Now Open Your Eyes (Stay With Me series Book 3)

by Nicole Fiorina

  The sound of my zipper pulled me out and gave me a burst of energy, and before Leigh managed to have her way with me, I rolled out from under her until my chest met the ground.

  A slap against my bare arse woke me. “Rise and shine, Oliver,” a voice called out, and I opened one eye to see Adrian with a big white smile. “Pull up your pants. You’re frightening the kids.”

  The blinding sun glared from above. Groaning, I lifted myself onto my forearm and pulled up my pants before rolling on to my back. Despite the morning chill, the poison from last night drained from my pores. “James and Reggi, are they all right?”

  “Oh, they’re all right, alright,” Adrian laughed as we clasped each other’s forearms, and he pulled me into a sitting position over the front lawn. My cigarettes were tossed in my lap as he slapped my back with his other hand.

  I lit the match and pulled the cigarette to my mouth. The crisp menthol oozed down my throat and filled my lungs, and my eyes closed once the wicked high from the nicotine soothed me. “Last night was fucked up,” I stated as the cigarette smoke mixed with the cold air. My arms draped over my bent knees, and I hung my head. “This isn’t me. This isn’t who I am or what I stand for.”

  “Is this any of us, really?” Adrian blew out a long and hesitant sigh. “Listen, there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell ya.” I tilted my head, eyes squinting from the sun. Adrian rolled his head back and cracked his knuckles. “Last night, I overheard Dex talking to those two wankers about you.”

  “Yeah? What about me?”

  “About a lead or some shit.”

  My heart jumped into my throat. I tried to swallow it back down.

  Adrian rubbed his palms together. “They didn’t want to tell you. They knew you wouldn’t have completed the rival raid last night if you knew.”

  It was all I needed to hear before I was already on my feet and storming through the door. The small house smelled of sex and liquor, and a gust of smoke from the blunt James and Reggi were sharing engulfed me before the two jumped from the couch. Dex’s two bodyguards laid passed out in the plastic chairs, and naked women scattered the floor at my feet. I walked around them and turned down the hallway before I pushed open the door of the back room. The boom of the door bouncing off the wall echoed, awaking Dex and his one night stand. “Get the fuck out,” I ordered the black-headed slapper through clenched teeth. She scurried from the bed, collected her clothing from the floor, and breezed past me.

  “Awe, you didn’t have to go and make her leave, Oliver. She could have stayed.” Dex smirked, and my rage pushed me forward until I had him lifted out of the bed and slammed against the wall. “You have a lot of nerve,” he was able to get out before my fist swiped his jaw, whipping his head to the side.

  “What I am is impatient,” I pulled him back up by his biceps and pinned his arms to the wall considering I had nothing else to hold his shirtless body by, “What are you not telling me?”

  Dex Sullivan was many things, but a fighter wasn’t one of them. The only time he held power was when a pistol was in his hand—aside from threats. A weapon was his single source of intimidation. And at the moment, he didn’t have a chance to grab one. He may have been powerless, but I wasn’t. Something I’d tried to teach the other three boys these past few days. It was no coincidence the way humans were created, and by learning how to fight, I’d become my most valuable weapon.

  I slammed another fist into his grin, knocking his tooth out, and it embedded into my knuckle.

  “Scott bought two tickets to the states and boarded a plane in Liverpool yesterday,” Dex rushed out with a mouthful of blood.

  A burn crept behind my eyes as relief set into my soul. “Where in the states?” My voice cracked from emotion.

  “You can’t leave, baby O.”

  My hand moved over his neck, and Dex, like the pussy boy he was without his backup, withered in my hold. “Where did he go?” I screamed, my cheeks shaking and spit flying.

  Dex’s eyes widened, and he croaked something out, but I couldn’t understand, so I loosened my grip from around his neck.

  “New York,” he finally said in a gathered breath. “He flew into JFK.”

  I let him go, and he collapsed to the floor. “He traveled with a companion,” he croaked out as I walked away. “Mia Rose Jett.” And the mention of my love’s name managed to crack me open and spin me around to face him. A cackle slipped from his bloody lips. “You’re not done, White Fox. This isn’t over, not until you hold up your end of the deal.”

  I pried my eyelids apart to see the Hilton logo plastered over the ice bucket and plastic cups of the small kitchen, reminding me of where we were. Finally, back in the states. I was so close to my dad’s house, a little over two hours to be exact, but my dad didn’t care to see me. Ethan’s constant reminders told me so.

  A strong arm draped over my side. I inched away from Ethan’s hold for a quick shower before he would wake and searched inside the duffle for a pair of sweats, clean panties, and one of Ethan’s plain tees he wouldn’t need. All my clothes were left at Dolor. I had close to nothing aside from the clothes I wore when he captured me and the few he’d purchased.

  The night before, I’d told Ethan that I could try. I’d left it open-ended intentionally, allowing him room to fill in whatever missing pieces he needed. Try to get through this, try not to kill him, try to trust him. Over and over, Ethan drilled into my head how he was the only one who ever cared about me. The evidence laid out before my eyes, and my mind agreed, but my heart refused to listen. No one was looking for me. No one else cared. The only reason I’d gotten on that plane was because if Ollie was looking out for himself, I had to do the same.

  I had to start thinking about me. I had to put myself first. I had to learn to live without Ollie though it hurt like hell.

  Despite what Ollie had done, it still brought me peace to know he was living the dream he deserved. He gave me a sense of myself over the last two years, pulled me out from a dark hole, was the first to show me who I was, and what I was capable of. Oliver Masters, regardless if he tossed me to the side to go after his dream, gave me something I needed during one of the most challenging times of my life. Oliver Masters gave me something to hold on to for a lifetime.

  But the distance didn’t make it hurt any less.

  If Ollie was able to do it, maybe I could too.

  And Ethan was the answer.

  Ethan killed people—numerous people, which I found intriguing. I had so many questions for him. Did it bring him a sense of serenity like it had brought me when I’d killed my uncle? Did he have monstrous thoughts too, punishing those who’d destroyed him? Did he feel empowered, being the one in control? Did the void in their eyes give him the same high as it did me? So many questions, and maybe Ethan was right, and we were the same.

  The shower was hot against my back. The little Hilton travel-sized shampoo and conditioner smelled of rain in the spring, feminine. Very different from the coconut smell at Dolor, and the masculine scent I’d been using of Ethan’s lately.

  The clothes hung off my tiny frame, but I didn’t care, assuming we’d spend the day in the car anyway. Ethan had planned everything out, and by the looks of the vehicle, new identities, and cash found in the glovebox, we weren’t flying anywhere else. At least for a while.

  My hair was still damp, but I couldn’t pull it up off my back because I had no hair tie. When I walked back toward the bed, Ethan sat awake on the edge of the bed staring at me.

  “How did you sleep?” he asked, still wearing the same clothes from yesterday. We were too tired to change, and apparently, he was too tired to take anything off. Ethan rarely slept in his clothes.

  “Okay,” I dropped the wet towel in the corner of the room, “I need to borrow a pair of your socks.”

  “You can take whatever you want from the bag, Jett. I see you’re already wearing my shirt,” he raised a brow and stood to his feet, “Anyway, I’m taking a quick shower then we have to
head out. We’ll get breakfast on the way.”

  “Where are we going?”

  He paused halfway to the bathroom at my side and looked down at me. “It’s best if you don’t know.”

  While Mia was in the shower, I’d rang Dean. Thankfully, he had picked up because I needed someone I looked up to for answers. I needed direction. The last thing I wanted to admit to my friend was that I’d tore Mia away, and she’d never agreed to any of this until last night. Dean hadn’t held back and chewed my arse out. I’d never heard him so angry. When it came to love and relationships, the man reminded me of Masters. A few minutes into the call, I’d grown frustrated with how the conversation was going and hung up. Fuck him. But Dean was right. Regardless of whether I liked it or not, it was what I needed to hear.

  Mia stood at my side as we checked out of the hotel. I’d promised to keep her safe, but all I’d done was break her down entirely only to build her into my version of perfection. I wanted her mine. All of her. Both the storm and the compliant little puppet. I was almost there too, feeding on how fucked up she was. I’d turned her against the entire world for my benefit. Most of it had been true, though. In all honesty, I had no idea why Lynch, Bruce, nor Masters were out looking for her. But I’d used it to my advantage.

  Dean had reminded me of the man I was turning into, and what I’d needed to do to, not only save Mia but myself as well.

  Mia and I couldn’t move forward, not like this. I’d told her that everyone had been lying to her, but if we didn’t stop now, she’d be living a lie for the rest of her life. Mia would never love me the way she loved him. Even now, as we walked together toward the car, it was a fucking lie. The air between us reeked of a frontage, an act she was forcing herself to be a part of while her mind was elsewhere. We both knew it. Neither of us had to say the words out loud. Love turned us all into fools.

  I unlocked the car and opened the passenger door for her after throwing the duffle in the backseat. She paused before getting into the car.

  “I just want you to know that I understand,” she quietly said and sucked in a breath. “I get why you did it. There was no way I would’ve been able to sleep at night if I knew my rapist was still living. I had a lot of time to think about it, and I agree. You and me are the same. I get that now.”

  “Jett—”

  Mia wrapped her arms around my waist, and I’d suddenly forgotten what I was going to say, but it would probably be something I would have regretted. I held her close, and we stayed like that for a while. I didn’t want to let the moment pass, but all things that were only here for a season needed to come to an end at some point. The day with my mum reminded me of that. This entire time, I’d thought Masters was the season, but I couldn’t have been more wrong.

  I was Mia’s season. A harsh fucking winter, nonetheless.

  “Come on, let’s get inside. You’re shaking,” I stripped off my jacket and wrapped it around Mia before we got into the car.

  The heat cranked on high as I drove around the car park for a few minutes to get acquainted with driving on the opposite side. Mia laughed, and it was the first time I’d heard her laugh in a while. Possibly Dean was all wrong. Maybe he didn’t have it all figured out, and Mia and I could stay exactly like this for the rest of our lives.

  “You got this!” Mia praised at my side, I took her hand and drove out of the lot and onto a busy street.

  I don’t got this, and you have no idea why.

  After going through a drive-thru, I entered the highway to our next destination. Mia ordered assorted pastries and a hazelnut coffee, eating every single one before passing out beside me. Last night, I’d heard her soft cries all hours of the night. She had to be exhausted, and I was too.

  The entire ride, she’d slept in a curled ball to my right with my arm hanging over her leg, my large hand snug between her thighs. I didn’t want to let go as she murmured incoherent slurs in her sleep, and my lips twitched to smile.

  We made it four hours later, thanks to traffic, and I pulled the car against the curb and put the gear into park. Mia was still sleeping at my side, drooling into my jacket. I had no clue how she was going to react to this, and I unbuckled my seatbelt, leaned over the console, and pushed the hair from her face. “Jett,” I whispered.

  Her eyes blinked open. “Where are we?”

  “There’s something you have to know.” I didn’t know how to string the words together for her to understand. I’d never been good with words, that was Master’s territory—the overnight poet, who was probably pounding into unfamiliar pussy as we speak. At this very moment, Masters was probably making girls fall in love with him with his fucking words, partying, drinking, smiling, and laughing at the rest of us. I bit the inside of my cheek, knowing I was about to destroy the rest of her too. “I’d made a mistake. I should’ve never taken you. It was cruel, selfish even.”

  Mia sat up, her stringy brown hair whipped against her sticky face as she turned her head and looked at the surroundings. “My dad’s?” she whispered, recognizing the street we were on. “You took me back to my dad’s?” Her glossy brown eyes narrowed at me. “Start the car, Ethan! I’m never going back there. I’m not getting out of this car!”

  Her dad, the only man she’d trusted for over ten years, had dropped her off at Dolor two years ago. Here I was, the man she’d finally trusted again since I’d taken her from that place, dropping her arse right back off at her dad’s. Full fucking circle. “Yes, you are.”

  “No!” Tears puddled in her eyes. “Drive!” her fist pounded on the dashboard, and her movements became frantic. “Drive the fucking car!”

  I rubbed my hands up and down my face, trying to pull it together. I couldn’t stop now. I had to see this through. “You’re getting out whether you like it or not. I’ll drag your arse up that driveway by your fucking hair, do you understand me?” My voice broke, and I swallowed the tears back down, “I don’t want you anymore. I made a colossal mistake. You were a big fucking mistake.”

  Mia’s eyes locked on mine, and she tilted her head as if she was seeing right through me. “You don’t mean that.”

  Of course, I didn’t. But if Mia didn’t get out of the car within the next two seconds, I’d be afraid I would never have the strength to do right by her again. “Oh, I’m very certain, Jett. You will only drag me down.”

  Her fist connected with my face, sending my head back.

  For a moment, I couldn’t breathe. A ringing blasted inside my ears and I shook my head until my vision righted again. She busted my lip, and the warm copper taste slipped past my gums. I wiped my lip with the back of my hand, accessing the damage. I didn’t expect that. Perhaps a slap, but not a punch.

  I forced a laugh. “You hit like a fucking girl.”

  “Really? Because you’re the only pussy in this car,” she seethed. “Every day we’ve been together, you’ve done nothing but remind me how no one gives a shit about me. How everyone lied, but you’re the biggest liar of them all. You can’t even be honest with yourself! Look at you, Ethan! You’re fucking pathetic. I’ll keep your secret. I’ll take it to my grave, but I’ll never let you fuck with my head again.”

  “I never fucked with your head, Jett,” I laughed, “That was all you. You were always fucked up to begin with.” I knew what would hurt her the most, and I had to say it. “No wonder Masters left your arse the first chance he got. I’m not making the same mistake.”

  Mia’s hand clenched into a fist as her chin trembled. If she was about to hit me again, I was more prepared this time. But she never did. Instead, she drew in a shaky breath, wiped her eyes, and got out of the car, barefoot in homeless attire. She didn’t even turn back for a second glace, and it took all restraint to not get out of the car and run after her, to apologize for everything I’d said because I didn’t mean any of it. This is the right thing, I repeated over and over in my head. One day she’ll forgive you for this.

  I peeled off the street, driving my foot into the gas before I’d
have a chance to change my mind. Nausea hit me like a tsunami, colliding with an angry coastline, and I slammed my palms against the steering wheel over and over. My vision darkened from the maddening monster inside me, and a scream ripped through my throat as my cheeks shook.

  “I love you, Mia,” I screamed inside the car to absolutely no one. “I’m letting you go because it’s the right thing to do. Because I won’t let the monster fucking win!” The words meant for Mia’s ears flew out of me until my throat went hoarse, crying for the first time since I’d killed Haden Charles.

  Goodbye, Mia.

  I fucking knew it, and my mind has been spinning since I’d left Thurrock. I’d returned to Surrey two hours later because, at first, I’d headed straight for an airport, then realized after approaching the ticket counter, I had absolutely nothing on me. Both my passport and identification weren’t with me, but back here at the motel.

  There was no time for a shower, but I smelled like I’d come from a strip joint. I was in and out within two minutes and changed into something more presentable, something Mia could recognize, grey joggers, a basic white shirt, and a black hoodie. With my mind elsewhere, my hands grabbed clothes from Mia’s suitcase, stuffing them into a backpack. Did she have clothes? What has she been wearing this entire time?

  When I’d called Bruce a few hours ago, he had said she wasn’t there, that he hasn’t heard from her. But there was no other reason I could think of for Scott to fly into New York City, a little under three hours away from Mia’s dad’s house.

  The last two weeks felt like a never-ending chase after her, but if it meant spending the rest of my life looking, I would do it.