Fannie stopped pacing. “A whistle instead of music. It won’t work.”
“Why not, Fannie?” Noah asked.
“All of us, including the horses are keyed into the beat. We don’t have time to relearn our timing and signals. The Horse Expo is two weeks away.”
Connie clasped her hands together on the red-and-white-checkered tablecloth. “What choice do we have? I had to prepay to reserve the hauler and motel rooms for us. I might get a refund on some of it, but not all of it.”
Fannie moved to stare out the window. “Cut your losses and run, Connie. I’m sorry I ever got you into this.”
Connie moved to put her arm around Fannie. “It was a fine idea. We’ve simply run into a stumbling block.”
“Another one. What next?” She shrugged off Connie’s arm and went outside.
Noah followed her. “Don’t give up. You and your crew can do it. I have faith in you.”
“I don’t have faith in me anymore.”
“Let me take you home.” She was hurting and he had no idea how to help her.
“I’m sorry, Noah. I’d rather be alone.” She paused. “I forgot to ask. Did you win your last game?”
“We did. We’re the league champions.”
“That’s great. I guess I can give the whistle thing a try.” She mounted her horse and rode away, leaving him aching to hold her and comfort her. Ever since he had asked to make their courtship real, she had been pulling away from him. Was it because she knew he might not remain Amish, or was it something else?
* * *
The members of Noah’s ball team crowded into Eric’s office and waited. The coaches of the teams that were being invited to the state tournament were to be notified by phone after ten o’clock on Thursday morning. It was ten fifteen.
“They aren’t going to call.” Walter pushed out of his chair and moved to the window.
“Have faith. We won our league.” Noah, too, was beginning to doubt they would be contacted.
Teams qualified for the invitational by participating in regional tournaments held throughout the state. While finishing in the top generally guaranteed an invitation, it was up to the State Baseball Federation to determine invitees.
“There will be twelve teams in all. It takes time to call everyone.” Eric drummed his fingers on his desk beside his smartphone.
“I need some air.” Walter pushed past Noah and went outside.
Noah followed his friend. “Waiting is the hard part.”
“Not playing will be the hard part.”
“If we don’t get called, there is always next year.”
“You won’t be pitching for us next year. Without your talent, we are only slightly above average players.”
“That’s not true.”
“Isn’t it?”
“What makes you think I won’t be pitching again next year?”
“The girl.”
Noah stared at his shoes. “I’m not sure I’m what she wants.”
“But she is what you want.”
“I’m trying to discover God’s will for me. Is it Fannie? Is it a professional ball career? If that doesn’t work out, will I come home and remain Amish because I’ve failed or because God wants me here? He has to show me the way.”
Walter sighed. “Noah, maybe God wants you to make the choice. Did you ever think of that?”
Noah was saved from answering when he heard the sound of Eric’s cell phone ringing. He and Walter grinned at each other and hurried back inside. Eric picked up the phone and listened. He gave them the thumbs-up sign and everyone cheered.
Noah slapped Walter on the back. “See? Faith.”
“I can’t believe it. This is my shot, Noah. I feel it in my bones.”
“I pray you are right.”
Eric stood. “Everyone is invited to my place for pizza. We need to celebrate.”
The laughing group of men piled out of the office into the main bay of the fire station. Someone started honking the fire engine’s horn.
Noah watched his teammates congratulating each other and realized there was only one person he wanted to share the news with as soon as possible. Fannie would be at her practice. He tapped Walter on the arm. “Can you run me over to Connie Stroud’s farm before you go get pizza?”
“Aren’t you coming with us?”
“I’ll be over later. Save me a slice.”
“Sure. Hop in.”
Ten minutes later, Walter dropped Noah in front of Connie’s barn. Noah entered the building and leaned on the rail. The team was lined up by twos. Fannie blew a whistle once and started forward. They were only a few paces along when Susan came up too quickly and had to pull back. Rose bumped into her and Goldenrod turned to the outside, breaking the pattern.
Rose got her horse back in line as Fannie blew the whistle and started to circle left. Sylvia had been holding back to let Rose regain her position. She turned too short and cut in front of Abbie. The resulting confusion made everyone stop.
Fannie whirled Trinket around and threw down her whistle. “This isn’t going to work.”
Noah stepped into the ring. “What’s going on here?”
“What does it look like? We’re riding without music and making mistake after mistake,” Fannie snapped.
Sylvia looked ready to cry. Abbie and Laura were sniffling.
“We are learning to make our pattern changes when I blow the whistle, only we can’t get it right.” Fannie’s voice shook with frustration.
He crossed to Fannie’s side. “I’m sorry. Where is Timothy?”
“He’s talking to Connie about where the girls should stay in Columbus. They are trying to find someplace less expensive and figure out how we are going to get the carts there.”
“It turns out I’ll be in Columbus at the same time you’ll be there.”
“Your team got the invitation?”
“We did.”
She rolled her eyes. “You must be so thrilled. It’s all working out exactly as you planned.”
He pulled back. “You don’t sound thrilled for me.”
“Am I supposed to be?”
“I thought so. I thought you’d be happy for me. Maybe I was mistaken in your feelings.”
“I guess you were. At least this stupid fake courtship can be over now. I can’t tell you how happy that makes me.”
“Fannie, I know you’re upset, but don’t take it out on me.” He picked up the whistle. “It’s going to take more time, that’s all. You’ll get it.”
“We don’t have more time. We’ve only got two weeks.”
He handed her the whistle. “Everyone here will try their best. Stop being a baby about it and do the work.”
She knocked the whistle from his hand. “That’s easy for you to say. You won your season. You’ll be pitching in the tournament of your dreams. I’m sure you’ll be laughing at us as we make fools of ourselves in front of a thousand people. All our hard work will be for nothing. Connie will have wasted the money she’s already spent on entry fees and motel rooms for us. I wish I’d never come up with this stupid idea, and I wish you’d leave me alone.”
She kicked Trinket into a gallop and shot out the arena door.
Noah started after her, but Susan touched his arm. “Let her go. Let her blow off some steam.”
“You girls are looking to her for leadership.”
“And that’s why she’ll be back when she cools down,” Susan said with a tiny smile.
He sighed. “You’re right. I reckon she has to figure that out for herself.”
The side door flew open and Zoe came running in. She gripped the railing, her eyes wide and frightened. “Come quick.”
Noah started toward her. “What is it?”
&nb
sp; “Fannie tried to jump Trinket over the south fence and they fell. I think she’s hurt bad.”
Noah vaulted over the railing and raced out the door. Fannie was lying facedown in the grass just beyond the smashed board fence. Trinket lay a few feet away from her. He sprinted toward Fannie. Please, Lord, let her be all right.
Sliding to a stop beside her, Noah dropped to his knees as his first-aid training took over. There was blood on the side of her head and face, but she was breathing. Relief surged through his body and he started breathing again, too. He gently took her wrist in his hand to check her pulse. It was erratic but strong. Thank You, God.
He still didn’t know how badly injured she might be, but he knew enough not to move her. Trinket was struggling to get up but couldn’t. Blood covered her neck and front legs.
Connie arrived beside Noah. “How bad is it?”
“I’m not sure.” He leaned down. “Fannie, can you hear me? Speak to me, Fannie.”
“Trinket?” Her voice was a bare whisper, but it was the sweetest sound he’d ever heard.
“I’ll take care of her,” Connie said, moving to the horse. Speaking softly, she eased the mare’s head back to the ground to keep her from moving. She quieted and lay with her sides heaving.
Connie pulled her cell phone from her pocket. “I’m calling 911.”
“I’m so sorry,” Fannie whispered. She closed her fingers over Noah’s hand.
“Where are you hurt, liebchen?”
“I can’t move—my legs.” Her fingers went limp.
Noah squeezed them tighter. “Fannie, Fannie stay with me.”
She didn’t respond. Please, God, don’t take her from me. Not now, not before I’ve told her how much I love her.
He leaned close and kissed her pale cheek. “I love you, Fannie. Do you hear me? I love you.”
* * *
She had only herself to blame.
Her foolish, childish temper tantrum had cost her dearly.
Fannie lay inside the MRI machine at the hospital, listening to the thudding sounds it made. The doctor had explained that it would take detailed images of her spine and show what was wrong. It would tell them if she would walk again.
She was afraid to pray for herself. Afraid it was too late to ask God to heal her, but she prayed He would spare Trinket. Her poor, brave horse had done everything Fannie had asked and received only pain as a reward.
Fannie didn’t remember anything after flying over Trinket’s head until she woke up being wheeled into the emergency entrance of the hospital. She tried to look for Noah, but she couldn’t move her head. Then she heard his voice telling her to lie still. The rest of her admission was a blur of bits and pieces, until now.
Finally, the hammering sound stopped and someone spoke to her from the end of the tunnel she lay in. Her bed moved backward, bringing her into the bright lights of the imaging room.
She couldn’t turn her head away from their glare. A hard plastic collar around her neck prevented any movement. She closed her eyes as she was wheeled out. When her bed stopped moving, she swallowed against the pain the jolt caused in her back.
“We are here, Fannie.” Her mother’s voice made Fannie open her eyes again. Her parents were bending over her. There were tears in their eyes.
“Don’t worry, Mamm. I’m fine.” Fannie smiled to prove her point, but neither parent look relieved. “How is Trinket?”
Her father laid a hand on her head. “Noah told us Connie is taking care of her. The vet was on his way. As soon as Connie knows something for sure, she will call Noah and he will tell you. You are not to worry about your horse now. You are to get well.”
The young doctor she had seen earlier came up to the other side of her bed. “I’m happy to say she is going to do just that if she takes it easy and does as we tell her.”
“She will walk again?” Fresh tears poured down her mother’s face.
“She has two burst-fractured vertebrae, but her spinal cord is intact. The bones are cracked, but none of the pieces are displaced. She won’t need surgery. Her paralysis is most likely caused by what we call spinal shock. It can last a few hours to a few weeks after an injury like this. We are giving her anti-inflammatory medicine to relieve the tissue swelling and pressure. Other than a nasty concussion, we didn’t find anything else abnormal. Fannie, can you wiggle your toes for me?”
She concentrated and moved her left foot a fraction.
“Good. The steroids are already helping. You are a very fortunate young woman. Our physical therapy department will fit you with a back brace that must be worn at all times while the bones mend.”
“Will I be able to ride again?” Fannie whispered.
“Not for several months, but eventually, yes. I suggest you avoid having your horse step on your back in the future.”
“Is that what happened? I don’t remember. Trinket would never hurt me on purpose.”
“I’m a horseman myself, so I believe you. I’m having the nurse give you something to help you rest. We will move you to a regular room when one is available. Expect to stay with us for at least three days. I know the Amish don’t believe in medical insurance, so I will get you home as soon as I can.”
The nurse came in and injected something into Fannie’s IV. “This is going to make you sleepy very quickly.”
Fannie’s father held out his hand. “Danki, Herr Doktor. We are deeply grateful to you.”
The doctor shook his hand. “I did my part, but God was looking after her.”
When the man left the room, Fannie’s mother leaned down to kiss her brow. “We are so thankful. Noah is waiting outside. Shall I have him come in?”
Shame blossomed in Fannie’s heart. She remembered the cruel words she’d spoken to Noah. None of it was true. Yet God in His mercy had spared her life after all the deceit she had carried out. It was time to make a clean breast of it.
“Mamm, I have to tell you something first and I don’t want you to be angry with Noah. He thought he was helping me.”
Her parents exchanged puzzled glances.
“What are you talking about?” her mother asked.
“Noah and I are not courting. We never were. We made up the story so I could stay and ride in the drill team instead of going to Florida. I truly wanted to help Connie, but that doesn’t change the fact that what I did was wrong.”
“You lied to us?” Her mother drew back.
“I did. Please forgive me.”
Her father’s brow darkened. “And Noah lied to his family about this, too?”
“Yes,” she answered softly, ashamed that she had suggested the scheme in the first place and had to lay any part of the blame at his door. “I’m so sorry.”
“We will speak of this again when you are home.” Her father put his arm around her mother’s shoulders.
There was a knock at the door and Noah looked in. Relief filled his eyes. “You’re awake.”
“Come in.” Fannie blinked and had trouble focusing on his dear face. She had so much to atone for.
“The doctor said it’s good news. You’re going to be fine,” Noah said.
“Noah, I had to tell them.”
He stepped inside. “Tell them what?”
“That we aren’t courting. That we made it up.”
“Fannie, I need to talk to you about us.” He looked at her parents. “It’s not what you think.”
“I know how upset your mother will be and I am ashamed of my daughter’s part in this.” Fannie heard the disapproval in her mother’s voice, but she couldn’t keep her eyes open any longer. “I’m sorry, Noah, but now you are free.”
* * *
He didn’t want to be free.
The door opened behind Noah and a nurse came in. “We have a room for her now. I
f you’ll wait outside for a few minutes while we get her ready, you can follow us when we leave.”
Noah longed to tell Fannie his true feelings, but she was already asleep. He would have to wait. He held the door for Fannie’s parents and felt their disapproval as they passed. Outside in the hall, they turned to him. He wanted Fannie to hear his words first, but it was her parents who needed to know his intentions now.
He took a deep breath. “What Fannie has told you is the truth, but it isn’t the whole truth. I agreed to a pretend courtship because my parents were pressuring me to stop playing ball, join the faith and take a wife. I wasn’t ready for that.”
“I can’t believe the two of you have deceived us this way.” Belinda dabbed at her eyes with her handkerchief.
“It was wrong and I beg your forgiveness. But I want you to know my feelings for Fannie have changed. I am in love with your daughter. I kept up the pretense of a courtship because I wanted to be with her, not because I needed to convince you or my parents of my continued affections. I love her, and I pray that she loves me.”
Ernest stroked his beard. “You aren’t certain of my daughter’s feelings?”
“Fannie and I quarreled before her accident. We both said hurtful things. You know her temper. I’m not sure she will believe me when I tell her how I truly feel.”
Belinda gave him a watery smile. “Fannie is quick to anger and often speaks in haste, but I have seen a change in her recently. I believe it is because she has come to care for you, too, Noah, but Fannie can’t be pushed into anything. She only digs in her heels.”
The door to Fannie’s room opened and two nurses wheeled her bed into the hall. Noah stood back to let them pass. He gently touched Fannie’s shoulder, but she didn’t open her eyes. One of the nurses said, “We are moving her to room 211. You can follow us, if you like.”
They started down the hall with Belinda walking behind them. Ernest laid a hand on Noah’s shoulder. “Fannie is a lot like my Belinda was when I first met her. Sassy, full of vinegar and determined to be independent. Like her mother, my daughter can be led, but she can’t be driven. You have your work cut out for you.”
Their Pretend Amish Courtship Page 16
