YOLO_You Only Live Once

by Sue Seabury

  Hugo listened as they paddled. It seemed like her technique was getting better. Either that or talking helped distract her. “You could offer girlfriend getaways, too. Bill it as an exotic boot camp in a dreamland location, and throw in cooking and language lessons. Yoga on the beach at dawn, surf and paddleboard lessons, hikes through the jungle, all that good stuff. Then top it off with delicious food and dancing and this place’ll be swarming with women.”

  “A steady flow in all seasons would be enough.”

  “Something else you could do is put a picture of yourself and Ramsey on your website.” Her cheeks felt hot, but paddling was hard work. His eyes were on her. She concentrated on the board to stay up and couldn’t look back at him. “So, are we the only guests this week? Queenie and me and those four men?”

  “As a matter of fact, I am expecting another party of four today — women, after my saying they don’t usually come.”

  The waves got a little rougher. Kat felt unsteady and lowered back to her knees.

  Hugo paddled over. “I hope that will be good news to you? Other people to talk to, and not only be confined to one, somewhat unusual, female?”

  “Sure, great. It’s nice of you to think of me.” Her stomach hurt. She’d eaten too much.

  “I fear I must head back,” he said.

  “Fine by me.” Kat was really feeling the burn now.

  On shore, Hugo took charge of her board and paddle and said, “Thank you for coming with me.”

  “Shouldn’t the thanks be the other way around?”

  Hugo shook his head. His curls bobbed adorably. “No. I haven’t been out in . . . a long time. So that was a great pleasure. But also thank you for all the ideas. I realize I have made a mistake in not making more time to get to know my guests. Providing good service is one thing, but by spending more time with them, I can learn so much about what they want out of their vacation. So, yes, my thanks to you.”

  Kat twisted her hair to get it off her neck. She felt warm. She wasn’t sorry to have shared her ideas, but it was silly to think he was interested in her. He only cared about improving his resort.

  “How are your muscles?” he asked.

  Kat palpated her arms gently. “A little sore.”

  “Might need another massage?” His smile broadened.

  He was all about money. Kat looked down. “Maybe. I think I’ll go lie down and see how I feel later.”

  “All right. Drink water. That always helps with recovery. All the things in your mini-fridge are complimentary.”

  “Thanks.”

  “I need to go collect the dishes and head up to the office.”

  “That’s fine. I can find my way on my own.”

  Hugo waved, his face uncertain. Her coolness must have shown, but what did it matter?

  14

  Kat wasn’t so lucky to make it past the dining patio without getting snagged this time. The gang was all there. Queenie apparently didn’t have an off switch, but the Cigarbellies were equally rambunctious, surprising for so early in the morning. Kat soon learned why.

  “We’re going splunking!” Queenie called gaily.

  “Spe-lunking,” Pete corrected. “ From the Latin,spelunca, meaning cave, but originally from the Greek—”

  “Whatevs!” Queenie interrupted. “Kat, do you want your splunker-licious beverage to be a mimosa or a Long Island Iced Tea?”

  “Long Island Iced Tea? For breakfast?” Kat had spoken too soon. Not only did all the men have amber-colored drinks, they were holding cigars. As yet unlit, but a monogrammed silver lighter lay on the counter.

  “What?” Queenie said. “They’re refreshing!”

  “Water for me please, Ramsey.”

  “You got it, Miss Magikat.” He winked.

  Kat pretended not to see it, or Queenie’s jealous glare.

  “How’d you get so wet already?” Queenie said. “Out recreating theFrom Here To Eternity beach love scene?”

  All eyes were now on Kat’s damp, clinging, tissue-thin linen dress.

  “Paddleboarding.”

  “You know how to do that? I’d like to give it a whirl.” Pete said. “Maybe you could show me.”

  Kat shook her head. “It was my first time. Hugo took me.”

  Hugo appeared with the breakfast dishes. He gave a general nod, but his gaze lingered on her the longest.

  “Well. Some of us are getting extraordinary service around here.” Queenie gave Kat the eye.

  Ramsey placed a gigantic coconut decorated with two mini umbrellas and a flower in front of her. “You were sayin’?”

  Queenie seized it and slugged. “Okay, okay, we gettin’ this show on the road or what?”

  “Why are you going so early?” Kat asked.

  “The tides,” Pete answered. “The cave is only accessible at low tide. If we leave now and keep up a good pace—”

  “Less talk, more walk,” Queenie said.

  Kat was on the fence about going anywhere with this crew. “I’d like to change, and I don’t want to hold you up, so. . .” She stopped. Everyone was wearing bathing suits.

  Hugo returned from the kitchen. “You may have to wade. I will go with you to keep an eye on the tide.”

  “Oh.” Spelunking was a new experience, and her suit wasn’t too damp. It seemed a waste of time to dress up for exploring underwater caves. She should go, and it was safer to go with other people. “Alrighty then. Lead the way.”

  Kevin and Liam positioned themselves on either side of Hugo like bodyguards, and started a conversation about holding a poker tournament at the resort. Even from behind it was clear Hugo wasn’t interested, but his tone stayed polite. Kat felt too intimidated to join in a discussion she knew nothing about.

  Queenie latched on to Stan and they too discussed poker. That left Kat with Pete at the rear of the pack.

  “Ever explore caves before?” His eyebrows waggled like pale gray caterpillars.

  “No,” she said, looking out at the horizon. “All new to me.”

  “Allow me to be your guide.”

  They were back at the cliff edge. “Oh, it’s near the shell beach? I wonder why Hugo didn’t tell me.”

  Queenie turned, nose wriggling. “Gave you a personal tour, huh?” She took a noisy swig from her coconut. It sounded almost empty already.

  “No,” Kat said. “Just, I was looking for a quiet place, and he recommended it. He didn’t . . . he didn’t stay.” She looked at Hugo’s back but he didn’t turn. He must not have heard his name. Or he was intentionally ignoring her. She cleared her throat. “What time did you say the tide was, Pete?”

  “Yep, best keep moving.”

  Queenie took one final loud slurp and tossed her coconut into the bushes. “Love recyclable packaging.”

  Pete walked beside Kat as much as the path allowed, his jealousy of Hugo coming through loud and clear. She could have corrected his wrong idea, but she didn’t want to encourage him. Might as well get some use out of Hugo.

  She expected the cave to be a long hike from the shell beach, but it wasn’t. She would have asked Hugo why he hadn’t mentioned it but he was still being held captive by Liam and Kevin. They had moved on to other casino games they thought The Retreat should offer. Hugo had that professional-neutral face on.

  “How romantic!” Queenie yelled. Her nail file voice echoed off the walls.

  “Romantic” wasn’t quite the word that came to mind with this crew. But it was intriguing, with lots of nooks and crannies, and the glowing green water made interesting shapes on the walls.

  Kat’s eyes drifted to Hugo. He raised his chin in invitation. She’d make something up, ask him to explain how caves were formed, anything, to get him a break from those two blowhards.

  She had just taken one step toward him when Pete intercepted her. “Spot the fried egg!” His bruised ego had recovered at exactly the wrong moment. He beamed the flashlight on his phone.

  “Hugo, I have an idea.” Stan waved his cigar and walked over
to him. “You say you don’t want a tournament, but what about something small and intimate where you know all the players?”

  Queenie scuttled after him like a giant crab.

  Hugo was now almost hidden by other bodies. Kat swallowed the sigh and looked where Pete’s light pointed. It really did look like an egg. “Neat.”

  “That happens when drops of water containing calcite drip slowly over many years, forming stalactites and stalagmites,” Pete said. “Now, do you know how to tell the difference between the two?”

  Kat pretended to think. “One’s on the ceiling and one’s on the floor?”

  “Bingo. Stalactites holdtightto the ceiling and stalagmitesmight reach the top. Get it?”

  A great way to remember, if you’re ten. Still, the way she was forgetting things lately, she shouldn’t turn her nose up at any memory device. She offered Pete a smile. “Got it.”

  Her gaze strayed to Hugo again. Kevin and Liam had moved to the mouth of the cave but Stan and Queenie were still bending Hugo’s ear. Kat didn’t want to interrupt Queenie. Stan might not pick up on her ruse, but Queenie would.

  “Hey, did you hear the joke about the egg?” Kat said to Pete.

  “Tell me.”

  “Never mind. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”

  Pete’s laugh reverberated around the cave, then he looked at Kat expectantly. “Go ahead, hit me with it.”

  “That was the joke. Egg, cracked.” She shrugged.

  Pete laughed loud and hard, but it sounded a little forced. “Love it, Cathy. Cracked, egg.” He wiped his eyes. “Hey, got a knock-knock joke for ya.”

  “Shoot.”

  “Knock-knock.”

  “Who’s there?”

  “Omelette.”

  “Omelette who?”

  “Omelette smarter than I look!”

  It was impossible for Kat not to humor Pete’s nervous smile. “Funny.”

  “Anyone got a light?” Kevin called.

  Ever-helpful Pete scurried over. Kat shook her head, then stopped. If a friend had asked her a favor, she would have done it. His joke was funny. And he knew a lot. Pete wasn’t so bad.

  Still holding forth on poker, Stan guided Hugo to the cave entrance. Queenie stayed behind and signaled to Kat, judging each man’s behind with exaggerated hand motions. Kat’s eyes rested on Hugo’s rear. It wasn’t fair to compare the older men’s to his. His was a platinum star-type backside.

  She waved Queenie over.

  “So, tell me,” Kat said, “Did you plan to come to this resort alone? Or did something happen to your best friend too?” She wasn’t doing market research for Hugo, she was just interested.

  “Hm? Oh, no. She doesn’t go anywhere these days except work. She’s busy being Miss BigWig running her new show. It’s calledEvery Witch Way. Ever hear of it?”

  “Oh, I have. It’s really cute.”

  Pete elbowed Stan and Hugo. Kat couldn’t quite hear, but it was clear he was working hard to get everyone to lighten up. Another commonality between herself and Pete: they played peacemaker.

  “A lot of my friends’ kids are addicted to it,” Kat said to Queenie. “So your friend is the director? Wow, how interesting.”

  “Pshaw. What’s so great about slaving away behind the scenes?” Queenie harumphed, then proceeded to talk about her acting jobs. Kat only listened with half an ear.

  “Commercials pay pretty well, but rich men are easier to score.” Queenie pulled her head toward the cave entrance.

  “So, how did you find this place? The resort, I mean.”

  “Came down last winter on a factory tour. That same friend and I were going to start this business venture — penis cozies, absolutely fabulous idea. Any-hoo, I was scouting out places to manufacture them, and found out about this place at an all-night poker tournament.”

  While Queenie rambled on about some sort of handmade men’s underwear in the shape of elephant trunks and power tools, Kat thought about the Help for the Homeless project she did a few years before. She’d been more than willing to organize, but somehow found herself in charge of knitting washcloths and scarves for the “bags of hope.” Some of Kat’s washcloths could have probably passed for oddball underwear. She was always getting roped into stuff. She needed to be more proactive, take charge and not just follow. She huffed.

  Queenie paused.

  “Oh, so just pure luck,” Kat said, hoping the remark was vaguely related to the conversation. Josie had only found this place after lots of digging. Their website needed better keywords to improve its search engine ranking. Maybe she’d mention it to Hugo.

  She was about to suggest they join the men when Queenie revved up again. “Any-hoo, the Cozy thing didn’t pan out. Got a lot of hits, but when they weren’t ready in time for Christmas, people got a teensy bit miffed, then I guess we maxed out the market in a couple of months. Who’da thunk it?”

  “Who indeed?”

  “But it wasn’t a total loss. It was a decent win, for poker. These guys think women don’t know how to play.” Queenie chuckled. “Fleeced ‘em good. Had to follow one guy back here since he hadn’t brought enough cash with him.”

  She looked like the cat who swallowed the canary. “He paid up quick enough when I threatened to tell his wife where he’d been. And how much he’d lost.” She gazed complacently at the cave entrance. “The Retreat is millionaire central.”

  Kat studied the round forms outlined in sunlight. “Really?”

  “Totally. It’s like a secret club.”

  Maybe Hugo was intentionally hiding on the internet.

  Queenie shrugged. “I know they don’t look like much, but think of them as big game.”

  Kat scrunched her nose. Pete excepted, the Bellies could be hippos. Still, Hugo could take them all down.

  “I love games,” Queenie said. “Especially the kind where you stick your claws in and dollar bills come flying out.” She cackled, then leaned in. “Hugo’s not interested in gaming though. Can’t say I blame him. Draws sketchy types.” She fluffed her hair in a way that indicated she and sketchy had never crossed paths.

  “Tide’s coming up,” Hugo called from the entrance. “We’d better go.”

  Kat tried to catch his eye in the hope he might wait and walk with her.

  Pete marched up instead. “Did you know there are over two hundred species of birds on the island?”

  The same groups reformed: Hugo up front with self-appointed bodyguards Kevin and Liam, and Queenie latched on to Stan. If Hugo had wanted to talk to her, he could have found a way. She said to Pete, “I did not.”

  Pete was a walking encyclopedia of local flora and fauna. He knew the answers to most of Kat’s questions, and when he didn’t, he obligingly pulled out his phone and looked them up.

  “What an informative mini-tour. Thank you, Pete.”

  His sunburnt chest puffed. “My pleasure, Cathy.”

  She didn’t correct him.

  When they got back to the cliff, the group stopped to take in the view of rugged cliffs plunging dramatically into blue water.

  “I must go back, but please, take your time.” Hugo nodded generally and caught Kat’s eye, then headed up the path.

  “Lovely, but I’ve seen it.” She started to follow him. None of the others moved. Hugo had almost disappeared around a bend. He was obviously busy. Or had decided he’d gleaned all the info he wanted from her.

  She turned back. “But it’s not something I could ever get tired of.” She exclaimed about the dramatic vista with the others. Apparently even bored millionaires still had some wonderment in them.

  “Hope they set up the bar here tonight,” Stan said. “The sunset, the view, large amounts of alcohol, you’ll love it Queen-Doll.”

  Queenie simpered while Kat thought,Doll? The only doll she could picture gargantuan Queenie as would be one of those blow-up sex toys.

  “Hugo said the forecast wasn’t great,” Kat said. “They’re watching a hurricane.”

&n
bsp; “Hurricane?” Pete said. “I didn’t see anything about a hurricane.”

  “It’s far away. Just, he’s keeping an eye.”

  “I’m heading back.” Pete pulled the phone from its belt holster and started fiddling with it. “Everyone ready?”

  “I’m with ya. I need to take a piss,” was Liam’s slurred contribution.

  “You wanna go stock up for a Big One, Queen-Doll?” Stan said, waggling his cigar.

  “As long as it involves a case of champagne and other necessities, sure.” Queenie giggled. Kat had been wrong about Queenie’s talent; she was a good actress after all.

  “I don’t think you need to worry,” Kat said. “Hugo said it was way far out. Probably won’t get anywhere near here.”

  But the others were already striding, stumbling, or tottering away.

  Kat started to follow, then thought,Why? Pete was okay, but the rest of them weren’t her speed, and Hugo had barely acknowledged her since they returned from paddleboarding. Here was an opportunity to forge her own path. A minor one, but still. She headed back down to the rocks to the blowhole and picked a spot where she could watch it.

  The wild spray reminded her of Hugo’s hair.

  So, time to stop pretending she wasn’t attracted to him. But so what? She was only here for one short week. He was young, potentiallymuch younger than she. And, biggest problem, they lived a thousand miles apart. There was no future in such a relationship, if he was even interested. She should focus more on Pete. He was the right age, and as for logistics, Philadelphia was much more doable than Puerto Rico.

  She strolled along the rock jetty and tried to use the natural beauty to concentrate on big-picture stuff. She liked Hugo’s idea of an authentic life experience. The perfect place to try it out was right now. Queenie knew how to do it. So did the Cigarbellies. Kat had to learn to be more assertive about what she wanted.

  Her skin was starting to show signs of burn. She headed back up the rocks.

  * * * *

  “And what can I do for you today?” Hugo straightened his sarong as if Mr. Alvarez could see him, which, if he had installed cameras in the office, he could.

  “Thought of any ways to improve your numbers yet?”

  “Yes. In fact, I have a new group of four coming in today. They’re new, but I’m sure they’ll be interested in many excursions.” Hugo’s jaw grew tight as he virtually promised to upsell unknown clients.