by J. A. Saare
He pulled my hand and guided me past a wide expanse of trees. He used his body to keep branches and limbs off me, sheltering my face with his unyielding broad shoulders. Snow flickered from each branch we brushed, causing the flakes to fall all around us. We passed through and I could hear rushing water.
The creek was thin but impossible to cross without getting wet, and it winded up and around the property. I couldn’t jump it, but Caleb could. We approached the stream and I pulled off my glove. The thick currents rushing through the shining water were crystal clear, allowing me to see the multicolored stones beneath. I dipped my fingers inside and gasped at the icy bite of the water. It felt amazing, so incredibly cold, yet so impossibly clean.
Caleb knelt beside me, cupped his hand, and brought some of the water to his lips. I mimicked him, tasting the natural water as he did.
“Not bad,” I told him.
“Not bad,” he agreed.
I stood and shook my hand to remove traces of the remaining wetness. My fingers were numb, turning slightly blue. I put my hand inside my coat and tried to remove the stiffness before I replaced the glove.
Caleb walked over, unzipping his jacket. He reached for my hand and placed it between us as he pulled me close. His body radiated heat like a furnace, warm and balmy. I sighed, leaning in. It was if we were standing back in sunny Rhea County Tennessee. In moments, I wasn’t cold at all, completely snug and content.
“My own outdoor heater.” I sighed and he chuckled, brushing his hands gently along my back. “It must be nice to stay so warm.”
“It’s a perk,” he admitted uncomfortably, aware of where I was going with the conversation.
“Have you thought anymore about what we discussed?” I could feel his body tense and his hands stopped moving. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close.
“I have.” He hesitated before he continued, “I want you to be sure. Once done, it can’t be undone.”
“I know,” I said evenly, moving slightly away to look up at him.
His face was a mask of uncertainty. He wanted me to remain with him, but he battled his own personal demons. He still held on to a far away memory of his own flashing teeth as he lunged at his mother, bit her hand, and changed her life forever.
“This time will be different, it’s not the same.” I touched his face and skimmed my bare fingers along his cheek. “I want to be with you, Caleb. I want this with you.”
“The outcome is the same.” He took in a shaky breath. “Mom didn’t have an easy shift. This isn’t some romantic thing that you see in movies or read about in books.”
“Your mother was almost forty when it happened. Sarah said the natural change occurs when you’re younger because your body can adapt better. I’m young. I’ll be fine.”
“She could have died,” he snapped, eyes shifting color, but didn’t pull away.
“How many people that have been bitten die?” I reminded him softly, aware of the answer. While he hated sharing knowledge, Sarah didn’t.
“Not many,” he confessed, remaining anxious. “Still, it’s a difficult transition. It’s painful, Emma. Completely damned brutal. Especially for those who don’t carry the genetic trait. They shift much slower. It’s not natural for them. It won’t be natural for you.”
“I understand. But if we’re going to be together, we need to make decisions, including this one.” I gazed up at him, wanting him to see the resolve in my eyes. “If you want me to remain as I am, at least for a while, I’m open to it. Eventually we’ll have to make a choice, and we still have to discuss our future...” I allowed my words to drift, unable to finish. This wasn’t our first foray into the topic of family.
“You know I want children, I’ve never denied it. But we have plenty of time for that, and if it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen.” He tried to sound at peace with the possibility, but I knew he wasn’t. He was a born nurturer and protector and would be a perfect father.
“You’re right, we have time.” I tried to take the conversation to a better place. We were together, and that was the most important thing. I pressed against him, enjoying our time together, and pushed everything else aside for later.
****
Caleb was an amazing cook, something I discovered months ago. He knew how to time things perfectly, how to season things just right, and how to leave things alone until they needed tending. I watched him maneuver efficiently around the kitchen, stirring and chopping away. He promised to make beef stew, which he swore was the best thing to keep the chill away.
“Who taught you how to cook, anyway?” I sat with elbows on the counter, palms bracing my chin as my head swiveled back and forth.
“My mother.” He smiled and then shook his head, chuckling. “She tried to interest Sammie, but it never took.” He tossed seasoning inside the pot and stirred. Then he closed the lid, wiped his hands on a rag near the sink, and strode over. “That does it. We just have to leave it alone until it’s finished.”
“What were you like in high school, Caleb?” I arched an eyebrow at him curiously. I’d seen the pictures inside the Blackney living room. He played football, I knew that much.
“What was I like in school?” He laughed at the question and leaned across the counter. “That was a long time ago. I’d have to think about it.” He reflected for a moment. “I played football and ran with the wrong crowd every night.”
“You mean Derek?”
“Yes, I mean Derek. When he shifted, he became an animal, always starting shit with someone. I didn’t understand it then, but I tried to. Now it all makes sense.” He lifted his own eyebrow mockingly, gazing at me playfully. “Your turn.”
“Me?” I grimaced. “I don’t have anything but a decent GPA to brag about. I wasn’t very popular. I kept to myself mostly.”
He walked around the white counter, a rakish grin spreading across his face. “What about that temper of yours? Any cat fights you want to tell me about?”
“Nope.” I shook my head, making sure the “p” in nope popped with the motion of my mouth, and smiled as he approached.
I swiveled on the stool and he placed himself between my legs, hands on each side of my face. His breath was soft against my lips, his eyes intent on mine.
“I love you,” he whispered, lowered his head and kissed me softly. His mouth was gentle—pressing, lifting, returning.
“I love you,” I echoed, voice raspy.
His mouth opened as his deliciously warm and wet tongue delved inside and tempted me. He turned his head, doing the same thing from another angle. I felt myself begin to tremble as the smells of wood and pine, cedar and oak, earth and grass, lined my nose. It incapacitated me, and I moaned, latching onto the hands holding my face. I ran my hands past his wrists and threaded my fingers into his soft dark hair.
He released my face and wrapped his hands around my waist. Lifting me up and onto the counter, he brought our faces level. He pushed his hips between my legs and pulled me forward. His other hand came up, grasping my neck, and drew me to him. My hair cascaded around us, covering our shoulders in dark waves. His mouth left mine and went to my neck. His tongue left a wet path up to my ear. His ragged breaths along my skin tickled and I pulled him tighter to me. Turning my own face into his neck, I kissed his warm and tender skin.
His lips pressed into mine. His mouth was forceful, demanding I open to him. I did, just to taste him. He was delicious, warm, clean, and salty. He growled, lifting me up with his hands. His fingers raked into my thighs as he carried me easily from the counter. I wrapped my legs around his waist and snaked my hands around his neck to maintain my balance.
I relaxed against the softness of the couch as he lowered me with strong arms. Our bodies locked in place as he rested against me. Feeling him so close and heavy made the blood pound in my veins. I brushed my fingers down his arms and reached for his jeans. I pulled his shirt loose, ran my fingers along his sculpted abdomen and brought them to his back. The skin was smooth and soft,
so unbelievably warm.
He lifted away again and kissed my neck. His hands were gentle as they roamed over my body, starting at my hips and moving upward. He cupped my breasts, thumbs thrumming over the aching nipples shrouded by cotton and lace.
“I want you,” he whispered in my ear.
Breathless, I murmured, “I want you, too.”
Growling, he lifted his body and yanked his shirt over his head before tossing it carelessly against the darkened glass. His mouth returned to mine and he kissed me deeply. I returned each thrust of his tongue, my reservations swept away as raw feeling took over. Attempting to pull him closer, I raked my fingers into his shoulders.
His hands came to my shirt, gently tugging at the oversized sweater. I lifted my arms as he pulled the material free. Meeting his beautiful blue eyes, I shivered when I realized we were now skin-to-skin. He leaned forward to brush his mouth across my nose. I quivered slightly, feeling the heat of his bare flesh against the coolness of mine.
“We have all night, beautiful,” he said against my lips. “I want to take my time with you.”
I caressed his face, following the line of his jaw, and then pulled him close, lifting my lips to kiss him softly. I had wanted this for so long.
We were finally alone together.
Something important came rushing back. I panicked, pushing feebly against his chest. He looked at me with obvious confusion, eyebrows furrowed together.
“What’s wrong?”
“I couldn’t start taking the pill. You have to wait until a new cycle to start.”
“You’re fine.”
“You’re certain?”
“Built in birth control, remember?” He nodded and lowered his head again.
A loud piercing shriek resounded in the air, causing my heart stop momentarily. It repeated itself, over and over, bouncing off the high ceilings and back, ringing painfully in my ears.
“Shit!” Caleb snarled and jumped to his feet, hurrying into the kitchen.
Smoke billowed from the stove, permeating the entire area and causing the fire alarm to sound. I laughed, grabbed my sweater and thrust it over my head, as Caleb scurried back and forth between the sink and the stove.
“Can you open the back door?” he yelled.
I ran over and pulled the door open. The chilly wind blew inside and I moved back into the warmth of the cabin.
“Did your mom teach you about kitchen safety too?” I joked.
He ignored me, turned the stove off, and shook his head. The alarm finally stopped shrieking. He walked to the back door to close it and rubbed his ears briskly.
“I guess it’s pizza for dinner?” I laughed and he froze, staring at me from across the kitchen. His tanned skin was dark in the light, muscles taut under his skin, each valley and plane perfectly defined. His expression was unwavering and intense, focused on me. My smile vanished as something other than humor settled over me.
“I’m not hungry for food, are you?”
He continued staring, eyes traveling over my body. Then, he started walking to me slowly. His corded arm wrapped underneath my legs, lifting me as the other came around to support my back.
Placing my arms around his neck was all it took.
Caleb crossed the living room and carried me upstairs, striding purposefully into the bedroom. He sat me on the bed and flipped the switch on the lamp next to it. The area lit up, encasing us in a soft yellow glow.
He came across the bed on hands and knees, muscles shifting. I watched him approach, resting my weight on my elbows. His arms stopped on either side of my body and he reached around, encouraging me to sit up. He pulled the bulky sweater over my head once again and tossed it to the floor before kissing me. His mouth was softer this time. He pressed me back into the mattress, and his warm body settled against me.
“I’ve missed this.” He groaned, moving his hips in a rhythm I recalled only too well. “You have no idea how hard it’s been to keep my hands off you.”
“I know,” I whispered into his lips, grasping at his waist. “Me too.”
His hands fumbled at my jeans. He unbuckled the button and lowered the zipper before gently peeling them down. The smell of cedar and pine mingled with the warmth of his mouth, keeping my focus entirely on him. He ran his lips along my neck and past my ear as his hand reached behind my shoulder to unclasp my bra. He leaned up to study me as he pulled the thin material away, his eyes moving over my breasts before resting on my face.
“You’re so beautiful.”
He reached down to remove his jeans and I sat up, suddenly brave and determined. The crinkle in his forehead as he frowned, obviously puzzled when I pushed his hands away, caused me to giggle. His large body went still when he realized my intent, muscles quivering in anticipation.
“You have the softest touch,” he rasped in a throaty growl. Trapping my hair in his hands, he tucked it behind my back.
The buttons along the front of his jeans gave me trouble, and Caleb released my hair to open them with a deft flick of his wrist. A trail of dark hair made a path from his belly button down, and I reached out, touching the soft thatch just above his boxers. The muscles in his abdomen flexed and the hands on my back went motionless.
“Stand up for a minute,” I murmured.
I tried to pull them down without his help but my hands were trembling. Together we removed the last of his clothing, until he stood entirely naked before me. His chest was smooth and hairless, missing the silky hair that adorned his arms, legs, and stomach. I touched his bare skin first, awestruck by the contrast of my pale skin against his darkened tan. Leaning across the mattress on my knees, I started placing kisses on his chest.
As I moved down his body, Caleb remained motionless, chest heaving ever so slightly. His erection was enormous and appeared painful, the dark blue veins along the shaft engorged and pronounced; the large head wide and prominent.
“I want to touch you.” My voice was not entirely my own, going husky and deep.
He grasped my hand and guided it to him, hissing when my fingers wrapped skin as soft as silk. The velvety flesh was slightly slick and very warm, hotter than Caleb’s usual balmy temperature.
“You can do anything you want to me.” He allowed his hand fall to his side and gave me control.
The first few strokes were experimental, my loose fingers moving lightly across the skin. When Caleb’s hips began to move, I mirrored the smooth thrusts, mesmerized by the muscles in his thighs and abdomen that contracted. My thumb rotated over the thin slit at the tip, revolving in a slow circle.
Bending at the waist, I lowered my head to taste him. It was something I’d dreamed about. Something I’d regretted forgoing our first time together.
“Damn it,” he cursed suddenly and gripped my wrist. I peered up at him, worried I’d done something wrong. He bent to kiss me and said, “I’m sorry. I want you too badly. If you don’t stop, I won’t last.”
He released my wrist and grasped my waist with strong hands, urging me onto my back against the pillows. Our lips met and parted, tongues touching eagerly. His scent and dominating presence was overpowering, reminding me of just how dangerous he was capable of being. Yet the hands that drifted to my panties were unfailingly tender, his fingers brushing softly against the tingling skin.
“Do you remember how it felt when I tasted you?” He slipped the thin strip of cotton from my legs and nuzzled my inner thigh. My eyes widened as the memory surfaced and I nodded slowly, cheeks burning. He moved between my thighs, broad shoulders pressing my legs apart and out. Then he instructed, “Relax, beautiful. I’ve been waiting weeks for this.”
The heat of his mouth started at my knees and slowly moved upward. I shivered when I felt his warm breath caress the outside of my sex, groaning in anticipation of what was to come. Then his tongue licked in a firm decisive stroke as his steady hands cupped my bottom and lifted me to meet his mouth. I cried out and shuddered.
The familiar and enticing scent of forest an
d pine engulfed me, and I whimpered with need, undulating madly beneath him. The memories didn’t compare with the rightness of being with the one person I loved more than anything. Caleb wasn’t as easy or as patient as I remembered, tonguing me so deliberately that an orgasm arrived the moment he slid two fingers deeply inside my body, latched onto the swollen nub at the top of my sex, and sent me into wave after wave of pure unadulterated bliss.
“Caleb!” I screamed, unable to deny the pleasure he gave me. Each thrust of his fingers extended the ecstasy, until I thought I couldn’t take more.
Tanned shoulders and a dark head appeared as the last spasms tore through muscles, breaking through the pleasure, and I reached for him blindly. He guided the large bulbed tip of his erection to the slickness created by his mouth and my arousal, sliding the head up and down, and inched effortlessly within. He moved into me slowly, taking his time and groaning as the head of his length made solid contact with the softness of my womb.
The realization that we were finally together once more, united as mates, created warm tears that pooled in my eyes. Once upon a time, I thought I would never feel his touch or the weight of his body as he surrounded me like a second skin.
“Emma? What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”
Shaking my head and closing my eyes, I cleared my throat and hoped my voice didn’t break. “It’s just been so long, too long, and I...”
“Look at me.” The hands that held my hips were possessive, holding me in place. When I met Caleb’s gaze his irises were a vivid ice blue.
“I’ll never leave you again.” His voice was a heady growl that matched his stare. “Never.”
I used the hands latched around his neck to lift myself. Arching my back and pressing my breasts against his chest, I claimed his lips. I could taste myself on his tongue, as well as his own unique flavor. It was beyond erotic, reminding me that we were only whole when together. He slid free of my body and returned with a smooth, decisive stroke, burying himself so deeply my body quaked.
“I’ve missed you like this,” he said thickly, thrusting all the while. “Ready for me, wanting me as much as I want you.”
