Barbarian of Elysia

by Tom Gallier

  He held her tightly, looking deep into her lovely brown eyes. Alex stroked her long, silky hair and grinned.

  “We'll both have to stay in here for a while. At least until it calms down outside,” he said. “What will we do?”

  She wagged her brows, reached back, and pulled the bow knot holding her top upon her body. The skimpy top went flying across the room, and Alex buried his face in her cleavage. Her breasts were small, but youthfully firm and perky, and her fragrant skin was satiny smooth. He found a knot on her right hip, tugged it loose, and her skirt fell to the floor. She wasn’t wearing anything underneath it. Her wicked little smile widened.

  “I’m sure we can find something to occupy ourselves,” she purred.

  Up close, he noticed she had far more tattoos than he first thought. Her left arm was a full sleeve of dragons intertwined with roses. Across her chest, above her breasts, stretched out a line of words. He couldn't read it, but it looked like Greek script. A red and green tattoo of a serpent wrapped around her left leg, ending at her sex. Symbolic?

  And then she grabbed him through his pants, and not particularly gently, either. Yeah, he rose to the occasion as expected.

  This dream is about to end as a wet dream, Alex thought as he sucked on a firm, erect nipple. That should really piss off my new staff.

  He didn't want to cream his shorts, and the bed sheets, but there was no way he wasn't going to nail his dream damsel. What's the use of being a big barbarian warrior in your dream, except to save a damsel and get laid by her afterwards?

  Helene leaned back, pulling him towards the bed. There was nothing he wanted more than to be in bed with her, so he decided to take his time and enjoy her to the max. Alex smothered her boobs with kisses, and then started kissing his way down her body. Helene gasped, stiffened, and then sighed contentedly.

  “Barbarians are the best lovers,” she whispered. “Ravage me, my beautiful barbarian.”

  Alex rose to his full height, yanked her head back by her silky brown hair, and held her gaze. Helene gasped and trembled. For a second, he thought she might actually climax. Yeah, she looked that aroused.

  “You may regret that request before I'm through,” he growled.

  Her eyes closed, body shaking like a leaf, and sighed gustily. “Oh please.”

  Best dream ever!

  Alex claimed her lips in a long, deep kiss. He felt passion erupt, within her and himself. Their hands roamed as they moaned and groaned. She unbuckled his belt, sending his sword crashing to the floor. Then she untied his linen pants, before her hand slipped in and stroked his erection. Soon, he began kissing his way down again, so she had to release him. He once again indulged himself in her beautiful breasts a long moment, before working his way down, down, down.

  Alex dropped to his knees. Helene wiggled and giggled, grinding herself into him while he held onto her wonderfully rounded hips. He nuzzled her little pubic patch, before giving her sex a little kiss. The big blond warrior was so happy to find her ready. She was just as excited as him.

  Pressing his mouth to her sex, he kissed, licked, and sucked. Helene gasped, stiffened, and then bowed her back. Her long, delicate fingers combed through his hair, before grabbing hold. She ground herself into his mouth, as he ate her out. Soon, they were both moaning and groaning.

  “Please don't stop,” she begged in a hoarse whisper. “Please. Just. Like. . .”

  Helene's breath caught and she trembled violently. Her hands tightened in his hair, holding her sex to his hungry mouth.

  Even before her orgasm subsided, Alex pushed her back onto the bed. She giggled, spreading her legs wide. He crawled over her, kissing his way back up her body. Helene wrapped a hand around his cock and started stroking when he reached her lips.

  Moving up, he released her lips and let her guide him in. He'd never seen a woman so aroused, so eager.

  Only in a dream.

  Alex thrust in hard. He felt resistance, and then she opened up. His cock slid into her hot, tight sex. He gasped, a thrill rippling through him.

  “Uggh!” Helene grunted. “Oooh, so wonderful.”

  He thrust and thrust into her, watching her face. Pure bliss spread across her features. Helene's eyes fluttered closed, as her head rolled back and rocked from side to side. Soon, she started gasping and crying out with every thrust. Alex felt like a god. A love god. He'd never pleased a woman like that before.

  “Yes! Yes!” she cried. Helene's back bowed, she stiffened, and her eyes were incredulous. He felt her belly quivering like crazy. “Oooooooh.”

  Her vagina clamped down on him. It quivered around him. His breath caught as hot tingles flowed into his thighs. Alex became frantic. Almost there. Almost. There. And then Helene wrapped her legs tightly around him, forcing him in all of the way.

  “Yes,” Alex cried, back bowing as she dragged her nails across his back and his body erupted with insane pleasure, once, twice, three times. Helene sighed contentedly, and he collapsed atop her. “Holy crap. That was amazing.”

  Alex wasn't sure how long they lay like that. He remained inside her, though limp, until she cleared her throat. That squirted him right out.

  “Oops,” she whispered, and giggled. “Sorry. Put it back.”

  “I wish,” he said, still panting. Still hot and sweaty. And realization hit. “I didn't wake up.”

  Alex rolled to the side and sat up. He'd never slept through a wet dream. Was that even possible? Nobody could stay asleep when they climax. It was too intense. Hell, he’d just had the most intense sex of his life.

  “I'm still here,” he said, looking around as he panted.

  “Of course you are, my barbarian lover,” Helene purred, digging long nails into his back. “I'm not that kind of witch.”

  What the hell does that mean? Alex wondered. She's a witch? There are different kinds of witches?

  Alex looked around. He felt the daytime heat and the sweat on his skin. The hot sweaty slickness between him and Helene had been especially nice, as was the tingling still in his loins. Her sweet scent filled his nostrils, and fired his libido.

  Everything was exquisitely real. Way too real to be a dream. Did he dream in color? Everything around him was in vivid color, and the smells… Okay, the stench of co-mingled cooking meat, bread, and human waste all but assaulted him.

  If it was a dream, then it was the most epic ever. And then a man appeared outside the window, grinning in at them. As he slowly moved to the left, his “vehicle” rolled by. It looked like one of those brightly decorated tuk-tuks found in India and Asia. Only it was flying.

  “What the hell?”

  Chapter 5

  “Ignore him. Flup-flup witches are all petty pervs,” Helene said. She crawled up to straddle him, and then she kissed him. Helene stroked his cheek with a little frown. “Your shave spell is expired. I can take care of it.”

  Shave spell? What the hell was that? But then she stood up, towering over him. Alex looked up, and forgot everything else as he stared up at her from that angle. Helene winked with a knowing smile, before walking over to a shelf. She picked up a ceramic bowl and jug, and then picked up a sheathed curved knife.

  “Just lay back and relax,” Helene said, and straddled his waist again.

  Yeah, a naked chick straddling him wasn’t distracting. Really, he wanted to go look out the window and check on that flup-flup witch and his flying car. But no man could deny a hot chick like Helene anything, and if she wanted to give him a shave…

  “Do you have a razor?” he asked. “I don’t think a knife will do the job.”

  She looked at him like he was crazy. “I told you that I’m a witch. In fact, I’m a heavy-lift witch, so a simple shave spell is nothing.”

  She turned to fill the bowl with water from the jug. Alex noted the jug and bowl were decorated in a design he considered ancient Greek. The two ceramic pieces were a dark orange, with black figures of wrestling men. Naked wrestling men. Yeah, the people in his dream weren’t big
on wearing clothes.

  Helene thrust two fingers into the water while chanting. Her fingers started to glow red, and steam began rising up from a few seconds later. Alex reached over to touch piping hot water. His jaw dropped.

  “How did you…”

  “Witch. Are you listening to anything I say?”

  Helene dipped a small brush into the water, before swirling it around inside a smaller, deeper bowl. That caused white lather to rise up within, which she quickly slathered over Alex’s whiskers. And then she unsheathed the black-handled knife.

  “Is that knife sharp enough?”

  He envisioned being left a bloody mess. She gave him a foul look.

  “It is my athame,” she said, as if that answered everything. When he gave her a questioning look, “Magic blade. One of the Four Elemental Tools of Witchcraft. It’s pure silver, enchanted, and sharper than sin.”

  Helene didn’t give him time to reply. She pricked her left middle finger with the tip of the athame, drawing forth a bead of blood, and then began chanting. The blood evaporated in a puff of black smoke and the black-handled blade started to glow with inner fire. She pinched his nose closed, jerked his face aside, and slowly dragged the edge across his cheek. Her chanting continued while she slowly, carefully shaved that side of his face.

  Alex’s eyes locked on a tattoo of a curved blade on her right wrist, which began to writhe. He wasn’t sure, but her dragon tattoos might’ve moved a little as well. Or was that just the play of her muscles under the skin?

  To distract himself, and not freak out, Alex reached up to fondle her dangling boobs. A tiny smile spread across her face. She gasped and pulled the athame away when he mischievously pinched a nipple.

  “Don’t blame me if you get nicked,” she said. “But I do rather like it rough.”

  Alex became rock hard instantly. “Can you shave me while we…”

  “No.” She tapped a finger between his eyes. “Behave. I’ll let you do anything you want after I’m finished.”

  The way she said “anything” melted his brain. Such a wicked looked filled her eyes, too. But Helene quickly finished shaving the left side of his face.

  “This will be good for three to six months,” she said as she wiped the athame clean.

  She pressed her finger to his nose, forcing him to turn the other side of his face up. Resuming her soft chant, Helene gave him a sultry little smile and started all over again on the right side. In no time, Helene shaved him clean, save for his mustache and goatee. That, she trimmed with ordinary scissors.

  “There. You look beautiful.”

  “So this world’s barbers are all witches?”

  She looked confused. “This world? You say the oddest things, barbarian. Most Sybari people prefer the services of witch-barbers, since the shave lasts for months.”

  “Sybari? Is this the city of Sybari?”

  It was Helene’s jaw’s turn to drop. “How can you not know what land and city you are in?”

  “Um,” he said, squirming under her hot scrutiny. “Barbarian?”

  Helene rolled her eyes. “This is the city-state of Kandos, in the Sybaro Lands. I’m from a village north of the city, so I’m a Sybarite and Kandosian citizen.”

  She explained that the city of Kandos ruled over the lands immediately surrounding it. Basically, every village that provided food to Kandos was part of their city-state kingdom. As a village-born citizen Helene had certain rights, but a city-citizen had even more rights. Being a witch didn’t afford her any special rights or status in society. Apparently, there were a lot of witches.

  Alex’s stomach chose that moment to grumble and growl.

  “Shall we go get something to eat?” Helene asked, getting a sultry look. “Before you pay me for that wonderful shave?”

  The look she cast down upon him left Alex with no doubt how she desired to be rewarded for her efforts. He wanted to explore what she considered rough sex, but his empty belly was distracting.

  “Only if you promise to show me around a little, and explain to a simple barbarian how this wonderful world of civilization works.”

  They quickly dressed. Alex only had his now filthy, but dry linen pants. Helene dressed more casually than before: White halter top, tight black and white vertically stripped pants, and knee boots. And just like the princess earlier, she wore heels. Helene accessorized with lots of bangles, necklaces, big hoop earrings, and rings on every finger. Oh, and a wide belt with her athame and multiple, bulging leather pouches.

  “Wow, that’s a… Look,” he said.

  “You don’t like my clothes?”

  “Actually, I kind of like how you look dressed like that a little too much,” he said. “If you know what I mean.”

  She just laughed and led the way out onto the crowded streets of the Witches Quarter. Alex finally realized it was late afternoon. As they moved through the streets, jostled by the crowd, he looked all around in wide-eyed wonder. It proved a much more interesting place than he realized earlier.

  “What are those called again?”

  Helene glanced up at the red, green, and blue painted flying craft. It looked like a tuk-tuk without wheels, and a large fan in back to propel it through the air. A man sat in front on what looked like an elongated bicycle seat. There was a small covered compartment where up to two people could sit behind him, with the large fan behind the cabin.

  It looked gaudy and fun.

  “That’s what we call a flup-flup,” she said. “A taxi. The pilot will fly you anywhere within the city for a small fee.”

  The reason behind the name was obvious. That was the sound it made flying: flup-flup-flup-flup.

  “How much does a flup-flup cost?”

  “You can’t fly it,” she said. She tapped a tattoo of a small stylized bird on her right forearm. “It takes a lift-witch to fly. I’ve worked at a taxi flyer, and…” She tapped the knife tattoo on her wrist. “As a barber. I’m a heavy-lift witch now.”

  Helene indicated a tattoo of a brown raptor on her right forearm. If those tattoos indicated what magic powers she had, then Alex wondered what power the snake wrapped around her left leg indicated. Considering the snake’s forked tongue came to the edge of her sex…

  “Heavy-lift witch?” he asked. “Does that mean you lift up giant stone blocks to build city walls or something?”

  “I can,” she said. “But I don’t. I lift ships.” She pointed off in the distance. Two ships with billowing sails were approaching the city. “The wind might drive them forward, but it takes a witch onboard to lift them up into the sky.”

  Alex stared up at the flying ships, and then looked at her. “That is the most awesome thing I’ve ever heard.”

  She looked so pleased. “Only a barbarian could be impressed by that.”

  He pulled her in tight and kissed her cheek. “I’m even more impressed by you, my sexy little witch.”

  And then he started kissing her neck.

  She squealed with delight and wiggled free. Helene grabbed his hand and led him to a nearby street vendor.

  “Buy me sausage, and I’ll pay for your first ever flup-flup ride.”

  “Deal,” Alex said. His shiny new barbarian persona came with a leather purse with a few bronze coins. He was careful to keep the silver and gold bangle inside out of site while fishing out a few coins. Helene gave his purse a mercenary look. Yeah, the outline of the bangle was pretty obvious. “Is this enough?”

  It took three of the five coins he held up. Helene plucked them from his hand, and handed them to the street vendor. The tall, skinny vendor gave Alex’s remaining two coins a covetous look, but quickly turned to wrap two sausages in a thick tortilla like bread.

  “Is this a gyro?”

  “No. That’s different,” she said. “Do you want a gyro instead?”

  “What? And miss watching you eat that sausage?”

  The vendor did a double-take, and her jaw dropped. He saw a bit of pink spread across her face as she rolled her eye
s. But then, she took her sausage out of the bread wrap, and slowly sucked it all the way down and swallowed it whole. Then she winked at him.

  “You’re going to have a very long, enjoyable night, Alex.”

  She laughed at his shocked expression. Taking him by the hand, the witch led Alex through the streets to a large marble public building. Three flup-flups rested on the cobbled plaza before that structure. Helene gave one of them a bronze coin, and they climbed into the small, snug cabin behind the pilot.

  The flup-flup was bright red, with lots of yellow, green, and blue decorations and what Alex called “dingle-balls” handing around the cabin. The pilot didn’t look more than sixteen years old, with a friendly face. He wore the same dirty white pants as most of the male population, but with a black-handled knife sheathed at his waist.

  “That’s his athame,” Helene whispered when their pilot drew his silver blade. Unlike Helene’s athame, he had a straight blade. The pilot pricked his finger, letting the blood drip upon a small pentacle painted on the wooden keel beam everything rested upon. He chanted, and a second later the flup-flup began to rise. They lurched forward when he started pedaling, spinning the fan behind them. “And here we go. I hope you don’t get air sick.”

  Helene called commands to him from the open cabin, directing the pilot to take them a circuitous route around the city. Alex marveled at all the wonders below. From the street, he’d seen a few grand structures, but mostly filthy and harried humanity. From above, the city looked incredible. He spotted mansions and palaces with walled gardens, and even more spectacular public buildings and temples of bright white marble. Countless flup-flups flew lower over the city, many down in the street canyons just above the crowd’s heads.

  They flew the length of the city’s harbor. There had to be over a hundred ships moored there. He even found some above-water docks, where the ships rested in cradles of stone and wood. Most of the ships were fat-bellied merchantmen, but a few were long, sleek warships. Helene named them, ticking off nationalities he’d never heard of, and many different types of ships. Most were either galleys or galleons. Alex wasn’t certain what differentiated them. They all looked like old tall ships or Viking long ships to him, but they could fly.