Conflicted: Keegan's Chronicles

by Julia Crane

  “Maybe when you are covered in fur, it’s warm. Hey, wait a minute! I didn’t think you could speak?”

  “In here we can pretty much do anything we want.”

  Keegan cocked her head at him, her hair plastered to her head in a way that was more endearing than unflattering. “I have to admit this is the most amazing place I have ever seen.”

  “Yeah, Calvron is something else. He can do just about anything. I can’t imagine what it would be like to have that kind of power.”

  “Do you think he could bring my bond back to my chosen?”

  Donald’s whole body tensed. “No idea, why don’t you ask him?” After a slight pause, he added, “Are you even sure you would want him to?”

  Keegan stared at him like he was crazy. “Why wouldn’t I want him to?”

  “Well, don’t you think it’s a little strange that you’re not comfortable around the person who is supposed to be your perfect match? Wouldn’t you rather know that it was real and not just some magic bond that made you want to be with him?”

  Her eyes on the large tiger before her, she realized she had never thought of it that way. What if he was right? She would rather have true love than a magic spell that made them believe they were perfect together. Shouldn’t she feel something for Rourk even if the bond was broken? Ugh, it was all so confusing. She lay back in the water and floated with her head on the tiger. She was always so comfortable around Donald; too bad he wasn’t interested in her more than a friend. “You know,” she said, “you really are smart for a tiger.”

  He wasn’t sure if it was the place that gave him the courage, or the fact that he was in his tiger form. Before he could stop the words, they spilled out. “I think you should give me a chance. What if we are perfect together without a bond?”

  “Donald, don’t joke around,” Keegan said with a sigh. “You already made it clear that you’re not interested in me.”

  “That was before your bond was broken. Keegan, I have always been crazy about you. I just didn’t want to get hurt. I knew you were an elf and that you were bound to another.”

  She stared across the expanse of water into the bright blue eyes of the tiger. This is absurd, she thought. I’m talking to a tiger who wants to date me. Well, then why is your heart beating a mile a minute, she wondered. This did feel perfect. “Are you serious?”

  “I have never been more serious about anything in my life. I know I joke around a lot,” he went on. Keegan thought it was so weird to hear Donald’s voice come from the tiger. “This is not a laughing matter. Keegan, every time I see you I feel like I am on an elevator that has dropped. I think about you all the time. Maybe fate has stepped in and broken the bond so we can be together.”

  Keegan backed up enough to find the ground and stood in the water. “I’m sorry, I need to think.”

  She disappeared before his eyes. Her main power was invisibility; it was the first time he had seen her use it. Donald hoped he hadn’t pushed her away. He couldn’t imagine not having her in his life, even if she only wanted to be friends. He rolled over and stared up at the sky. He had done all he could; it was up to her now.

  Keegan was so confused and, oddly, a little angry. She tried to think positive thoughts to warm herself up while she trudged out of the water. Her dress and skin dried in an instant; she guessed it was Calvron’s magic that did it. She sat down on a large, flat rock in the warm sunshine and recalled the photos of her weekend with Rourk. They looked so happy together. Was she ready to give up on her chosen to give Donald a chance? Could she ever be that happy again without the bond?

  Keegan always knew there was something special about Donald. He was the only boy that held her interest for more than a couple of weeks. However, she needed to think it over. Donald was a shape shifter and she was an elf. What if she fell in love with him and they got married? What would that mean for their children? She thought of her cousin Keara. She was the only half elf that Keegan knew. Keara always felt so out of place among the rest of the elves. Did she really want to do that to her own children? Ugh, she was ashamed of herself. She was a hypocrite. How many times had she sat down and told Keara how special she was for being different? And she truly meant it: Keara was amazing. It was obvious that she was just looking for an excuse, an easy way out of her predicament.

  What if she did lose her bond so she could have a chance with Donald? Could she really turn her back on that?

  The real question was could she turn her back on Rourk? He was her chosen after all.

  Chapter 6

  A voice shook her out of her thoughts. "Keegan, you’re it. You could have picked a better hiding spot." Sam gave her a strange look, his blonde mane windblown from his romp through the woods. He was a magnificent lion, but she was still fond of certain tiger.

  She hadn’t even noticed that she’d become visible again. "Hide and seek? Well, you guys are about to lose." Keegan smirking and he roared and ran away.

  She leapt to her feet and took off running, trying to decide whether she would play the game without magic at first. She looked everywhere for several minutes, but could find no one. She passed through a small clearing near a clear, trickling brook and saw movement from the corner of her eyes. Wait, were those stars she had seen? In a swift movement, she changed directions and headed toward a group of large, freestanding boulders. Yes, she saw them again. She closed her eyes and with her mind, she saw Lauren, her best friend, the fairy. Once again Keegan was struck by her beauty. "Lauren, you’re it."

  Lauren came out from behind the huge boulder, put her hands palm up and shrugged. "I let you find me. I know you’re still unsure about how to play in the big leagues."

  What the hell did that mean? Keegan wondered. Whatever, she would just disappear if anyone was close enough to catch her. She sprinted towards the forest and searched for a great hiding spot. The trees were huge, their trunks the biggest she had ever seen. The colors were so vibrant it was mesmerizing.

  Something compelled Keegan to head further into the woods. She kept going deeper into the shadows, the brush under her feet cracked, and she didn't want to stop. There was no way they would find her way back here.

  She was sidetracked by the sound of whispers coming from the large hot pink flowers lining the path upon which she walked. Were they talking? Keegan leaned down to put her ear next to the largest and she heard Calvron's voice say, "You're it again." His laugh could be heard throughout the forest.

  "Calvron, is that you? You are a flower?" Keegan was aghast. She poked one of the silky petals. The flower swayed back and forth a couple times, and vapor appeared, hiding the flower and growing larger when Keegan stepped away from it.

  In just a few seconds, Calvron stood before her. He was a tall, lanky guy with shaggy dark blonde hair and pale blue eyes. Keegan had always thought he was kinda cute, but he was also too arrogant. "You really suck at this game Keegan."

  "What? How can you say that? You cheated!"

  "I cheated? How is that?" He crossed his long arms over his chest. He looked rather outlandish, but somehow suave, in a pair of black cotton pants tucked into high leather boots, topped with his white cocktail jacket. The collar of a satiny shirt was open under his coat and there were white gloves on his hands.

  "You were a flower."

  "Keegan, this is the land of magic, of course magic will be used. Are you going to tell me you didn't think your little disappearing act would give you a leg up?"

  She felt the anger rise in her and coldness seeped through her body.

  "Keegan, you need to stop being a baby. I got you fair and square. You are no longer playing with a bunch of elves and humans. We all have powers here and we use them."

  She heard laughter and glanced around to find there were at least twenty creatures of the light of different varieties staring and laughing at her. They popped out from behind trees and morphed from inanimate objects of the forest, just as Calvron had done from the flower. How dare they! They had some nerve making fu
n of her. Her fingernails dug into her palms. All of the sudden, one by one they disappeared and reappeared, blinking in and out of existence before her while they muffled laughter filled the air. Even Lauren and Anna laughed.

  "Elf, you're not so special in here," echoed through the land.

  Keegan grew colder by the second, her lips quivered and her body shook. A cracking sound startled her, like a gunshot through the woods, and when she looked down, the ground had turned to ice. The laugher had stopped.

  Everyone had been turned to ice! Oh my god, had she done this?

  A loud crack and pop sounded, and the ice shattered around Calvron. He shook himself, brushing ice shards from the sleeves of his white jacket. "Keegan, have you always had the ability to turn things to ice?" he asked in a serious voice.

  She covered her mouth with her hand, her eyes wide. "No, this is the first time it has happened. I don't even know what I did."

  "Well, it has to be a pretty strong power to work in the land I made,” Calvron said, his jaw set in a hard line. “Negative or destructive magic is forbidden in here. What were you thinking when it happened?"

  "I was angry that everyone was laughing at me."

  "So it is probably brought on by your temper. I don't recall you having a bad temper in the past."

  "I didn't, but since I was brought back to life, I seem to get angry easily and when I do, I can feel myself getting colder. I can usually warm myself up by thinking positive thoughts. I guess this is the first time I’ve gotten so mad."

  Calvron looked at her with interest. He had never come across something like this before; he loved puzzles. Keegan returned his look with pleading eyes. "Can you please help me?"

  He paced around for several minutes like he was deep in thought, intrigued by the new power she just revealed. He came to a pause and shook his head at her, his hands clasped behind his back. "Keegan, I'm not sure I can. Whatever dark magic is in you is stronger than me. Not to brag or anything, but I'm pretty damn powerful. I will look into it and see if there is anything I can do. The easiest thing is to try to avoid situations that make you angry."

  She wanted to cry. How could she have done this? "Can't you at least unfreeze them?"

  "Nope, that is on you. I was strong enough to break myself free. You need to figure out how to set them free."

  "Calvron, this is your made up world. You fix it!" Keegan yelled. She watched in horror as the ice covered him again. "No, I'm sorry! I didn't mean it. Please stop. I'm not mad at you. You are one of my best friends. I know you would help me if you could." The ice melted and Calvron was once again free, though wet.

  Just then, Donald strolled up in tiger form, his tail flicked behind him. "What happened to them?" His big head jerked in the direction of the icy creatures.

  "Why is he not frozen?" Keegan’s voice sounded panicked.

  "Hmm, if I had to guess it's because you were not angry at him at the time." Calvron turned and explained to Donald what had happened.

  Donald stared at her with intensity in his eyes. "Keegan, this is not who you are. Do not let your anger turn you into something you are not. You need to learn to control this. Before, you told me when you started to get cold you would think good thoughts to warm up. So think of something that warms your heart."

  She was still so angry that they mocked and laughed at her, but she took a deep breath and tried to think of something that would make her happy. Why am I drawing a blank? It shouldn’t be so hard.

  Donald sprawled out next to her, using his back paw to scratch his ear. "I can still picture the first time I saw you and it always makes me smile."

  Looking skeptical, Keegan responded, "You do?"

  He laughed and replied, "It was the first day of high school and I believe it was in Latin class. The teacher was giving a long speech. She was going on and on about how we were freshman and had no idea what we were going to do with our lives. That we were scared and not sure of ourselves. Inside we all mentally agreed. You raised your hand." The tiger laughed and shook his head. "The teacher called on you, and clear as can be you said, ‘I'm going to be awesome.’ I looked over at this auburn haired beauty and couldn't help but laugh. I knew in that moment that I had to meet you. I needed to know who this girl with such unabashed confidence was."

  Her face flushed and a smile crossed her face. The loud sound of ice breaking startled her. Looking around in relief, she saw all the creatures breaking free from the icy prison she had put on them. She felt light and happy. How was he able to have that effect on her so fast? She was able to laugh at herself for getting angry over something as silly as a game of hide and seek.

  “I do believe that’s enough for today, everyone,” Calvron called out. Right before her eyes the magical land was gone and they all stood at the bottom of the hill below where their cars were parked. Donald and the other creatures were back in their human forms.

  The door was gone.

  Calvron walked to his truck and yelled, "See you guys next week."

  Keegan turned to Donald, "Thank you." She paused, started to talk, and stopped again.

  "What is it Keegan? You can tell me."

  "It's just, I'm really scared, Donald. I'm glad you were there to help me fight through the darkness." She wrapped her arms tight around herself and stared into his cerulean eyes.

  "You will figure this out. There is so much good in you, the dark doesn't stand a chance. When you feel yourself getting angry, try to focus on something or someone that makes you smile."

  Keegan looked down at her shoes and then back at Donald. "Thinking of you makes me smile."

  Donald grinned and responded, "Would you like to go out with me sometime? Maybe we could go on a hike or just hang out and watch a movie? "

  "I would like that. Text me later and we'll make plans."

  Keegan walked over to Anna's car, her mind raced. She was still so confused. However, she could not deny that she felt happiest when she was around Donald. Rourk was always in the back of her mind, but she still could not remember what it felt like to want to be with him.

  Once she got to Anna’s car, Anna blasted out questions. “What happened? I feel like I lost time, but I have no idea why. All I remember is teasing you and next thing I know Calvron is telling everyone to go home.” She looked down at her sweater. ”What the heck is up with my clothes? They’re wet!”

  “So are mine,” Lauren added from the backseat.

  Keegan sighed and told them about her temper which led to them being frozen and how it seemed to be an unfortunate side effect of the dark magic.

  Her friend’s silence worried Keegan. She said, “I’m not mad at your mom, Anna.”

  She just nodded, her pink hair swished as she avoided a response.

  They drove to Lauren’s house in silence. After dropping her off, Keegan turned in her seat to look at Anna. "What do you think of Donald?"

  "Well, that’s an odd question. I think he's a great friend and he's hilarious."

  "Do you think I should date him?"

  Anna raised an eyebrow in her direction. "Where is this coming from? I know you used to have a crush on him, but I thought your focus was Rourk?"

  "I feel nothing for Rourk, but I feel happy and excited when I am around Donald."

  Anna stared at her friend, not sure what to say. Her mother’s warning rang in her ears. "Well, you did used to date a lot before so I really don't think it's a big deal if you want to hang out with him."

  "Yeah, that's what I think too. I just don't want to hurt Rourk’s feelings."

  ***

  They drove the rest of the way home in silence. Anna needed to find the light witch in a hurry. Hopefully her mother had made some progress on her search.

  Anna dropped Keegan off at home, pulled out her cell and called her mother.

  "Mom, have you found her yet?"

  "Not yet, it's not as easy as you would think."

  "Well, Keegan is already moving on from Rourk; she wants to date Donald."


  "Anna, you have to let Keegan make her own choices. Don't try to talk her out of anything."

  "Like that’s even possible. Keegan is stubborn."

  "Okay, well, I'll see you when you get home."

  "Bye."

  Anna was deep in thought. Sure, she could probably be happy with Donald, but she deserved her chosen. Anna would do anything to know who her own perfect match was. Keegan had been handed hers and then had it ripped away. She had to figure out a way to get Keegan’s bond back.

  Chapter 7

  Keegan walked through the door, energized from her time in Calvron’s world and itching to share it with someone. Her mother sat in the living room with a book open on her lap. She sipped a mug of something steamy. "Hey, Mom!”

  Emerald looked up with her hand at rest on the pages of her book, and smiled at her daughter. “Hey. Where have you been?”

  “You will never believe! Calvron made this incredible magical land. We had to walk through a wooden door that was suspended in the air. It was amazing. I wish you could have seen it.” Keegan’s words rushed out so fast.

  "Slow down Keegan. Why don't you come sit down and tell me all about it?" She patted the seat beside her and turned to face Keegan.

  Keegan smiled, skipped over and sat beside her mom. She chatted away as she described Calvron’s world. After a while, she paused, and bit her lip. She almost forgot to tell her about the freezing issue. "Mom, I learned of another side effect of the dark magic today."

  "What?" Her mother gave her a concerned look, her blue eyes dark.

  "Well, I’ve noticed that when I get angry, I start to feel cold. Today they were teasing me during a game and I got so mad that I froze them all on the spot...even the ground. Calvron and Donald were able to help me. When I think positive thoughts the coldness goes away. So after Donald told me some stories that made me happy, the ice melted, but I was really scared."

  Her mother started at Keegan without saying anything for several seconds. "Interesting,” she finally murmured. “I guess it could be worse. You will just have to learn to keep your anger in check, Keegan. Believe me, I have been dealing with learning to control my temper most of my life. It is not an easy thing to do.” The corners of her mouth turned down and her brow furrowed. She sighed and reached over to brush Keegan’s hair behind one ear. “It is, of course, possible. Your father can work with you on breathing exercises. It also helps that you know how to keep it at bay through your thoughts and emotions. Obviously trying to avoid situations that increase your anger is the easiest thing to do. Prevention is the best medicine, as they say. I just hope other side effects don’t pop up.” She put her arm around Keegan and gave her a squeeze.