Desire & Denial (Southern Boys Book 3)

by K. C. Wells

  Because he wasn’t going to get any sleep, that was for damn sure.

  Jon lay there in the dark, trying not to think about the implications of what he’d heard. One thing could no longer be denied.

  They want me. They fucking want me.

  And Jon had no clue what to do about that.

  Chaz lay on his back on the couch, Kendis on top of him, both of them trying to get their breathing back to normal. That was…

  Chaz had no words. Kendis had surprised the fuck out of him.

  As if he’d heard Chaz’s thought, Kendis raised his head. “Whoa. I have no idea where that came from.”

  “I do.” Chaz cupped Kendis’s chin and locked gazes with him. “Same place my fantasies come from.” Hearing Kendis voice his needs like that had been more arousing that Chaz had anticipated.

  Kendis’s eyes gleamed. “Well?”

  Chaz knew what he was asking, but he liked playing dumb. “Well what?” Kendis caressed his chest with a leisurely hand, pausing to flick his nipple with his thumb, which sent a shiver rippling through Chaz’s sweat-slick body. “I guess they’re a little sensitive.”

  Kendis gave him a mock glare. “You know what I’m askin’.”

  Chaz chuckled. He reached down and tugged Kendis higher up his body until their mouths met in a soft kiss. “I loved it,” Chaz murmured against Kendis’s lips. “I loved feeling you inside me.” The contented sigh that followed made him feel like a million dollars. “And I wanna feel it again real soon.” Kendis buried his face in Chaz’s neck, and Chaz held onto him, stroking gently down his back.

  This was perfect.

  “Are you pleased with yourself?”

  Chaz laughed quietly. “Hey, it worked, right? I mean, after that, one thing’s pretty fuckin’ clear.”

  Kendis laughed softly. “Yeah. We both want to fuck Jon.” He tilted his head toward the door. “Do you really think he was listening?” He shook his head. “The things that come out of your mouth. ‘My tight virgin hole’?”

  Chaz chuckled. “I would’ve loved to have seen his face when he heard that.”

  “Yeah, but can we be sure he heard it?”

  Chaz laughed. “You didn’t hear him, did ya? That sound he made, kinda of a grunt? Wanna bet he was shooting his load when he did that? And another thing. His door closed just now.”

  “Okay, okay, so he heard us. What do we do now?”

  Chaz thought about it. “I guess we just unzipped our fly. It’s up to Jon what he does next.”

  “And you still don’t think this is wrong?” Dark brown eyes focused on his.

  Chaz shook his head. “Look at it this way. He wants us, we want him. We’re not hurtin’ each other, are we? We’re not hurtin’ anyone else. An’ something you said really got to me.”

  “What was that?”

  “You mentioned needing to help him.” Chaz hadn’t been able to shove that idea aside. Everything he knew about Jon told him the man was lonely as hell, and needed them. Okay, so Jon was hot, and the prospect of the three of them together was hotter still…

  The three of us.

  There was something about this whole situation Chaz couldn’t understand. Jon was older than them. Both of them wanted him. More than that, Chaz could see the three of them working out. And none of it fazed him. Sure, he’d fantasized about Jon before he’d ever met Kendis, but there was more to this than sex.

  Chaz was certain of that.

  Kendis gingerly lifted himself off of Chaz. “I think it’s clean-up time again.”

  Chaz smiled. “Followed by you an’ me sleepin.’ The thought of falling asleep with Kendis wrapped around him sent a wave of pleasure gently washing over him. But with that came a tingle of anticipation as Kendis’s question echoed in his head.

  “So, what do we do now?”

  Fucked if he knew. Chaz was playing this by ear.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Saturday Dec 23

  Jon kept his focus on the eggs in the pan when Chaz came into the kitchen behind him. “Mornin’.” That was as much as Jon felt capable of after the previous night. He felt certain one look at his face would reveal every little thing that had passed through his mind as he’d lain there, listening to them fucking.

  Only it wasn’t just the fuckin’ was it? I got pulled into it too. And hadn’t that shocked the fuck out of him?

  “Good morning. Want me to help with breakfast?” Chaz appeared next to him.

  Jon inclined his head toward the bag of English muffins. “You can put those in the toaster oven for me. Coffee’s on.”

  Chaz got on with his task, and when silence fell between them, Jon breathed a little easier. Maybe he’s not gonna mention it either.

  Behind them, Kendis came into the kitchen. “Lord, I ache this morning.”

  Jon had to bite his tongue.

  “Not that it’s all that surprising,” he continued. “I woke up to find I was right on the edge of the mattress. Someone was hogging the rest of it.”

  To Jon’s ears, it sounded like Kendis was trying hard not to laugh. Then he considered his words. That bed wasn’t built for two, and if Kendis was going to be a regular visitor, maybe Jon needed to do something about that.

  “Hey, you can always sleep on the couch,” Chaz retorted.

  “Do you want me sleeping on the couch?”

  Chaz moved out of Jon’s line of sight. Jon didn’t have to turn around to know they were kissing, and the knowledge warmed him.

  He cleared his throat. “You two got any plans for today?”

  “Nope, other than hang out with this one as much as I can,” Chaz replied.

  “And Momma’s working today,” Kendis added. “She’s not working tomorrow though. I get to spend Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and the day after with her.”

  “Hey, where do I fit in those plans?” Chaz sounded genuinely unhappy about the prospect. Not that Jon blamed him for that. If it were his boyfriend, he’d be stealing all the time he could with him.

  “You’re gonna be at Del’s on Christmas Day, right? So… I’ll see you the day after. I’m pretty sure by then Momma will want me out from under her feet for a while.” Kendis’s voice softened. “You know I’m gonna miss you too, don’t you?”

  “Yeah.”

  When all talk stopped, Jon knew they were kissing again. They’d probably kiss all day if they could. Jon thought they had the right idea. Hell, if I had a guy, that’s what I’d be doin’. He gave an internal snort. That wasn’t all they’d be doing, and he doubted they’d see beyond his bedroom door for a week.

  The eggs were done. Jon dished them up, relieved to find Chaz had managed to toast at least two muffins. They sat at the table, and Kendis filled the mugs with coffee.

  “There’s something I’d like to do today, and I thought you two might wanna join me.” As soon as he’d said the words, Jon regretted them. Sure enough, Kendis blinked, and Chaz smirked. Jon rolled his eyes, but didn’t pursue that line of thought.

  “I’m thinking of getting a tree,” he announced. When both regarded him blankly, he stared at them. “A Christmas tree? You know… big, green thing that stands in the corner of the room, shedding needles everywhere?”

  Kendis’s eyes lit up. “Oh yeah. You did mention that.” Then he frowned. “Will there be any left? It’s only two days till Christmas.”

  “Let me worry about that,” Jon said firmly. He’d find one somewhere. “I was wondering if you’d like to come with me. Plus, later, I might need your help decorating it.” He knew it was an excuse. He just wanted to spend time with them.

  “Your momma’s ornaments,” Kendis said with a smile. “I think that sounds great. We’d love to help you. Isn’t that right?” He gave Chaz a pointed stare.

  “Huh? Oh. Sure.” Chaz nodded.

  Jon was loving this interplay. It was good to see Kendis taking the lead. “Then let me check on where we can get one.” He knew there was no place in town, least-ways none he could recall, but he did re
collect seeing trees for sale near Knoxville.

  He attacked his eggs with enthusiasm, his apprehension melting away. They’re not gonna mention last night.

  Not that Jon was ever going to forget it.

  “There it is!” Kendis called out, pointing toward the signpost on the side of the road. “White Pine Acres.”

  Jon cackled. “It’s not as if you could miss it.” Christmas trees lined the driveway, all lit up with white lights, and from farther back came the schmaltzy sound of distinctly Christmas-y music. He pulled the truck onto the driveway and headed past the house, following the arrows.

  “Hey, they still got trees,” Chaz said gleefully.

  Jon rolled his eyes. “Yeah. That’s what they said when I called them before we left the house.” He switched off the engine and they got out. Jon wore his thickest jacket, and he’d loaned scarves and woolen hats to Chaz and Kendis. In the back of the truck were a pair of gardening gloves he’d found in the garage.

  They walked up to where a bunch of people were standing around a fire pit, roasting marshmallows and drinking something steaming hot from paper cups.

  Chaz’s nose twitched. “I smell hot chocolate.”

  Jon chuckled. “That’s for after we’ve done the hard work.”

  “What work?” Kendis peered at their surroundings. Then the penny dropped. “We have to chop down our own tree?” He appeared delighted. “Cool.”

  Jon spoke briefly with the guy in charge, then pointed toward the trees. “C’mon, boys. Let’s go find us a tree.”

  As they walked between the trees that stood in regimented lines, Chaz leaned in. “Find us a tree?”

  “Yeah, us. It’s your home, just like it is mine.” Jon put his arm around Chaz’s shoulder and squeezed. “That okay with you?”

  “More than okay.” Chaz smiled. “I guess my new family just grew a little.” He glanced across at Kendis.

  “You got that right.” Jon stopped in front of a beautiful pine tree. It had to be at least eight feet tall, and big and bushy, just like the trees he remembered as a kid. “This one,” he said, brushing his fingers through its branches.

  Kendis nodded. “It’s a beauty. Have you got enough ornaments to cover it?”

  Jon couldn’t help it. He burst out laughing. When Kendis gave him a quizzical look, Jon smiled. “Just wait ‘n’ see. You’ll understand when we get home.”

  It was only as the guy in charge went to find him a bow saw that the full import of his words sank in.

  That house finally felt like a home, and that was down to Chaz—and Kendis.

  It seemed like no time at all before they had their tree baled and stowed in the truck. They stayed long enough for Jon to pay for the tree, and to sample the hot chocolate, not that Chaz would’ve let them leave without having tried some. Jon drew the line at roasting marshmallows.

  “You wanna do that, we’ll do it at home. I’ll light a fire.” He intended doing that anyhow: the chill in the air had grown more noticeable. “An’ speakin’ of home, let’s go. You’re gonna help me get some boxes down from the attic.”

  “Just how many boxes do you have up there?” Chaz asked, squinting.

  Jon gazed at him with a hopefully innocent expression. “A few.”

  Yeah right.

  “Aw, c’mon, that’s gotta be the last one,” Kendis called up to him in the attic. “How many ornaments did your momma have? There’s gotta be at least seven or eight boxes in the living room already. Any more, and there won’t be room for us.”

  Jon peered down at him through the hatch. “This here is the last one,” he said, holding it out. Kendis climbed the ladder and took it from him before carefully retreating backwards. Jon took a last glance around the roof space to check he hadn’t missed anything, but there were no more boxes labeled Christmas to be seen.

  Thank God for that.

  He climbed down the ladder, shortened it, then pushed it up through the hatch, closing it with the pulley. As he stepped into the living room, warmth greeted him—Chaz had lit a fire. Kendis was sitting on the floor in the middle of all the boxes, clearly waiting for permission to open them.

  The more time Jon spent around them, the more he liked them. How could he not like two sweet, caring guys? Then he reconsidered. They had a not-so-sweet side too, a decidedly wicked side, if the previous night was anything to go by.

  Jon didn’t mind a little wickedness now and then.

  He sat on the couch and pulled the nearest box to him. The tree was already standing in the corner, its bare branches a luscious green next to the cream walls.

  “All the stuff in these boxes,” Kendis began. “Is it all from when you were a kid?”

  Jon nodded. “Some of it they bought when Del was born. The fact that anything survived the pair of us is a miracle.” He carefully eased open the flaps of cardboard, sighing when he saw the box’s contents. “Oh wow.”

  “Don’t you know what’s in ’em?” Chaz asked, joining him.

  Jon chuckled. “These boxes are as I found them at my momma’s place. I haven’t seen inside these for years.” He lifted out a coil of lights, the bulbs large, pointed, and made of colored red, green, yellow and white glass.

  Chaz cackled. “I’m guessin’ they didn’t do LED lights back then.”

  Jon laughed. “We’re talking the seventies. These were probably the in thing back then.” He shook his head. “Lord, I remember…” He cupped one of the bulbs. “These babies screw in. And if one goes out, they all do.” He let out a soft chuckle. “I recall me an’ Del, trying bulb after bulb, trying to find out which one had blown.”

  “Do they still work?” Kendis asked.

  “Let’s find out.” Jon handed Chaz the plug, and Chaz fed it into the wall outlet. The lights came on and Jon gasped. “Holy fuck. I bet that’s the first time they ever did that. Momma must’ve checked ’em before she packed ’em away.” The bright lights brought back so many memories.

  “Let me put them on the tree while you two sort out what else is goin’ on it?” Chaz suggested.

  Jon nodded, smiling. “That would be great.” He handed over the string of lights.

  Kendis opened another box. “What is this stuff?” He held up strands of silver that caught the light.

  Jon laughed. “Oh my God. The icicle strands. They’re like tinsel, only single strands. You were supposed to place them carefully on individual branches.” He snorted. “Not that me an’ Del ever did that. We would just toss ’em on, any which way.” He sighed. “I can still hear Momma tellin’ us ‘That’s not how they’re supposed to go on.’ We’d be finding icicle strands everywhere for months after the holidays.”

  Kendis set the box aside. “Then they’ll go on last, an’ we’ll do it properly.” He pointed to one of the largest boxes. “Let’s open that one.”

  Jon pulled it to him and opened the flaps. He grinned. “Oh my. What every house had to have for the holidays.” He reached in and lifted out the large ceramic Christmas tree with its tiny lights and snow-covered branch tips. “This used to stand on the stereo.” When Kendis gave him a quizzical glance, Jon snorted. “I keep forgetting. Some words have gone out of use since you were born. A stereo was a receiver, a turntable, a tape deck, and speakers.” When Kendis looked none the wiser, Jon reached out and stroked his head. “You don’t need to know. It’s not important, put it that way. What is important was that my momma bought this tree for my first Christmas.”

  “Oh wow.” Kendis held out his hands, and Jon placed it almost reverently in them. He turned it around, gazing at it. “It still looks good, considering.”

  Jon arched his eyebrows. “Considering what, exactly?” He sat back and waited for Kendis to dig himself out of the hole he’d just begun work on.

  “Well…” Kendis coughed. “Considering its… age…”

  “I think you’d better stop right there,” Chaz said loudly from the corner. “Unless you don’t like your balls where they are right now?”

  K
endis blinked. He jerked his head to stare at Jon, who gazed back at him, dying to laugh. At last Kendis sighed heavily. “I’m sorry. It’s just that… How can I explain it?” He held up the ceramic tree. “This is old. Delicate. Fragile even.” He stared pointedly at Jon. “In my mind, you’re none of those.”

  It was perhaps the best compliment Jon had ever received.

  He leaned over and kissed Kendis on the cheek. “Thank you,” he whispered. Then he cleared his throat. “How about we open up the rest, and get that tree decorated before dinner time arrives?” He cocked his head. “You are stayin’ for dinner, ain’tcha? You know you’re more than welcome.”

  Kendis’s eyes were warm. “I’d like that.”

  Jon nodded. “Okay then. Open up another box, and let’s see what else survived.”

  So far, this had to be one of the best days Jon had had in a long while, and he knew that was due entirely to Chaz and Kendis. What stuck in his mind was the feel of Kendis’s cheek when he’d kissed it.

  What Jon yearned for was the touch of Kendis’s lips against his.

  Because, Lord, he wanted to kiss Kendis.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Sunday Dec 24

  All that morning, Kendis couldn’t shake the idea that something was wrong. He couldn’t put his finger on it, and the feeling wouldn’t go away. Momma was quiet, and at first Kendis put that down to a long shift at the hospital on Saturday. But as the day wore on, the silence in the house grew oppressive, until his chest was so tight he found it difficult to breathe.

  What in the hell is going on?

  Kendis loved Christmas Eve. It was one of his favorite days of the year, and so often the following day was a letdown in comparison. There was something magical about it: the anticipation, the preparations, the excitement in the air…

  Whatever was going on was killing his buzz.

  Chaz had texted at various times during the day, and Kendis had replied, making sure not to share his growing apprehension. What could I tell him anyhow? That I had a ‘feeling’? All he knew was, whatever was gnawing away at him had taken the shine off the previous day.