Fallen Angel (Gabriel and Kadie Book 1)

by Tamsin Baker

  I frowned. What a horrible childhood to have. How had she come out so well balanced, so kind? My fingers tightened in the bedspread but I made sure not to say anything. Instead, I tilted my head to the side.

  “All right,” I murmured, “then that would explain your lack of knowledge, I suppose. But why didn’t you try to find other Witches to teach you once you figured out you were special? I’m sure your powers weren’t a secret.”

  She grimaced. “They weren’t,” she agreed. “In fact, they cropped up at the most inopportune moments. It was difficult for me to control them. So I did try to seek out help. When I was a teenager, I found that I could make that white light happen, especially when I was really scared. My foster mother was scared of me and kept her distance. She needed someone to watch the other foster kids for free, otherwise I’d have been gone.” Wrinkles appeared in her forehead and I could feel the bitterness brimming off of her in slow waves. “After that, I learned to hide it. Then I moved to New York and thought I’d be able to find others like me, but there aren’t any! I joined a coven, or so they said. But none of them had any real powers. They just liked to chant and carry on. I wanted to learn how to use my power, and I’ve been practicing how to control it for a long time. Mostly just to protect myself against people, men especially. I’ve had a few of them jump me in the evenings, on my way home.”

  I hope they’re burning in hell somewhere.

  This time, I moved my hand over hers, the one that picked at her robe. She stilled against my skin and finally looked up at me. Those ice-blue eyes paralyzed me. Everything about her was magic. “I bet they regretted that decision,” I said.

  She shrugged. “Yeah, a little. The light didn’t work so well against men. It would push them back, but not really hurt them.” I turned her over so I could start caressing her palm. It was surprisingly soft for the type of difficult life she had. I wondered if the warmth that thrummed from her skin was something innately her or was because of the powers that lived inside of her. “So, I didn’t understand why I had it if I couldn’t use it to protect myself. Until tonight, it’s never really done any damage.”

  I set aside the fact that Kadie had been followed home by strange men and couldn’t do much to protect herself. The thought unto itself caused my anger to flare but I curbed it down knowing she was safe now, knowing I was her beside her and had no intention of leaving anytime soon. Instead, I focused on what she said about her powers. Strange that they didn’t protect her unless she was attacked by Demons. My brain began to whirl faster. This was special. “Your light could be a Demon specific fighting power but that’s.... so rare. I’ve never even heard of anything like this myself, Kadie.”

  Not that I had infinite knowledge. I’d need to speak to Tabitha about this.

  “Really?” Her eyebrows rose on her forehead. I couldn’t tell if she was dreading what I meant or if it made her hopeful. I wanted it to be the latter, but humans had a knack for fearing their God-given talents, even if it was something odd like white light coming from her body.

  “Really. And if those things ever come at you again, blast them back to Hell. You got it?’ I leaned in close to her so our noses were brushing, grinning at her.

  Her lips lifted into the first smile I’d seen in an hour. “Yes, Gabriel.”

  I reached over and opened her robe, exposing the creamy globes of her breasts and the pink tips that cried out for my lips. I pulled her closer and sent up prayers of forgiveness. I would love this woman tonight, and every moment I could, until the day they made me leave again. And I would regret absolutely nothing about it.

  After all, what would be greater punishment than leaving her, now that I’d finally found some peace?

  I SPENT THE NEXT SIX days following Kadie’s every move, day and night. Watching her at work during the day, interacting with the children in her care, and holding her through the dark of night. I never took her time with me for granted, and continued to explore her body like it was new to me, like I was some kind of archeologist and she was some kind historical find that I didn’t think I’d ever fully discover but would die trying. Those moments between us meant more to me than she knew, more to me than I had ever expected.

  I didn’t see a single sign of the Demons again. We’d set her up one night to see if we could draw them out. At first, she wasn’t incredibly pleased by the prospect, but I asked her to trust me. If I knew what to expect, if I could see if Demons were still being assigned to her, I would be able to gage the best way to get rid of them without risking her. More than that, I would be able to see how they attacked her. Were they still trying to kill her outright? Or would they try some kind of torture tactic to ensure her soul went to Hell?

  That night, she walked through the streets of New York, alone, her hair unbound and blowing in the breeze. If they didn’t recognize her from that alone, the Demons were stupider than I gave them credit for. I kept a fair distance cloaked in my invisibility shield, trusting her to defend herself if necessary.

  And nothing except for some homeless person who seemed more interested in her money than anything else.

  When Tabitha called with another Target, I wasn’t surprised to find out I had to move on. It meant that the Demons were no longer a threat to Kadie and I could focus on another human to protect. This should have been a good thing. And it was. But leaving her was the last thing I wanted to do.

  It felt like I was falling from Heaven all over again. Losing the one I loved and being condemned to memories that would never match up to the short amount of time I had had with her.

  “I shouldn’t be disappointed to go, but I am,” I confided to her the day I received the message from Tabitha.

  I contemplated not saying anything to her, just to leave in the middle of the night when she was peacefully sleeping after a night of passionate love making. But I couldn’t do that. Not to her. I’d found during the days with Kadie, there was no point in keeping anything from my little Witch. She could read my mind whenever she wanted to, and with her kind soul, there was no reason to hide anything. I also thought it was important for me to be honest with her without her having to go through my thoughts to find it. I wasn’t exactly an open book, but what I could share, I would.

  Kadie laughed with that full-bodied sound that I’d begun to love and ran her hands along my arms. “You mean, you’re glad I’m no longer a Target?” she asked.

  I should have expected her to always look on the bright side even though I could feel my chest clamp down, like someone was sitting on me, preventing me from catching my breath. It was surprisingly painful, and something I didn’t particularly want to experience any longer.

  However, she was correct. I was glad she was no longer a target. That’s for certain. “Yes, very much so,” I admitted. “But I don’t wish to leave you. I’ve enjoyed our time together so much, I don’t know how I’m going to go back to my old life now.”

  “Perhaps you could stay one more night?” she asked, her eyebrows lifting in a suggestive way. The way she bit her bottom lip after she said it made every muscle in my body tighten. I didn’t understand how she could get me so hard without even touching me. Perhaps it was part of her magic. Either way, it made her dangerous – how she could render an angel such as myself completely and utterly helpless.

  That look tugged at my heart strings, but I ruthlessly squashed such fanciful feelings. We’d already had more nights together than we should have had. I could feel the effect on me already, weakening the wall I had built up around my heart because I so desperately wanted to let her in.

  And even if I did choose to stay, foregoing the task assigned to me, what would the outcome be? A human lifetime with my beautiful Witch, and then an eternity in damnation? Alone once again because Kadie would certainly go to Heaven unless her relationship with me had damned her soul to Hell. I couldn’t risk such a thing for her soul. I would not allow the temptation of pleasure and happiness prevent her from seeking the glory she deserved in her afterlife
. And me, walking this earth, saving souls, knowing I would probably never be given the same opportunity as I had been.

  And that was if I was allowed to live after I’d turned my back on my Fallen Angel duties. That was never a certainty. The Supreme Creator and the laws He made were always changing. It was hard to predict what was acceptable and what was not depending on the circumstances.

  “No, Kadie,” I said. “We’ve already put ourselves in enough danger. I should go.” I stood. I needed to put space between us lest she tempt me with that swollen lip, the way her eyes darkened when she wanted me.

  Her lush bottom lip trembled. “Does that mean I’ll never see you again?”

  I shook my head. Not a chance. “I’ll be back when I can. I’m always around New York.”

  This, at least, was the truth. I couldn’t stay away from her, that much I knew, even though I probably should.

  “Good. I couldn’t stand not being able to see you again, Gabriel.” She continued to touch me in that lazy, affectionate way she had, and I steeled myself against the warm, flowing energy.

  This woman was far too addictive for my own good.

  “You know I can’t abandon my Targets to come to you whenever I would like, Kadie,” I told her, my voice as tight as my body. Everything in me was tense, restraining myself from taking her against her bedroom wall and hearing her cry out in pleasure. My cock throbbed painfully. Who needed an eternity of damnation when resisting Kadie was more painful than anything else? “I’m on Earth for one purpose—to save those destined for Heaven from falling into Hell.”

  I tried to put some strength into my words, to give her something to cling to, as I had. A bigger purpose. Certainly, someone as good and as kind could respect that. I knew she would.

  Her lips turned up into a perfect smile. “I know you do, Gabriel. Humans like me. I will never forget what you’ve done for me this week.”

  She went up on her tip-toes and kissed me, those perfect, sweet lips pressing against mine in the softest caress. Lust stirred in my loins even more as I broke away from the woman who had, in a very short time, become home. A word I never thought I’d keep in my vocabulary after what happened before.

  “I have to go.” I took a step back. I could already feel myself wanting to go to her, to take her in my hands and trace the curves of her body once more.

  “I know,” she groaned and let go of my hoodie where she’d gripped me and I hadn’t noticed. Cold instantly swept my body the moment I lost her touch. The pain was remarkable and had me gasping for breath.

  Kadie stared up at me with her clear blue eyes. “If I never see you again, Gabriel, I want you to know...I’m grateful for everything you’ve done for me.”

  I opened my mouth to refute her claim. Of course, we would see each other again! And soon. But I stopped myself from making a promise I couldn’t keep. No one knew what the future held, not even me. I knew I’d fight the fires of hell itself and risk charred wings to make sure we would. If it killed me, so be it.

  “Good bye for now, beautiful little Witch.”

  I touched her cheek with my fingertips one last time, memorizing the love I could see in her gaze. I didn’t know if I would ever see it again. I didn’t know if I wanted it in anyone else. If I could not have Kadie, being alone was preferable.

  Then I stepped outside her purple front door and turned away from her, slipping into invisibility. The city held no allure for me today. I didn’t want to walk among the people, as I once had.

  Sadness crept along my soul, chilling me like the falling of snow. I recognized it in a way that you do an old friend you haven’t seen in many years.

  It had been centuries since I’d felt an emotion like it. My heart ached, tight and uncomfortable. But there was nothing for it, except to push past the feeling and get back to work.

  You’ll be back, I reminded myself. You’ll be back.

  I extended my wings and let them pull me up into the air and forwards, into my lonely journey here on Earth.

  Chapter 7.

  The minute I was in the sky, an address appeared in my head. I knew that was where I needed to go in order to find my next Target.

  I’m on my way, Tabitha, thank you.

  Good, this one is being stalked every night. He’s terrified, so be wary.

  I nodded, though she couldn’t see me, and flew to the hospital where I’d been directed. I did have one advantage over these Demons. Being able to access my Targets during the day meant that I kept a lot more of them alive.

  I felt good having something to do. Kadie was still in my thoughts more than I’d prefer, but at least this renewed my sense of purpose and reminded me why I was here. At the end of the day, I helped Kadie. I got to love her with my heart and my body. I would never forget what she had done for me. And I would try to see her again.

  But protecting a Target was a good distraction from the heartbreak, from the way her scent still lingered on my skin and the way her lips touched my cheek.

  I flew up to the rooftop of the tall building and there he stood, my Target. Standing on the ledge of a two-hundred foot building. About to jump.

  No. Don’t do it. Don’t let them win.

  He couldn’t see me, and I kept it that way on purpose.

  He must be in a lot of pain to feel so strongly about taking his own life. Many angels so this as proof of a human’s weakness. To a degree, I agreed with this assessment until I spent time among them. Humans did not have easy lives. Those who still looked at each new day with a hopeful smile were strong, those like Kadie. To have Demons add to the despair made it impossible to resist the temptation of death. I no longer believed those who contemplated taking their own lives as weak, though those who overcame such thoughts were strong.

  I flew up further into the sky and moved around to the space in front of him so I could catch him if he jumped. Not a preferred choice to interfere with the natural order like that, but with Demons in his head, the man could be forgiven for wanting to end his life.

  He still couldn’t see me, which was something I’d wanted to test. I’d thought that maybe my Targets would be able to see me in my invisibility since Kadie had, but once again, this situation simply proved her the exception. It just made the magic she possessed that much more intriguing. What else could she do, exactly?

  But I could not think about Kadie now. I needed to focus on my target.

  The man, Dr. Terence Winters, stared at the cement below as though it held all the answers to his life’s problems. Which unfortunately, if he was being terrorized by Demons, would only be the start of his torment.

  He leaned forward, his grey suit flapping in the breeze.

  I could feel his fear. The palpitations of his heart inside his thin chest. The sweat on his palms. The tickle at the base of his spine.

  No. Not today, Doctor.

  I flew forward and picked him up by the arms. He shrieked and tried to fight me but I held tight and carried him to the center of the rooftop before setting him down and releasing my hold on my invisibility. He stared up at me and fell backwards onto his ass, scampering across the concrete like a frightened crab.

  “What the hell are you?” He gaped at me and I flexed my wings, knowing he couldn’t see them. Not like Kadie had.

  I shook my head, trying to rid her of my thoughts. How could this be so impossible. I forced a chuckle at his frightened question, hoping it would help me refocus. An unusual response for me, but hey, my world was a little upside down at the moment. “The answer is much closer to Heaven than Hell, Dr. Winters. I am Gabriel, your Guardian Angel, and I’m here to save your life today.”

  He blinked several times and then stared at me. I watched his face pale and read the emotion in his eyes: awe, denial, doubt, reasoning, and then, finally, acceptance.

  I smiled as gently as I could. “I’m real. I’m not going to disappear.”

  “I don’t understand,” he whispered, his heart still racing dangerously fast. I could hear the flutterin
g in my ears like a caged canary. He needed to calm down or he’d be in danger of a real heart attack.

  I squatted down and tucked my wings in behind me so that I could look at him from where he still sat on the concrete. “I was called to save you from the Demons chasing you,” I said. I made sure my voice was low and soothing. If he could get over his fear just to hear what I had to say, perhaps his body would start to calm down. “I know you’ve had some horrible nightmares and feel like the only way out is to plunge to your death off this roof.”

  The doctor’s mouth opened and closed several times, like a fish. Finally, he said, “How did you know that?” He was still sitting on the concrete, looking up at me with a mixture of awe and fear. I could tell he was still deciding whether or not to trust me, whether or not I was part of his imagination or something out of his nightmares sent to haunt him even further. I did not know how to ease his trepidation, but I reminded myself that it was not my job to do so. He needed to find his faith and trust me if he was going to overcome the Demons.

  “I know, because I’m the Guardian Angel sent here to save you,” I said. “Believe me, you don’t want to take your own life.”

  “Why not?” The poor man sounded defeated, hopeless, as though there was nothing else he could think to do besides this.

  Most people asked me this question. About half the time, the answer was enough to make my Targets fight for their lives. “Because when you take your own life, the Demons that have been torturing you win. They get to drag you straight down to Hell. That’s not where you’re meant to go, Dr. Winters. If it was, I wouldn’t be here.”

  Tears gathered in his grey eyes, making them appear glassy, like marble. “I’ve done some terrible things.” He looked away and a tear crawled down his cheek. His lips trembled before he set them in a tight, white line, as though he was remembering.