The Promise: A Secret Baby Romance (North Woods Universtiy Book 5)

by J. L. Beck

  They’ll disown you if you’re not a virgin.

  Chest heaving, I drop my gaze to the button on his jeans and reach for it with trembling hands. You can do this. It can’t be that hard. I’ve merely flicked the button on his jeans open when his hands come out of nowhere, circling my wrists. They’re rough, warm, and strong, so strong. It hits me then that he’s halting my motions. Oh no. This is where he tells me no. Where he pushes me away. Maybe he’s realized I lied about my age. Maybe I’m too young for him? I’m only eighteen.

  I have one chance at this, one singular chance, and it’s about to slip away.

  “That’s not part of the deal. You don’t have to…” I look up at him, noting the sharp angles of his face, his clenched jaw, how dark his eyes seem to have gotten in a matter of seconds. He looks angry. Did I anger him? Make a mistake in believing that maybe he wants me?

  “Don’t you want me?” I whisper, trying my best not to sound as rejected and hurt as I feel. I’m so far out of my element, I might as well be on another planet. Maybe I’ve done something wrong.

  “I mean… yeah, of course, I want you. You’re a beautiful woman, but you… I don’t want you to think that you have to do this for a place to sleep or food. I’m not like that.” His green eyes soften, and the honesty in them tells me everything I need to know.

  He’s a good person, kind, and the perfect man for this job.

  “I know. I want you though.” I force the words past my lips, realizing how true they are. I really do want him. Want him to be my first.

  “Are you sure? I promise you don’t have to do this. You can stay here, regardless. I’m asking for nothing in return.”

  “I really want you,” I admit shamelessly. My parents would lose it if they could see me right now. If they knew how much I do want this, how sinful my mind is.

  I’ve always known I was different from the rest of my family. The black sheep, even at a young age. Always testing boundaries, always rebelling, never following rules, and now I’m breaking one of the holiest customs. I’m giving away my virginity to a man I’m not married to, one I’ve known only a matter of minutes.

  “If you’re sure this is what you want?” Lex’s voice grows deeper, reaching a spot inside of me that makes me shiver.

  Wanting to show him rather than use words, I shove my skirt down my legs and tug my shirt off over my head. I do my best not to feel embarrassed over my plain cotton panties and bra and instead reach for his jeans, tugging the zipper down. My hands are shaking, and I swallow thickly when he reaches up and brushes the hair at my neck away. Leaning forward, he peppers kisses along my skin, and it’s like my entire body is being lit on fire.

  His lips feel so good on my skin, his fingers dig into the flesh at my hips as he tugs me forward, and I feel the hard ridge of his manhood resting against my belly. I’m consumed with a need to get this done, and so I push his jeans down his hips. At the same time, he pushes the straps of my bra down over my shoulders before tugging the cups down, exposing my breasts to the cool air.

  My nipples are hardened, sensitive, and I gasp when his wet mouth moves down my shoulder, closing around one of the tight peaks.

  Pleasure ignites deep in my core, and I move my hands to his head, holding him in place, wanting him to continue. His tongue laps at my nipple before he switches to the other, eliciting a gasp out of me. My face feels as if it’s on fire, a wetness forming against my panties.

  I want more, need more. I need to seal the deal before he changes his mind. Tracing a hand down his body, I’m mesmerized by the dips and hard plains. He’s fit and firm, and strangely, I feel safe with him.

  When my fingers graze over his length, he pulls back, his emerald gaze colliding with mine. A groan pushes past his lips, and he pulls away just enough to tug his shirt off and pull his pants down. Then he’s on me. Wrapping his hands around the back of my thighs, he lifts me and hauls me against his chest like I weigh nothing.

  I grip onto his shoulder and watch with amazement as he moves us into another room with a nice comfy looking bed.

  “You should be fucked in a bed, not on the couch, or against the wall,” he whispers against my ear. A lump forms in my throat at the words, and a sliver of fear settles deep in my gut. This is going to hurt, I know it is. I’ve heard the stories from the other women in our family.

  Dropping me onto the mattress, he climbs onto the bed beside me. Drinking me in, I feel his eyes on every inch of my skin. Exposed and vulnerable, I contemplate lifting my arms to cover myself, but know I would be giving him the wrong idea if I did.

  Pushing the fear away, I circle my arms around his neck and tug him closer. His hardness brushes against my panties, and I’m eager to get this done. Spreading my legs wide so he can fit between them, I kiss him hard. He gives back to me with the same intensity, and after we kiss for a bit, I move my hands down to his boxers.

  Pulling away, he shakes his head. “I’m going to finger you first.”

  My brow furrows, I’ve never heard of such a thing, but I don’t want him to stop or rethink, so I nod my head and rest back against the mattress, letting him do as he pleases. Grabbing my panties, he slowly pulls them down my hips. I bite the inside of my cheek until I taste the coppery tang of blood.

  Don’t show how nervous you are.

  His fingers slowly trail down my body, his hand disappearing between my legs. I’m self-conscious, wondering what he plans to do. Is he going to inspect me, or just touch me? As soon as his fingers rub against the small bundle of nerves hidden between my lips, I whimper. He grins down at me, and I decide that smile is something I’ll remember for the rest of my life.

  “You’re soaked, so wet for me. Fuck. I want to taste you. Lick you, finger you, and then fuck you with my cock.”

  “Yes,” I gasp as he moves his fingers faster and faster. I’m so caught up in the pleasure he’s giving me that I don’t notice what he’s doing next until he’s easing a finger inside me. There’s a sting of pain and uncomfortableness that follows, but after that, I feel nothing but pleasure.

  He moves inside me with a tenderness that is frightening, almost as if he knows that I’m inexperienced and cautious.

  “You’re so beautiful, so pure and perfect. Come for me, come on my hand,” he whispers the crude words into my ear, his teeth nipping the lobe, and I couldn’t stop myself from being overtaken by the heat in my belly.

  It spreads outward, overtaking my limbs and mind. My eyes fall closed, and all I can hear is the rush of blood in my ears. I’m aware that Lex is moving above me, and when I’m one with my body again, I open my eyes to find he’s ditched his boxers.

  I allow myself to look down at his length and almost gasp. He’s thick and huge, and this is not going to work, not at all. I don’t know why I thought this was a good idea.

  Taking his length into his hand, he strokes himself a few times before lining himself up with my entrance. I clamp up, wondering if I can move forward.

  “Jude, baby, you still with me, you still want this?”

  I nod without thought. Even as afraid as I am, this has to happen. I have to give myself to this man because it’s him, or a life of hell under my father’s rule.

  Hitching my leg up and over his hip, he prods my entrance once more. His body is shaking, coiled with tension as he hovers above me. Our gazes collide, and then in one swift movement, he pushes inside of me. The air rips from my lungs, and the pain between my legs explodes outward.

  I squeeze my eyes shut to stop the tears from coming.

  He’s just saved me, and he doesn’t even realize it.

  LEX

  I could tell she was inexperienced, but now that I’m inside of her, I’m starting to believe she’s much more than that.

  Did she just give me her virginity? Fuck, I hope not. Her eyes open once more, and I can see they’re glassy, almost as if she was near tears. Damn it. I can’t feel anything or see beyond the pleasure pulsing through my body.

  She feels so
perfect, small, soft, her pussy strangling my dick almost painfully. I want to ask her, but I’m so overcome by pleasure, the words are lodged deep in my throat.

  A sheen of sweat covers my forehead, and my muscles tighten from the amount of effort it takes not to move right away. I want to let her adjust to my size first even though all I want to do is pull out just so I can slam right back inside of her.

  Lifting her hips, I sink a little deeper inside of her as her legs wrap around me, and her heels dig into my lower back. “Please,” she whimpers near the shell of my ear. “Please, move. It feels so good.”

  I didn’t think it was possible, but my cock gets even harder. Her softly spoken words drawing the last bit of blood from my brain and redirecting it straight to my groin.

  “You’re so tight,” I groan, making a fist against the mattress.

  Pulling out a fraction, I ease back in, moving slowly, and giving her time to adjust while sinking a little deeper into the tightness of her channel. I’ve had sex many times, made love, and fucked, but nothing has ever felt like this.

  “Please,” Jude whimpers as if she’s in pain—as if me moving slowly is causing her more harm than good.

  “You want me to fuck you?” I grit out through my teeth. I feel myself slipping, my control being tugged right out from under me. Rocking my hips against her, I test the ground a little more, moving faster and faster.

  Her delicate throat bobs, apprehension riddling her angelic features before she nods. “Yes, take me.”

  Giving in to my most basic needs, I pull out to the tip before pushing back inside her warm channel. That one fluid thrust causes everything to slip away. I move with agility and carnal need, rutting into her over and over again, trying to find something inside her, something I’m not even sure what.

  Head tipped back into the pillows, her nails sink into my flesh with each hard stroke I give her. She’s so fucking tiny and fragile. I don’t want to hurt her, but my need to take from her until there is nothing left is all-consuming.

  “Lex,” she whimpers as I drive into her, the bed squeaking as I do. My chest is heaving, and sweat drips down my body.

  “Yeah, baby…” I grunt.

  “I need…” She gasps as I hit deep inside of her. “More…” I can tell she isn’t sure what she’s asking for just that she needs that little bit that’s going to push her over the edge, so I balance on one arm and continue fucking her hard and fast while bringing a hand between our joined bodies. My fingers slide between her folds easily, and I rub fast circles against her clit, focusing my attention on her face, watching it morph into something more in a quick second.

  “That’s what you need?” I grit out, thrusting faster.

  Unable to form words, she nods, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip, leaving an indentation. Pleasure builds at the bottom of my spine, my balls are begging for release, and my muscles ache. But I continue working her over until her pussy flutters around my cock, tightening all around me, letting me know she’s gotten her release.

  Then I bury my face into the crook of her neck and fuck her hard and fast until the pressure in my balls becomes too much to bear. Thrusting one more time, I go off like an atomic bomb, releasing ropes of my sticky release inside of her.

  A heavy fog covers my brain, and I roll off of her a second before I collapse against her. Falling onto the mattress on the other side of her, I suck air into my heaving lungs. It’s been a long time since I felt something that intense before.

  Once I’ve caught my breath, I roll over to find Jude on her side, staring at me. She looks satiated and sleepy.

  “Are you okay?” I ask, my voice husky.

  “Yes, I’m great.” Her eyes pinch at the sides as she moves, and I know she has to be in pain. I want to apologize, but what good would that do? Do I tell her that I’ve never felt the need to fuck someone like I did her? Surely, that will send her running to the door. Still, I want to apologize for hurting her if I did.

  “I’m sorry if I… went too hard or fast.”

  “You didn’t. It was perfect.” She smiles, and the air in my chest evaporates. She’s so damn pure looking right now that I just want to wrap my arms around her and protect her from the rest of the world.

  “Are you… are you okay aside from that? Do you have somewhere to go?” I can’t believe I’m asking her if she’s homeless after fucking her.

  She reaches down and grabs the blanket tugging it up to her chest. “My family isn’t… They aren’t very nice. They have strict rules and stuff.”

  The vagueness of her answer has giant red flags waving in front of my eyes. “Are they hurting you?”

  She shakes her head, but there is an uncertainty in her eyes that tells me she’s lying. Reaching for her, I tug her into my body and brush a few strands of hair off her face. Her cheeks are red, and her lips are swollen. She smells like sex, and me, and it’s making my need to protect her a hundred times stronger.

  “I promise that if you need somewhere to go, someone to protect you, I’ll be that person. I’ve spent four years serving my country, protecting people is kind of my job. I’ll protect you if that’s what you need, I’ll keep you safe.”

  Jude’s blue eyes become misty, and she gives me a sad smile. “Promises were meant to be broken.”

  “Not mine. I keep my promises. Always.” I get the feeling she’s been let down a time or two in her life, and I want her to know that if she needs some type of safety, I’m here for her. I’ll catch her if she falls.

  Pulling her even closer, I hold her to me, showing her with my body that I’ve got her, that I’ll keep her safe. She takes my invitation, cuddling into me, burying her face into my chest. She sucks in a harsh breath and then melts into me.

  I try my best to fight against the exhaustion that’s overcoming me, wanting this moment to go on forever, but I’m only so strong with her in my arms. Letting my eyes fall closed, I fall asleep with her warm breath fanning against my skin and the soft, steady beat of her heart on my chest.

  JUDE

  My eyes blink open, and for one single second, the unfamiliar room has me in a panic, but as soon as I take in my surroundings, those feelings vanish into thin air.

  Warmth surrounds me, warmth and safety. Lex’s heavy arm is draped over me, holding me tightly to his chest like I belong to him. Oh, how I wish that were true.

  I wish I could stay here in his arms forever, but I know that’s just a dream. My family won’t stop looking for me if I don’t return. I need them to disown me first. I need to go back there so I can ultimately be free of them. I know they won’t let me go without retaliation.

  A crazy thought enters my mind then. Perhaps I could come back here? Maybe I could see Lex again. Just as quick as the thought enters my mind, I banish it away.

  Don’t be a fool, Jude.

  This was a one-time thing. Just sex and nothing more. His words from last night were just that… words. I can’t expect him to feel what I’m feeling. Plus, I’m pretty sure the only reason I’m feeling so drawn to him is the fact that he is the first man in my life who’s shown me kindness. The first man who treated me with respect, who saw me as an equal human being and not as less because I’m a woman.

  I’ll be forever grateful to him; for what he’s done for me without even knowing it. Quiet as a mouse, I slide out of bed and find my clothes on the floor. I wince, an ache throbbing between my legs as I dress.

  When I’m dressed, I take one last look at Lex. It’s almost completely dark, the only thing illuminating the room is the night sky that’s filtering in through the window.

  Even in the barely-there light, he looks magnificent, his bare chest on full display, rising and falling in an even rhythm, the sheet barely covering his nether region. It takes a lot of willpower to turn around and leave the room when all I want to do is crawl back into the bed to pretend the world around us doesn’t exist.

  On the way out, I spot a notepad on the coffee table and decide to leave him a little
message. Last night might not have been special to him, but I can’t leave without letting him know how much it meant to me.

  Grabbing the pen, I take a deep breath before writing down what I feel in my heart.

  Lex,

  Last night meant more to me than you will ever know.

  You gave me a gift.

  You gave me a choice.

  You gave me freedom.

  And for that, I will forever be grateful.

  Love, Jude

  I drop the pen and wipe the escaping tear from my eye before I head out. Closing the door behind me softly, I hope that one day I can find my way back here because I know…

  Part of me will always be his.

  1

  Lex

  Six Weeks Later

  I duck out of the way as Roman’s fist flies through the air, barely missing the side of my head. Unfortunately, I’m not fast enough to dodge his follow-up left jab. He hits me square in the jaw, making my head snap back. Bright lights flash before my eyes, reminding me of Jude’s platinum blonde hair.

  Fuck.

  Forgetting her has been harder than I thought it would be. I decided about a week ago that she wasn’t a one-night-stand. If she was, why would I feel so stupidly fucking heartbroken?

  “Lex, are we doing this, or are you off in la-la land?”

  “Shut up and stop hitting like a bitch.”

  Roman grins, and this time, I catch him off guard, slamming my fist into his side. I bounce back on my heels and snicker as he holds his side, but my amusement is forgotten when his fist catches me right on the nose. My nose throbs, and I feel the warmth of blood dripping down over my lips and chin.