A creaky door opened, and Thayne looked down the hallway. Laura stepped from her room, wearing tight blue jeans and a black and silver sparkly shirt. The jeans hugged her curvy hips and the sparkles on her shirt brought attention to her fantastic chest. When she walked toward him, her hips swayed enticingly, and Thayne chewed on the inside of his cheek.
For a woman wanting to be just friends, she sure was making things hard on him. He wanted to tackle her, push her up against the wall, run his hands over her curves, and plunder her mouth with his tongue. The desire to do so was almost too much, and Thayne forced himself to concentrate on her beautiful face instead.
That only made him want to kiss the cute dimple in her chin, however, so it wasn’t much of a distraction.
He cleared his throat and stood next to the table, holding a chair out for her. “Dinner is served, but I have to say, you look good enough to eat.”
Red colored her cheeks as she sat in the chair and allowed him to push it in. “I haven’t had many friends tell me that before.”
“That’s too bad.” Thayne took the chair next to her and cracked the seal on the water, pouring it into their glasses. “You’ve been hanging with some lame friends.”
The food wasn’t as hot as he hoped, since Laura had been late getting home, but when Thayne cut into his steak, it was juicy and tender beneath his knife.
“This looks great, Thayne.” Laura propped her elbow on the table, resting her chin in her hand as she stared at him. “I figured you’d bring takeout or something. I didn’t know you could cook.”
“Wait until you taste it. I used my dad’s secret sauce. No one could grill like that man, and I learned everything I know from him.”
“Could?” Laura’s eyes narrowed and she bit her lower lip. “Is he...?”
“Gone,” Thayne confirmed. “For almost four years.”
Compassion filled her big blue eyes and she rested her hand lightly against his arm. “I’m so sorry. It’s hard to lose someone you love.”
It sounded like she knew something about that, which might have to do with her dating rules. “Loss is a part of life,” he said, trying to sound philosophical and not bitter. “Dad worked on a crabbing ship and went overboard in a storm. By the time they pulled him from the water, it was too late.”
She raised her hand to his cheek and stroked his skin with a gentle caress. “I’m sorry to hear that. How hard for your family.”
Thayne leaned into her touch a moment before making a conscious effort to snap himself out of it. That wasn’t the type of memory to share with her. He was trying to make a good impression and get a second date. Well, friendly outing. He needed to talk about happier times—and there were a lot of those with his dad.
“When Dad was off work and home, us men took care of dinner and gave Mom the month off. Dad taught me everything he knew.” That was safer and wouldn’t put Thayne in a bad mood. He’d loved those nights as a kid when his father was on leave and spending time with him. He wouldn’t trade it for the world. “If you think this steak is good, just wait until I make chicken. Dad’s secret sauce for that dish is the best. It has a kick to it.”
Laura turned her head to her plate and cut into her steak, seeming content to let the subject of his father’s death go without a big discussion about it. “I haven’t had much spice in my life lately.” She put a bite into her mouth.
Mesmerized, Thayne watched her chew, wishing he could get his mouth on those lips before the end of the night. “That’s why you need me around,” he mumbled, wondering if he was slightly brain dead from the lack of kissing and loving the last couple months while he pursued Laura. All he could think about was kissing her. “I’m plenty spicy and a whole lot of fun.”
To his relief, she giggled. “And none too subtle, either.”
“Hey, I’m a man who knows what he wants and goes after it. What’s so wrong with that?”
“Maybe I’m jealous because I wish I could be a little more like you,” she replied. “I’m scared of everything, and I don’t go out of my way to take chances anymore.”
“Anymore?”
She shook her head. “Never mind. It’s in my past.”
Thayne ate in silence, casting around for more conversation topics. She obviously wasn’t ready to tell him about her life. Heck, Thayne didn’t even know where she’d come from or if she’d ever been married. He didn’t know what was safe to ask her about, and the silence was getting uncomfortable. He was going to blow this chance.
“What made you become a firefighter?” she asked, throwing him a life preserver, so he didn’t drown.
Thayne latched on, relieved. “My grandfather ran the firehouse in his small hometown town for forty years. Loved it, and taught me to love it. Serving people is what I was born to do. There’s nothing more satisfying than saving a life.”
Laura nodded. “I can kind of understand, actually. It’s why I decided to be a vet tech once I rejoined the land of the living.” She glanced up, her eyes wide and lips pressed together.
Something she hadn’t meant to let slip. Well, Thayne would be gracious and let her get away with it for now. “Exactly. See, you understand me, Laura.” He grinned, not missing her relieved sigh when she realized he wouldn’t press the ‘land of the living’ comment. “You have the same love for animals that I do. I can see your passion for them every time I visit the clinic.”
Her eyebrows rose. “You mean every day when you visit?”
He worried she might actually be annoyed, but then she winked and Thayne grinned.
“You can’t blame a guy for getting hung up on you. It’s not my fault you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.” Not to mention sweet and kind, but he didn’t want to push his luck.
“Thayne, you can’t say that...” She trailed off and shrugged, apparently deciding not to argue further.
It pleased Thayne that the note of disapproval in her voice wasn’t as harsh as he expected. She was weakening.
He glanced at her plate and realized she hadn’t tried the steak sauce. “Hey, you can’t eat my food without trying Dad’s sauce.” He cut off a piece of his steak and dipped it in.
“I’m not big on sauces. I like the flavor of the steak itself. The spices you used are perfect.”
He shook his head, holding his hand beneath the fork and bringing it to her mouth. “This is perfect doubled. Come on, try it.”
Laura parted her lips, and Thayne fed her the steak, wishing he dared wrap his arm around her shoulder and hold her close while she chewed. This friend stuff was not his forte.
After swallowing, Laura nodded. “That is good. You and your father were culinary geniuses.”
He forced himself to lean away. “Told you.”
Dinner flew by way too fast for Thayne’s liking. Before he knew it, Laura was gathering their plates and thanking him for coming over.
He took the dishes from her hands. “Let me help with that.”
“You cooked. It’s okay,” she said. “I’m sure you have other places to be. Other friends to visit.”
Damn her. Why was she so insufferable? If he kissed her breathless, would she really force him to leave?
“You’re the only friend I want to see. I’m on call for work. Since I’m one of only three of us trained as a medic, I might get called away at some point if they get busy. But I don’t want to leave unless I have to.” He paused, tipping her chin upward with his free hand so she would look into his eyes. “Unless you’re kicking me out.”
She licked her lips, a sign he was quickly coming to recognize as her being nervous. “W-w-we could watch a movie.”
He loved her stutter any time she became nervous. It was charming and a change from the girls at the clubs who were always so sure of themselves and ready to hop on him the second they met.
“Good. You find something to watch, and I’ll put these in your dishwasher.”
Thayne turned to the kitchen before she could change her mind.
***
I don’t need the anti-anxiety pill. I don’t need it. This is fine. It’s fine.
Laura had been repeating the same thing to herself for the last half hour. Sitting next to Thayne on her small loveseat was a test of willpower. She tried to keep herself firmly on her side of the cushions, but the smaller she curled into the corner, the more Thayne spread out.
He smelled even better than earlier today, and his casual compliments striking at random times made her job tougher than before. It would be so nice to curl up under his arm and lay against his chest, watching the movie as a couple.
Friends cuddle, right?
She’d picked a comedy, hoping Thayne liked them. His hearty laugh filled the small apartment. He’d made himself right at home in her kitchen, and now seemed completely at ease on her couch. She wished she could just let herself relax. No more panic, no more worry, just enjoying a show with her friend.
Yeah, right. You don’t want to screw friends that you relax with. Not if they’re just friends.
She sighed, curling up even tighter when Thayne’s thigh touched hers again.
Kitty chose that moment to decide she was tired of the cat bed in the corner and sat on Thayne’s foot, meowing at him in a demanding tone.
Absently, Thayne picked her up, curling her against his chest. She balled up and rested against him, falling back to sleep in seconds.
“Looks like you have a fan,” Laura said. “Maybe she remembers you’re the one who rescued her. She looks comfortable.”
Thayne’s green eyes sparkled, and he put his other arm around the back edge of the couch behind Laura’s shoulders. “There’s still room to lean on this side if you want to be comfortable too.”
Boy, did she ever want to give in. It just couldn’t happen. “I think that’s too friendly, don’t you?”
He turned his attention to the TV. “Suit yourself.”
What? He’s so hot and cold. Does he really not care?
Laura laughed at herself. It was stupid to be upset that he did what she asked. It wasn’t his fault she put restrictions on the night and ended up making herself uncomfortable.
Suddenly, a police siren sounded from inside Thayne’s pocket, making Laura jump.
“Sorry,” he said, handing her Kitty. “That’s my ringtone for work. Loud, so I don’t ever miss it.” He pulled the phone from his pocket and swiped the screen, frowning. “Shi—shoot.”
“What’s wrong?” Her heart raced, and she felt her entire body vibrate with tension. Why did he have to have a police siren? She never wanted to think about police sirens again.
He leaned over to her so unexpectedly that she didn’t have time to react. Thayne placed a quick peck on her cheek and then kissed Kitty’s head. “I have to go. There’s an accident on First and Parsons and another call for a heart attack victim.”
He raced for the door, opening it before turning back. “I’ll come and see you tomorrow at work. I never got your phone number.”
The door shut, and Laura stayed where she was, shaking uncontrollably. Her hands went icy cold and sweat beaded on her forehead. Recognizing the signs that her panic was out of control, she struggled to breathe deeply and evenly.
Kitty meowed and then clawed her hand, and she realized she was squeezing the cat too hard. Carefully, she placed the kitten on the floor and then stumbled toward the bathroom, wondering if her heart would explode before she got there.
Laura fumbled open the medicine cabinet with shaking hands and managed to get the top off her prescription bottle. She dry swallowed the Xanax and then sank to the floor, hugging her knees to her body and crying uncontrollably.
This was why she couldn’t date him. This right here. She hadn’t needed one of her anti-anxiety pills in six months, always able to stave off the panic.
One not-date with the god Thor and she was back to the quivering, shaking, torn apart mess that she’d been before years of therapy and lots of antidepressants. She couldn’t do this.
Thayne ran into danger without hesitation, cop siren blaring and the excitement of saving lives fueling his passion. Just like Brian, even if they were in different professions.
She couldn’t be with Thayne. She couldn’t sit waiting every time he left her. Waiting for the inevitable knock on the door to tell her Thayne had been involved in an accident and was never coming back.
Going through that once in her life was enough. It nearly broke her... in fact, it did break her for a while. She couldn’t risk it.
She couldn’t see Thayne again.
Chapter Four
Thayne woke up, bleary-eyed after only a few hours of sleep on a firehouse cot. The night started hopping after he left Laura’s and the firehouse had little downtime—everyone on call as a reserve had to come in to help before the end of the night. At least Thayne had the image of Laura’s sweet face to lull him to sleep once he was finally able to lie down.
“Hey, partner. Time to get up.”
Thayne groaned and rolled over to see Frankie standing at the foot of the cot. “What do you mean by partner?”
“After you left last night for your dinner date, Captain Smith announced some changes in the house since they had to do those layoffs.” Frankie grinned. “You’ve spent too long chasing car crashes and rescuing lost kittens since Carl died. Those of us here less than a year drew names for new partners, pairing with the veterans, and I got you. We’ll be the best team in the city.”
Thayne scrubbed his hands through his hair, hoping he was still asleep and having a nightmare. After rubbing his eyes, Frankie still stood there, a stupid grin on his babyish face. The kid looked excited. Thayne had no clue why. He’d never done anything to encourage Frankie into believing they’d ever be anywhere close to friends.
Then again, Thayne knew the day he’d be forced back to actively fighting fires was approaching. He just hoped it wouldn’t be this soon.
With a grunt, he rolled off the bed. “Where’s Captain? I never agreed to you as a partner.”
Frankie punched his shoulder. “You don’t get a vote, buddy. You know all the departments are short-handed after budget cuts so a lot of us younger guys were brought on at lower wages. We need guidance. So, do you want to keep your job?”
Reluctantly, Thayne nodded.
Frankie cracked his knuckles, obviously satisfied. “Then I’m your new best friend, partner.”
Damn the budget cuts. The city of Sayle’s new mayor was determined to prove he could make a difference, save the citizens some tax money as promised during his campaign. What he wasn’t telling them was the cuts came by way of their safety. Wait until the first time a house caught on fire and there were no available engines to help, or the first time an ambulance wasn’t available to come to an accident. The mayor better have a good story then, or the town would be after his head.
It sucked that the firefighter’s union hadn’t been able to negotiate a better deal. Some of the finest firefighters Thayne ever had the pleasure to work with were out of a job—and he was left with the most annoying probie on the force.
“Damn it. I can’t believe the union didn’t do more.”
Frankie shrugged. “You know the kinds of threats the mayor made. There is only so much leverage you can have when he’s threatening to go private with the whole program.”
And that was another problem. What was up with people believing privatizing the fire stations would work? Sure, there were a few cities around the country doing it, but that didn’t mean it was a good idea for Sayle. Even though the union called for a town meeting when they first started negotiations, the people at large didn’t seem to worry too much about who fought their fires. They wouldn’t care until they needed someone and no one was there.
Then again, if the union couldn’t stop this travesty, there was nothing Thayne could do about it.
“I need coffee,” he said, deciding he’d have to be cordial to the little pipsqueak. Frankie was no Carl, and never would be, but if that was what Wi
lson Smith had decided was best for the department, Thayne would do it and not cause trouble.
“I’ll get it for you, buddy,” Frankie volunteered. “I know you had a few late calls last night, but don’t forget we have that community outreach event today. You might want to get cleaned up.”
Community outreach used to be one of Thayne’s favorite days. A few times a year they had an event for the city, teaching fire safety and telling kids what to do if caught in a fire. It awed the kids, so they listened, thus really helping save lives. After Carl had died, it was a chore to go to the event. How could he teach kids about fire safety when he hadn’t even managed to keep his partner alive?
Thayne headed for the bathroom, knowing he didn’t have a choice about going. It was part of his job. Frankie was right; he needed to shave and shower so as not to scare the children. “I take my coffee black.”
***
Come on, Thayne. Come through that door and let me know you’re safe after rushing from my apartment last night.
Laura held her breath every time the door to Sunshine Veterinarian Clinic opened, hoping it would be Thayne strolling through. So far, it was all pets and their owners. Where was he?
Once Laura emerged from her post-anxiety drug-induced haze of calmness, she realized that if something did happen to Thayne, no one would contact her. He could be lying in a hospital right now, and she’d never know.
“Busy day, today,” Vicky said, after saying goodbye to their last patient. “If this keeps up, we’ll have to get a receptionist soon. I hate leaving the front empty when we’re both tied up.”
Laura nodded, though she was only half listening. “That’ll be good.”
Vicky snapped her fingers in front of Laura’s face, drawing her attention from the glass doorway. “What’s with you today? You’ve been a zombie. Did things end badly with Thayne?”
Not yet. Not until I’m forced to end everything.
Laura pushed that thought away and shook her head. “He rushed out pretty quick because he was on-call last night and there was an emergency, but he did kiss me on the cheek.”
Blazing Love Page 3