As Sick As Our Secrets

by Diane Ezzard

  “Oh, but it is my business. Cassie was a friend of mine.”

  “You cow,” she shouted, “trying to turn it around on me when you’ve been shagging a murderer all this time.”

  “Laura!” I screamed. “That’s not true.”

  At that point, we heard Mrs Donoghue calling up the stairs, “What’s going on?” It made us both quieten down.

  “Nothing Mum,” Laura said. She thought for a moment. I was afraid of what she was going to do next. Her nostrils flared, and she glared at me but then she sat on the bed.

  “There’s a lot you don’t know about Cassie.”

  “Yeah, I’m finding that out.” She weighed me up. At that point, I acknowledged I had felt disturbed when I walked in Cassie’s old room. Initially, it was Laura’s outburst that unnerved me but this bedroom seemed totally out of synch. All the walls were painted a bright cerise pink colour that would even have made Barbie flinch.

  There were posters on the wall. I could just about accept the ones of Brad Pitt and George Clooney but seeing Batman, Spiderman and Elsa out of Frozen up there - I found weird. Even the duvet cover had a scene from Frozen on it. The room was also adorned with hundreds of Beanie Babies. I had never seen so many stuffed toys, not even in a shop. There were dolls and teddy bears sat in neat rows on the pillow. What this told me about Cassie’s personality, I wasn’t sure but it did seem a little bizarre as she’d been a young woman when she moved out.

  “Swear to me you aren’t involved with Charlie,” she said

  “I promise you, I’m not.” The memory of the kiss we shared came back to me but I brazened it out. “So what don’t I know, Laura?” Laura gave an ugly laugh.

  “No, you tell me what you know?” She gave me a sly look that told me that I wouldn’t be on her Christmas card list.

  Suddenly the door opened and in walked Laura’s mum.

  “Mum,” Laura cried, “it’s rude to walk in without knocking.”

  “I just wanted to check you girls are alright after hearing raised voices.”

  “You wanted to snoop around you mean,” Laura said. She turned to me. “Well we’re fine, aren’t we Sophie?” Laura had a pinched expression. I nodded. I didn’t want to get involved in any domestic situation. “Anyway,” Laura continued, “I was just telling Sophie what a liar our Cassie could be.”

  “I don’t want you speaking ill of the dead, after all, she was your sister.”

  “Yeah, but she was a sicko.”

  “Laura, I’ll not tolerate talk like this in my house.”

  “It’s my house too,” Laura argued. Mrs Donoghue looked down at her daughter. I could tell she was holding in her feelings. She bit her lip.

  “I’m going to leave you two girls to it.” She quickly walked back out the door. Just as quickly, the door opened again, and she popped her head round. “I’m sorry you had to witness that, Sophie.” I put my hand up to indicate it wasn’t a problem. She closed the door again leaving me with Laura.

  “Nosey cow,” she said. I didn’t reply. I didn’t intend to antagonise her. I sat there silently for a few minutes while Laura calmed down. Finally, she spoke.

  “So you want to know about Cassie, do you?”

  “If you’ve something you’ve got to tell me then yes.” She gave me a dirty look.

  “Cassie was a compulsive liar. She couldn’t help herself. She had been doing it from an early age. She saw psychiatrists and psychologists but she never got better. The lies kept coming. I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, your honour, what a joke,” she mimicked.

  “So what was a lie when it came to Charlie?” She didn’t answer my question but continued.

  “I knew Charlie long before she did. We hung about with the same crowd. I’d had a fling with him and we’d fallen out. Our relationship was always off and on. He always wanted to keep me a secret. I don’t think I’ve ever been good enough for him plus he enjoyed the excitement of keeping it from people.” She shook her head.

  “We were volatile when we got together but I couldn’t stand to be apart from him. Then he got with Cassie. I thought he was only doing it to get back at me but Charlie is a player of the first degree. He has made playing women an art. It crucified me. When I knew he was serious about Cassie my whole world came tumbling down. I stopped speaking to Cassie, and I sent a lot of abusive text messages to Charlie.”

  “I don’t understand. If you feel like this about him why are you helping him?” I asked.

  “I love him.” She put her head in her hands. “I’ve always loved him but he messed with my head so much by getting with Cassie.”

  “So were you seeing him throughout the time they were together?”

  “Off and on, yes.”

  “And did Cassie know?”

  “No. She suspected he was seeing someone, but she didn’t know it was me.”

  “Why did you keep it from her?”

  “It’s difficult to explain, but she had lots of issues and I didn’t want to create any more distance between us. We didn’t speak for a long time but Cassie was a part of me. From a young age, it was always just the two of us. We weren’t allowed to play out with other kids so that made a special bond between us. Mum only reneged on that when we rebelled against her. I don’t know if you know but Mum and Dad lost a child through cot death?”

  “Yes, I knew about that.”

  “Well, it meant, our childhood was stifled by Mum.”

  “Can I ask you something?” I said.

  “What?” she raised her eyebrows.

  “Does your mum know about the prostitution?”

  “Yes, unfortunately. The police told her. As if she wasn’t devastated enough. She’s been through a lot with Cassie.”

  “Yes, I can imagine it must have been tough hearing that about her daughter. So what about the domestic violence she came to see me about?”

  “Well, I’ve known Charlie for years, and he’s never hit me. He might have pushed and shoved me a few times but nothing serious and I goaded him into doing it. Cassie had a track record of not telling the truth so I’m afraid to say I believe Charlie over my sister.”

  “I don’t know what to make of all of this.” I shook my head. “For what it’s worth, I don’t think Charlie’s right for you.” Laura laughed at my comment.

  “Don’t I know it. Unfortunately, he’s like a drug to me. I can’t keep away from him. He has a hold on me. He’s a real charmer. When we split up, I just wanted him more. I became obsessed with him and he was all I thought about morning, noon and night.”

  “Yes, I’ve seen how he can be,” Laura stared at me. Her expression was serious. “Don’t worry,” I continued, “I’m not interested.” I hoped I sounded convincing.

  “Hmm,” Laura muttered.

  “So what are you going to do about Charlie?” I asked.

  “I believe that Charlie’s innocent but I don’t know what I can do for him. The police keep an eye on our place so he can’t come here. They’re probably tailing me as well but I want to be with him and whatever happens, I will be there for him. We’ve both got pay-as-you-go phones to speak in secret.” At this news, I flinched.

  “Be careful, Laura. I’ve already got myself on the wrong side of the law over Charlie.”

  “He’s on my mind 24/7. I wish I could drop him but it’s not happening and he can be very persuasive.”

  The mood between the two of us had improved.

  After a few minutes of silence, Laura volunteered, “There’s something really bad about Cassie that you probably don’t know about.”

  “Oh?” Laura shook her head.

  “Cassie always told lies from being very small. True, most kids do if it gets them out of trouble. She would blame me for something she’d done wrong. The problem with Cassie was, the lies never stopped. The worst was at school, in her teens. She told everyone she slept with Mr Brambles, her art teacher. He was suspended from his job whilst they carried out an investigation. Becaus
e of the psychological reports on Cassie, saying she was unstable, he was reinstated, but he left teaching soon after because mud sticks. People had thrown bricks through his windows and he had been ostracised by his neighbours in the area where he lived. Eventually, he moved away to make a new life for himself. Cassie never admitted to telling a lie. Then she did the same thing with Uncle Joe. She made claims that he molested her when she was small.” I listened open-mouthed. I put my hand over my mouth in shock.

  “No!” I cried.

  “Huh, it wasn’t true.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “She’d made that story up as well.”

  “How do you know?”

  “Uncle Joe got ill with cancer and we thought it was terminal and that he was going to die. She tried to make her peace with him on what she thought was his deathbed. She apologised for making the story up but Uncle Joe survived. Mum didn’t speak to her for a long time after that because Joe was her brother but Dad forgave her. He had been through enough with her and believed life was too short to hold grudges against your family. I’m sure her behaviour was attention seeking. I also believe she made the stories up about Charlie hitting her to get sympathy and win our parent's affection back.”

  “And did it work?”

  “Yes, but they both know that Cassie wasn’t well mentally.”

  “But she had bruises when she came to see me a lot of the time.”

  “I wouldn’t put it past her to have done that to herself, but I also go along with what Charlie suggested that it might have been Randy.”

  “It seems so very strange. Why would Charlie stay with her if she told lies all the time?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe she’s good in bed or can cook up a good lasagne. I’ve asked myself that question over and over. I’ve even asked Charlie hundreds of times but he said he loved her and wanted to help her. Perhaps he enjoyed being her protector, not that it did much good.”

  “I can’t believe I was taken in by her.”

  “Everybody was. She was very good. Uncle Joe, Mr Brambles and Charlie knew how convincing she could be and suffered because of it. It was a devastating time for the whole family and hard to forgive.”

  I was lost for words.

  Chapter 20

  SOPHIE

  I had sleepless nights, churning over everything Laura told me. I couldn’t believe I had been so taken in by Cassie. It made me question my ability to do my job. I always thought of myself as highly perceptive and trusted my judgement of people but now I wasn’t so sure.

  All these secrets that were coming out, I needed to run the information past someone. I didn’t particularly want to go to the police. I still didn’t know if I was being charged myself. I thought about the one person I could go to with my ideas surrounding the case. Someone who would hopefully welcome new information with open arms and maybe this time wouldn’t be hostile towards me and he was rather good looking.

  I didn’t want to wait until the next time I saw him at a meeting because I didn’t know when that would be. I knew Joyce had his phone number. I asked her to pass on my number to him and to tell him I had news about Cassie’s case. She obliged, and he contacted me within the hour of me speaking to Joyce.

  “Sophie, what can I do for you?” My knees began to knock as I heard Jack’s voice.

  “It’s more what I can do for you.” I blushed. I knew I was flirting with him. Either he didn’t notice, or he didn’t take the bait.

  “You’ve got some information?”

  “Yes, that’s right, but I’d rather speak to you in person to discuss it.”

  “Well, I’m sure that can be arranged. Are you free this evening?”

  We made plans to get together that night in the centre of Bury. I put the phone down and smiled. I don’t know why you’re getting excited, girl, I said to myself. It wasn’t as though it was a date or anything. I was just passing on what I knew.

  I got ready that evening, taking more care than usual with my appearance. I put on my favourite green top, the one I’d had a few positive comments about. I didn’t think Jack would notice, but it made me feel better knowing I’d made the effort.

  I arrived five minutes early and Jack was already seated. He rose to greet me.

  “You look nice,” he said, smiling. Pang. My efforts had been worth it after all.

  “What are you having to drink? It’s my treat,” he asked.

  “I’ll have a skinny latte please,” I grinned. I felt sure he must have guessed I liked him by the silly faces I pulled in his company.

  I sat down and waited for Jack to return with the drinks. He’d found us a quiet corner to sit in. We had a long chat keeping the talk to news surrounding the case. I told him what Laura had said to me. I talked that much, my mouth was dry. I had some theories that I was excited to share with Jack.

  “I can’t sleep because I’m thinking about the investigation,” I told him. My arms were waving about as I expressed my opinions. “Well, that and other reasons.” I winked at him.

  “Got something in your eye, Sophie?” He smiled. I ignored his comment.

  “It’s only women’s intuition but I’ve got a hunch that Charlie is innocent.” He seemed bemused by my manner.

  “So, if it’s not Charlie, who do you think did it?”

  “Well, I’ve been considering the possibilities. Laura, her sister was having an affair with Charlie so she may have wanted to be rid of her sister.” Jack’s mouth narrowed, and he nodded. “There are three others with a motive,” I continued.

  “Go on,” he said. I watched his expression but I couldn’t tell if he was taking me seriously or not.

  “After what Laura told me about Cassie’s lies, then her Uncle Joe might still be holding a deep-rooted grudge and there’s also Randy, who Cassie double-crossed.”

  “Okay, so they’ve all got the motives. What about alibis?”

  “Charlie didn’t have one, but that’s as much as I know.”

  “I shouldn’t be telling you this but you’ve got yourself involved, and it is useful for me to have a sounding board.” I thought to myself, oh thanks, Jack, is that how you see me as a sounding board. For now, though that would have to do.

  “I’m sure Laura can be ruled out,” he said.

  “Oh, and why’s that then?” He looked at me with a serious expression.

  “I got information from an ex-police colleague of mine and the body was moved plus there was a footprint indentation found at the scene size nine.”

  “Okay, that definitely rules out a woman then I’d say.” I was getting good at this.

  “It’d be interesting to find out the shoe size of the three guys.”

  “Well, Charlie is a size nine because he told me that was one piece of evidence they were holding him on. However, they haven’t found any of his shoes to match the print.”

  “Have you any idea where this uncle Joe guy lives?” he asked.

  “Laura mentioned visiting him in his bungalow in Little Lever.”

  “Well, that’s not far to pay him a visit. Do you know his surname?”

  “No, but I can find out. Is there anything else you want me to do?”

  “Yeah stay out of this. It’s not for someone like you, Sophie.” I felt offended when he said that. He watched my expression then his tone changed. “The only thing is I know you’re too much like me. You’re not going to take a blind bit of notice of anything I say so I suppose I better let you help me.” I smiled and wondered if he was warming to me.

  “So are you taking me on as a volunteer then?” I asked.

  Jack just shook his head and smiled.

  “What am I going to do with you, Sophie?”

  I laughed but then his expression changed.

  “Seriously, you don’t know what you’re getting yourself into if you tag along with me.”

  “As the saying goes, fools rush in where angels fear to tread.”

  “If you’re sure you want to get involved. I’m up to here
with work at the moment.” He held his hand up in front of his nose. “There’s only so many extramarital affairs a private detective can follow up on and with this on top, it’s keeping me busy. That’s why I haven’t been going to as many meetings lately.”

  I was glad that Jack was ready to accept my help. I loved being around him and whatever Cassie was or wasn’t she was still my friend at the end of the day.

  I didn’t have anything to do the following evening, so I arranged to meet up with Jack to discuss things further. This time it was more formal in that we met at his office. It was a small office in a building above a shop in Bury, close to where I worked. He told me he worked alone as he couldn’t afford a PA. His calls transferred to a virtual assistant service and someone came in once a week on a Friday to inspect his books.

  “I could do that for you,” I said eager to please.

  “Whoa, not so fast,” he put up his hand to indicate a stop sign. “You’re already doing more than you should.” My mouth dropped and my shoulders stooped.

  “But I used to work in the accountancy field.”

  “A girl of hidden talents, eh?” I smiled and our eyes met. My mouth felt dry as my eyes lit up.

  “Sophie, I can’t just get rid of Kelly. She’s a student, and she needs the money.”

  “Okay, it was only a suggestion.”

  “I’ll bear it in mind for future reference. Anyway, I thought you wanted to be a detective?”

  “What is it they say in the meetings, the only thing I can’t do is drink.”

  Jack walked over to his filing cabinet and pulled out a file. The room was surprisingly tidy for a busy man who worked alone.

  I told him I hadn’t realised how close he was to my workplace. I said I could pop in from time to time on my lunch break if it helped. He agreed with that idea and it soon became almost a daily occurrence. I would come and eat my sandwiches if he was around and we would sit and discuss the case. He told me he would do what he could to find out Randy’s shoe size. I offered to see if I would find out any more about Cassie’s uncle Joe.

  “Be careful, Jack. When I tried to get close to Randy, I was warned off in no uncertain terms.”