Loved Up

by A. A. Albright

  While she thought, we walked back towards the Wyrd Court. I helped Gretel avoid a few lampposts and a bin along the way. I was used to her bumping into things, and I was used to the way her mind worked, too. A part of me sometimes thought we shared a similar mode of processing. Gretel seemed to see things without knowing she was seeing them, and then put them together in a great big Eureka moment sometime later. It was why I loved working with her.

  Most of the Peacemakers hadn’t liked partnering with her, and a lot of the Wayfairs avoided her too. They only saw the Gretel who tripped over her own shoelaces, or the Gretel who always had something just on the tip of her tongue. They never stuck around long enough to find out what it was she was trying to remember. None of them saw her amazing glamour skills, either.

  Even though she had the body of an Amazonian-style goddess, most men overlooked her, too. I was so glad that Finn had taken note of her skills, and given me a chance to see her for what she really was. Right now, I was waiting for her eyes to flash. When they did, I smiled.

  ‘It was in the bank!’ she exclaimed. ‘I was queuing, getting some money exchanged, but really keeping an eye on Mr Montrose’s office door because he was in there with Barry. Anyway, that woman you hate was in there. Horse Face. She was getting a new cheque book for the TV studio, and I was standing behind her while she opened it up to look inside, and I saw the company name. Angel Enterprises.’ Gretel gave a mad grin, as though she was shocked by her own memory.

  I slapped her on the back. We had been going to see if Finn’s meeting was over so we could fill him in on the disappearance of the salon, but now I thought we might have to go somewhere else instead.

  ‘Come on. Gabriel will be getting ready for this afternoon’s show,’ I said. ‘Let’s pop over and see if he remembers anything about the salon.’

  ≈

  The studio was crazy when we arrived, with staff members rushing about and getting things ready for the show. I glanced at my watch. They had hours left before they went live. We found Gabriel in his dressing room, his mouth wide open, while a pretty witch with black curly hair and vivid green eyes pointed a wand at his teeth.

  ‘Hawo Wan,’ he mumbled. A short stream of even more unintelligible words ensued.

  The witch smiled at me. ‘I’m Glenda,’ she said. ‘I’m just finishing off his teeth. I’ll only be a second more.’

  She was true to her word, making his teeth blindingly white within seconds, before smiling at us again and leaving the room.

  Gretel was staring after her as she went, her eyes filled with excitement. ‘Glenda. The Glenda. As in Glenda of Glenda’s Glamours?’

  Gabriel nodded. ‘She does my teeth just the way Wanda hates them each and every day.’

  ‘Oh.’ I felt my brow begin to furrow. ‘Didn’t you switch over to some whitening potion?’

  ‘We did.’ He gave me a wry smile. ‘We trialled it a few times, but it’s no good. Glenda is expensive for a reason. Because she’s the best.’

  I sat down on a couch across the room, while Gretel poked about on his table. It was full of snacks, so normally I’d be right there with her. But just now, I felt far too guilty for food.

  ‘So what can I do for the two most beautiful Wayfarers in the world?’ He gave us a full-on beaming smile.

  Gretel shielded her eyes a moment, then let out a shy giggle. ‘Wayfarers,’ she said, turning the word over. ‘I still can’t get used to hearing that. Ever since Finn told me I was named after a Wayfarer, I’ve loved my job even more than before. But now ...’ She let out a little squeal. ‘Now we’re not just named after Wayfarers. Wanda – we are Wayfarers.’

  I squealed along with her for a minute. I mean, why not? I was just as excited as she was with all of the changes.

  ‘Hey, it’s a bit mad here,’ I said to Gabriel, once our squealing was done. ‘Is it always like this before a show?’

  He shook his head. ‘No. Just the big ones. The election isn’t long away, so we’re making each show bigger and better, trying to get as much oomph behind Agatha’s campaign as possible.’

  I let out an unbidden little sigh of sadness. All these months he’d done so much for our coven, using his show to gain the popularity of the masses. Sure, he had a creepy father who I suspected had links to the Dark Team. And yeah, he had his ups and downs with Max, going from best buddies to sworn enemies to grudging acquaintances to ... whatever they were now. But he’d been good to me, and to our coven.

  ‘Are you okay? You still haven’t said why you’re here. Not that I’m not delighted to see you ...’

  ‘Oh, right. Gabe, is this station owned by Angel Enterprises?’

  As I asked the question, the door opened and Horse Face walked in. She sneered at me for a second before smiling at Gabriel. ‘I have that suit you were after.’ She held up a velvet suit with enormous lapels, and a ruffled shirt to wear beneath.

  ‘Thanks Lindsey.’ Gabriel took the outfit from her. ‘The older witches will love me in this. Hey, Wanda and Gretel were just asking about Angel Enterprises. You’d know more about that than me.’

  She began to undo his robe – the hussy! – and helped him wriggle into the flouncy shirt. Did she help him change his underwear, too?

  ‘Angel Enterprises owns this show,’ she said. ‘We own the whole channel, in fact.’

  ‘We?’ Gretel asked between mouthfuls of doughnut.

  ‘A slip of the tongue,’ Lindsey amended. ‘I’m a mere minion, truth be told. The owners don’t have much involvement in the day to day running. They prefer to let us do the work while they make the money. Isn’t that right, Gabe?’

  He nodded, pushing her hands away from the belt of his jeans. ‘I can take the rest from here, thanks. Anyway, why are you asking about our masters from above?’

  ‘Masters from above. Funny.’ Gretel laughed nervously, looking from Gabriel to Lindsey. ‘So, have you ever used a salon called Transformations?’

  There was a beat of silence. Somewhere in the middle of it, my ears began to ring. It was approaching painful when Gabriel finally spoke.

  ‘I have no idea who they are,’ he said. ‘We tried out a place that did whitening potions, but it was a UK based company. Glenda’s is the only salon we use.’

  ‘Oh.’ Gretel glanced at me. I didn’t need to be a mind-reader to know what she was thinking. How could Gabriel forget a salon he’d visited so recently? But seeing as he visited Transformations as part of a Wayfair investigation, we were hardly going to point that out in front of Horse Face. ‘Well, you’re on their client list,’ Gretel went on. ‘Or Angel Enterprises is, anyway.’

  My ears began to ring again, and my head began to thud, as Lindsey smacked her forehead.

  ‘Silly Gabe,’ she said, giving him the sort of smile that made me want to rip her hair out in clumps. So what if I was about to break up with him? She didn’t know that. ‘The studio has used them before. When we got all of the vampire girls those manicures as a thank you for all the late shifts they were pulling.’

  ‘Oh yeah.’ Gabriel nodded. ‘It was back when we were doing a late night special at the last election. The studio has a lot of vampires on the staff for night shifts. Those girls love that salon. Why are you asking?’

  My hand went to my ears, poking them in an effort to stop the ringing. Maybe it was the lack of sleep. Or the guilt. Or both. I looked pointedly at Lindsey. ‘It’s a Wayfair matter. Or a Wayfarer one, should I say.’ Gretel and I shared another small squeal. ‘I’ll get used to saying it eventually,’ I went on. ‘Anyway, we can’t discuss it in front of anyone who’s not one of us.’ I kissed Gabriel briefly on the cheek. ‘Good luck with the show,’ I said. ‘I’ll see you later.’

  He reached out and grasped my hand. ‘Aw, I was hoping you’d stick around to watch. I thought maybe we could have an early Valentine’s meal afterwards, spend the night together. Because I know I won’t get to see you on Valentine’s Day, seeing as you’ll be policing the election and I’ll be broadcastin
g.’

  I gave Lindsey another pointed look, and she dumped the rest of Gabriel’s suit in a chair and left the room. ‘I want to see you tonight,’ I said once she was gone. ‘But you know it has to be at Wayfarers’ Rest. We’re all spending the next few nights there.’

  He winced. ‘Oh, yeah, about that ... if the whole coven is being targeted, then I should probably be spending more time with my dad. Make sure he’s okay. After all, if the Dark Team are going after people close to you, then he could be on that list. He’s practically your father-in-law.’

  I tried to turn my grimace into a smile.

  ‘Oh, yeah – there’s something else,’ Gabriel added. ‘I didn’t want to say it in front of Lindsey, but I’ve actually been to Transformations before. Your mam asked me to check out that potion seller’s girlfriend – the guy who had the shop on Capel Street. I don’t know if it’ll help you with whatever you’re looking into now, but you should have a look at the file I wrote up, in case there’s anything useful there.’

  ‘Oh.’ I could feel the relief lighting up my face. ‘Yeah, yeah I’ll look it up.’

  ‘Great.’ He kissed me. ‘And I’ll come over to Wayfarers’ Rest as soon as I know my dad’s all right.’

  Once again, I was fighting to keep smiling. I was relieved that he hadn’t been holding anything back about Transformations, but I still had the pesky little matter of breaking up with him to get through.

  ‘Okay,’ I said nervously. ‘See you then.’

  21. Love in a Larder

  Max and I stood in the larder at Wayfarers’ Rest, huddled together. Officially we were in there to fetch some tinned tomatoes. But we might have been taking just a tad longer than necessary to put our hands on them.

  One of those hands – his – grazed over my hips. ‘I’ve missed you so much,’ he whispered. ‘It’s like my chest gets tight when I haven’t seen you for a while. I can’t stand it.’

  ‘I know,’ I told him. ‘I’ve been feeling the same all day. Sore chest. Even ringing in my ears. I can’t wait until we can be together all the time. And not in a larder.’

  He let out a husky laugh. ‘No, we’ll definitely want to be somewhere more comfortable than a larder. Listen, Emily came over earlier. I finally told her. She didn’t take it well.’

  I banged my head against his chest. ‘Poor Emily. I feel terrible. I like her so much, y’know. I wanted you and her to be a couple. And not just for the free apple tart.’

  He looked down at me, one brow quirking upwards.

  ‘Okay, a lot of it was about the apple tart,’ I admitted. ‘But that doesn’t change how terrible I feel. Did you tell her it was because of me?’

  ‘No. I didn’t want to do that until you’ve spoken to Gabriel.’ He let his nose rub against mine. ‘I guess it’ll have to be our secret for now.’

  I was just about to respond – possibly with a kiss – when the door pulled open. Melissa gazed at us, her face forlorn. ‘What are you doing?’ she cried.

  I pulled her in – first making sure the kitchen behind her was empty. Thankfully the others were still in the living room watching Gabriel’s show. ‘Keep it down,’ I whispered. ‘Melissa, I’m really sorry. I wanted to tell you but ...’

  Her nostrils flared as she looked at Max. ‘I know you love her. You hinted at it when I tried to give my heart to you. But she already has someone, Max. Can’t you just forget her? You and I could be so happy if you just gave us a chance.’ She moved towards him, pushing me out of the way and pressing her body against his. With her long legs, she was nearly as tall as he was. I ripped her away from him and pushed her towards the door.

  ‘Listen here, missy!’ I screeched. ‘Me and Max are together. I’m calling it off with Gabriel tonight.’

  I had hoped that the tone of my voice would be enough to send her on her way, but I forgot: this was Melissa. She stood up to her full height, glowered at me for about five seconds, and then smacked me clean across the face.

  ‘Hey!’ Max stood between the two of us, protecting me with his body.

  I peeped out from behind his shoulder. ‘This isn’t like you, Melissa,’ I said. ‘Are you sure you gave Ronnie your blood sample and not someone else’s?’

  She fixed me with a shrivelling stare. ‘How dare you insinuate that this is down to some love potion or spell? If you really loved Max then you wouldn’t be questioning my love. I mean, I can see quite clearly why every woman in the world should be falling head over heels with him. I’m not questioning your feelings. Why are you questioning mine?’

  Max sighed. ‘She’s questioning yours because it came on awfully sudden, Melissa. Just like Agatha’s obsession with that museum curator. Just like your mam, and Wanda’s mam and even Ronnie herself are getting a bit crazy. I still think this is a love potion. It must be a new one, one no one’s heard about before. That’ll be why you’re all testing negative.’

  Although Melissa was looking lovingly at him while he spoke, she was twitching a little too. ‘Max, you have no idea how happy I am that you’re so concerned about me. It proves that you care. It makes me think there might be a chance for us, once you get Wanda out of your system.’ Her eyes turned on me. ‘Because let’s face it, if anyone is under the influence of some charm or potion, it’s clearly Wanda.’

  I tried not to make my eyes convey the pity I felt. I knew how proud she was, so the last thing she would want was my pity. But she really was deluded. We needed to get to the bottom of this, and we needed to do it fast, before poor Melissa did something stupid.

  ‘Listen ...’ I spoke soothingly. ‘I know you don’t like the idea of me and Max being together, but you’ll have to get used to it. Because me and him are the real deal. The only thing I ask of you is this – please don’t tell anyone about us. Not yet. Not until I’ve spoken to Gabriel. It has to come from me, and I have to do it sensitively.’

  Her hands went to her hips and she tossed her dark red hair. She looked magnificent when she made moves like that. I had the feeling that if I tried something similar, people would ask me if I had an itchy scalp.

  ‘I don’t care about sparing Gabriel’s feelings,’ she said. ‘I only care about Max. But I will keep it quiet. Only because I know that Max will come to his senses one of these days and choose me. And when he does, I don’t want anyone else to know that this meaningless fling happened first.’

  She tossed her mane once more, and flounced out the door.

  Max let out a low whistle. ‘Boy oh boy. She has a real problem.’ He pulled me towards him. ‘I’m so glad that you and I have one another. We’ll never have to go through the pain of unrequited love.’

  ≈

  When Wyrd News in the Afternoon was finally over, the others emerged from the living room. Max and I had managed to drag ourselves out of the larder to make the pasta sauce by then. Ronnie came towards me, her face etched with worry.

  ‘I need to talk to you,’ she said as she pulled me aside. ‘I’ve just gotten some really bad news.’

  My hand went to my heart. ‘It’s about the test results, isn’t it? Your assistant found something. Oh, my stars – all of you have been given a love potion. I just knew it.’

  ‘What?’ She shook her head in quick, jerky motions. ‘Oh, that. No. I don’t know why you keep insisting there’s a potion at work here, Wanda. I mean, sure, Agatha’s being weird, but I’m not. Anyway, look.’ She pushed her phone in my face. ‘Read that message and tell me what I should do.’

  I took the phone gingerly from her hands and read the screen. It was a text message from Arthur Albright:

  I never thought I’d be the sort of man to do a thing like this via text message, but my lawyer says it’s better if I have something in writing. And I have tried to tell you face to face. Many times. Ronnie, you’re a beautiful, amazing woman, but these past few days there’s been something really wrong with you. Yesterday you tried to mount me on my desk while I was teaching a class of ten year olds. When I asked you to leave, you started
singing love songs to me. I have feelings for you, Ronnie, but these children are in my care, and I can’t have you behaving that way around them. Please don’t contact me again in any manner until you’ve gotten some help.

  ‘So?’ Ronnie looked at me, an urgent glint in her eyes. ‘What do you think? He’s joking, right? He has an amazing sense of humour after all. I mean, he couldn’t actually be asking me to leave him alone. He knows how much my heart hurts when I’m not near him.’

  I felt my lids begin to blink rapidly. Poor Ronnie. She was in an even worse state than Melissa. This had to stop. I was going to get them all into Night and Gale until we found out what was wrong, even if I had to use some painful spells to send them there. My finger stirred in my pocket as I sent a burst of magic there. Just something small at first. Something to subdue her. If she refused to stay in the hospital, then I could get the big guns out.

  Just as I began to lift my finger, my mother ran into the room. ‘I’ve just had a phone call from Agatha’s secretary,’ she said in a strained voice, tears streaming from her eyes. ‘I can’t believe I’m saying this but ... Agatha is dead!’

  22. Loved Up or Drugged Up?

  We stood in the corridor outside the Wyrd Court morgue, quiet and crying, gathered around Dennis, the healer. I could hear the words he was saying, but I could barely believe them.

  ‘Her heart just ... gave out,’ he said. ‘I’ll know more when I’ve had more time to examine the body, but at the moment I don’t understand it. From what I can tell, she was a perfectly healthy woman until recently. Yeah, there’s a lot of damage, but all of it is new.’ He shook his head and ran his hands through his few strands of hair. ‘If she had a weak heart in general, then I’d say that something shocking or upsetting could have put her over the edge. But between what I can see myself, and what I’ve seen in her records, that’s just not the case.’ He looked at Ronnie. ‘We’ll know more when you run your tests, but I’m veering towards poisoning here. There’s no evidence as yet but ...’ He paused and narrowed his eyes. ‘Ronnie? Did you hear what I said?’