“Just a kiss.” He shrugged and seemingly shook off his dour mood. With a smile, he touched Emily’s cheek. “If this lasts, it may save the corn.”
“I hope so.” Her smile matched his. Relief that he wasn’t going to make an issue of the kiss flowed through her. “Please come in. You need to dry off.”
“There’s no point. I’ll just get wet again going home.”
“Why don’t you stay for supper? Aunt Fay is in town at my folks’ house, so it’s just Emily and me. Surely this rain deserves a little celebration.”
He looked out at the pouring rain. “I don’t have anything dry to wear.”
“I still have some of Rory’s old clothes upstairs. I’ll go get them.” She shoved Emily into his arms and dashed off before he could find another excuse.
When she returned, she carried an old pair of dungarees and a flannel shirt. “I didn’t give you these with the rest of Rory’s things because they’re about ready for the rag bag.” She handed them to him.
He shrugged. “At least they’re dry. Why don’t I go feed your chickens before I change? It’s late, and there’s no point in you getting any wetter.” He set the clothes on the table and Emily on the floor.
“I’m as wet as you are,” she said.
His gaze lowered. “I noticed. You can do something about it while I’m gone.”
She smiled as he slammed the screen door shut behind him. Apparently he wasn’t as immune to her as he would like her to believe. Not that it mattered. She eyed the ring on the windowsill, and guilt niggled at her conscience. When she went upstairs to put on dry clothes, she left the ring where it was. Tonight she didn’t want to think about Nathan’s proposal.
She changed into the new blouse her mother had given her for her birthday and a dark green skirt. After toweling her hair dry, she braided it and tied a green ribbon around the end. Emily pointed at the ribbon, and she tied a matching one around the baby’s head.
“Very pretty,” she said, holding her up to the mirror. “Don’t we look nice?”
Emily giggled. Tess smiled and left the room with her daughter riding on her hip. Daniel hadn’t come in yet. She checked the tomatoes and pushed the cooker to the back of the stove. Then she stared at the well-stocked pantry shelves, trying to think of something festive to make for supper. The kitchen door opened.
“Tess,” Daniel called out.
“I’m in here.” She poked her head out of the pantry. “Oh, you brought me a chicken.”
He set the bird on the table. “Freshly plucked and cleaned. Can we have it for supper?”
“Of course. I was trying to decide what to make.”
“I know you hate killing them, so I did it for you.”
“I appreciate it. Rory called me a town girl whenever I cringed over killing a chicken.”
“I remember. I’ll go change.” He picked up the clothes lying on the table and left the room.
While she cooked supper, Daniel entertained Emily. The house was cozy with the sound of rain drumming on the roof and her daughter’s happy laughter. Tess never wanted it to end. The rain was letting up when she brought the food to the table.
“That smells delicious.”
“Thank you. The rain is stopping.”
He carried Emily to the kitchen door, opened it, and stared up at the sky. “Do you mind if I leave the door open?”
“Please do. I love the smell of damp earth.” She set the platter of fried chicken on the table. “Everything is ready.”
He placed Emily in her highchair, and Tess tied a bib around her neck. When they were both seated, she reached for his hand. “We should say grace.”
“It seems fitting. May I?”
She nodded and squeezed his hand.
He cleared his throat. “Thank you, God, for this food we are about to receive. Thank you for the much needed rain. We are truly grateful. Bless Tess and Emily and keep them safe from harm. Amen.”
She opened her eyes and smiled, her heart full of love and longing. “Thank you, Daniel.”
While they ate, he talked about the corn. “This rain should save most of what’s still alive. We may be able to start harvesting the end of next week.”
She looked up from her plate. “So soon?”
“Even with the rain, it isn’t going to be our best crop. Time won’t improve its condition at this point.”
“Will we make enough money to live all winter?”
“I hope so, but we won’t have anything extra.”
“Emily and I don’t need much. The only thing I have to buy for her before winter is shoes.”
He reached over and tweaked her toe. “Now why would you need shoes? You like your feet bare.”
“Soon it’ll be too cold for that.”
“I think we can afford a pair of shoes. In fact, I know we can. I almost forgot my big news. In the excitement over the rain, it slipped my mind.”
His face lit up and she wondered at the cause. “What news?”
“There was a letter from the lawyer in Denver. He may have a buyer for Uncle John’s house.”
“Oh, Daniel, that’s wonderful!”
Laugh lines crinkled at the corners of his eyes. “I was pleased about it.”
“First the rain, and now this.”
He set down his piece of chicken and looked across the table at her. “The lawyer wrote that if the sale goes through, we’ll both need to go to Denver to sign the papers since you own Rory’s share of the house.”
“A trip to Denver.” She smiled, thrilled at the prospect. “I can’t remember the last time I went anywhere.”
“We would have to stay overnight. He’ll write again to tell us when to come.”
“Is he certain the sale will happen?”
“I think so.”
She jumped up and ran around the table to hug Daniel. “I’m so excited. What are we going to do with the money?”
“I haven’t thought about it. You’re awfully happy for a lady who said you didn’t need anything.”
“That was when we didn’t have any money to spend.”
He laughed. “We’re hardly rich, Tess. Don’t get your heart set on a bunch of big, shiny diamonds.”
Diamonds reminded her of the little ones surrounding the pearl in her ring. Her happiness dimmed. She had to tell him she’d about made up her mind to marry Nathan.
“What did I say?” he asked.
She forced a smile. “Nothing. I remembered something I need to do.”
“I hope it doesn’t involve me and that bushel basket full of beans on the back porch.”
She wouldn’t ruin the moment discussing her relationship with Nathan. It could wait. “Now that you mention it, I could use some help snapping them. You didn’t have anything planned for the rest of the evening, did you?”
He groaned. “I suppose not.”
He played with Emily while Tess washed the dishes. Afterward she took her daughter upstairs, changed her diaper, and dressed her in her nightgown. Then she sat down in Daniel’s rocking chair to nurse her. While Emily nursed, Tess thought about the man waiting for her downstairs. She wondered if he would be upset if she married Nathan. Why should I care?
She closed her eyes and willed the thought to the back of her mind. Daniel had made it clear there could never be anything more than friendship between them. He wouldn’t begrudge her what happiness she could find with Nathan. And if he was upset, Lottie would be there to ease his pain. With a sigh, she laid Emily in the crib and shut the door.
Daniel looked up when she entered the kitchen. He snapped the ends off the beans and tossed them in a bucket. “What are you going to do with all these beans?”
“Can them. I finished the tomatoes. Knowing how you feel about tomato preserves, I might be persuaded to give you a few jars.”
“I guess that would be fair compensation for snapping a million beans.”
She sat down at the table. She should tell him now about Nathan’s proposal. Waiting wouldn’t make it any less p
ainful. It wouldn’t change anything.
“Rory would have been thirty tomorrow.”
Her fingers clenched around the bean in her hand. “I hadn’t forgotten.”
“Do you mind if we talk about him? He’s been on my mind lately.”
“No, of course not.”
“We’re both getting accustomed to his absence. It hurts, but it’s a familiar ache.”
“I know exactly what you mean. Has it changed the way you feel about things?” she asked, hope rising.
“I don’t feel any less guilty about his death, but I can live with it. I have to.”
She cared more about his feelings for her. “I wish you wouldn’t do that,” she said, a flash of anger in her voice.
“Do what?”
“Blame yourself. Who do you think you are, Daniel, God all mighty?”
He looked at her, his eyes wide. “Of course not.”
“Well, God is about the only one who could have prevented Jack Craven from shooting Rory.”
“That’s not true. Your precious Nathan could have.”
Tess stared at him. “Do you resent him for that? Are you angry because he’s faster than you with a gun?”
“Hell, Tess, I don’t know.” His voice shook. “Maybe I’m jealous of the attention Nathan is paying you. Maybe I just miss Rory.”
Her anger melted. She touched his hand. “I miss him, too.”
He turned his hand and squeezed her fingers. “I know you do. You’re the only one who understands because your grief is worse than mine.”
“It isn’t worse, Daniel, just different. Your relationship with Rory was special. And being a man, you held your sorrow inside. You didn’t grieve the way I did. I think you’ve had more trouble accepting his death because of it.”
“I can’t accept it because I feel responsible.” He raised his hand when she opened her mouth to protest. “I know you don’t believe it, but I can’t help the way I feel.”
Frustration made her want to lash out. She took a deep breath and used reason instead. “Tell me something. Did Rory blame you?”
“What do you mean?”
“He died in your arms. You were the last person to look into his eyes. Did he blame you?”
“He was dying. His last thoughts were of you.”
“And what were his last words?”
Daniel stared at her, his eyes dark with pain. “He asked me to take care of you.”
“If he blamed you for his death, would he have entrusted my care to you?”
He spoke slowly. “No, I guess he wouldn’t.”
“You think about that, Daniel.”
He pushed away from the table. “Do you mind if I leave these?” He gestured toward the beans.
“Of course not. I didn’t expect you to snap them all.”
“I should go. Thank you for supper, Tess.”
She jumped up and hurried to the door after him. “Are you all right?”
“I’m fine.” He bent to kiss her cheek. “I’ll let you know about Denver.”
She nodded and watched him walk away. After shutting the door she remembered she hadn’t mentioned Nathan’s proposal. She’d put it off because talking about it would make it real.
* * * *
“Why didn’t Daniel come to church today?” Lottie asked as she smoothed out the wrinkles in her mother’s second best tablecloth.
Tess set down the pile of plates and shrugged. “I’m not sure. I haven’t seen him for a few days, not since it rained.”
Wesley scooped up Emily as she tottered toward the door. “I saw him picking up the mail yesterday. He said the rain saved part of your crop.”
She smiled. “It did. We are so very thankful.”
“It sounds like more than rain saved your corn, Tess. You and Daniel deserve most of the credit. He told me how hard you worked in the fields. Why didn’t you say anything last Sunday?”
“There wasn’t much point, and I didn’t mind the work. I’m glad it helped.”
Nathan stepped up behind her and rested his hands on her shoulders. “Once she puts her mind to something, this girl doesn’t give up.”
“No I don’t. You can’t when you live on a farm. This time our perseverance was rewarded.”
Nora entered the room from the kitchen and set a basket of rolls and a bowl of salad on the table. “Well, I wish you would persevere in setting the table. Dinner is almost ready.”
“I think that’s our signal to leave,” Wesley told Nathan. He gave Nora a playful pat on her rear as he passed. She slapped his hand.
“Shoo, both of you. Lottie, don’t just stand there. Go help your aunt in the kitchen.”
Lottie turned from her contemplation of Nathan’s back and followed her mother from the room. She gave her sister a brooding look as she passed. Tess paid little attention. It had been a week since Nathan proposed. She needed to talk to him about her decision.
When dinner was on the table, they filled their plates. Tess cleared her throat. “I have some news.”
Wesley lay down his fork and smiled. “Daniel mentioned the letter from the Denver lawyer. It’s about time that man found a buyer for John’s house.”
Nathan turned to face her. “What house?”
“When Rory and Daniel’s uncle died last fall, they inherited his estate. Uncle John’s lawyer has been trying to sell his house. We just got word he has a buyer. If all goes well, Daniel and I will go to Denver soon to sign the papers.”
“That is good news, Tess,” Nora said. “What are your plans for the money?”
“I imagine we’ll put most of it into the farm.”
“Why didn’t you mention this before?” Nathan asked.
“I didn’t think of it. I’ve had other matters on my mind.”
His gaze met hers, and his eyes widened. “Tess, have you made a decision?”
Fay pushed her spectacles up her nose. “A decision about what?”
Nathan took Tess’s hand in his. She looked into his eyes and saw the hope there, the sparkle of excitement. Now was the time to tell him she would marry him. She opened her mouth and closed it. The words stuck in her throat. Gently she pulled her hand away.
“Nothing, Aunt Fay. Mama, the potatoes are delicious. Did you do something special to them?”
Tess didn’t listen to her response. She felt Nathan’s disappointment and anxiety but couldn’t bring herself to say the words that would make their engagement official. She finished eating her meal in silence, putting off the inevitable.
After dinner, the men went outside. Nora and Fay put away the china in the dining room while Tess and Lottie cleaned the kitchen. Lottie gave the stove a last swipe with the rag and turned to face her sister.
“Is something wrong between you and Nathan?”
She dried the roasting pan before she answered. “Why do you ask?”
“He looked upset, and you were awfully quiet at dinner.”
“Nothing is wrong.”
Lottie rested her hands on her hips. “You’re lying, Tess. Did you two have a fight?”
Her eyes were bright with curiosity and something else Tess couldn’t identify. She forced herself to relax her grip on the dish towel. Irritation loosened her tongue. “Actually, just the opposite. He asked me to marry him.”
The second the words were out, she regretted them. Behind her something shattered. Slowly she turned to face her mother and aunt. A broken glass lay in pieces on the floor.
Nora touched her trembling lips. “You’re getting married? That’s wonderful.”
Tess closed her eyes and let out a long breath. “I didn’t say I was getting married, Mama. I said Nathan proposed.”
“Well, it’s the same thing.” Her eyes sparkled. “Have you set a date? What about a dress? Have you thought about what you’ll wear?”
Tess groaned. “Stop, Mama. I haven’t said I’ll marry him.”
Lottie touched her sleeve. Two bright spots of color rode high in her pale face. “Did you tur
n him down?”
“No, I didn’t turn him down.” She looked away. Carefully she spread the dish towel over the draining rack to dry. “I told him I needed time to think about it.”
“When do you intend to give the man an answer?” Fay asked.
“I’ll tell him soon.”
“You’re going to accept.” Lottie’s voice was flat.
Tess nodded. “He’s a good man.”
“Yes he is.” Nora smiled. “I can’t wait to plan the wedding.”
“Of course I wish you the best,” Fay said, “but are you certain this is what you want?”
Tess squared her shoulders and met her aunt’s gaze. “It’s best for everyone, but I’d rather not discuss it until I speak to Nathan.”
“It doesn’t hurt to plan. I have a new Godey’s Lady’s Book upstairs. We can choose the latest style for your dress.”
Nora hurried off, and Fay smiled. “There’s no holding Nora back when she has the bit between her teeth. I believe I’ll fetch my knitting.”
The door swung shut behind her aunt and Tess turned to Lottie. Her sister stared out the window.
“Are you upset I’m thinking of marrying again?”
Lottie didn’t answer. When she turned, her eyes glittered with tears. “I shouldn’t be surprised, not with a man like Nathan around.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“You always get the best looking man in town, first Rory and now Nathan. You’ll have your second wedding before I have my first.”
“And whose fault is that?” Tess asked. “I can’t be blamed for your choices. Anyway, why are you complaining?” She forced the next words past the lump in her throat. “You’re still seeing Daniel, aren’t you?”
“I’m not getting anywhere with him.” Lottie whirled to face the window again. “He won’t even kiss me. Besides, I would rather—” She stopped abruptly.
“Would rather what?”
“Nothing.”
Tess didn’t pursue the matter. Daniel hadn’t kissed her sister. A weight lifted from her chest.
Lottie turned. “What are you smiling about?”
“Was I smiling?”
She nodded. Her eyes were dry. “Have you told Daniel about Nathan’s proposal?”
Tess lowered her gaze and picked at a spot on her dress. “Not yet.”
Bittersweet Page 19
