Tracie Peterson - [Desert Roses 01]
Page 22
“Not everyone, Miss Winthrop. But even so, going to church isn’t enough. It’s not about being religious, either.”
“Then what?”
He kicked at the dirt and chose his words carefully. “It’s about putting your trust in God. It’s about letting Him take control—putting the past behind you and seeking a newness in Him.”
Several guests approached, talking in animated conversation about the death of the president. Luke stepped aside in order for them to pass by. He tipped his hat at the ladies and received their nods, while the men in the party did likewise for Valerie Winthrop. Luke was surprised to watch her acknowledge them briefly, then turn away. Gone was any hint of a desire to flirt and be the center of attention. In fact, if Luke hadn’t known better, he’d have believed she would just as soon have been swallowed up by the earth.
Once the visitors had passed, Valerie let out a long breath. Luke could see she was relaxed to be once again alone with him. What did it all mean?
“Can God care about someone like me, Luke?” she asked, forgetting her earlier formality of calling him Mr. Toland.
“Of course He can. You aren’t the worst sinner to ever walk the earth, neither are you the least. We’re all just sinners to God, and He deals with each one of us as an individual child.”
“Yes, but I’ve done things in my life, things that will have lasting consequence.” Her lower lip quivered and tears came to her eyes. “You know how I’ve acted. Does God know too?”
Luke felt sorry for the lost woman. “He does, Miss Winthrop. He knows how you’ve acted and He knew how you would need Him. He knew it long before you were even born.”
“That’s hard to believe.” “But true.”
She looked him square in the face. “But aren’t there times when you feel lonely? When you feel like the rest of the world has deserted you and you’re all alone?”
At one time Luke might have perceived such questions as a come-on, but not now. He realized she was searching, nearly crying out for understanding.
“I used to feel that way. I felt like I was all alone after my mother died. I didn’t understand why God would take away someone I needed and loved. But you know, over the years, now that I’ve put things right between God and me, I don’t feel that way. I might feel a sense of being by myself and maybe want to be with other people, but I’m never lonely. I know God is there for me. I know He’s walking right beside me.”
“But there are so many people I’ve wronged. You included.” Luke smiled and pushed back his hat. “I forgive you.” “You do?” she questioned. Her tone was one of disbelief. “I do,” Luke assured. “But I lied to your . . . to Miss Keegan. I made her believe . . .”
“I already know about all of that,” Luke admitted. “And I still forgive you.”
She looked at him with an expression of wonder. “And God does the same thing?”
“When you ask Him to, and you’re truly sorry, then God forgives you. You can ask Him to help you not make the same mistakes again.”
Additional groups of tourists were on the lawn now, some heading down the path toward them. Valerie grew noticeably uncomfortable, and Luke couldn’t help but glance over his shoulder to note Joel Harper was heading down the rim path toward the Lookout studios.
“I have to go,” she whispered. She moved toward the hotel. “Sure.” Luke didn’t try to stop her. “I’ll be praying for you, Miss Winthrop.”
She stopped and turned around at this. “Would you, please? Will you truly pray for me?”
Luke felt awful inside at the realization that he should have thought of this a whole lot earlier. “Of course I will. Alex will too.”
Valerie bit her lip and nodded. “Thank you.” She started to turn, then surprised Luke by coming back to him. “Might I further impose?”
“I suppose that depends on what you need.” He smiled, trying to appear lighthearted about the whole thing.
“Would you mind meeting me this evening? I’d like to talk to you more about these God matters.”
Luke shook his head. “I don’t think it would be appropriate for us to meet alone.”
Valerie nodded. “I wasn’t suggesting that. I’m not entirely sure what my father plans. We were to head home today, but the trains are booked. We can’t head out until tomorrow morning. With the cancellation of the gala, there doesn’t seem to be much purpose in continuing our stay. At least that’s what he and I decided this morning. Hopefully Mr. Harper hasn’t changed Daddy’s mind. I think it would be in the poorest of taste if we were to continue campaigning in the wake of the current president’s death.”
“I can see what you mean.” “Anyway, if there is to be some sort of gathering, I’ll send you word. I’d like you to be my guest. Otherwise, let’s simply meet after supper in the lobby. There should be plenty of people there.”
“All right,” he said, hoping it was the right thing to do. “Thank you.”
She seems sincere enough, Luke thought. He watched her enter the hotel quickly and disappear from sight. Lord, I don’t know what’s gotten into her, but I’m sure it’s for her good. Let her understand the truth about you. Let her desire to know you more. His prayer seemed such a pittance. I should have been praying for her all along. Instead of being angry with her or worried about my relationship with Alex, I should have concerned myself with Miss Winthrop’s eternal soul.
Realizing he’d forgotten his meeting with the rangers, Luke refocused his energies. He would continue to pray for Miss Winthrop, but for now he needed to speak with the authorities and see what could be done to figure out the murder of Rufus Keegan and what, if anything, Joel Harper might have had to do with it. If the man had a hand in killing the president of the United States, surely he’d have no problem at all in eliminating a man such as Keegan.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
“Mother, you must tell them what you know. If not them, then tell me and I’ll tell them,” Alex pleaded. “You can’t let the responsible party get away with murdering Father.” Alex had just been given the word that the authorities were going to take her mother to Williams and formally charge her with the murder of Rufus Keegan. The fact that they were giving up on the investigation simply because there were no other viable options or suspects was tearing Alex apart.
“You don’t know what you’re asking, Alexandria,” her mother replied.
Alex felt only a marginal sense of achievement. At least her mother hadn’t dismissed the matter completely.
“I know they’re talking about moving you to the jail in Williams. You’re the prime suspect and they mean to charge you with Father’s murder if you can’t prove otherwise.”
Alex took ahold of her mother’s hand. “Please, Mama, don’t let them send you to jail for something I know you didn’t do. If Joel Harper is responsible for this, then you must tell the authorities. If he’s threatened you or me, you must ignore it and let the law deal with him.”
Her mother shook her head and looked down at the floor. “Mr. Harper is in no way to blame for what happened.”
“How can you be sure? If it was another man who pushed Father, then perhaps Mr. Harper hired it done. The man is ruthless. He would stop at nothing to see his precious campaign won.”
“It wasn’t Mr. Harper’s doing,” her mother insisted. “Please, just let it be.”
Alex stepped away from her mother and tried to figure another path of reasoning. “There was someone else there that night, wasn’t there? You weren’t alone.”
Her mother said nothing but turned uncomfortably, glancing at the door. The ranger had agreed to wait outside while they talked, but his presence was very evident.
Determined to have an answer, Alex confronted her mother. “Who are you protecting?” Alex questioned.
Katherine Keegan put her hand to her mouth as if to keep the words from flowing out. Alex’s knees trembled. Her mother really was protecting someone. All this time, Alex had only guessed that it could be one of many possibilities
. She feared that her mother had been threatened and that this was the reason for her silence.
“Mother, please.”
Her mother lowered her hands, twisting them together anxiously. “I can’t. Now that you’ve guessed this much, please understand. I can’t say anything more.”
Alex walked the rocky path back to El Tovar, more frustrated and worried than ever. Her mother was protecting someone, but whom? Why would her mother be willing to go to jail for a murderer? There were few people—Luke and Clancy, Mrs. Godfrey, Michaela, and a few other Harvey Girls—who showed her mother the slightest bit of respect or courtesy. It just didn’t make sense for her mother’s loyalty to run so deep. Alex knew she wouldn’t rest until the truth came out for everyone to see.
Then Alex began to let her imagination run wild, and for just a moment Luke’s image came to mind. Was her mother protecting him? Could it be possible he had taken Alex’s frustrations and pain and decided to put an end to her father’s life?
“No,” she said, shaking her head vigorously as she entered the kitchen.
“What did you say?” Michaela questioned.
Alex looked up and realized several Harvey Girls as well as two of the kitchen staff were watching her as if she were about to impart some great truth to them.
“Nothing. I’m just muttering to myself.” “Well, when you get done with your own company,” Michaela teased, “Mrs. Godfrey has asked to see you in her office.”
Alex nodded and took off down the hall to see what Mrs. Godfrey required. Knocking on the open door, Alex peeked her head inside. “You wanted to see me?”
Mrs. Godfrey nodded. “Come in and close the door.” Alex eyed her curiously for a moment, then nodded. Closing the door behind her, Alex walked to the desk. “What’s this all about?”
Mrs. Godfrey handed her an envelope. “Senator Winthrop brought this by earlier.”
Alex took the envelope and opened it. “Oh my.” She counted at least a hundred dollars more than she’d been promised from the Winthrop group. “What’s this all about?”
“The senator praised your work, sympathized with your circumstances, and said he wanted you to have this. He was very complimentary and said that in spite of knowing you often faced difficulty with his group, you were the epitome of graciousness and charm.”
Alex sat down opposite Mrs. Godfrey and shook her head. “I’ve never hated working with a group of people more than I have the Winthrops. It was only the love of God that kept me on the job.”
“Perhaps the senator understood your misery.” “Maybe. I don’t know that he could really focus on anything other than his campaign and his plans for the presidency.”
“People are often deluded, blinded even, by the goals they set,” Mrs. Godfrey said in agreement.
The words went straight to Alex’s heart. “I know I’ve been guilty of that, but hopefully no more.”
“Alex, I wanted to talk to you without anyone else around. I know you’re struggling with a great many issues right now. I realize there is pressure to find out exactly what happened that night with your father. Given this and everything else, I feel I must require you to take a few days off. I know you wanted to keep working. I know, too, that there was no real love lost between you and your father, but I see a weariness in you—a state of mind that would benefit from rest.”
Alex eased back in the chair and considered Mrs. Godfrey’s words. “I suppose you would know better than I would.” The idea of a rest didn’t seem so bad. “I thought keeping busy would help, but it hasn’t.”
“I presumed as much. Do you feel like talking about it?” Alex appreciated her motherly concern. “I’ve tried to talk with my mother, but she’s not of a mind to listen right now.”
Mrs. Godfrey nodded, her tightly curled gray hair barely moving with the motion. “She’s no doubt consumed with her own emotions. I’d like to help if I can. You girls are like daughters to me. I never had children, and after my husband passed on, I always longed for a daughter to give me companionship. Now I have a dozen or more at times and I find I love the camaraderie.”
Alex smiled. “You’ve been a good friend to all of us. And believe me, if I knew how to put my feelings into words, I would. But I find myself a mix of emotions—from guilt to frustration to sorrow.”
Mrs. Godfrey’s sympathetic expression put Alex at ease. Where her mother had clearly closed the door to communication, Mrs. Godfrey seemed eager to help. “I’ve been praying for your peace of mind. I know that your father was less than helpful in your life. I know he grieved you on many occasions. But he’s gone now. He can’t hurt you anymore.”
“But that’s just it. He is hurting me. His death is unresolved and my mother stands at the center of controversy once again. It’s almost as if he’s still determined to torment and torture her further.”
“Have you spoken with your mother about what happened?”
Alex sighed and cast her gaze to the ceiling. “I’ve asked, I’ve cajoled, I’ve begged, and I’ve pleaded. She won’t talk to me about what happened. She knows full well what occurred. Of this, I’m convinced.
“We were planning Father’s funeral this morning and I tried to reason with her. They’ll take her to jail in Williams if they can’t find any conclusive proof to show she’s not responsible for this.” Alex brushed aside the tears that came unbidden. “She’s going to go to jail, Mrs. Godfrey. And all because she’s protecting someone else.”
“But who?” “That’s just it. I have no idea.” Alex met her supervisor’s gaze. “I have no idea and because of that, I am helpless. Besides those involved, God alone knows what happened that night. And He sure isn’t saying a word about it to me.”
“I understand. Just know that I’m here to talk to,” Mrs. Godfrey encouraged. “I care a great deal about you, Alex. I know your days here are probably numbered. Your mother will need you now, no matter the outcome of this matter. You’ll go your way . . . but just know how much I care.”
Alex smiled in spite of her tears. “I do know, and I very much appreciate it.”
That evening, Alex milled about the grounds, her spirit restless in her idleness. She’d worked so hard over the past four years, she’d scarcely taken time for herself. There were occasional outings with Luke or some of the other girls, along with trips home from time to time, but over all, she’d chosen to work.
“I worked because I wanted to free my mother from her misery, and now . . .” She let the words trail off as she suddenly realized she was speaking them aloud. “My goal blinded me to so much.”
Looking out over the canyon, Alex wondered silently about the days to come. Everyone here at the canyon, including the rangers, seemed very protective of her mother. They’d certainly gone the extra mile by allowing Alex to seclude her mother away from the crowd. They’d spoken to the reporters, who had reluctantly agreed to leave the woman alone. The matter had only been helped by the death of President Harding. The smaller news of her father’s death paled in comparison to the pain of the nation.
Turning to gaze back on the structure she’d called home for four years, Alex sighed. Her life here at El Tovar had been a good one overall. She’d made friends and she’d always felt safe, unlike her life at home.
People were gathering in front of the steps of El Tovar’s main entrance. Alex had learned that Mr. Jastrow and Senator Winthrop were going to announce an end to their festivities and a postponement of their bids for the Democratic nomination for president. She was surprised, but pleasantly so. She reached into the pocket of her skirt and lightly fingered the envelope from Senator Winthrop. Perhaps they weren’t all such bad people. Maybe Valerie was spoiled and self-centered, but she was only portraying what had probably been acceptable behavior for all of her life. Alex felt her heart soften a bit in her thoughts of the entourage. The only exception was Joel Harper. She knew him to be the snake he appeared to be. She could only pray he’d be caught red-handed at his schemes. She knew no one would ever believ
e her if she told them what she knew. After all, she’d tried and the investigator and sheriff had merely laughed her off.
Then there was the issue of her father. She could still hear Joel’s comments on how much she was like him. I am headstrong and determined. Although, she reasoned, those could be good qualities if used properly. Her father’s actions, however, always bordered on cruelty.
Oh, God, I don’t want to be like him. He broke my mother’s heart, and mine as well. When other girls were strolling hand in hand with their fathers, when they played together at picnics or went to the fair—oh, how I envied them! She looked back at the canyon and let the colors blur together, not really seeing anything in particular. I know I have you, Father, but was it wrong to desire an earthly father too?
“Penny for your thoughts.”
She turned and met Luke’s smiling face. Just seeing him here, all dressed up in his finest suit of brown serge, gave her heart a start.
“Why are you dressed to the nines?” she asked, trying to put her introspective thoughts aside.
“I was invited to attend the gathering tonight. I wanted to find you first, however.”
“Why?” “The invitation came from Miss Winthrop.” Alex frowned but said nothing as Luke continued. “She’s been asking me about God, Alex, and I think she’s sincerely seeking.”
Alex put aside her twinges of jealousy and smiled. “I hope she is.”
“Besides that,” Luke continued, “I want to talk to her about Harper. I figure if anyone can help us to figure out his part in your father’s death, it will be Valerie. I also want to watch Harper. I had a long talk with my ranger friends this afternoon. I told them what you’d shared with me and that I thought there was merit in checking it out.”
“And did they listen?” Alex asked hopefully. “To a point. They said they’d keep on the lookout for anything unusual, but that just because Harper spoke in such a manner didn’t mean he meant to act on it. He might have been trying to impress your father.”