enough to at least call Mona, an entire week could have passed.

  Mona said, "He might just be melodramatic, but if he crossed those guys, he's dead."

  "But why..."

  "Honey, I'm coming over."

  Wow, I think she takes this more seriously than I do.

  Mona was quick; she knocked on the door twenty minutes later, and still had the time to pick up coffee. "Hold this."

  Sharon
obeyed, taking the mugs, and lifted an eyebrow when her friend returned to the car to get a large duffle bag.

  "What's that?"

  "I might be overreacting, but I will be staying here with you until Jimmy comes back. If he comes back."

  "I love to have you, but you don't look like this is a social call."

  Her friend unzipped the bag with a smirk. It held her guns along with a machete.

  "What... Why?"

  Mona snatched her coffee cup. "You are a sweet girl and you're not prepared for this. I'm not either, but more than you. Do you still have my Glock?"

  "Yes, but..."

  "Good. Keep it close."

  "They're not gonna come here, they don't even know I exist."

  "Hopefully you're right, and then we won't have any problems. Look, I've gotta go to work, but I'll be back here as soon as I get off. Until then, lie low, keep the Glock with you, and hope your boyfriend shows up."

  "You brought enough guns to start a war. I've never seen Jimmy with a gun."

  Mona shrugged, "Well... I don't know about him, but many of these guys have already been to prison once or twice. That means one more strike and they go away for good. They have weapons, probably enough for a small army. They probably sell them too, I mean, there's a lot of money going around."

  "But..."

  "They probably keep the big guns hidden in the back, or buried in the forest. For smaller skirmishes, these guys can kill someone just fine with whatever's lying around the house."

  For normal skirmishes with other men, and we're just two girls. Great. Just great. An army of crazed people able to beat someone to death with a shoe might have captured my boyfriend.

  "Unless they go to war, of course."

  "War?"

  "Yes. With another gang, or someone who betrayed them."

  *****

  Jimmy woke up with a terrific headache.

  What happened? Where the hell am I?

  The room was dark and smelled from dying animals, their fear fused with the very floor. His searching fingers found chicken wire.

  A dog cage. Great.

  He could just as well have been on the moon, there was no way out. Some dogs tried to chew themselves to freedom, but only managed to hurt their mouths. If those powerful jaws couldn't break through the cage, his shaking hands wouldn't be able to. He was weak and queasy, and the stench didn't help much.