Intrigue Me

by Lacee Hightower

  And wanting to play.

  The evening had begun with him not even bothering to take his pants off, only lowering his fly and pushing into me from behind with no foreplay, fucking me angrily as he viciously twisted and tugged my nipples. Then, he’d used a flogger on my inner thighs before taking me hard in the ass.

  I was still face-down as he stood at the foot of the bed looking like a sex god in faded black jeans with the fly still open, and nothing else, his chiseled waves of thick muscle tempting and taunting, while his eyes raked over me, glowing with lust. My inner thighs were still on fire and my entire lower body felt shredded and violated. He crawled in behind me and circled his arms around my chest, pinching at my nipples that already ached in a way they never had before. Another bout of extreme fatigue hit me hard. My eyes were suddenly heavy, and a dire, weak feeling had me almost incoherent. Since early this morning, I had been fighting off and on spells of more burning in my chest and a bitter stabbing sensation deep in my abdomen, not knowing what was causing either. Honestly, I just felt like I needed twelve long hours of good solid sleep.

  “Don’t,” I whimpered, my body straining as his grip on my nipples tightened to the point of hellish agony.

  Dammit, why did I say that? He wasn’t going to accept me calling the shots in bed—not today in his mood—and although I’d pleaded earlier, successfully, not to use the wicked clamps I referred to as The Bastards on my more than normally tender breasts, he released me and rolled off the bed. I knew at that moment that he was going to get the evil, tortuous devices that I hated … and loved.

  “I love you, Tage,” I uttered softly, unsure what possessed me to say that. Tears brimmed my eyes, cavernous emotion racking my body.

  “Not gonna work, kitten,” he uttered with a concise shake of his head.

  He returned with the abominable torture devices from hell—The Bastards—shaking his head with a gesture of displeasure. Heavy sobs rose up my chest, tears sliding from both eyes. “I do, Tage. I always have. I always will. Even if you can’t return my feelings.”

  He yanked my hair so viciously that my whole body clenched. “For once, just close your fucking trap, Ava. I’m not in the mood for your compassion. And definitely not your crocodile tears.”

  I cried out as the evil, unbearable liquid fire of pain streamed all the way through my toes.

  “They stay on for eight minutes.”

  Please no. I love you. Don’t hurt me anymore. Not today.

  “Hummingbird.”

  My legs were shaking, my heart thumping. Sweat ran down my brow as my stomach knotted wretchedly. I gulped in air, trying to breathe through the sob in my chest, the movement only making the clamps hurt worse. “S—something’s wrong.”

  For an instant, he held my gaze, his eyes unreadable as helplessness clouded his features. Confusion and fear were etched in his face as my words sank in. I could almost tell by his expression what he was thinking. God, I’m sorry. Have I hurt you, angel?

  “Oh, God.” My voice was cracking as Tage quickly removed the clamps and reached for his cell phone. Tears slid freely from my eyes as I looked down to see a thin trickle of blood between my thighs, then back up to Tage’s distraught expression.

  “Christ, angel. Fuck! What have I done?”

  Weeks ago, maybe two, or possibly three, I knew deep down that something wasn’t right. My emotions had been a whirlwind, my appetite next to none, and nearly everything I attempted to drink left me with an unpleasant burning sensation in my chest and a deep pain in my stomach that felt like a knife stabbing me.

  “Hang tight, baby. Everything’s going to be fine.” Panic sounded in his tone as he pulled a light blanket over my bare body. I tried keeping my eyes open and staying alert, but I was dizzy and felt faint. His voice was drifting in and out, and I could only decipher parts of what he was saying. It seemed like he was trying to get my clothes back on and keep me covered with the blanket all at the same time.

  “An ambulance is on the way. Just keep your eyes closed. I’ve got you … I’ve got you, angel.”

  Ambulance? For a moment, I couldn’t comprehend, the word rattling around in my head. The last thing I could remember clearly was me naked … my breasts screaming from the heavy clamps … my inner thighs on fire from the bite of a flogger … the debilitating cramping in my stomach.

  “Tage?” Reality came flowing back as I looked up, blinking frantically to keep from falling apart at the fear behind his eyes. A sick feeling of dread filled me, so strong that I couldn’t comprehend. I could only remember feeling terror on such an intense level one time before.

  I hadn’t been excessively emotional these last weeks. I didn’t have a stomach bug or heartburn. I wasn’t stressed from work, or fatigued.

  I was pregnant.

  And having a miscarriage.

  Tage was holding me in his arms, stroking my hair, with a soft gentleness flashing in his gaze. He wasn’t pissed off. Wasn’t staring at me with wrongdoing in his expression. He was fighting emotion.

  There was a faint sound of a siren. “I’m so sorry, Tage.” My voice came out in a choking whisper while my hand instinctively reached for my stomach as I tried ignoring another dull pain. “I didn’t plan on this. I would never do…” My words were cut short by a heavy biting cramp. “Tage! Oh God! I need the bathroom.” My voice cracked as I sat straight up and leaned over the side of his bed, heaving and getting sick all over the edge of the comforter and the wood floor beneath.

  “I’m sorry. Please don’t hate me.”

  “Angel, I love you. I love you so damned much. I have since I was seventeen. And I swear on my life, I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to prove it.”

  ****

  Tage

  Fear can keep a person alive, the brain having specialized centers, genes, and neurons dedicated to encouraging one’s chance at surviving a threat. That same person can also be literally scared to death if they’re unable to calm themselves. Rapid pumping of an individual’s heartbeat can ultimately begin to instead, tremble, killing a man or woman with the healthiest of hearts.

  My heart raced behind my chest, the fear inside me paralyzing. Each passing second felt like an eternity.

  My angel, my doll—she looked so damn small. So fragile and helpless. “I’m so fucking sorry,” I heard myself saying once, twice, or shit, I didn’t know many times, as I tried reaching out for her.

  “Sir, someone will let you know the minute she’s out of surgery.”

  My emotions were so out of fucking sync. I’d lost control, letting my anger and crabby mood get the best of me. I could literally feel Pops’s laugh, see him giving me that mocking smile. “You’re a letdown, Tage. Get out of my sight.” My head felt like a bomb was about to explode inside. My brain was saying one thing, while my heart said something entirely opposite. Maybe Ava and Melli were better off away from me. Maybe I couldn’t be what I wanted, or what they needed.

  Fuck my life. Fuck this godforsaken twisted need inside me to hurt women.

  Nurses and staff were drifting in and out of the room, but still, no one had answers. Someone will be out to see you as soon as they can was all I could get out of anyone.

  I hated this fucking place.

  And hated myself even worse.

  My entire chest felt paralyzed. It was so tense and tight that I could barely catch my breath with this frantic need inside me to shield her from hurt and protect her from whatever was happening inside her fragile body. My God, was I migrating toward a lifestyle I had only watched others live? Did I want a wife? A family?

  Christ, I did. I was in love with Ava Montgomery.

  If it took the rest of my days, I would make this up to her. Or fucking die trying.

  I gulped back the choking emotion in my throat, set my ego aside, and called Megan to find me Michael Kavanagh’s number. He needed to pick up Melli.

  They both needed to be here.

  Misery spilled from the corners of my eyes, while agony claw
ed through the cavity of my chest like tiny, crushing splinters piercing my gut over and over as I waited for the unknown. There was a panic inside me that felt like an electrical storm. I felt helpless, powerless, like I was in the middle of my worst nightmare.

  I’d been scared before, as a child, and as an adult. But right now, what I felt was a paralyzing, crippling kind of fear. I was honestly … scared to death.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Tage

  Wide awake, anxious and unsettled, seconds, then minutes ticked by. Slowly. At a snail’s pace. The past … the future … the next hour, weighed heavily on my mind. Nerves about the future racked me with uncertainty and apprehension. I glanced at the clock. Seventeen minutes after eight in the evening, only six minutes later than when I’d last looked.

  Ava and Melli both had heavy eyes, the National Geographic channel on television as we all three relaxed on the bed. When a commercial came on for Wild Alaska, Ava’s eyes widened. “One day I want to take an Alaskan cruise. I think it would be so cool to see all the whales.” She gripped my hand, a tenderness in her gaze as she leaned over and kissed a quieter than normal Melli. “Did you know Alaska has more than a hundred-thousand glaciers and twelve-thousand rivers, sweetie?”

  “Umm hmm,” Melli said in a small voice that was a crystal-clear indication that she was tired and ready for bed. She had barely left her mother’s side since the surgery. Michael Kavanagh had also been a regular, doing his best to make things right again with not only his daughter and granddaughter, but with me as well. I guess something I’d said in the short discussion in the hospital waiting room had struck a nerve.

  “Why did you do it, Kavanagh?”

  “Why? You’re father to a young daughter. Do you really have to ask?”

  “Was it worth losing a daughter’s trust? A granddaughter’s respect?”

  Things weren’t perfect, but everyone seemed to be trying. Two weeks had passed, and I had been staying at Ava’s house, simply because I refused to leave, and also because I thought that under the circumstances, her and Melli’s own beds and surroundings were best. For now.

  “Come on, Mitt hjarta. Let’s get you tucked into your bed for the night.”

  “Okay, Daddy.”

  My heart skipped a beat, that word hanging in my mind for a few seconds. It was the first time she’d called me that, and it felt like beautiful music to my ears.

  This feeling inside me … it was beyond words. To say it was incredible was a ridiculous understatement. What I felt was a rush, a complete awe-inspiring feeling that I never once thought someone like me would experience. Out of everything I’d ever done in my life, this little blue-eyed girl who was depending on me to get her tucked in her bed just right was damn sure proof that I’d gotten one thing right.

  I’d missed out on crucial years with Melli and came way too fucking close to losing Ava not once, but twice. Melli could have ended up without a mother and lost the person she looked up to the most. I’d made a dire mistake, failed the woman I loved, and my daughter. But I wouldn’t ever make that mistake again.

  Losing either of them would absolutely kill me.

  “Come on.” Ava kissed the tip of Melli’s nose. “Let’s both tuck her in.”

  “Careful,” I told a stretching Ava. “You need to rest, angel.”

  “Jeez, Tage. Rest is all I’ve been doing. I’m gonna end up with bed sores on my ass if I don’t get out of the bed at some point.”

  “Bad word, Mommy,” Melli mumbled groggily. “Adam says we southern ladies don’t say stuff like that.”

  “I know what he says, baby. And yes, Mommy used a bad word. I’ll be better. Promise.”

  My stomach knotted again at thoughts of Ava in pain, blood trickling between her thighs.

  All because she’d wanted to please me.

  “Take it easy, angel.” I helped ease a still weak Ava from the bed, then scooped my squirming daughter up in my arms. “Your chariot awaits, Mitt hjarta.”

  Melli wrapped her tiny arms around my neck and pressed her cheek against my chest. “You’re so funny, Daddy.”

  Hearing her call me that was priceless. Nothing could be better than this. For the first time, I knew I was exactly where I needed to be.

  Where I was meant to be. Where I wanted to be.

  Home … was this what it felt like to have a home?

  I think I’m ready to find out.

  ****

  Ava

  Watching our daughter’s tiny fingers around her daddy’s neck as he carried her in his arms was priceless. It made everything seem better. Made me feel a hundred times stronger and more confident about what the future may or may not hold. Seeing Tage love on our daughter made it all seem as if nothing but clear blue skies and double rainbows lay ahead, when deep inside, I knew our real challenges were only just beginning.

  There was only one thing that could give us the true, complete peace and heartfelt relief we both needed before we could breathe again. That much anticipated phone call … fear of the unknown …they both had our nerves on pins and needles. But deep down, in a strange kind of way, one that perhaps only a mother could sense, it felt like everything was just as it was meant to be. Whatever the outcome, we would deal with it. Together. As the family we were. I believed Tage and I were soulmates, and in my eyes that meant we could handle any hurdle.

  Just as long as we did it together.

  I stood silently with a palm on my belly, the incision, though small, from the emergency appendectomy still a little inflamed. Tage had such a tenderness in his eyes as he pulled Melli’s covers up just right, tucking in the sides with absolute perfection, then leaning over and pressing a long, soft kiss against her forehead and telling her she was his beautiful little princess—his Mitt hjarta. He began whispering something deep in her ear. Words he didn’t want me to hear. Secrets between a father and daughter. That’s when the prettiest smile spread over Melli’s face, so astonishingly beautiful that another surge of emotion spread through my heart.

  Whatever they had just shared left my little girl happy as a damn lark.

  “Awesomesauce, Daddy,” she said, her pretty eyes closing as she slid into what I prayed was a sweet, dream-filled slumber.

  Tage and Melli hadn’t left my side and barely allowed me to lift a finger without one of them pampering and catering to my every need. Tage refused to even go to the office, assuring me they could hold down the fort for a few more days without him. I still didn’t know exactly what he’d said to my father at the hospital, but whatever it had been, my dad seemed to be truly remorseful for his past actions.

  Lance had even stopped by yesterday and actually sat down with Tage, talking about football and his new coaching position at UTA Arlington. He seemed happy. Upbeat. He was buying a new house closer to his job and driving a new truck. Pretty confident he had someone new in his life, I wasn’t sure how Melli having two fathers was going to pan out, but right now it seemed to be working out just beautifully.

  My Melli’s heart was strong enough to handle both Lance and Tage.

  I just hoped I had a little bit of my daughter’s strength to handle whatever God had planned for our little family.

  Fifteen minutes later, bedtime for Melli had come and gone. Tage and I sat on the bed, silent, watching Game of Thrones repeats on the television, my fingers tangled through his. A frenzy of need suddenly rushed through me, and I turned toward him, straddling him, dragging his lips onto mine and gallantly stroking the firm groove of his erection through his sweatpants.

  “I need you, Tage. Why aren’t you inside me?” The bit of discomfort in my belly was nothing compared to the sudden emptiness in my core.

  “I need you, too, angel. I need my hands on you. Inside you. I need your skin on mine. Jesus, I need to taste you, baby,” he uttered against the sensitive spot on my neck, his voice tight with passion.

  Heat stormed through my thighs, every nerve ending in my body blazing as his cock hardened against me. “Baby, p
lease,” I whimpered, knowing my chances were slim to none, even with my pleading.

  He took my cheeks between his palms, possessively, staring into my eyes. Then his lips were on mine, kissing me with long strokes of his tongue, with a frantic hunger and ravishing need. Blistering heat slid down my body and straight into my clit. He pulled his mouth from mine, leaving me breathless and aroused.

  “Two more weeks, doll. The doctor said no sex for at least a month. I won’t take the risk, Ava. I won’t.” His eyes darkened with lust as he laid me back and slid down my body. “You can’t have my cock, but you can damn sure have my mouth.”

  ****

  Tage

  Her heart was thundering against me, her eyes big, blue, still glazed with heated lust, even after two hard orgasms. She was my life. My everything. And as hard as I was, this wasn’t about fucking.

  I’d die a long horrible death before I risked her health again.

  With my cock thick and erect, I dropped to my knees at the side of the bed, and reached underneath for the blue box I’d put there two days ago.

  Once I found my voice, I opened the Tiffany box, a shiny, cushion-cut, yellow diamond ring with a double row of vibrant white diamonds inside.

  “Yellow diamonds are known for capturing the warmth and splendor of the sunlight. You, Ava Montgomery, are my heart. What warms me not only in the darkest of nights, but during each minute of each waking day. You and Melli are my light. The sun and the moon. My life. My reason to wake up every morning. You are so damned beautiful,” I murmured, staring hard into her blue gaze and hoping she could see the sincerity in my stare and feel the profoundness of my love. “Would you please give me the honor of being my wife?”

  She studied me for several long seconds, silent, like she was wrestling with emotion. Her eyes filled with tears, and her bottom lip quivered. Dread slid through me as I tried ignoring the sudden panic-filled thought that she may refuse my proposal. When, at last, she smiled and nodded her assent, the rush of relieved happiness I felt inside my chest reversed every negative thought I had ever felt.