The Better Man

by Len Webster

  Oh God, Will.

  She wasn’t surprised one single bit. The love of her life was a hero. He was selfless. He was a wonderful, giving man.

  “Before they got me out of there, I asked him if there was someone I could find for him. He was dying. I couldn’t let him die without letting him say goodbye.”

  She couldn’t let him die.

  Her heart gave out. They weren’t just words Philomena wanted to tell her. They were Will’s last words.

  “They were for you,” she revealed.

  “For … m-me?” she stammered out.

  Philomena nodded. “Would you like to hear them?”

  Savannah nodded her head; the ache in her entire being made it hard for her to breathe. “Please.”

  “Do you mind waiting?”

  “Oh,” Savannah uttered, disappointed for a moment. “Of course. You just survived something horrific and gave birth. You must be so tired. I’ll wait.”

  Philomena smiled as she wiped away her tears. “Good, because he’ll want to tell you himself once he comes out of surgery.”

  Forty-five

  Savannah

  “He’s …” Savannah shook her head in disbelief. “He’s alive?”

  Philomena nodded. “He stopped breathing just before. My son told a doctor, and they got to him in time. He should be out of surgery soon. There was blood in his chest cavity. But he’ll be okay.”

  With her free hand, Savannah covered her face and sobbed.

  The relief was breathtaking.

  He’s alive.

  I can tell him.

  We have a second chance.

  “Thank you,” Savannah said, lowering her hand from her face. “Thank you for telling me. I’ve spent the past twenty-four hours waiting at South Station. I didn’t know how to find him. I knew he wasn’t dead. I knew it.”

  Philomena wiped her own tears away as she released Savannah’s hand. “They said he kept fighting. I know he kept fighting to come back to you, Savannah.”

  “I have to call his family and tell them.”

  She nodded. “Of course.”

  “I’ll come back soon. I’d love to meet your son. The one Will protected.”

  “I would love that.”

  Savannah smiled once more, spun around, and made her way out of the hospital room. She went down the hall to the waiting room. She reached into her jacket and pulled out her phone. Her hands shook as she unlocked it. Tears continued to roll down her face as she called her best friend.

  “Savannah?” Alex answered, her voice tight with fear.

  Savannah let out a relieved exhale, elated to share the news. “He’s alive.”

  “Oh, my God!” her best friend spat out.

  “He’s in surgery at Massachusetts General. I haven’t seen him yet, but he’s alive.”

  Alex sniffled. “We’re all on our way. We’ll be there soon, Sav.”

  “I’ll see you soon,” Savannah said as she hung up.

  She slumped against the wall and burst into tears. Tears of relief and happiness. Tears because the world hadn’t taken him from her. Tears because she knew he would get to live a happy life.

  Forty-six

  Will

  It was a fight.

  His body didn’t feel like his own.

  In fact, his body felt wrong.

  Part of him was warm, and other parts were cold.

  His eyelids were heavy as he tried to open them.

  But then he heard a small voice say, “Mr. Will?”

  He knew that voice. Heard it in the darkness as he held onto the little light that guided him through it. He knew that voice as he shielded the young boy with his body so he wouldn’t get hurt. Will was so happy to hear that voice.

  He fought through the numbness to find the little boy’s face close to his. “Hey, little man.”

  He grinned. “You’re awake again.”

  Again.

  It all started to come back to Will.

  He remembered waking up and being unable to breathe. The heart rate monitor projected his struggles, but he couldn’t let the boy see him that way. So Will asked him to get his mom, hoping he wouldn’t see him die. Because Will felt like he was dying.

  “I’m awake again,” Will confirmed.

  “Are you going to stay awake?” JJ asked.

  He nodded. “I plan on it.” Then his fingers brushed against something sharp, and he glanced down to find the broken fire truck next to him. “Your fire truck … it’s broken.”

  JJ sat back down on the seat that was next to the bed Will laid on. “It’s okay. I thought it might help you the way the firefighters and their trucks helped me and my momma.”

  “It did,” Will said. “How are you feeling? Are you hurt?”

  The little boy pointed at the cast on his arm. “I have a broken wrist. I’m going to get my friends at school to sign it, but …”

  Will’s brows furrowed in concern. “But?”

  JJ’s green eyes sparkled with hope. “When you’re better, can you be the first to sign it?”

  Will laughed. It hurt to do so, but he didn’t care. He laughed because it felt like life, and he wasn’t suffocating. That heaviness in his chest had eased. “I would be honored to.”

  There was a knock on the door, and a man in a white coat entered the room. “Hello, Mr. Lawrence. I’m Dr. Singh. JJ, do you mind giving us a moment?”

  “Yes, Doctor. I’ll be back, Mr. Will.” He jumped off the chair and ran out of the room, yelling, “Momma! Mr. Will’s awake!”

  “He’s a good kid,” Will remarked.

  The doctor nodded. “He is. He came and got us after you crashed. You’re a lucky man. How are you feeling?”

  Will glanced down at the fire truck and smiled. He’d get JJ a new one once he was cleared to leave. It was far too broken and unsafe for him to be playing with. He glanced back up at the doctor. “Fine. Parts of me don’t feel right, but I’m guessing that’s the drugs?”

  Dr. Singh nodded as he walked to the end of the bed. “You’re lucky to be alive. Your legs were crushed. Your lungs collapsed. You lost a lot of blood. You died, but you came back.”

  I died …

  His first thought was of Savannah.

  He couldn’t leave her.

  Not without telling her.

  “Your dad said you used to run marathons.”

  Will nodded. “I did. I haven’t for some time. Wait. How did you know that? Is my dad here?”

  The doctor grinned. “Your entire family is here. You’ve got a lot of pins and metal in your legs, Mr. Lawrence. You won’t be able to run like you used to. You’re lucky you’ll able to walk. We were scared we would have to amputate. In time, you will run again.”

  Relief flooded his chest. “I’m pretty lucky.”

  “Sadly, you’ll have to be in the hospital for a while,” Dr. Singh announced.

  Will didn’t care. “I’m just happy to be alive. Dr. Singh, is there a girl out there for me? Her name’s Savannah. Is she here?”

  Dr. Singh smiled. “She’s here. She made the news.”

  “She did?”

  He nodded. “She did.” Then the doctor walked over to the nightstand next to the bed, grabbed the remote, and turned on the TV.

  Will’s heart came to a stop as Savannah was on the screen, hearing that the woman Will saved wanted to see her.

  That look of relief was heartbreaking to see.

  He had worried her.

  But that’s not all that Will saw.

  The hope in her eyes.

  The longing.

  The heartbreak.

  He could see her love for him in her pain.

  “I’ll go get her for you,” Dr. Singh said before he set the remote down and exited the room, leaving Will to watch as Savannah ran into the hospital on the small TV.

  Forty-seven

  Savannah

  “He’d like to see Savannah first.”

  Those were the six words Dr. Singh said after he wal
ked through the double doors and stood in front of Will’s family and Savannah in the waiting room—his nonna, nonno, and uncle Johnny arriving this afternoon. As Savannah turned to tell his parents and sisters to go before her, they shook their heads, wanting her to see him first.

  Her legs shook as she followed the doctor down the hall.

  They had passed JJ waiting outside of Will’s room. He was with his uncle, and Savannah had smiled at the little boy who guarded Will.

  “He’s waiting for you,” Dr. Singh said.

  Savannah stared at the closed door, her chest heaving.

  Thoughts paralyzed her.

  “Are you okay?”

  Savannah nodded. “For a moment, I thought I lost him,” she admitted, ashamed of her thoughts. “Now, I’m just trying to figure out what to say so he knows how much he means to me.”

  The doctor reached over and opened the door for her. “The words will come to you. Believe me.”

  With another nod, she inhaled a deep breath and stepped into the hospital room. She glanced over to find him sitting up, focused on the TV on the wall. Then those light brown eyes she loved found her, and he began to cry.

  “Savannah,” he whispered.

  It was all she needed to race to him. The moment she reached him, she cradled his face, her eyes sweeping his face. He was alive. He was here with her. She thanked God.

  Promised Him and the universe to be a better person as she whispered, “I love you, Will.”

  Tears fell down his face as his lips parted in awe. “You love me?”

  Savannah nodded, brushing his tears away. “I was going to tell you that night. I thought we had time. I thought I lost you,” she sobbed. “I love you, Will.”

  He nodded as he leaned forward and brushed his lips over hers. For a moment, everything was right as he kissed her. He didn’t say it back. And for Savannah, she’d wait. He had just gone through a traumatic experience. An experience that might change how he felt about her.

  But so long as he was alive, and he knew she loved him, her life found its peace.

  Each kiss felt like life.

  As she waited for someday to reach them, he whispered, “Sweetheart,” and pulled back. “You’re the only constellation I want to look at every day for the rest of my life.”

  Savannah pressed her fingers over the small cuts on his face. They would heal in time. Just like his broken legs. And Savannah would be there for him.

  Every single step.

  With every single day.

  A knock on the door had her pulling away to find Lori with tears in her eyes. “You’re alive,” she breathed as if she couldn’t believe it.

  “Come here,” Will said as Savannah stepped away from his bed.

  Lori ran to her brother and threw her arms around him, sobbing into his chest. “I’m so sorry, Will. I’m so sorry. You were on that train because of me. You shouldn’t have been. You almost died because of me.”

  Will brushed the back of Lori’s head. “It’s not your fault, Lori. It’s not. I had to be there.”

  “I’m sorry,” Lori whispered as she pulled back, sitting on Will’s bed.

  “As your brother, Lori, I will be wherever you need me to be. Don’t blame yourself. If I hadn’t been there, I wouldn’t have been there to protect Philomena and her sons. We should concentrate on that instead. I love you, Lori.”

  “I love you, too, Will.”

  It was strange how envious she was.

  To hear Will say I love you and not be toward her.

  Someday, Savannah told herself.

  Someday he might love me, too.

  Then Savannah felt her phone vibrate in her jacket pocket and pulled it out, expecting it to be her father. Instead, she saw a name she hadn’t wanted to see. So she smiled at Will and his curious gaze. “I’ll get the rest of your family.”

  Once Savannah left his room, she unlocked her phone and read the message.

  Walter: I’m sorry, Savannah. I saw you on the news. I hope Will’s okay. I never meant to hurt you. I shouldn’t have gotten him fired. I was angry I had lost you. I always knew you deserved better than me. I wish you nothing but happiness with him. You deserve it. I’m sorry I always hurt you.

  Savannah could reply and thank him for his honesty. But her silence would be enough as she locked her phone, saying goodbye to Walter Vidović with the hope that maybe he might get better.

  He just needed a better woman than Savannah.

  And she would ask for that the next time she spoke to the stars.

  Forty-eight

  Will

  “Will, I’d like you to meet my son,” Philomena said as the nurse placed the incubator by Will’s bed. He peered inside to find the beautiful baby boy. He was small, but Will knew he would get bigger. He was a fighter. Just like his mom and brother.

  It was close to seven p.m., and Will had just said goodbye to his family. He had fallen asleep during his last conversation with them, and when he woke up, they promised to see him in the morning. Savannah had stood in a corner and was patient. But every time he looked over at her, she gave him the most heartbreaking smile he had ever seen. She was in pain. He could feel it.

  He knew why she ached.

  She told him he loved her.

  Savannah Peters loved him.

  But he couldn’t say he loved her back.

  He did.

  He loved her like his lungs loved fresh air, and his heart loved a brand new beat.

  He just couldn’t say it.

  “What’s his name?” Will asked with a smile as the nurse left the room.

  Will knew that he would have a connection with Philomena and her sons for the rest of his life. JJ had already claimed that they were best friends. He had even left his fire truck, his prized possession, in Will’s care.

  “His name is William Fresno,” Philomena said as she brushed her tears away.

  “You named him after me?” His chest burst with warmth and love.

  She nodded. “I did. You saved our lives, Will. And JJ adores you. He’s usually shy around people, but he’s been telling the nurses that you’re friends.”

  “We are friends.”

  “He also said he told you to call him by his real name.”

  Will frowned. “He did?” he asked. His memory of the past few days lacked. There were holes in what he remembered.

  “He told you to call him Joseph.”

  His body tensed. “Joseph?”

  Philomena nodded. “He’s named after my husband’s father. Joseph senior. But he doesn’t like the nickname Joe so we call him JJ.”

  Joe.

  Will remembered his mother’s fiancé, his nonna’s son. He was a hero. And maybe Joe Perconte had been looking out for Will on that train.

  “Are you okay?” she asked, voice tight with worry.

  He nodded. “My mom was engaged to a firefighter named Joe before she met my dad. He died saving many lives and doing the job he loved.”

  “Heroes follow you.” Philomena smiled as her son let out a soft cry. “Savannah seems sad.”

  “You noticed.” He paused. “She told me she loved me.”

  Her lips curved as she looked up at him. “You must be over the moon since you told her—”

  “Told her?”

  “You don’t remember?”

  He shook his head. “I know I care about her. My memories are a mess right now.”

  Philomena reached over and grasped his hand. “Do you love Savannah?”

  Do I love Savannah?

  “Yes,” he whispered. “But what if she only loves me because …”

  He couldn’t finish his sentence, already knowing the insanity of it. Savannah wasn’t that kind of woman. She loved him. He saw it on her face and remembered it in her eyes as they made love.

  We made love the night before …

  “What did I say to you on the train? I remember I said something before I blacked out.”

  She squeezed his hand. “You told me to te
ll her you love her because she was the only one who didn’t know.”

  His heart stopped as his eyes widened. “No,” he breathed in agreement, “she still doesn’t know.”

  “She loves you, Will. When she came to the hospital, I saw it on her face. She thought she’d lost you. You should tell her. I didn’t because she needs to hear it from you.”

  Will nodded. “She needs to hear it from me.”

  A knock on the door had him glancing away from the TV. It had been almost half an hour since Will got to meet Philomena’s son. He was beautiful and seeing him left Will at peace with the decisions he’d made that day on the train.

  “Hey,” his ex-partner said as she entered his room. “Any more news?”

  Will shook his head. “They still think it was a deliberate act. They didn’t find any more survivors. I thought you were in New York.”

  Emerson shook her head as she sat down on the chair next to his bed. Her eyes gleamed with unshed tears as she grasped his hand in hers. “Sorry I wasn’t here when you got out of surgery. I thought you’d want time with Savannah and your family.”

  “Emerson …”

  “Yes?”

  He smiled. “You are my family. Always have been. Always will be. Sometimes you’re as annoying as my sisters.”

  She let out a small laugh as tears ran down her face. “There were two times in my life when I’ve been scared.” She brushed her wet cheeks with her free hand. “The first wasn’t when I came out to my parents.”

  “It wasn’t?”

  Emerson shook her head as she gazed down at their joined hands before she lifted her chin, her green eyes on him. “I was scared to come out to you.”

  He flinched, pain seemed to explode throughout him. “Me?”

  “Yes, you,” she confessed. “Will, I knew my parents wouldn’t accept me for not being straight, and I expected it. But I was scared that you wouldn’t accept me.”

  “Why wouldn’t I accept you, Emerson?”