Rocks in the Stream
Page 29
“I have discovered what it is like to be truly alone, to be cold and desolate,” he told her, “and it is frightening. There is no one I cherish as I do you. Your gentle heart, understanding spirit, your witty intelligence, and elegant beauty are things without which I cannot live. I adore you. My whole life depends on you and on your answer to this question. My love, will you marry me?”
Through his kisses, she breathed the answer he longed to hear.
“Yes, Fitzwilliam, I will.”
* * * * *
HE HAD DREAMT OF THIS moment from the time that he had received her ribbon. The feelings of being complete, of being whole again, that coursed through his body filled him with an assurance of her love and forgiveness. Never had he understood the depth of his own love for her as he did at that moment.
“I love you, Elizabeth. You are everything to me.”
“And I love you. Fitzwilliam, you said that you knew what it was to feel frightened and truly alone. I never want either of us to feel that way again. You must promise me that we will never part. Now that we have found each other, I never want to be without you.”
“Elizabeth, I —”
“I never want to be without you again. You must promise me.”
“I do promise.” He took her hand and looking deeply into her eyes. “I promise never to leave you. My heart aches that you feel you have to ask me. I wish never to be apart from you from this day on. I promise to love you with all my heart. You are my hope and my dreams. My future is yours, and I will endeavor every day to make it happier than you could ever imagine.”
“And I give myself to you.”
They were each silent for a moment as they considered with happiness the commitment they just made to each other. It was as natural as life itself.
“In a week, I can procure a special license in London, and we can be married. I can leave this very day and —”
“Please, let me come with you to London. There must be something that can be done that will allow us to remain together. There must be a way.” She paused for a moment. “I know! I will ask Jane to take me to our Aunt Gardiner in London, and I will be able to see you every day.”
They would not spend another day without each other, and soon they would not spend another night.
* * * * *
THE LOVERS SAT QUIETLY BY the stream, enjoying their newfound understanding. Oftentimes, words are not necessary between those who love, and this was just such a moment. In her mind, there was a sense of peace and certainty. In his, a determination to make up for all the pain he had caused by loving her in every way that he could. He had no objection to taking her to London. Being separated from her for even a day would never be his choice. Indeed, he was thrilled that she wanted to accompany him.
Releasing her hand, he reached up and began to trace the outline of her lips. The look of love in her eyes testified to him that she truly had forgiven him.
No longer needing words to express their love, he kissed her. She felt as if her heart would leap from her body as he kissed her again and again. She slid an arm around his neck and held his lips against hers, glorying in his touch and fulfilled in his love.
He was the first to speak, and she felt his breath on her cheek as he pronounced the words she could not hear often enough.
“Elizabeth, I love you.”
Chapter 20
THERE WAS NO DOUBT IN Jane’s mind as to the outcome of Darcy’s interview with Elizabeth. They were two people who belonged together, and they had each been taught that by hard-learned lessons. When she saw them approach the house, they were walking very close together and making no effort to hide the fact that they were holding each other’s hand. When they caught a glimpse of her, they did not separate or shy away from each other. Jane was pleased. She would allow any liberties between her sister and her husband’s friend that were required to make them happy.
Jane met the couple in the entryway. Elizabeth rushed to her and embraced her. “Mr. Darcy has asked me to marry him, and I have accepted.”
Darcy walked up to Jane to receive her congratulations, and all three went into the drawing room. Darcy and Elizabeth sat together on one sofa while Jane sat on a chair opposite them. Jane began their conversation after calling for tea. “When will you marry? Please tell me all the details.”
“We will marry as soon as possible, Mrs. Bingley. I will go to London to procure a license for us.”
“We will marry just as soon as we have the license,” added Elizabeth.
“What about Mama? She will have no time to arrange for the wedding.”
“Mama will have to be understanding. Brides must be given a great deal of latitude on such matters, you know.” She paused for a moment. “I have something I would ask of you, Jane.”
“Of course, you know I will do anything for you.”
“I want to accompany Mr. Darcy to London. He must be gone a few days, and I cannot bear to be away from him.”
Jane smiled at her. “I will be happy to go to London with you. Of course you want to be with Mr. Darcy. Mr. Bingley will accompany us.”
“In that case, Mrs. Bingley, I invite you all to stay with me at my house in Town. There is plenty of room, and we shall all be very comfortable.”
“Thank you, Fitzwilliam. Thank you, Jane.”
“I will leave you two alone while I speak with Charles.”
* * * * *
ELIZABETH CROSSED THE ROOM TO the window and looked out over the lawn. Netherfield had never looked so beautiful, yet it was no different than yesterday. She knew her outlook was forever changed because she was certain of Darcy’s love. She could barely remember the hurt she had felt the day before. He had extinguished all the pain and loneliness and had filled her heart with a sense of love and belonging. She reached out her hand to him, inviting him to come to her. She bit her lip as she watched him approach. He did not move with haste, but with deliberate, determined steps, his eyes not leaving hers.
He took her in his arms and softly whispered her name. She returned his embrace, feeling confident in his love and affection. He kissed her in such a way that she could not mistake his feelings for her. Her whole body was heated by his touch. She felt her breath begin to fail her.
“Thank you for coming back.”
* * * * *
“DARCY, YOU ARE VERY WELCOME to Netherfield,” said Bingley.
“Thank you for your invitation.”
Elizabeth looked expectantly at her sister. “Have you told him, Jane?”
“Told me what?” inquired Bingley with smile that indicated his good knowledge.
“Mr. Darcy and I are to be married.” She did not fear his disapprobation. It was through his means that she and Darcy had been reunited.
“I knew it would happen. I knew you two could not, should not, stay apart.”
“Mr. Darcy, we have spoken about it, and Charles and I are very happy to go to London with you. All that remains is for you to tell us when you would like to leave.”
“If possible, I should like to leave in the morning.”
Elizabeth looked at him with an expression of happiness. Her every wish was being fulfilled. Darcy had returned, they were to be married, and with Jane’s help, they would not be separated. It now struck her that her new and sudden engagement to Darcy, following so soon upon the heels of the end of her very public engagement to Mr. Grinly, would appear strange to the community of Meryton. People might wonder about their motives for marrying. They might speculate as to why Mr. Grinly had left so suddenly. Her removal to London with Mr. Darcy would not be looked upon with favor, and her reputation would suffer as a result. It did pain her to some degree, but it did not overcome the desire she had to be with Mr. Darcy nor her resolution to marry him.
* * * * *
AFTER A LIGHT DINNER, THE friends spent a companionable evening together. Darcy related to Bingley how he had arrived at Netherfield and had been sent by Mrs. Bingley to seek Elizabeth by the stream. While not disclosin
g the substance of their conversation, he did make Bingley understand that she had accepted his immediate proposal of marriage and that the purpose of their trip to London was to obtain a special license so they could marry as soon as possible.
“Elizabeth,” said Mr. Bingley, “I suppose your mother is quite happy in the knowledge that another of her daughters will be well settled.”
“Sadly, my mother does not yet know her own happiness and probably will not know it for some time. She has not forgiven me for ending my engagement to Mr. Grinly, and I have been banished from her presence.”
“Elizabeth, is there anything I can do to help?”
“You can do nothing, Fitzwilliam. You have made me happy, and that is all I care about.”
“But your mother?”
“She will learn soon enough of our engagement and then perhaps she will forgive me. I do not trouble myself over it, and I pray that you will not, either.”
* * * * *
AFTER THE SERVANTS HAD REMOVED the tea service, Jane announced that she would be retiring for the night. She was certain Elizabeth would like some privacy with Mr. Darcy, and knew she would enjoy the same with her husband. Jane stepped over to Elizabeth and embraced her. “I am happy for you! He loves you.”
“I know he does. Thank you for everything.”
The sisters separated and Mr. Bingley led his wife from the room.
* * * * *
ELIZABETH WAS QUITE SURPRISED AT the nervous feelings she experienced upon being left alone with Mr. Darcy. She felt it incumbent on her to speak.
“I . . . ”
“Well . . . ”
They laughed at the coincidence, and hearing Darcy’s deep voice removed Elizabeth’s feelings of discomfort.
“Pray, continue, Fitzwilliam.”
He shook his head and smiled at her. “Today has been an astonishing day. I traveled from London this morning with a great deal of anticipation at seeing you again, hoping that you still loved me. In the afternoon, you bestowed on me your hand and gave me your love. Now it is the evening and propriety dictates that we separate for the night, yet I do not want to be without you.”
“Well, there is certainly no cause for rushing away, is there?” Elizabeth motioned to the seat next to her on a sofa.
Darcy sat down with her, took her hand, and held it with both of his. “Because of you, my heart is made whole. All the pain and anguish of these past weeks is gone. I can scarcely remember it. I have always loved you, even when I thought I should not. I am so happy to be with you now, just sitting and talking.” He paused for a moment, and then continued. “Soon after we marry, I would like to take you to Pemberley. I cannot wait until I can take you home.”
“That sounds wonderful.”
“I am sure we will live happily at Pemberley, and perhaps we will not be alone. I mean, I hope we are blessed with children.”
Elizabeth laughed. “Yes, Fitzwilliam, I would like that very much.”
Observing Elizabeth struggling to hide a yawn, Darcy helped her to her feet. “I think it is time for us to say goodnight, my love.”
“Oh, but I do not want to.”
“I am not going anywhere without you. I will be here in the morning when you wake. You must rest for our journey tomorrow.”
“Yes, of course, you are right.”
Darcy led her through the hall and to the staircase. “You can have no idea how many times I mounted these stairs in anticipation of seeing you. For the first time, I will climb them with you.” He put one arm around her waist and held her hand with the other. They ascended the stairs in silence.
They arrived at the door of her bedchamber. “May I kiss you good night, fair lady?”
“I am yours, dear sir.”
Their lips touched softly. Elizabeth had been longing for the moment when he would touch her again, and she was not disappointed. She was being held by the man she loved, and as his hands explored her curves and his lips warmed hers, she wished she could remain in his arms forever. She knew that she had attained the happiness she had sought her whole life.
* * * * *
EARLY THE NEXT MORNING, MR. Darcy, Mr. and Mrs. Bingley, and Elizabeth set off in Mr. Bingley’s carriage. Mr. Darcy’s unoccupied conveyance followed behind. Jane had prepared a basket of fruit and bread with which to make their journey more comfortable, and they found no reason to stop along the way but to change horses.
Elizabeth was nearly bursting with excitement. She took great pleasure in the novelty of her trip, beyond the immediate enjoyment of being with Jane, Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy. She and Darcy were well beyond the immediate embarrassment of their new situation, and they were not ashamed of showing their affection for each other in the presence of the Bingleys. Sitting beside each other in the carriage, he held her hand and softly caressed her fingers.
The conversation died away as the coach entered the noise and bustle of London. Elizabeth was astonished at the section of Town in which she found herself. The homes were magnificent. Although she had known by general report that Darcy was rich and knew from his description of Pemberley that it was a fine estate, the magnitude of his wealth was evident when they stopped in front of the Darcy townhouse.
Georgiana came to the entryway when she heard her brother’s voice. She had known Mr. Bingley for a long time, but she did not know the two young ladies. “Fitzwilliam, once again you have surprised me. I did not know you were coming back so soon.”
“I did not realize that my business would be concluded so quickly or in so happy a manner.” Darcy began the introductions. “Mrs. Bingley, Miss Bennet, this is my sister, Georgiana.”
“Mrs. Bingley,” said Georgiana, “please accept my congratulations on your marriage. I have known your husband for much of my life, and you could not have chosen a better man.”
“Thank you, Miss Darcy. I do love him dearly.”
“Miss Bennet, my brother has spoken very highly of you. I am so happy to make your acquaintance.”
Darcy ushered the ladies into the drawing room. Jane was seated with Bingley on a sofa. Elizabeth moved to the far side of the room and placed herself opposite Georgiana and Darcy.
Georgiana was very pleased finally to meet Miss Bennet. She knew her brother loved her and had gone to Hertfordshire to win her hand in marriage. That he could accomplish this task so quickly was reassuring to Georgiana, as it spoke volumes about Miss Bennet’s attachment to her brother. She was as beautiful as her brother described and seemed just as amiable as she had hoped. She was delighted with Elizabeth and now strove to make her feel more comfortable and at home. Indeed, Georgiana thought, it would very soon be her home.
Elizabeth began the conversation. “Miss Darcy, your brother has told me about Pemberley. It must be a beautiful place.”
“It is. Perhaps someday you can visit us there. There is no place I would rather be. Unfortunately, I must remain in Town to pursue my education. I go there only for the summer months.”
“That must make it all the more special for you. I understand that you play the pianoforte very well.”
“I do like to play, but I do not play very well. My brother tells me that you sing and play.”
“A little, but I would so much like to hear you perform. Will you, while I am here?”
Georgiana seemed flattered by the attention. “If you like.”
“Miss Darcy,” said Jane, “you must insist that my sister play for you. She is much more accomplished than the world is generally aware.”
“Then I will insist. Thank you for the hint. Miss Bennet, I am so happy that you are here!”
Elizabeth was a little surprised at this admission, but was pleased with the warmth of the young lady’s welcome. She would soon be her sister and was eager to meet with her approval.
Unable to wait any longer, Mr. Darcy stood. “Please, excuse me. I have urgent business to which I must attend immediately.”
Bingley arose also. “Darcy, may I be of any service to you?”
Darcy crossed the room to where Elizabeth sat. “I will go now to apply for the license. Would you like to accompany me?”
She hesitated in her response. She wanted to go with hi, but felt that perhaps it would be inappropriate, and under no circumstances did she want to do anything that might embarrass him. She replied in a hushed voice. “You have been very generous to indulge me by bringing me to London with you, for which I am very grateful. I do believe, though, that it would be best for you to attend to these affairs alone. How long will you be away?”
“I will be home before dinner, my love.”
“Let me walk with you to the door, sir.”
* * * * *
IN THE ENTRYWAY, ELIZABETH AND Mr. Darcy found themselves quite alone, and he took advantage of it by taking her firmly into his arms. She pressed herself against him and gloried in the feeling of love that his embrace afforded her.
With his lips nearly touching hers, he whispered, “I will attend to this as quickly as I can. I love you.”
His kiss was surety for its truth. She delighted in the warmth of his lips, and he savored the fullness of hers. With closed eyes, her whole body was attuned to the sensations he was creating inside her. She felt loved, truly loved and wanted.
When his lips left hers, she wanted to tell him that she loved him, but could not speak. Without another word between them, and with only a parting glance, he slipped out of her arms and left the house.
Elizabeth took a step forward to occupy the space he had just vacated and hugged herself, refusing to surrender the memory of the tender feelings of being held by him.
* * * * *
DARCY DID NOT HAVE MUCH experience in being away from Elizabeth since their engagement, and as he left his house, what would be their first home, he realized how much he depended on her. Loving her so fully and completely, and similarly being loved by her, were feelings of a nature he had never experienced. The door of his carriage had not closed before his heart suffered from being out of her presence.