Monster Hunter International

by Larry Correia

  "He didn't hit me. Too slow," Franks stated.

  "I'll try harder next time," I gasped.

  "Look forward to it."

  "Get off this property now before I have you arrested," Myers ordered. Harbinger put his arm over my shoulders and led me away. We walked down the driveway, more like my boss walked and I weaved. My head was throbbing, my eyes were watering, my nose and lips were bleeding, my chest and stomach burned in pain, and I felt at least two broken teeth with my tongue. I had not gotten my ass handed to me in a one-on-one fight like that since I was fifteen.

  He waited until we were well away from the helicopters and perimeter of armed guards before speaking. "Good stall. Not exactly the tactic I would have used, but letting Franks beat you up was great."

  "I didn't let him."

  "Good job anyway." He pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and handed it to me. I held it tightly under my nose.

  "So what was the purpose of that little exercise?" I asked. "What was I stalling for?"

  "I was trying to listen in on Myers' phone call. He was standing right in the living room."

  "Do you have superpowers or something?"

  "Nope. I just have good senses," he smiled. "And I know how to pay attention."

  "So did you hear anything?"

  He was quiet for a long moment as we crunched our way down the long gravel lane. "Not really. He was talking way too softly. And there were helicopters overhead."

  "So I took a beating for nothing?"

  "Pretty much. But it was entertaining."

  We called for help and Milo retrieved us an hour later with the jacked-up Chevy. We drove south in silence. Our mission was at a dead end. The Feds were running us off. Harbinger was in a bad mood as we stopped for gas in a small town. Milo apologized, but apparently the newly purchased truck got about three miles to the gallon.

  Back at the Radio City Motor Lodge, the rest of the Hunters were not particularly thrilled either. The ten of us were gathered in our improvised command center, sweltering in the humidity. I passed the time by flicking pennies at the roaches scurrying up the walls. A few of the bugs were big enough that they shrugged off the impacts and one particularly impressive specimen even latched onto the coin and kept it.

  "This is bullshit!" Sam said as he kicked a hole in the sheetrock.

  "If we took all of them down it would be the biggest PUFF bounty in history," Boone added. "Seven high-level bloodsuckers, and we would be set for life."

  "Myers doesn't bluff. We're on thin ice as it is." Julie was the voice of reason. "We have to go home."

  "I don't like it at all, people, but we ain't got much choice. We're leaving. Boone and Priest can head back to Atlanta. You can take whatever gear that don't fit in the Hind."

  "I'm short handed, Earl. I'm down a man, and it's going to be a while before the other guys are healed up," he said.

  "You guys earned the vacation. Spend some time with your families. Get some rest. We won't send any missions your way until your team is up and running. As for short-handed, you want some Newbies? I think we can consider these graduated from basic training."

  The Atlanta team leader critically studied Chuck, Holly, Trip and me. It reminded me of when we used to pick teams in grade school. I sucked my stomach in and tried to look tough. He looked each of us in the eye individually, and nodded in satisfaction.

  "Earl. I would be honored to have any of them. From what I understand each one of them did good on that freighter, and that was some hairy shit. If they can keep it together through that, they'll be just fine. I've been running with only five men, and five is a pretty small team to start with. I would take them all if you would let me." I took that as quite the compliment.

  "I can't spare them. I'm going to need to spread them around. I've got other short-handed teams, and we need to put together a new team based in the intermountain west. Sam's gonna lead that one."

  Sam quit angrily putting holes in the walls long enough to stammer something in surprise. I believe that he used the F word as noun, verb and adjective all in the same sentence.

  "Team Haven?" he said. "No way."

  "We need another team. You're the best man for the job. Congratulations," Harbinger said. The former SEAL slowly sat on one of the beds in shock. Milo patted him on the back. The rest of us voiced our congratulations. "We'll work out the logistics and the details when we get back to the compound. I've got to spread around my experienced people."

  "Good for you, Sam. You'll do fine. As good as any Navy guys can be expected at least. So who do I get?" Boone said.

  "I could send you Grant," Harbinger suggested.

  "Only if you give me Pitt too. Grant would end up at the bottom of the Chattahoochee within a week. I could deal with that," Boone said. He grimaced as Julie slugged him hard in the arm.

  "Roberts was a gunman. You need a gunman. You get Mead. I watched him shoot that SAW on that freighter and he was hell on wheels. He'll do you proud."

  "Aw, shucks," said our big simple Ranger.

  "Chuck, say hello to your new boss. Don't screw up."

  "Yes, sir!" he shouted. Boone shook his hand, welcoming him aboard.

  "Okay. Now for the rest of us, here's the deal. We're leaving, but we ain't quitting this case. We keep working our sources. We put out the word to every team, every informant, and every sewer-dwelling mutant out there. As soon as these things show up on the radar we're going to nail them. I'll call in every single Hunter in the country if necessary. Feds be damned. We started this and we're gonna finish it."

  "So if we do track them down and destroy them, how do we keep from losing our charter?" Milo asked. "I mean, if we get them, won't the Feds just shut us down for nosing in on their case?"

  "Not if we just 'blunder' into the seven while we're working on something else."

  "Groovy."

  We were dropped off at the little airport. The sun was gradually setting over the Georgia countryside and mosquitoes and little evil gnats swarmed over our bodies. The Hind was prepped, and we made our way toward it, carrying duffel bags and heavy cases. The airport manager sat in a lawn chair in front of his little rusted trailer, an old gray dog curled at his feet. He waved at us lazily.

  I was at the rear of the group, lugging a heavy wooden crate filled with all manner of controlled destruction. The big guy always gets to carry the heavy stuff. Julie broke away from the others and stopped in my path.

  "Owen, we need to talk for a second."

  "Sure," I grunted as I set the crate on the ground.

  "First off, I appreciate all of the hard work that you have done. And I really appreciate you risking your life to save me and the others. That was very brave."

  "Look Julie, I'm sorry, but—" She cut me off.

  "But what you did with Grant was over the line."

  "You can stick up for your boyfriend all you want, but he left me behind. He left me to get killed by Darné." My cheeks flushed hotly in sudden anger. I wasn't about to be told that what I had done was wrong.

  "I know. That wasn't right, but Earl will deal with it. Not you."

  "Wait a second. You're mad because I stepped outside my authority, and not because I punched out your boyfriend?" I was confused.

  "And you threw him into shark-infested waters, don't forget the shark part. Your temper will get you killed in this job. It only takes one stupid decision to get you or your team killed. You need to keep the emotions in check."

  "Like you," I said pointedly.

  "I guess." There was a long and uncomfortable pause. "Look, I just . . . I don't want you to get hurt. You seem to do that a lot already." She lightly touched my bruised and swollen face. Her fingertips were surprisingly gentle. "Damn. Franks really did give you a beating."

  "I am sorry. I'm not sorry about hitting Grant or even the swimming with sharks part, but I'm really sorry about . . . you know. I don't want you mad at me." I took a deep breath. "I felt like I betrayed you, and that's what I'm sorry for."
<
br />   "I'm fine, but I've got one request. Stay out of my business. What happens between me and Grant is between me and Grant. Not you, not Earl, not Milo, or Sam or anybody else who feels the need to harass me about it. I know how you guys see him, but I know him better than that. I'm sure he had a reason for what he did."

  "Are you going to dump him?" I asked, suddenly hopeful. "Because he panicked and left me behind?"

  "What did I just say?"

  "Stay out of your business?"

  "Right." She must have realized that her fingers were still on my cheek as she reflexively snatched them away. She lowered her voice to just barely over a whisper. "Owen, look . . . I know that . . . well, I know how you feel, and I—

  "Brother of War Chief!" Skippy rumbled as he interrupted her. He was still covered from head to foot, the mirrored visor of his flight helmet was down, showing only my reflection. I was a little perturbed. Skip, you have lousy timing.

  The pilot fell to his knees and bowed again, until his helmet hit the ground. "Hind is . . . she ready to fly . . . Noble One." His voice sounded like rocks being poured into a cement mixer. He sprang quickly to his feet.

  "Noble One . . . no carry . . . he no carry." He made that horrible noise that represented his real name as he grabbed the handles of the heavy crate and bucked it up onto his knees. He clucked when I tried to take it from him. "Skip carry . . . Bring honor to tribe."

  The black-garbed pilot waddled with the heavy load toward the waiting chopper. Julie's brown eyes were wide behind her glasses. I shrugged. It didn't make a lick of sense to me either.

  "Noble One? What the hell? He's not your own personal porter, Owen," she said as she turned and stalked away. The moment was gone.

  I took one last look at the sunset, swatted a mosquito, muttered something suitably profane, and followed Skippy, who was once again trying in vain to sing. It sounded particularly horrible when he tried to grumble-hum the sounds of the instruments.

  "Hold pig steady . . . dum dum dum . . . ra ra ra . . . yeah. Pig. Pig! PIG!"

  Chapter 12

  That night I slept in my comfortable and familiar bed at the MHI compound. The barracks were clean and roach free. I passed out within minutes of getting home.

  My dreams were confusing. I saw an enormous cargo plane take off from an airfield somewhere far in the bleak north. It was a giant, unfamiliar, four-engined monstrosity, bellowing smoke and noise. Inside, the plane was packed with boxes, cargo and even some recently butchered livestock. A man stood near the rear door of the huge cargo plane. He did not need to hold onto anything, despite the uneven vibrations and turbulence, and I knew that he would stand the entire long trip. Unmoving, arms folded, legs wide, thick fur cloak covering most of his features, black eyes staring unceasingly in the direction of his destination.

  His face was a mass of black tattoos, giving the illusion of a leering skull. In my dream the ink on his skin moved.

  * * *

  I got back from Montgomery in time to catch most of the meeting. The dentist had fixed my two broken teeth. Half of my face was numb and tingly with Novocain and I could not help but poke at my cheeks to feel the weird pressure. They were using the conference room from my dream. All of the experienced Hunters were there, including Raymond Shackleford III himself. The few Newbies, who it had been felt were ready for action, were sitting around the huge wooden table. Holly Newcastle smiled and gave me a little wink as I tried to sneak in. I sat as far away from Grant as I could. Grant and his nose bandage studiously ignored me.

  Julie was speaking. She stood at the head of the table to give her briefing. "Dr. Jonas Turley was considered one of the premier experts on the religion, art and history of the ancient civilizations of this continent. He wrote over twenty books on those subjects, and has done research and been a major part of archeological digs from Alaska to Argentina. I got to hear him speak once at in Birmingham. The man knew his stuff."

  "So why did the bad guys go directly to his house and beat him and his wife to death? They tore apart all of his possessions looking for something, something important. I've got an idea as to what." She let slip a brief moment of pride as she made us wait for the answer. "While Pitt was bluffing that he was going to blow up the Antoine-Henri, Darné said that this Lord Machado had some sort of artifact and that he was going to take it to a Place of Power to use it. Dr. Turley had done a lot of research concerning ancient religious sites. His last book was about that very subject, and the word in the academic community was that his next paper was going to be an exhaustive catalog of sites and what their importance was. My theory is that the bad guys went to his house for information. They are looking for a particular place, this 'Place of Power,' so they can use their artifact."

  "What does this artifact do?" the senior Shackleford asked.

  "I'm the historian; ask the psychic." She pointed at me.

  "I'm no psychic. I just have a strange old Jewish man that visits me in my dreams and takes me on wild and crazy adventures—hey, that sounds like a children's book."

  "What does the artifact do?" repeated the head boss patiently.

  "I don't really know. But I was told that the evil comes. The Cursed One will bring it. We stop it if we can, if not time will die."

  "Time will die?"

  "That's what the Old Man told me. I saw a storm coming. It brought Armageddon with it."

  "I see. That would probably be bad. Carry on, Jules," Mr. Shackleford ordered.

  Julie continued, "We need to figure out what this Place of Power is. Then we can get there first and set a trap."

  "For seven Master vamps? How are we going to pull that off?" Sam asked. "We got any nuclear weapons stashed?"

  "Well, actually—ouch!" Milo started to speak and Harbinger painfully kicked him under the table. Whoa. I had no idea what we had stashed in the basement, but I wasn't even willing to consider that. I forcefully banished the thought of Milo Anderson armed with a thermonuclear weapon out of my brain.

  "We will think of something, but right now we need to gather information. We need to find out where Turley's places are, and which one is the right one. We need to keep an ear out for any sign of these monsters, and we need to keep searching the archives until we find out who Lord Machado is and what this artifact does."

  "No luck with the search yet," Albert Lee told us. In the last few days he had become our unofficial librarian. "There are a lot of books down there, and no offense, but your cataloging system absolutely sucks."

  "And a lot of the archives got burned in '95," Sam said.

  "About '95? When do we get to hear the story?" I asked.

  Harbinger shook his head. "We'll get to it, but later."

  "There is one person who knows all the stories in the archives better than anybody," Milo suggested. "We could go ask him. If anybody would know who Lord Machado is, it would be him."

  The experienced Hunters gave each other incredulous looks. Milo's suggestion went over like a lead balloon.

  "No way," Harbinger ordered with some force.

  "I forbid it," Mr. Shackleford said.

  "Milo, don't be stupid," Julie snapped. She visibly paled at whatever the red-bearded man was suggesting. I had never seen anything shake her like that before.

  "But if this artifact is really going to end time or blow up the world or whatever, don't you think it is worth the risk?" Milo argued. "This isn't just a normal case. We're talking about some serious stuff. He's mad at all of us, but he would talk to Julie."

  "But I don't want her to talk to him. He's dangerous," Harbinger stated flatly.

  "Earl, he's still her dad. He wouldn't try to hurt her."

  "I've got ninety-seven dead Hunters that say otherwise. End of discussion, Milo. Don't bring it up again."

  Milo leaned back in his chair and rested his palms on the table. "Fine. Forget I said anything. Just don't blame me when the world blows up." The conference room was uncomfortably silent. Julie just stared at her hands. And I had thought that my
family had problems.

  "We do have other options." Harbinger broke the silence. "We can talk to Turley's colleagues. See if any of them know anything about a Place of Power. He had to confide in somebody. We'll need to be discreet though, or the Feds will find out. When I called and told them about the seven vampires, they knew right where to go."

  "They could have tracked us there," I said. "The Hind does stick out a bit."

  "Possibly, but I don't want to assume that. Even if they did, they're probably in the same boat we are and they will be interviewing the same people. Word gets back to Myers and we're screwed."

  "We could knock Pitt out, and see if he has any more dreams," Grant offered.

  "Or I could try to divine the future with your entrails. I hear that works with chickens," I replied. He glared at me. Julie shook her head in resignation. I had never promised to play nice.

  "There are some other sources we can go to though. There are others out there who are more in touch with . . . uh, I guess you would say the magical world and all of this Place of Power mumbo jumbo. Or if Lord Machado is evil enough, they may even be able to sense his location," Milo suggested. "We could pay a visit to the Elf Queen."

  "Not a bad idea. If we bring a good enough offering she may speak to us," Julie said.

  "Whoa. Back up. Wait just a minute. Are you trying to tell me there are really elves?" Trip said.

  "Yes, Trip. There are elves," she told him. I refrained from asking if they lived in a magic tree and made delicious cookies.

  "Like as in J.R.R. Tolkien elves?" Trip asked again. His eyes lit up in wonderment like a kid who still believed in Santa on Christmas morning.

  "Old JR was quite the character. He learned from a few British Hunters who knew their stuff. Always hanging around them and picking their brains about languages and whatnot," the senior Shackleford wheezed. "He did tend to romanticize things a bit in his writing, however."

  "I can't believe it," Trip told us. "It's just that this whole time all I've learned about is horrible ugly things. Evil things and dead things that hurt people. I mean I understand that our job is to fight them, so we have to know them, but I didn't know that there were good and magical things too. This is great!"