BE MY BRAYSHAW

by Meagan Brandy

  I reach for him, but he presses his upper body into mine more, locking my hands against the mattress, his fingers interlacing and squeezing me tight as my walls clench around him.

  He groans, whispering words I can’t make out into my skin, and I break out in goosebumps.

  His fingers hook inside me, and he drags his lips to my ear. Suddenly his thumb is swirling along my clit and my back arches right as he whispers, “Come.”

  I do.

  My body quakes against his, my fingers trying to suck him in farther.

  He waits for me to ride it out, for my breathing to settle and then he sighs, shifting us both so once again we’re on our sides.

  Within minutes his eyes begin to close, and only then do I realize his hold on my hair never wavered, never loosened or let go, instead burying deeper as he falls asleep at my side.

  I try not to wonder what it means, but sleep becomes the enemy.

  And in the back of my mind, I know it won’t be the only one.

  Chapter 24

  Captain

  We needed a day away after how last weekend played out. My mind has been so heavy I could hardly focus in school, let alone at night when all I had was time to think.

  This morning was the first I felt calm, and I knew instantly what I wanted to do.

  I needed another chance at a first with my daughter, since our first Easter, unbeknownst to her, was tainted.

  So, we ditched school and loaded up in my SUV and came to our family cabin in the woods.

  It’s decades old but has been kept fresh and refurbished on the inside.

  It sits high in the mountains, other mounds of rock and hillside surrounding it with a creek running through.

  There are several others surrounding it, all owned by other students at Brayshaw High, and even a few from Graven from back when they weren’t the enemy, way before our time.

  It’s a fun party spot for all the teenagers to come and get away from the city, but on weekends like this, when no one else is around, it’s peaceful, nothing but the sound of birds and water against rocks to be heard.

  That and the echoes of Zoey’s laughter as Maddoc helps her try and climb a tree.

  “Daddy look at me!” She smiles, waving. “I’m waaaay up!”

  Maddoc is holding her up completely, she only has a foot and single hand touching the oak but to her, she’s climbed a tree.

  I smile, opening the lid to the barbecue. “Dang, Zo, watch out for chipmunks way up there!” I tease her.

  She turns her attention back to Maddoc as Raven steps up beside me, eyeing the hot links on the grill.

  “I’m so starved.” She eyes them.

  “You’re always starved.”

  She laughs, bumping my shoulder, but then she grows quiet a moment. “Not to cloud your happy mood, but... do you ever wonder what it was like for her?”

  She doesn’t say her name, but we both know she means Mallory.

  I frown at the food in front of me, flipping over the meat. “Might make me shitty to admit, but I hadn’t. Not once until I saw some things change in you.”

  “Yeah,” she whispers. “Shitty you couldn’t be a part of it in some way. I hate her for you, but I imagine your hate isn’t so simple.”

  She looks up at me, but it takes me a second to meet her eyes, allowing her to witness the struggle in my own.

  “Nah, Raven. It’s not.”

  “’Sup, RaeRae.” Royce is suddenly beside her, throwing an arm over her shoulder as he shouts. “Wanna go play at the Graven cabin again, Madman?”

  Maddoc’s head snaps our way, and he mouths ‘fuck you’ while flipping him off.

  Royce laughs, kisses her temple, and walks away. “Going to find that blonde who ran off the second we got out here.”

  “She went up the hill!” Raven shouts.

  And off he goes.

  To find my blonde.

  A heavy sense of unease fills my veins at the thought.

  Damn it.

  Victoria

  With a deep breath, I close my eyes and wrap my palm around the spiked greenery, exhaling when warm liquid glides along my skin, dripping down my forearms in slow, heated trails.

  “The fuck!” is shouted and my eyes fly open to find Royce a few feet in front of me, his eyes wide, yet somehow still he scowls.

  “I’m fine.”

  “Let go.”

  “I will.”

  “Now!” he snaps.

  My hands tighten, driving the thorns deeper before I finally let go, looking to the heavy strips of red coating my tan skin.

  He grips my wrists, pulling each hand to his face to inspect the damage, but all he gets are smears of the mess I made.

  “It’s just a little paint.”

  “Paint?” he deadpans, dropping my hands, and his eyes fly to mine. “Are you for real some secret psycho?”

  A laugh flies from me, and I shake my head.

  He already knows blood is a wicked tool meant to paint a picture of pain, revenge and hate, of death.

  I, for one, have never been a fan of art.

  Royce tugs the shirt over his head, patting at my hands until the tiny holes are visible.

  “Fucked yourself up pretty good here.”

  “Eh, it’ll only sting for a couple hours.”

  He scoffs, sitting on a large boulder to the right.

  He crosses his arms, staring at me. “You wanna tell me why you’re uglying up your hands?”

  “Depends.”

  “On what?”

  “You wanna tell me what you’re trying to pull behind your brothers’ backs?”

  His glare is instant. “Fuck’s that mean?”

  “Come on, Royce. We just went over this...” I tip my head back and forth, teasingly. “Secrets are my thing, remember?”

  His eyes narrow, and he licks his lips, kicking his feet out. “So it’s not some kinda ‘this person has a big mouth and the word spread to me’ shit? You legit fuckin’ see what others don’t?”

  “It’s almost a curse.” I shrug. “Makes me question everyone and everything. Most people don’t make random moves, you know? Especially in worlds like the ones we live in. I mean shit, you guys have five other families, four now that the Gravens are out, that run towns just like yours. There’re secrets everywhere and always someone scheming. Nobody wants a seat at the bottom, they want to climb that invisible ladder to the top.”

  “I’m not scheming,” he rushes out.

  I smirk, bringing my eyes to his as I push off the rock. “I know.”

  I walk by and the bushes rustle behind me, alerting me he’s done the same.

  “Hold up, how do you know?” he asks, jumping beside me and holding the branches out of the way so we can make the small descent to the cabins.

  “You’ve spent a lot of time on your phone lately, and any time I pass your room with you inside, you have your computer out.”

  “So fuckin’ what, maybe I’m watchin’ porn?”

  I laugh. “Maybe… but I’ve also seen you chatting with Maybell.”

  “And? She’s basically my fuckin’ mom. That don’t mean shit.”

  I nod, stepping onto the little bridge that carries us across the tiny stream below. “True.”

  “VicVee!” he snaps.

  I turn to him with a grin. “You’re tailing someone, and not someone the boys are aware of because you’re not using your main PI. I also know you took a little road trip with Mac right after Raven and Maddoc got married, but it wasn’t to see the person you’re having watched. You have a master plan that’s about to be put into motion, but it’s a self-serving agenda, and before you get all mad and snap at me, there is nothing wrong with that when it doesn’t hurt your family none.”

  Royce gapes at me. “Mother of god damn, VicVee, that’s some scary shit right there.” He chuckles lightly, but then he leans forward, his mask slipping over his eyes, darkness taking over. “Say a word and I’ll...”

  His threat never follows.<
br />
  He gauges me and when he nods, I decide he might just trust that I won’t.

  But I can’t be too sure.

  He moves by me, but before I can turn to follow, a warm body is behind me, locking me against the railing.

  Captain’s arms come around me, loosely holding me to him as his head falls to my shoulder, seeking out the skin of my collarbone.

  He plants a small kiss there, and he doesn’t lift from the spot.

  He hugs me to him, so I allow my body to relax, giving him the weight of mine, and he accepts it with a heavy inhale.

  We stand there, my eyes closed as I think his are too, listening to the creek below us, neither of us letting go until somewhere behind us, Zoey calls for her dad.

  That night, Captain lays blanket after blanket on the balcony and pulls me outside with him.

  He turns off all the lights, nothing but the stars above us to light the area, and settles into the pallet, tugging me down beside him.

  We lie there, staring up at the sky until we fall asleep, and in the morning we pack up and head back to the unknown reality awaiting us.

  Chapter 25

  Victoria

  “And that right there, is the best lasagna you’ll ever eat in your life, Zoey Bear.” Royce winks at her, picking up his and Raven’s empty plates on his way to the kitchen.

  Zoey laughs, licking her fork, little feet swinging beneath the seat.

  The others roll their eyes playfully, and when I look to Captain with a grin, I find his frown focused on the screen of his phone.

  Before I frown myself, I clean my mess and step out onto the porch for some fresh air. Raven follows.

  She drops beside me, pulling a blanket over her legs.

  I look to her stomach, which seems to be growing a little more by the day.

  She catches me, and the side grin takes over her face. “There’s a human inside me, weird shit, right?”

  I chuckle, but it dies off on a sigh. “Yeah. It’s a crazy process.”

  “How much do you know about the process, Vee?” she asks instantly, her eyes sliding back to mine.

  I glance across the yard. “Too much, Rae, can we leave it at that?”

  “For now.” She frowns. “Is he okay?”

  My eyes fly to hers. “How would I know?”

  “He spends his nights with you Victoria.”

  “Does he?”

  Restless thoughts spin in my head as for the millionth time I try to weigh the events of the last few weeks.

  Is he with me when he’s in my bed?

  Raven glares, but it’s not for me, and then the front door opens and closes, and Captain barrels down the steps.

  “Pacman,” she calls.

  He skids to a stop, whipping around with his phone in his hand.

  His eyes fly between us.

  “I’ll be back,” he says, quickly looking away. “Zoey’s in the media room with Dad and Royce.”

  “Where are you going?” Raven asks.

  “To grab somethin’.”

  Only when his taillights disappear does she turn to me with a scowl. “Why do I get the feeling he just lied to me?”

  “I think he did.”

  “Maybe it’s because you’re right here.”

  A laugh bubbles from me and she joins in, dropping her head back on the seat.

  “Yeah, Raven.” I sigh. “Maybe.”

  It doesn’t take long for Maddoc to come for his girl, so I follow them inside and up the stairs.

  The two continue down the long hallway, following Royce and Zoey’s laughter into the media room while I disappear into mine.

  I must have fallen asleep, because I’m woken hours later when Captain comes inside my room.

  He kneels at the side of my bed.

  “You awake?” he whispers.

  “I am.”

  “Go on a drive with me.”

  My brows pull in, but I nod, climb from my bed, slip my shoes on and walk over to where he now waits for me.

  He holds my eyes a long moment, and then takes the hoodie from around his arm, pulling it over my head. It swallows me whole, of course, but I don’t care.

  Captain inhales, long and deep, his hands coming up and pushing the hood down, his fingers slipping around my neck to free my hair from beneath the expensive cotton. He leans in, skimming his lips along my cheek, kissing where my jawbone meets my neck.

  My eyes close, my palms lifting to his chest and his join.

  He holds my hands a long moment before dropping one and tugging me along until we’re out the front door and he has the passenger one open for me to climb inside.

  We drive in comfortable silence for hours, going nowhere, simply around the town and up and down the country roads on the outside of it, his hand latched tight with mine the entire way.

  Only when the moon is ready to rest does he pull down the long dirt road to the mansion.

  Inside the house, he pauses in the hall near his door.

  Once again, he pulls me to him, his eyes a deeper blue, the green a thin hidden ring around them, and he leans in, kissing the same spot as earlier before he lets me go, stepping into the bathroom.

  I stand there, listening as the shower is turned on, the soft vibration of the glass door opening and closing.

  Before I can stop myself, I’m in his bedroom, standing right in front of his nightstand.

  My fingers graze along the brass handle of the drawer, readying to open it and pull out the journal I know sits inside, but then his phone vibrates right on top, the screen lighting the still dark room with a message not meant for me to see, from a name I wish I didn’t.

  My Mallory: when?

  No.

  My stomach bottoms out, dread digging deep within my chest and knocking me back.

  I fall onto his mattress as the inevitable coils in my gut, stripping me of what I thought was our start.

  But here he was, reaching for a completely new one.

  I push my feet into my shoes, bending to pull the back up over my heel when Raven comes around the corner fanning herself. “Where are you going?”

  “To get some air,” I tell her as I walk out, shutting the door behind me and start down the dirt road toward the Bray houses.

  The girls are scattered around, coming in and out, as are the boys from their house, all getting their daily required chores completed.

  “Need a hand?”

  Nira, turns around, and shrugs, getting back to pulling the weeds. I drop to my knees beside her, digging right into the dirt, and damn if the feel of the cooled soil doesn’t calm me.

  Nira laughs. “You want some gloves?”

  She holds out a box, but I shake my head.

  “I’m good.”

  “Right,” she scoffs. “If you were good, you wouldn’t be spending your Saturday morning on your knees in the dirt at the group home you used to live in when you now live with a bunch of rich kids in a fancy-ass mansion.”

  “Meh.” I shrug. “It’s not that fancy.”

  When I look up, we both laugh.

  “For real, though. If you don’t want people to think you’re miserable, maybe don’t look like you are.” Her eyes lift to the messy ball on my head held back by a green bandana. “And try brushing your hair.”

  I fight a grin. “Shut up or you can do this by yourself.”

  “I don’t need your help.”

  “No, but I have a joint we can smoke once your chores are done.”

  She looks up. “Okay, you get the right side; I’ll get the left.”

  I smirk. “Deal.”

  We’re done quick, and hiding out on the opposite side of the house, smoking.

  “So I ran into Mike,” she says casually as she takes a hit, missing the way my muscles lock.

  “Oh yeah,” I spin the bandana around my wrist. “When?”

  “Couple days ago. I went into the Chinese place downtown to use the restroom, and when I was coming out, he was walking in.”

  He hates
Chinese food.

  He followed her there.

  “What’d he say?”

  “Asked how I was, how it was going at the house, and about you, duh.”

  I nod, rubbing my lips together. “What’d you tell him?”

  “That if he was smart, he wouldn’t go around asking about Captain Brayshaw’s newest Bray Girl.” She shrugs, passing me the joint.

  Bet he just loved hearing that.

  “He just laughed,” she continues. “Saw him leave a few minutes later. He got a new car.”

  My brows pull and I look to her. “Yeah?”

  She nods. “Must have found himself a nice gig wherever it is he took off to. That sucker couldn’t have been cheap.”

  I nod, but don’t comment.

  What are you up to, Mike?

  Nira takes one more hit and passes it back again, slowly pushing to her feet. “I’ve got to take a shower before the rest of the girls get done with their chores and hog the hot water. See you around.”

  Just like that, the other half of the day is left for me and my jumbled mind.

  I make my way around the front of the group home, glancing from the girls’ to the boys’ home just across from it, and out at the street ahead.

  Fuck it.

  I drop onto the grass where I stand and pull my phone out, flipping it around in my hand.

  I take a deep breath, glaring at the screen.

  I decide to try Maria again, but again there is no answer and her mailbox is full. It’s annoying, and to be honest I don’t even know why I keep trying, if she doesn’t want to talk, that’s fine. I shouldn’t care.

  I don’t care.

  But why the fuck can’t she answer?

  What if it was about Zoey?

  Where’s Captain?

  And why the fuck is Mike still here and how the hell did he buy a new car?

  I scoff at myself.

  He’s here because he hasn’t had a chance to say bye to me yet.

  Maybe I should go find him?

  Maybe I’m just bored out of my mind.

  “What are you doin’, girl?”

  My shoulders fall, a sigh leaving me as I glance over my shoulder, shielding my eyes to see beyond the sun. Maybell comes down the steps, a town car pulling in in perfect timing with her feet hitting the walkway.