Off Beat (Forgotten Flounders Series Book 1)

by J. C. Hannigan

  In the six minutes it took to drive home, Asher’s chin fell against his chest, gentle snores spilling from his lips. But despite having fallen asleep, he held fast to his new LEGO set on his lap and stirred when we pulled into the driveway. He walked himself in, carrying his new set carefully, and didn’t utter a word of resistance on the way up to bed. He brushed his teeth and got ready without complaint. He was so exhausted. Within moments of his head touching the pillow, he was asleep again.

  I stepped into the hallway, gently pulling his door closed behind me. Calum stood in front of me, his eyes searching mine, his lips pulling together in a sad smile. He always could detect when something was off. It didn’t matter if it didn’t pertain to him, or if it was an insignificant thing. He always took notice.

  Raina’s truth weighed heavy on my soul, but it really wasn’t my secret to tell. Calum was picking up on my internal conflict, compartmentalizing it, and analyzing my behaviour. Judging by his tortured eyes, he was probably assuming my internal infliction had everything to do with him.

  Drawing in a deep breath and taking his hand, I wordlessly led him to my room, closing the door quietly behind us. I flicked on the light, illuminating the room, and turned to him.

  Cal opened his lips, about to say something—but I brought my finger to them, silencing him. My gaze locked with his, and I didn’t blink as I spoke.

  “Yes—I’m keeping something from you. But only because it’s not my secret to tell. This person will tell you soon, I’m sure.”

  “Is this about Raina Parsons?” Calum asked, his brows furrowing as he studied me. I blinked. “Who is she?” I groaned, turning away from him. He let me distance myself, and I watched his reflection in the glass pane of my bedroom window. He was watching me too. “That name sounds familiar…it’s been nagging me since I heard it.” He frowned.

  “How so?” Now I was curious—curious enough to glance over my shoulder at him. He was staring at the carpet, frowning as he fought to recall something.

  After several minutes passed, he let out a dark chuckle and shook his head, crossing over to sit on my mattress. “That blasted blue trunk again.”

  “What?” I asked, confused.

  “My grandfather paid me one summer when I was fifteen to clean and declutter his attic, which was a boring job. I started rooting through his stuff, you know—finding cool old hats from the fifties and stuff like that—to make it more fun for myself. I found this chest up there, and it was my mother’s. It had her diary in it, from the year she met my dad. She’d been playing at a bar near his college, and he asked her out for drinks. It was kind of cool, reading how she fell for him. Then I read about how she found out he was dating a girl back home when they first met. Her name was Renee Parsons. He’d broken things off with her, but I guess she caused some issues.”

  “What kind of issues?”

  He shook his head, trying to recall. “Showing up at the bars my mom played at, getting wasted and booing, causing scenes, trying to sleep with my dad again…that kind of thing.”

  “Did he know? About Raina?”

  “That’s the million-dollar question,” he chuckled darkly, shaking his head a little and meeting my eyes with conviction. “He was so pissed about me for being irresponsible. It’s almost funny.”

  “Not really,” I frowned, thinking of the life Raina must have lived. How alone she must have felt—especially after losing Nik’s dad.

  “Funny might have been a poor word choice. Ironic? Either way.” Cal sighed, the sound of it heavy and burdened. I wanted to comfort him, but I kept my mouth shut, not knowing what to say or not say. He sensed my debate, watching me warily. “So…if Raina is my half-sister; why does she have a problem taking the money?”

  “She has her reasons, and I’m sure when she’s ready to talk to you about them, she will.” I gave him a look that said this conversation was over. It had to be—I didn’t have the answers he was looking for. He nodded, and I let him mull over my words for a moment before moving to stand between his legs. Sliding my hands along the back of his neck, my fingers toyed with his dark hair before I gently tugged it, drawing his head back.

  The air changed, the arousal in my eyes sparking with it, drawing forth Cal’s desires, too. His nostrils flared when I lowered my mouth to his and kissed him slowly. His hands gripped my thighs, the pads of his fingers digging in just enough to feel good.

  Calum

  I knew the tactic—and knew it well. Harper wanted to avoid answering my questions, and all she had to do to do that was touch me…and look at me with those wide brown fuck-me eyes. That’s all I needed to put a pin in it and spend the rest of the evening lost in the bliss that was between her thighs.

  But the morning had come, and with it—the thoughts, the wondering. I was too pissed off at my dad to face him, but there was someone else I could talk to about it. I slipped out of bed at four o’clock and dressed in the dark, peeking in on Asher before I went downstairs. He was still passed out cold, exhausted from the excitement of his party.

  I wanted to catch Raina before she opened the diner. I had questions that needed answering, and I couldn’t expect Harper to have them. I drove to town, parking a few spaces down from the diner.

  I sat in the Jeep for twenty-minutes before the door to the apartments above the convenience store opened, and Raina stepped out. She tugged her open jacket together and held it closed with her hand as she started walking down the street toward the diner.

  Opening the door, I stepped out. The sound caught her attention, and her body twisted around. She wasn’t expecting to see anybody downtown so early. Spotting me approach, she huffed out with aggravation. I couldn’t help but grin. The action reminding me of how Connor got when I bugged her too much—how I got, too.

  “Hello, sister.”

  My greeting caught her off guard, and her eyes narrowed warily. “She told you.” She said flatly.

  “Nope. I figured it out for myself. I’m pretty smart. Besides…you bear a striking resemblance to the Jacobs side.” I pointed out, shoving my hands in my pockets. It was still pretty cold for the end of April.

  Her eyes narrowed. “You’re going to make me late for work. What do you want?”

  Watching her, I could see the vulnerability she tried to mask beneath prickly layers of aggression. “I’ll take some of that sludgy coffee,” I replied, smiling.

  “Seriously?”

  “Five in the morning is the perfect time for sludgy coffee,” I replied honestly. “It’ll feel like I’m on the road again. Besides, I’d like to get to know my sister a little more.”

  She rolled her eyes, letting her jacket go to reach into her pocket and pull a set of keys and unlock the door. Her damn coat didn’t seem to have a working zipper. She didn’t even flinch at the cold air, although I felt it nipping at the exposed skin on the back of my neck.

  Once the door was unlocked, she stepped through it. I caught it before it slammed shut as she stomped over to the counter. She pulled out the filter for the coffee machine and put a new paper filter in it before grabbing a pre-packaged bag of coffee. Ripping it open, Raina dumped the contents inside the filter and shoved it back. She put a coffee pot under it and flicked the buttons on.

  She ignored me, disappearing into the back. I made myself comfortable on a stool at the counter and waited her out. The coffee started to brew, filling the empty diner with the deceivingly delicious scent of dark roast.

  Raina returned a few minutes later. Her coat tucked away somewhere in the back and a black apron over her uniform. She leaned against the back counter, eyeing me warily.

  “So…let’s start with the essentials. What’s your birthday?” I leaned back a little, assessing her—and the situation.

  “March 13th, 1992.” She replied stiffly.

  “March 3rd, 1992,” I said quietly. That would break my mother’s heart, I was sure of it—but that was my father’s cross to bear, not mine or Raina’s.

  “I know.” Her jaw ti
cked, and she looked away. “Guess mother dearest got a post-breakup romp in.”

  “You don’t speak very kindly of her.” I pointed out gently, noting the ice and hatred in her tone.

  “Yeah, well. My bedtime stories were about how my sperm donor had chosen the better family and wanted nothing to do with me.” Raina’s shoulder jerked up in a shrug, and she turned to grab two mugs off the shelf. She picked up the full coffee pot, filling the cups as she kept talking. “She made it perfectly clear she felt the same way about me. She liked the money she got from the government, though.” She added, setting the coffee pot on the burner. “Used it to buy booze and drugs.”

  “I’m sorry to hear that.” Something in my chest pinched, but another thing released—he didn’t know. Couldn’t know, because for all the things he was…my father wasn’t the kind of man to leave a child in a situation like that.

  “It’s not your fault that she was a piece of shit. Hell, I don’t even know if it was her fault.” Raina sighed, her brow furrowing like she wished she could immediately drawback her words.

  “Yeah, I get that.” I sighed, thinking of my dad—of our dad. I wanted to knock him out for straying from mom even for a minute, but there was always more to the story—I knew that better than anybody.

  We all made choices that had consequences we might not have seen with our backs pressed against the wall. We were all products of our own backstories, but I was beginning to see that what we did with the future was entirely up to us. Taking control of my own had taught me that.

  Leaving both the coffees black, she brought the mugs over to the counter I sat at, setting one down in front of me. I picked it up, hesitating before sipping it.

  “I finally convinced my boss to spend a little more on coffee.” She assured me from the other side of the counter, sipping hers without flinching. “Now that we have rock stars frequenting our diner, he gave in.”

  “Glad we could help.” I brought the white ceramic mug to my lips, pausing. “I’m sorry to hear that. About your mom, I mean. A kid should never be told those kinds of things.”

  “I was told a lot of things before the caseworker finally removed me from her care,” Raina replied, looking away. “She’s dead now. My mom, I mean. Overdosed a few years back.”

  “I’m sorry,” my brow knitted together, heart hurting. I’d been a big brother for as long as I could remember, and the urge to protect my little sister was always a strong one. All along, I’d recognized that there was a connection to this abrasive server, a familiarity I couldn’t put my finger on. To hear that her life had always been a struggle was painful.

  “It’s fine,” she assured me, her icy blue eyes locking on mine to drive the point home. “It’s been six years. She was never much of a mother to me, anyway.”

  I drew in a heavy breath. “Did he know?”

  Raina blinked, tilting her chin up in defense. “I don’t know. My mother was a narcissistic pathological liar. She was so manipulative. I never knew the truth of anything.”

  “So…how did you find out?”

  She turned her head, looking at the farthest point in the room from me. Drawing in a breath, she pursed her lips and shook her head, finally looking at me again. “Her high school yearbook. I found it when I was eleven, and she split my lip when I asked her who Michael Jacobs was. I never asked again…but I remembered the name and the face. You have the same one.”

  “Yeah, I’m aware.” I resisted the urge to crack the tension from my neck, leaning forward a little. “Him and I, we have a complicated relationship…we’re too much alike. But he has always been amazing with Connor, my—our little sister.”

  She stiffened. “I’m not ready for an instant family, Calum. I know that’s your thing, but it’s not mine.” Her harsh words would hurt weaker men, but I just grinned—which pissed her off even more.

  “You’re going to have to get used to it, facts are facts. Welcome to the family, sister.”

  Four hours later, I parked the Jeep in my parents’ driveway. The click of Asher’s seat belt acknowledged he’d already unbuckled it, and Harper followed suit, pausing when she realized I hadn’t moved.

  I unbuckled my belt too, sending her what I hoped was a comforting smile. She knew I’d stopped in to talk to Raina this morning, confirming my suspicions were true. She understood that I was mad as hell at my father—for being unfaithful to my mother, for not rescuing Raina from a shit childhood. But I also didn’t know for certain if he’d known. About Raina, anyway.

  I really didn’t think my father was the type of man to abandon a child, but I couldn’t ask him during our first family brunch. What a mind fuck that was. Opening my door, I stepped outside and prayed that I’d make it through the next two hours without saying something stupid.

  We walked up the front walkway. Asher rang the doorbell, and a moment later it opened. My dad stood on the other side. “You don’t need to ring that, just come in next time.” His words—while gruffly spoken—were free from the usual bite I was accustomed to. The reception this time around was…warmer.

  Asher wrapped his arms around my dad’s waist, hugging him. “Hi Grandpa!”

  “Hey, Asher.” The smile on my dad’s face could only be described as bright—similar to the ones he used to give me when I was young enough not to get under his skin at every breath.

  I released a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding. Harper’s hand found mine, and she squeezed it, tugging me gently into the foyer. Hearing the sound of our voices, my mom and Connor drifted out from the dining room, along with the scent of all the breakfast staples—bacon, sausage, eggs, toast, pancakes.

  Once the hugs and greetings were out of the way and we wandered into the dining room. I glanced at the beautiful oak table and the delicious spread of food laid out on it, and my heart pinched a little.

  Whatever troubles I’d had with my father in my teens and beyond, I know I’d been given a good childhood.

  Sensing the somber change in my emotions, Harper’s hand pressed against the small of my back, rousing me into stepping forward. I pulled a chair out for her and waited until she’d sat down in it before pulling my own seat out. My mom had seen to Asher, setting him up across the table beside Connor and my dad.

  “What would you like, honey?” Mom’s voice asked, gesturing to the options in front of us. As Asher told her his favourites and she loaded up his plate, I tried to relax and enjoy the moment.

  It was our first time attending a family brunch as well, as a family—and that was something to be thankful for. But my thoughts kept going back to Raina and Nik, to yet another branch of my family I had no idea existed.

  “I said, have you found a contractor yet?” My father repeated, his impatient tone and scowl pulling me from my thoughts. I blinked, reminding myself that now wasn’t the time.

  “For the home studio, yes. For the other stuff…not yet. We’re in no rush, though.”

  “We’re?” My dad frowned.

  “Yes, we. Harper and Asher are moving in next weekend.”

  “I see.” I couldn’t tell if he could see—didn’t know if he was pleased with that information or mad about it, but either way—it didn’t matter. Harper and I were more steadfast than ever about it.

  Raina and Nik were moving into Harper’s house in a week. In time…my father would understand the absolute mind fuck of finding out you had a kid, and the pain of knowing you’d missed out on their life up to a certain point. The drive to appreciate the now.

  That thought settled me more than any other, and I was able to get through the rest of the brunch with a smile on my face.

  Harper

  It was strange how little time it took to pack up four years of memories. By nine o’clock on Tuesday night, we’d managed to pack up everything upstairs and almost the entirety of the main floor, with the exception of the kitchen. That was with keeping to our regular schedules of school and work, because I hadn’t factored in a sudden move.

  My mother
didn’t understand the rush, but I hadn’t revealed the rush wasn’t to fulfill Calum’s desire to have us there, or mine to be with him. It wasn’t even for us. We knew we didn’t need two houses.

  Asher moved about like an organized tornado, packing up his room faster than I could say “Nik’s moving in on Sunday.” He was ecstatic about all of the changes—moving in with Cal and having his best friend move into this house.

  I told Raina that the house could come fully furnished, but she shook her head and had said “that’s enough charity, thanks. We have furniture.” Only, I’d been inside their apartment before. I knew that Raina slept on the living room sofa and doesn’t have any bedroom furniture, so despite her refusal of more charity…we decided to leave my bedroom set. It was heavy anyway. Calum ordered her a new mattress, and it was scheduled to be delivered on Friday—the same day we rented the moving truck.

  I hadn’t told her what we had planned because I realized she’d likely fight me on it. She was already feeling off balance about everything, but as soon as we found out she slept on the couch—it wasn’t even up for debate, for either of us.

  “She’ll get used to it,” Calum assured me every time I worried that I was pushing her with too much too soon.

  After brunch at his parents, we came back to start packing. We were eager to get it done as quickly as possible so that Raina and Nik could move in. Although she had given her landlord a chunk of money and the date of Sunday to be out, he wasn’t thrilled with her. He was not a warm, empathetic man. He saw dollar signs and resented the fact that Raina had fallen behind in rent payments one too many times. The sooner they got out of there, the better.

  Calum was upstairs, tucking Asher into bed, and I’d been making our teas in the kitchen, staring around and mentally walking myself through my to-do list.

  I’d decided to leave all of the appliances—the Keurig, the mixers and blenders. It was outlined in the rental agreement, along with the washer and dryer, the stove, the refrigerator, and the dishwasher. I’d wrangled that in under the guise of included appliances.