Conflicted: Keegan's Chronicles

by Julia Crane

“Oh. I’m sorry. Ky-ree. That’s pretty.”

  I smiled. “Thank you.”

  Mrs. Thompson smiled. “Welcome Kairi. Come on in.”

  I walked in and smelled something mouthwatering. I couldn’t quite place it, but it was sweet and yummy. Mrs. Armstrong and the Thompsons were talking. “Here are all the papers needed to register her at school and the medical forms for treatment if she needs it. I just need you to sign these papers and I’ll be out of your hair.”

  I wandered around their living room. There were some wedding pictures of the Thompsons. They looked much younger, so it must have been taken years ago and some pictures of a boy and a girl. There was also a table with a bunch of different kids pictures on it. “Those are all the foster kids that have come to stay with us.” Mr. Thompson said. He was standing next to me now.

  I nodded. “Cool. How many do you have now?”

  “Two girls. An eleven and a fourteen year old. You’re fifteen?”

  “I’ll be sixteen in a month.”

  “Cool!” he said. “Mrs. Thompson loves an excuse to eat cake.”

  I laughed. “Me too.”

  “Kairi,” Mrs. Armstrong called. “I’ll be going now. You call if you need anything.”

  “I will.”

  She lingered for a minute giving me a look I had come to know as her please-try-to-fit-in-this-time look. I understood. I was out of options if it didn’t work out here. When she was gone, the Thompsons called down the other kids for dinner.

  When they entered the living room, they stopped short when they saw me. “Ivy, Lara, this is Kairi. She’ll be living here,” Mrs. Thompson said.

  Ivy was the smaller of the two and had jet-black hair. It hung to her shoulders and swayed when she walked. Her eyes were a bright blue. Lara was taller and bigger, not fat, but looked like she was heading there. Her hair was brown and frizzy. Her green eyes narrowed as she looked at me.

  Ivy looked at Lara, almost like she was looking for permission. Then she forced a smile and said, “Hi.”

  “Hi.” I smiled and looked from Ivy to Lara and back again, hoping that maybe this time would be different. By the look on Lara’s face, I doubted it would be.

  We walked into the kitchen where Mrs. Thompson was pulling out a ham. Try, really try to get them to like you. “That smells delicious,” I complimented.

  “Thank you. It’s ham with a maple syrup and brown sugar glaze on it.”

  Ooh. No wonder it smelled so good. “Can I help?” I asked.

  “Lara, can you show Kairi where the plates are so she can help you set the table?”

  Lara shot me a look and then said, “Sure.” She pointed to the cabinet near the sink. “They’re in there. Get five I guess.”

  I nodded and grabbed five plates out of the cabinet and put them on the table. I did the same with the glasses and silverware. We sat down and had ham, potatoes, and vegetables. “Dinner was very good,” I said later as I helped to clean up.

  “Thank you,” Mrs. Thompson replied.

  She took me upstairs when we were done cleaning up and showed me to my room. “Ivy and Lara share the other room. This will be your room. There is another bed here for another girl. I’ll take you to school tomorrow and get you registered. Lights out is ten for you. There’s a TV in the family room or books you can read. Or if you and the girls want to play a game, we have a bunch of board games too.”

  “Okay, thank you.” I started unpacking and when I turned back around, I found her still in the doorway watching me. “Was there something else?” I asked.

  “No. Sorry.” She quickly went back downstairs. Weird, I thought.

  When I was done unpacking, I went to the family room and watched some TV. Half an hour before lights out, I turned it off and went to the bathroom. There I got ready for bed by brushing my teeth and washing my face. I had to pass Ivy and Lara’s room to get to mine from the bathroom. Ivy and Lara were already in bed, so I crept by quietly. I overheard Lara talking to Ivy. “I don’t know. She’s just weird.”

  “No, she’s not,” Ivy said. “She’s pretty.”

  Lara scoffed. “Whatever. Something’s off about her.”

  I sighed and kept walking to my room. Only here for a few hours and already someone doesn’t like me. Hanging my head, I walked back to my room, and climbed in bed.

  Sleep came quickly, but so did the nightmares. I could never make sense of them, but they had to do with being chased by monsters. I woke up with my heart pounding many times. What was wrong with me that I had so many nightmares? They shook me to the core. The last time was so bad that I had tears running down my face and was trembling.

  In the morning, I stood in front of the mirror getting ready for school. I had brushed my hair and pulled it into a ponytail. I had a little bit of make-up and was trying to decide how much to put on.

  “You’re so white,” Ivy said, scaring me from the doorway.

  “You’re white too.” I laughed.

  “Yeah, but you’re really white.”

  True. I was pale. I never used powder or cover-up because there wasn’t any for someone with skin as pale as mine. I put on some blush and eyeliner. Then I rummaged through my bag for my lipstick. I found a bright red one. That would work. I was wearing jeans and a black shirt. The red would stand out.

  Lastly, I examined a brown freckle of mine near my left ear. It was bigger and darker than a normal freckle, but it wasn’t a mole and certainly didn’t have a hair sticking out from it. No amount of make-up could ever cover it up either. It was just there.

  “Time to go!” Mrs. Thompson called. I walked slowly down the stairs dreading the day in store for me.

  Before going outside, I put on my hat and sunglasses. Ivy shot me a strange look.

  I shrugged and said, “I burn easily…because I’m so white.”

  She giggled. Lara sent her an evil look and she shut up.

  In the car, I fiddled with the necklace that hung around my neck. “That’s pretty,” Mrs. Thompson said.

  I looked down at the necklace. It was a big, gold heart on a gold chain. It looked really old, antique-like. I only took it off to shower, and that was only because I was afraid that the water might ruin it. I was told that I had been found with it. A small, petite, blonde girl with a big necklace around her neck. It was the only thing I had of my parents, or what I assumed had been my parents. At the very least, it was the only thing that might someday lead me to my family.

  “Thanks,” I muttered.

  We arrived at the high school, and Lara and Ivy took off for the middle school next door. Mrs. Thompson led me in to the office where she sat down and filled out a bunch of papers. We met with the principal who looked it all over. “Seems like everything is in order. I don’t see any problems from your previous school. I hope you’ll like it here.”

  We were then sent to the guidance office so they could work up a schedule for me. We talked as they flipped through my transcript. I was in tenth grade, but certainly nowhere near the top of my class. I was average. C’s were what I did best. I didn’t really care, I wasn’t sure there was anything out there for me after high school.

  “You can start tomorrow,” the counselor said. “Pick up a copy of your schedule as you head out.”

  Back in the car, Mrs. Thompson asked, “Was that necklace from your family?”

  “I guess.” I shrugged. “I’ve always had it.”

  “It looks very old. Does it open?”

  “I don’t think so.” I fiddled with it a little bit, dragging it back and forth.

  When we got back home, I plopped myself down in front of the TV and watched it for the rest of the day. Mrs. Thompson checked on me a few times. “We have books,” she said.

  “I’m not a big reader.”

  “Okay. Let me know if you need anything.”

  I nodded and went back to watching TV. I realized I was playing with my necklace again. I took it off and looked at it. I wondered where it came from. Was it from my parents? Why
did they leave it with me? If they didn’t want me, why leave anything at all? I wondered what it was they didn’t like about me. Did they just not want children? Or was it me in particular? Maybe I just didn’t fit in at home either.

  A few tears fell down my cheeks. All my life I had felt like I didn’t belong. My parents ditched me. Every foster home got rid of me. Every friend I thought I had turned out not to be a friend. I was truly alone and it sucked in every way.

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