by Kelly Oram
I buried my head in my arms on top of my desk and after only a couple minutes I started bouncing my knee restlessly. The nervous energy that made me walk to school was back.
When the bell rang I heard someone sit down in the desk in front of mine. Conor Fairchild spun around to face me. “Happy birthday!” he said, playfully snapping the party hat that was still on my head.
I pulled my head out of my arms to smile at him. “Thanks Conor.”
“You don’t look so good,” he replied with a frown. “Are you feeling okay? Do you want me to take you to the nurse?”
“I’m fine!” I snapped.
I instantly regretted yelling when Conor blanched. Conor is a really sweet guy who’s always been very nice to me. I don’t really have any friends besides Russ—I’ve never really needed any—but of all the other kids in town Conor is the only other person who’s ever made an effort to get to know me at all.
I couldn’t help but think if I really was so addicted to my best friend that it was physically painful to be apart from him, then it might actually be healthy to make some new friends that weren’t him.
“Conor, wait,” I said with a sigh. “I’m just—you’re right. I’m not really feeling like myself today. But it’s okay. I’ll be fine. I don’t need to go to the nurse.”
“If you’re sure.” Conor relaxed after my mood lightened. “So what’s Russ got planned for D-day this year, a parade down Main Street? The Skydiving Elvises spelling out ‘Happy Birthday Dani’ from ten thousand feet?”
I threw my head back into my arms with a groan. “How about we not talk about Russ today?”
I heard a gasp and then felt a hand come down softly on my shoulder. “I hope you guys didn’t break up?” Conor said. He sounded shocked and worried for me.
I sat up startled. “Break up?” I asked. “You have to be together in order to break up.”
I’d never seen someone look more confused than Conor in that moment. “But—but—aren’t you two? I mean, you and Russ…”
I shook my head. “We’re just friends.”
Conor glanced across the room with wide eyes and his mouth hanging open. I followed his gaze to where Russ was busy doodling on his notebook. Whatever he was drawing, he was concentrating on it really hard.
After that, our teacher Mr. Franks called us to attention. He explained the day’s activities and told us we needed to partner up so Conor spun around again.
“Partners?” I asked.
He answered me by saying, “Are you and Russ really just friends?”
I had to smile. I think it was the first time I’d smiled all morning. “Yes, really,” I said. “That’s all we’ve ever been.”
“You’ve never been a couple?”
I shook my head and Conor let out this incredulous laugh. “You mean I could have asked you out this whole time?”
“What?” I gasped.
Conor blushed a deep red. I think he’d been so shocked by the news of my non-relationship that he’d spoken without thinking.
“Sorry,” he said. He looked embarrassed but determined as well. “I always assumed you and Russ were together. Actually, I think everyone assumes it.”
I tried not to scowl. “Yeah, well, we’re not. And we never have been. It’s just not like that between us.”
I glanced back at Russ again. He was ignoring his partner and still doodling on his notebook. He was pushing his pencil so hard that it snapped in half. His eyes flicked over to me and I blushed, feeling self-conscious of the conversation I was having with Conor. I couldn’t help but wonder what Russ would think if he could hear us.
Conor’s voice snapped me from my daze. “So if you and Russ aren’t together, then does that mean you don’t have a date to the Homecoming dance tonight?”
I was so surprised by the question that I couldn’t say anything. I could only manage to shake my head.
“In that case, I know it’s really last minute, but I don’t have a date either and I’d love to take you. Or, there are a few of us who were planning to go stag if you’d rather do that. If you don’t already have plans, I mean. You could join us.”
The thought of going to the dance with Conor—or anyone besides Russ, really—was so strange. But wasn’t that what I needed to be doing? I mean I was currently a sad sack. I had to get over my feelings for Russ fast. This seemed like the best way to do that. I thought about it for a second and then nodded. “Thank you, Conor. I’d love to go to the dance with you.”
Conor frowned. “Really? You’ll seriously go to Homecoming with me tonight?”
“Sure. Why not? I don’t have any other plans.”
Conor gaped at me and muttered, “I can’t believe that just happened.”
The look of disbelief on his face was so funny I laughed loud enough to get Mr. Franks’ attention. “Dani. Conor. More work. Less socializing.”
“Sorry Mr. Franks,” Conor said still bewildered. “Did you know that Dani and Russ aren’t a couple?”
Everybody in the room, even Mr. Franks, stopped what they were doing in order to stare at us. Conor was right. Everyone did assume Russ and I were together. I’d never seen a more stunned crowd of people.
“Is that true?” someone asked.
I shrugged, trying not to blush and trying even harder not to look Russ’s direction. Russ didn’t confirm it either, but Conor nodded, still in complete shock. “She just said she’d go with me to Homecoming.”
I heard a few snickers. Someone muttered that I’d taken a major step down while someone else actually said if I wanted to have a good time I should ditch the geek and go with him.
Brad laughed the loudest and said “Isn’t your mommy gonna be heartbroken that she can’t be your date now?” to Conor, making the entire class erupt with laughter.
I resisted the urge to crawl under my desk because for one, Russ was already going to give me so much crap about this and letting him know I was embarrassed right now would only make it worse. And two, Conor looked completely crestfallen and it pissed me off. “Just ignore them Conor,” I said louder than necessary. “I’m excited to go with you and that’s all that matters.”
Conor looked even more shocked than he had when I’d said yes in the first place, but he managed to sit up a little straighter in his chair.
“Thank you for that fascinating bit of gossip Conor,” Mr. Franks said getting the class back under control. “But please get back to work. Anyone who doesn’t finish by the end of class will finish in detention this afternoon.”
. . . . .
Conor and I were both still in our seats after class when Russ came up to us. I had no idea what Russ was thinking and had to swallow the nerves in my stomach. Conor and I both stood—Conor looking even more nervous than me—but I stood much too quickly. Whether it was my nerves or the bug that had been bothering me lately, my head spun.
Both Conor and Russ reached for me. I didn’t see the look that transpired between the two of them but Conor backed off almost instantly and Russ was the one to put his arm around me. I shivered and had to fight off the urge to lean against him.
“This is stupid Dani,” Russ grumbled. “You shouldn’t be here. I’m going to call your mom and make her come get you.”
“I told you, I’m okay.”
“You’re shaking,” Conor argued. “Look, Dani, if you’re really sick then Russ is right. You should go home. Don’t worry about the dance. I’ll understand if you can’t go.”
“Conor would you stop trying to talk me out of going? I want to go with you. It will be fun. I promise I’m all right. I just didn’t eat breakfast this morning. After lunch I’ll be as good as new.”
“Okay.” He glanced nervously at Russ before adding, “If you’re sure it’s all right.”
I couldn’t help sneaking a peak at Russ too, because his grip on my shoulder tightened a little when I’d brought up the dance. He flashed Conor a wide smile that only I could tell was fake. “You guys will have a great time toget
her,” he said. “Watch out for her mom though.” He dropped his voice to a stage whisper. “She’s insane about pictures. You’ll be there forever.”
Russ proceeded to twirl his finger in circles beside his head, suggesting that my mother was crazy. I elbowed him like I was insulted, but really I was just relieved he’d managed to break the tension.
“Okay. I’ll pick you up at seven then.” Conor gave me one last tentative smile and then scampered off before Russ changed his mind.
As soon as he was gone Russ frowned at me. “If you wanted to go to the dance you could have said something.”
I let him guide me into the hallway and shrugged as we made our way to our second period class. “I hadn’t even thought about it,” I said. “It just sort of came up and he asked, so...”
“And you’re really going to go?”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
Russ let out a hard breath like he was resisting yelling at me. When he had himself under control he said, “How about the fact that there’s obviously something very wrong with you?”
“Gee thanks.”
“You know what I mean. Do you even care about the fact that you’ve almost passed out twice today?”
Russ removed his arm from around my shoulder and, I swear, it was like my body was attached to him by invisible strings. I automatically leaned against him—closing the space between us again.
“Hey,” he said, trying to juggle the unexpected weight of my limp body. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
When his arm came around me again the last of my nerves disappeared. I felt so relieved that I slumped all my weight against him and let out a long sigh.
“Dani?” I heard the fear creeping into his voice. “Seriously, what’s wrong with you?”
I couldn’t help sighing again. “Nothing. I’ve been sick, but I’m already feeling better.” It was the truth. It was as if the energy Russ was giving off was exactly what my body needed.
Without thinking, I slipped my arms around his waist. He felt so good that I had to smash myself against him. I couldn’t even stop to think about the fact that this hug was nothing like any we’ve ever shared before—that there was nothing best-friendsy about it. I was being intoxicated by his presence, and I literally lost control for a minute.
I pushed myself onto my tiptoes so that I could bury my face in the crook of his neck because I needed to feel his skin against mine. When I pressed my lips to him, though, it startled him so badly that he sucked in a breath and his entire body went stiff beneath me. It was enough to finally break me from my trance, but not enough to make me pull myself away from him.
Russ was going to have to break our connection, but he didn’t look like he could any more than me. He was shaking slightly, his breathing was ragged, and his eyes were full of something I’d never seen before—a fire that made me shiver all over again.
Before I could work up the courage to ask him what he was thinking, he shook himself from his daze and slowly peeled me off of him. “Careful.” His voice oozed with forced friendliness. “Wouldn’t want to give your new boyfriend the wrong impression about us.”
That made me snap out of it. I gasped, horrified by my actions. “I’m sorry! I—I don’t know what’s wrong with me. You’re right. I’m really not feeling well. I—I think I should go home.”
I spun around to bolt for the nurse’s office, praying he’d just let me go and not question my momentary lapse in sanity. No such luck.
Russ grabbed hold of my wrist, sending more of that warm energy through me. I needed to get out of there before I jumped him right here in the hallway and crossed a lot more than just a friendship boundary.
“Dani.”
He was going to call me on it. He was really going to make us have this conversation right here in the middle of school.
“Russ, please.” I tugged my arm but he didn’t release me. “I just need to get home.”
“Okay. I’ll take you.”
Oh, right. So he could grill me the second we were alone in his car? “That’s okay. I have to go to the nurse anyway. She’ll call my mom. You’d better get to class. Mrs. Dillinger hates it when you’re late.”
He must have sensed my panic since he let me go. “Fine. But I’ll come by and check on you later.”
An hour before the dance I sat in my kitchen wearing an antique dress my mom found in the Historical Society storage that was from the early nineteen hundreds. It was nothing like what the other girls would be wearing tonight—old fashioned and covered with lace. But it made me feel like a princess and I was surprisingly bummed that I wasn’t going to get the chance to wear it.
It was obvious now that I wouldn’t be going on my date. I’d come home hoping to rest it off but so far I only felt worse. This was the strangest illness I’d ever had. I didn’t feel sick other than being tired, but I was also completely restless again. That hollow feeling was back and I felt so empty inside that it hurt.
I picked up the phone for the third time, wondering how I was going to break the news to Conor, and was very thankful for the knock at the door that let me put off the phone call a few minutes longer.
I stopped a foot from the front door wondering if I was losing my mind because I swear I could feel Russ on the other side of it, and I kid you not just knowing he was there was making me feel better. Forget my parents’ flu theory. This was a mental illness. Clearly I was crazy.
Realizing that I was so hopelessly, psychotically addicted to Russ didn’t put me in the best mood. I contemplated going back to bed, but Russ didn’t wait for me to answer the door before he barged in.
“What do you want?” I grumbled.
Russ held up a DVD and a can of chicken noodle soup. “I came to nurse you back to health.” He grinned from ear to ear until he noticed what I was wearing. Then he scowled. “I can’t believe you think you’re really going to the dance tonight.”
The overprotective bit was really getting on my nerves. “Actually, I’m not.”
“Good.”
“Thanks for the sympathy.”
Russ shrugged with an arrogance that only he could pull off. “Kind of hard to be sympathetic about you not going on a date with Conor.”
“What’s your problem?”
“My problem?” Russ yelled with so much force that it startled me. “What the hell is your problem? Why would you go out with Conor Fairchild?”
“Why not?”
Russ was having trouble putting his disgust into words, but it showed on his face easily enough. “Because! Conor is—is—he’s a geek! A sniveling little momma’s boy!”
I couldn’t believe he’d just said that. “He’s sweet,” I said indigently. “And smart, and funny.”
“He’s not good enough for you.”
“Who crowned you my big brother?”
“You can do so much better than him Dani.”
“Can I?” I asked. “I’m sixteen years old and this was the first time I’ve ever been asked out. By anyone. Ever.”
Russ flinched and I was mad enough that I enjoyed seeing it. “Not all of us are as good-looking and charming as you,” I said, being brutal. “Not all of us have the luxury of being so stuck up.”
“Dani, stop.”
“No, you stop! I don’t even know why you care!”
“Of course I care!”
I couldn’t help but hope that my instincts were right. Russ was sure acting like a jealous boyfriend right now. I couldn’t have imagined the signals last night.
“If you’re so concerned about it then tell me, Russ, who exactly, if not Conor, should I be dating?”
Russ glared at me but he kept his mouth shut.
“That’s what I thought.” I picked up the can of soup and thrust it back at him. “Take your Campbell’s and go home.”
I couldn’t believe it, but Russ actually started to leave.
“Coward,” I muttered when he stalked out the door.
Russ turned around and barged right back ins
ide to glare at me some more. He stood there for a minute and after releasing a long breath said, “I can’t do this anymore.”
He grabbed me by the wrist and dragged me out of the house with him. I wanted to pull away but it felt too good to be touching him so instead I let him pull me out to his car. “Where are we going?” I asked, so confused and curious that my anger was completely gone.
Russ, however, was still pissed and didn’t say a single word as he drove me back to Brad Halloway’s house.
I had absolutely no clue what he was up to and he didn’t explain. He simply dragged me back to the pool and shouted something in some weird foreign language as he flung his hands out.
I watched in disbelief as the Jell-O in the pool vanished and pristine crystal blue water took its place like it’d never seen a single granule of gelatin.
When Russ finally turned to face me he pointed at himself with a grim expression. “Warlock. Not coward.”
I stumbled backward more shocked than I’d ever been in my life. I looked at Russ, then back at the pool, then back at Russ again and that was it—my knees buckled and the lights went out.
. . . . .
I opened my eyes to find I was lying on the pool deck while Russ was snapping his fingers in my face. When he saw that I was conscious again he said, “I imagined a lot of different reactions to me finally telling you the truth, but passing out wasn’t one of them. Way to be unpredictable.”
The smile left Russ’s face when I pulled myself up and scrambled away from him. “Okay, look, you don’t have to freak out,” he said quickly.
“That wasn’t possible!” I pointed at the pool that was still filled with plain old water. I felt bile rise in my throat. “That’s not possible!” I yelled again. “Magic isn’t real!”
“Dani, calm down.” Russ slowly reached out to take my hand.
“Stay back!” I gasped and stepped further away from his touch. I could see that my panicking was hurting Russ but I couldn’t help it. I mean the guy just transformed a pool full of red Jell-O back into water! “What are you? Are you even human?”
