As Sick As Our Secrets

by Diane Ezzard

  “And the damage to the car?”

  “Simon knew someone and was able to sort that out somehow without the police getting suspicious.”

  “So, was that the end of the matter?”

  “Yes, apart from the fact it has never sat well with me. It has been eating away at me for years. To make matters worse, I now believe the guy I hit might have been Randy.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  “Because I know his limp was caused as a result of a hit-and-run accident he was involved in.”

  “Oh, I see.”

  “It’s not good, is it? Whatever Randy did in the past, he didn’t deserve to be left there to die.”

  “And how do you feel about it now?”

  “I regret everything. I have nightmares about it.” Joyce came over and comforted me. In that moment she felt like the mother I had never known. Mum never consoled me, even from being very small. She always expected me to be tough and deal with things.

  “Thank you for trusting me with that,” Joyce said. I wiped my eyes. We sat for a few minutes holding hands.

  “Thank you for listening.” I felt apprehensive. “So are you going to go to the police with the information I have told you?” Joyce looked over at me.

  “What good would that do?”

  “Well, you always talk about doing the right thing.”

  “Randy’s dead, isn’t he?”

  “Yes, but…”

  “Raking up that incident wouldn’t change anything. I believe you have suffered enough.” I looked at her with intensity on my face, taking in her wisdom.

  “Thank you, Joyce.”

  “It’s going to be okay, Sophie. You’ve done a very brave thing, sharing this with me. We’ll do some work around it and you’ll get through it. You’ll find some other way to make amends for your actions. Now, do you fancy another cup of tea?”

  I nodded and laughed for the first time and I believed her.

  I woke up the next morning feeling different somehow. I wasn’t sure if it was because I’d discussed things with Joyce I thought I would take to the grave. It could have been that her positive attitude had given me hope for the future. It was probably a bit of both. What I did know was I felt better than I had in a while. Going through my past with Joyce had the desired effect

  Chapter 29

  SOPHIE

  Jack felt Randy’s business held the key to what happened to Cassie although we didn’t seem to be moving any further forward. I was surprised when we got an unexpected lead in the form of Georgia.

  I was out running by the river a few days later when my phone rang. It was unusual for anyone to phone that early in the morning so I was especially surprised when I looked at the screen and saw Georgia was calling me. I stopped running and answered it straightaway.

  “Sophie, I need to see you. I’m going insane.” She sounded agitated. I thought for a moment.

  “I could meet you at lunchtime in Bury if you can get over here. There’s a coffee shop where I sometimes go to.”

  “Yes, yes, just tell me what time and I’ll reschedule my appointments. I can’t go on much longer like this. I’ve got to do something.”

  “You’ve done the right thing phoning me, Georgia. I’ll help you all I can if we say 12.30 in Mirabel’s? It’s by the side of the station. Is that okay?”

  “Yes, that’s fine. I’ll see you then.” Mirabel’s wasn’t my usual haunt, but it was normally quiet and more discreet than Costa. It was where I used to meet Cassie when she was too afraid to come to the counselling rooms. She’d been afraid of Charlie finding out what she was doing. In fact, the more I thought about Cassie and Charlie, the more I was now inclined to believe Cassie again.

  I managed to get out of work just before 12.30 to meet up with Georgia and she arrived on time. She brushed through the door like a whirlwind. The beige mac she wore was open and showed off her shapely figure. Underneath, she wore a brown top and mustard-coloured leggings. She turned down the offer of food so I got the drinks in. As I returned to where she had found a seat, I couldn’t help but notice the large sparkling engagement ring she wore. It looked new.

  I sat opposite her and watched her take a sip of her coffee. She seemed reticent to speak.

  “To be honest, Georgia, I didn’t expect you to get in touch.” She gave a half-hearted laugh.

  “I don’t think I would have done if I hadn’t felt so bad but…” she looked over at me. I could tell she was weighing me up.

  “You’ll think I’m mad but I don’t want to go to hell.”

  “No, you’re not mad. I’ve been there and I wouldn’t like to go back.” Georgia frowned. She looked confused. I decided to explain. “I’m a recovering alcoholic. Drink took me to the gates of insanity so yes I’ve been to hell and back and it wasn’t pleasant.” In an instant, Georgia warmed to me. Maybe I spoke her language now.

  “I’ve had a couple of bad trips lately on acid. I had a room full of grotesque looking monkeys clawing at me and making faces at me. On another trip, I was introduced to the devil himself and Hitler was stood in the background laughing. I’m sure I’m going insane.” I watched her closely. The usual cocky front she put on had gone. She looked frightened. “And as for flashbacks about finding Randy hanging there, they’re happening all the time.”

  “It’s not for me to say and it might sound hypocritical but I’d give the drugs a wide berth in your current state of mind. You’ve been through a tragic event and you’ve got a lot on your plate. If you want to try counselling, I can find someone else for you to see. It doesn’t have to be me.”

  “I’ll think about it. I was always brought up to tough everything out. I’ve learnt my life lessons the hard way. I’m a graduate of the school of hard knocks but at the moment I feel I’m crumbling.”

  “It’s not surprising, what you’ve been through and I’m sure you can’t have had an easy time with Randy.” Georgia stared at me. Her eyes looked cold and hollow.

  “I know things about that man I shouldn’t know. He’s probably there right now, burning in hell, yet for all of that, I loved him.” I took a large gulp of my coffee.

  “We can’t choose who we fall in love with, Georgia. It can happen and take over our lives and if we love a wrong ‘un then we suffer the consequences, sadly.” Georgia searched my face. I felt she was still trying to decide whether to trust me or not. She looked down at her manicured nail extensions.

  “I think I know why Randy killed himself,” she said. I nodded.

  “You were close to him.”

  “Yes,” she said, “Too close at times. Do you know Alfie was Randy’s son?”

  “I’d suspected it,” I replied.

  “He only found out after his death and I’m certain Randy had something to do with their accident.”

  “Oh dear.” I cleared my throat as I listened. My mouth gaped open.

  “Just before he died, we had a blazing row. He told me what happened between them. Mia recently came to Randy for money. She got herself into a mess financially. They argued apparently, and she got him to do a paternity test. The agreement in terms of paying Randy back was she would do more escort work for him. She agreed, but she wasn’t very happy about it.”

  “She kept missing work and Randy got annoyed. They rowed again. She crossed the line when she threatened to go to the police over the Eastern European girls. So he arranged for her to have an accident, not knowing Alfie would be in the car as well.” I sat there taking in everything she said.

  “Wow.” I hadn’t been expecting that revelation. “So do you think Randy was responsible for Cassie’s death?” Georgia shook her head.

  “No,”

  “You sound certain about that. What makes you so sure?”

  “He had an alibi and I do believe he would have told me if he’d had any involvement with it. He wasn’t impressed with her behaviour but I’m sure he didn’t kill her. I do have my suspicions about someone else though.” Her eyes looked up to the right th
en she scanned the café.

  “Oh?” I said. I watched her closely.

  She glanced at me for a second, checked around the room, then in a hushed voice said, “There’s a businessman that was involved with Randy. He uses his haulage firm to smuggle many of the girls over from Rumania and Poland and places like that.” She went silent for a moment.

  “So why do you think he might be involved?” I asked. Georgia looked me straight in the eye.

  “He uses the escort agency on a regular basis and a number of the girls have complained about him. They have become quite frightened of his aggressive behaviour and he tried to strangle a couple of them.”

  “So why has nothing been done about him?”

  “I told Randy, and I spoke to the guy. He calmed it down for a time but it’s started up again. Because he was Tandy’s business partner and because of his involvement in the logistics of Randy’s operation, it made the matter rather delicate.”

  “But something has to be done.” My voice was raised slightly, and we both looked around us to check we were not being overheard.

  “I know but because of the situation, I can’t exactly go to the police, not that I would anyway.”

  “So who is it this businessman?”

  “I’m sorry, I’m not able to tell you that.” Georgia clammed up. I waited for a few moments.

  “It’s Trevor Darcy, isn’t it?”

  “You know him?” She raised her eyebrows. I nodded.

  “Am I right?”

  “I’d rather not say.”

  “Look I saw the pair of you talking outside the Britannia Hotel. Just tell me something, was he ever offered Cassie’s services?”

  “How was I to know he was Cassie’s boyfriend’s dad? She was fuming when she found out.”

  “I bet she was.” My head was racing. My mouth was dry. A tingling sensation reached my fingers and toes.

  “Oh Georgia,” I hesitated.

  “Yes?”

  “Before I go, can I just ask you something about Randy’s limp?”

  “What about it?”

  “It was the result of a hit-and-run accident, wasn’t it?”

  “Yes it was, why do you ask?”

  “Oh, no reason just curious and did it happen by the Cliff in Salford?”

  “Yeah, that’s right. Five years ago it was but why do you want to know now?”

  “I’m just surprised I never saw anything about it in the papers at the time, that’s all.”

  “No, Randy never reported it. He said he would find out who did it and deal with it himself but he never found the culprit.”

  “So, whoever did it, it looks like they’ve got away with it now.”

  Georgia gave me a strange look. She frowned.

  “It does,” she said.

  “That’s a shame,” I gave a half smile and looked over at her. My heart was beating fast. Her eyes were boring into mine. I didn’t want her thinking too much about what I’d said. I offered for her to come in and see one of the other counsellors for bereavement counselling and she said she would. It was time for me to go back to work so we said our goodbyes and I promised to keep in touch.

  I had to contact Jack to let him know what I had found out. I sent him a text telling him I had important news and needed to speak to him after work.

  I hadn’t been able to get hold of him. He messaged me to say he had a client in and had to work late. I was restless, eager to carry on with going to see Trevor Darcy. I decided to go up to their house. Even though I now suspected he could be a dangerous man, I thought I would be safe if his wife was there.

  After work, I drove over to Whitefield. I pulled up outside their imposing house and looked up at the large gates. I checked if any message had come through from Jack since I let him know what I was doing but there was nothing. My heart beat fast, and I felt nauseous as I climbed out of my car and walked up to their intercom system.

  I saw both cars up the drive, parked outside their large home. Good, they were both home. This only compounded the nervousness I felt. Should I wait for Jack or should I proceed? I decided I could not wait. I didn’t want Trevor Darcy leaving the property before I had a chance to speak to him and Pauline. I pressed the buzzer and waited. No one answered. I frowned and pressed it again. Still nothing. I gave it a third go. Where were they?

  Something wasn’t right. I walked along the perimeter of their property to see if I could see anything. The house was enclosed with a large wall on two sides and high railings on the other two. I walked as far as I could around the whole property. I came back to the front gates and tried to ring again but got no reply. Suddenly, I heard a click and realised the gates had been released so I pushed one gate forward and eased my body through the gap.

  My heart rate increased tenfold. A brain cell inside me told me this wasn’t a good idea but I couldn’t stop myself. I walked up to the front door and knocked. Nobody came. I knocked some more but nothing happened.

  I walked slowly around the side of the house. I didn’t hear any sounds. Tentatively, I opened the gate that led to the back garden, still looking, still listening. I felt more scared than I had ever felt before and I should have turned and gone back but something egged me on. I noticed an open kitchen window and wondered if I could climb up and get inside. I decided to give the window frame a jolt. It opened wider. My hands were shaking.

  I looked around me before I pulled myself up onto the outer ledge and stuck my head and upper body through the open gap. Pushing my body up, I heaved the rest of my frame over the wooden ledge and snaked down onto the windowsill below. I did a handstand walk onto the drainer until my legs were through the window. I made quite a loud noise as I jumped down, so went and hid behind the door in case someone came.

  It suddenly dawned on me if everything was okay in the house, I would have a lot of explaining to do, if I got caught here. My suspicions were realised when I peered around the corner of the L-shaped kitchen. My chest felt heavy. I noticed an arm, lying on the floor. My limbs began to shake as I slowly moved towards it. My eyes followed the arm’s length and I saw the rest of the body lying there. It was the housekeeper. I crouched over her. She wasn’t breathing. I quickly took out my phone to dial the emergency services but was stopped in my tracks.

  “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Trevor Darcy stood in the doorway. I jumped. “Oh, it’s you,” I tried to back into the corner. The kitchen door was locked, and there was no other escape route. I searched around the room looking for something I could use as a weapon. Trevor’s eyes followed mine, and he shook his head. My mouth felt dry, and I had difficulty swallowing.

  “No, I don’t think so Sophie.” He watched me. The tingling of my nerve endings worked their way through my body.

  “What… what happened to the housekeeper?” My voice was shaky. I was trying my best to keep the conversation normal. He gave a short sarcastic laugh.

  “You shouldn’t be meddling in other people’s business.” He advanced towards me and I took a step backwards. I hunched my body with my arms crossed against my chest in a protective huddle.

  “Where’s Pauline?” He strode across the floor towards me.

  “You’re too nosy for your own good.” His expression was now in a grimace. He took hold of my right hand and squeezed it. He used an enormous amount of pressure. I froze. He grabbed my hair with his free hand and pulled my head back. With his face contorted, his breath was hot as he spat out his words.

  “You silly, silly bitch. Why did you have to get involved?” He pushed me against the wall. I had no chance against his strength. His fingers curled around my neck. I cried out. I kicked him but he pushed his strong body further into mine. I struggled to move. I looked into his eyes. They were full of hatred. My lungs burned with pain. The pressure in my neck intensified. I couldn’t breathe.

  The edge of my vision went dark. I was thrashing out, and I dug my fingernails into his wrists. I pulled against his fingers, trying to prise them off me but
it was futile. My head spun, and I gasped for air. I felt my life force was slipping away. Small rapid gasps left my throat. My mouth was open, and I coughed. His hands continued to squeeze my neck. My body slumped to the ground, and I passed out.

  Chapter 30

  SOPHIE

  The room was hazy at first and I heard noises in the background, a door being kicked in. As my senses came back to me, I felt a severe pain in my neck. I tried to speak but my voice was hoarse. I looked to my side and Jack was there, crouched down, cupping my head in his hands.

  “How are you, Sophie?” I couldn’t speak. There were a lot of police officers in the room. I blinked. Had I just seen them march Trevor Darcy out of the door?

  “What happened?” I whispered.

  “It looks like we arrived in the nick of time for you but not sadly in time to save the housekeeper or Mrs Darcy.”

  “No!” I tried to scream, but the noise was muffled. A few minutes later the paramedics arrived. I was taken to hospital to be checked over and Jack joined me. We met up again in the emergency department.

  “Whatever possessed you, Sophie, to go it alone without me?”

  “I was worried Trevor was getting out of control.”

  Deep down, once I suspected Trevor had killed Cassie, I wanted to catch him, to get him to confess. I felt it might give me some redemption for the wrong I had done. I realised now how foolish my actions had been.

  “You should have waited for me. He was far too powerful for you.”

  “I mistakenly expected I’d be able to talk to him in front of his wife. I thought I’d be safe enough with Pauline there.”

  “You silly girl,” Jack shook his head. I could tell he was angry with me. I had been a fool, and I paid the price being so close to death. My neck was bruised and my pride was dented. I began to cry. He put his arms around my shoulders to comfort me. “I’m sorry for shouting but you frightened me. Your foolishness had me so worried there for a time. When I saw Trevor Darcy with his hands around your neck, I wanted to kill him and I would have if the police officer hadn’t got to him first.” I looked up at him with sad eyes. “We could have lost you, Sophie and what would I have done then?”