Just Breathe (Blue #1)

by Chelle C. Craze

  *****

  Soft strumming of a guitar startles me from a deep sleep. I try to recall the events of last evening, but there isn’t much I remember after getting into the cab. I groggily run my eyes over a pile of moving blankets next to me. Every muscle in my body stiffens when I hear breathing under the covers. I relax when I make out Dar’s familiar small snore. I breathe a sigh of relief. Thank goodness. After sitting up, I slide out of bed slowly, trying not to disturb her.

  This bed is massive, the biggest I’ve ever seen.

  The flooring in the room has an intricate pattern that resembles the number eight embedded into the hardwood. The slats around the windows alternate with colors of ebony and light chestnut. The entire room has a Victorian sense of style. An arched mirror with an intricate swirling design takes up most of the left wall. It stretches from floor to ceiling. I’m beginning to wonder what else Lucas does for money, because I’m pretty sure he can’t afford all of this on a bartender’s salary.

  As the notes coming from the guitar get louder, I stop a moment and let the music wash over me. On a mission, I leave the bedroom and follow the sounds. The farther my footsteps take me, the louder the music gets. Once I find myself standing flush against an exquisite set of double doors, I place my ear on the corner, hoping to amplify the music more. I recognize the song, “Bother” by Stone Sour. However, the voice singing is deeper than what the lead singer, Corey, belts out.

  The music relaxes me. The tension in my shoulders eases away, and I sway my hips slightly along with the tune. The extra movement pushes the doors to open, and I go flying headfirst through them. My hands reach out to grab imaginary objects, and my arms swing through the air. When I land on my hands and knees, I look up. Lucas smiles down at me. The only thing covering his naked body is a guitar.

  “You’re naked!” My voice screeches like a five-year-old girl who just saw a bug, and I close my eyes as tightly as possible. Initially, I’m mortified. However, before I know it, I open one eye and then the other. Excitement quickly takes its place; my tongue slides out and across my bottom lip.

  Lucas lets out a loud husky laugh. “Well, if I’d known you would get on your hands and knees for me, I would’ve started playing hours ago.” He raises an eyebrow. “I’m not naked, see.” He waves his hands in front of him.

  “So help me, Lucas, if this is some kind of ploy to get me to see your business, I’ll never forgive you,” I tease, hoping he isn’t lying.

  Most women would love to do just that, although I’m not ready to see all of him this morning. He moves the guitar from his lap, revealing a pair of khaki cargo shorts perfectly hiding his “business”.

  Lucas bends down and scoops me up with one arm. I squeal as my body lands onto his lap. His chest vibrates; he’s laughing at me.

  He shakes his head and mumbles, “My business?” Then, he throws me onto the center of the bed. As I’m about to protest, all the humor disappears from his face. “What exactly do you remember about last night?” His mouth sets into a thin line. He inches closer to the box spring. “You were really messed up.” Grief floods my body, to the point of making bile rise in my throat. My thoughts travel all over the place. I swore I would never let myself come within reach of that point again. I swallow the sour taste and attempt to recall the events of last night once more.

  Dream-like bits and pieces of images flash through my head. My breath becomes labored. One, two, skip a few, ninety-nine, a hundred. “I remember punching you. Why? What else happened?”

  Lucas chuckles, but his smile doesn’t spread across his face. He sits beside me and thoughtfully takes my hand in his. He lightly grazes his lips against the back of my hand, instantly relieving the anxiety that’s brewing within.

  “Relax. Don’t hold your breath, okay?” He touches my cheek and brings my chin up to meet his gaze. “I don’t need you passing out in my bed and Dartanya finding you. She would kill me. Trust me, she’s already threatened,” he says with a devious smile as he releases my face. “You sort of told me you want to get married and have all my babies, for that matter. You also told me you thought I was hotter than toe socks on a rooster?” He nonchalantly shrugs his shoulders, waiting for my response.

  “I did what? Fuck my life. I...Well, I don’t know what to say. I’m...umm…sorry? I can’t believe I did that.”

  I need to look anywhere other than his eyes. I glance down at the enormous black t-shirt I’m wearing along with a pair of basketball shorts. A whole new wave of panic washes over me. I’m not wearing my dress from last night. My brow beads with droplets. “I have a question.” Nervously, I wipe the sweat from the back of my neck. “How did I get in these clothes?” I raise a hand up and down in front of me.

  Lucas gives me an innocent look. However, his eyes are filled with mischief. “Well, now, that is the question.” He pauses, and a slight growl releases from his chest. Then, he clears his throat. “Okay. Fine...Maybe you didn’t say you wanted to marry me and have my babies, and maybe you were more asleep than drunk. I may have made that up, but I couldn’t make up a statement about a rooster in toe socks, not even if I tried. I think you were dreaming. You fell asleep in the cab, and I carried you to the couch when we walked through the door. You just kept waking up and complaining of smelling like a bar. So...I...” His cheeks flushed, and he looked at the ceiling.

  “You…what?” I cover my face with my hands, hiding my shocked expression. Only a few seconds pass before I cave and remove one hand to study him. He runs his hands through his hair. Then, we both straighten our posture.

  “I changed your clothes for you. I thought you were awake because you kept talking to me.” Lucas pauses, but he keeps his eyes pasted on the ceiling. “Well, since it seems we are playing Twenty Questions, you may as well make yourself comfy.” He clears his throat again. “We’re going to be here for a while. I’ll get us a cup of coffee. I have a couple of questions of my own. Do you take cream or sugar?”

  “No, black,” I say with a soft smile. He gets up, but I stop him with my hand. “Lucas, can you give me your word on one thing?” He nods. “Never lie to me again.” I pinch my lips together and hold my breath, waiting for his answer.

  “I can do that, Cricket, but only if you promise the same.”

  I nod my head agreeing and releasing the air from my lungs.

  “Then, you’ve got a deal. We’ll do it.” He winks at me as he leaves the room.

  I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have issues with a stranger peeling my clothes from my body. I don’t care if I was drunk or half-asleep. The only consolation would be that he’s hot, and he did have good intentions. Anyhow, arguing with him about this wouldn’t change anything. Dar has often told me about the crazy things I do and say while I’m asleep. I sigh and fall backward onto the mattress. At least my panties are cute.

  There is something about Lucas that attracts me to him. I find myself spending too much time thinking of him, and it scares the hell out of me. I try to come up with any excuse making it okay to care for him. I can’t. I shouldn’t like him. Definitely not as much as I do. I only met him two days ago. One thing is certain; this isn’t normal. Maybe I could plead temporary insanity, which would explain everything.

  Lucas returns, carrying two mugs of steaming coffee. He sits on the bed beside me and places his coffee cup onto the nightstand. Shifting, he hands me my cup.

  I close my eyes, inhaling the comforting aroma. “Mmmm, this is delicious. What kind is it?” I ask after taking a sip. The warm liquid soothes my dry throat. “It has to be one of the best I’ve ever tasted.” I take another lingering sip, savoring the flavors. “White chocolate and caramel?”

  “It’s caramel macchiato with my special ingredients. Pretty amazing, don’t you think?” He smiles shyly, reaching for his mug before taking another sip. He runs his fingers along the rim of the mug, and I can’t help feeling jealous of the ceramic beneath his fingertips. “Why did you hit me last night?” He looks down into his cup, like i
t has the answers he’s seeking. “You kept murmuring ‘no’ in your sleep. I wasn’t sure if I should wake you or not. Maybe I should have, but hell, I didn’t know.” He exhales and turns his head toward me, letting his hazel eyes roam my face.

  “Next question, please.” I have no intention of answering that anytime soon, or ever. Lucas continually smirks at me in between sips of his coffee, like he knows some inside joke.

  He moves his back up against the headboard and stretches out his legs along the bed, matching my position. He sits back, chewing his bottom lip and sighing loudly. My breathing catches as I exhale.

  “I’ll accept that answer for now, but I wish you’d eventually tell me. So, for the next question, what exactly do you find sexy about poultry in toe socks? Freud would’ve loved to have you in one of his case studies.” He laughs, instantly causing my skin to turn a brilliant shade of scarlet.

  I giggle nervously. “I don’t find anything ‘sexy about poultry’, as you put it, in socks. It’s something my friends Michael, Lynn, and I used to say when we were younger. Michael and I were maybe, hmm, fifteen, at the time, which would have made Lynn thirteen. Michael and Lynn are brother and sister.” I nod, reassuring myself of the math I did subconsciously inside my mind. “Now, it’s my turn. What question should I ask first?” I tap my nose with my index finger, thinking. “I have it! What the hell do you do for a living? Are you part of the mob, or do you do male escorting?”

  He erupts in a frenzy of laughter. “The mob, a prostitute? No, I’m neither of those things,” he says in between laughs. “Seeing how I told you I wouldn’t lie to you anymore, I’ll tell you. I own The Hot Spot and bartend there for fun. Plus, it’s a way to keep an eye on my employees.” He takes another drink of his coffee, and I do the same as I watch him. “That’s not all. My uncle died of a massive heart attack four years ago, leaving me this house and a sizable amount of money. My turn.”

  I cover my mouth with the mug, stifling a yawn, unsure of what his next question might be.

  “What were you thinking about when I picked you up last night? Before you yelled at me about personal space or something like that.”

  That you smell delectable. Can’t he ask me questions that are easy? Before answering him, I set my mug onto the table and stretch, trying to think of something less embarrassing to tell him. “Umm…well…ugh…” I look down at the blue down-filled comforter and start nervously picking at the edges with my fingers. “I…well...I was thinking that you smelled amazing.” My cheeks fill with blood, and the embarrassment I believe to be worse than when I fell face first into his room.

  Lucas places his coffee mug onto the bedside table, and the bed dips as his weight shifts. He swings his leg over mine, straddling me. My muscles freeze in place, and I remind myself to breathe. He runs his fingertips along the sides of my neck and then rests his hands on each side of my face, pulling it up to meet his gaze. He leaves only a few inches between us. My heart beats loudly, aware of his proximity.

  “Listen, Cassandra. Don’t ever be ashamed to express yourself, especially not with me. You could never make me mad. Now, it’s your turn.” His breath is warm against my skin, which makes my heart pound even harder against my chest.

  I wait for Lucas to move, but he doesn’t. His eyes stay on me. He slowly removes each finger, leaving only one against my flesh. He then traces down my jawline and across my chin. My skin immediately feels his absence and longs for his return. Involuntarily, my mouth opens, and I close my eyes, enjoying his touch. A raspy moan rumbles from deep inside his chest and then his finger is gone, replaced by his lips crashing onto mine.

  His kiss is hard, full of desire, and hot enough to make me forget my own name. In this moment, any insecurities I have about him leave my mind. I can’t think straight. My heart feels as if it is going to burst out of my chest. I have kissed people before, but it was never like this. It feels like the stars have aligned, the world has stopped turning, and we have found a place of solitude, just for us. Lucas deepens the kiss by tasting my mouth with his tongue, causing me to open wider, allowing him to savor every second of this kiss. An unintentional low moan escapes my mouth, and he smiles against my skin. I run my fingers through his hair and tug it a little too hard in the heat of the moment. It’s just the right length to grab and pull. Lucas runs his fingertips slowly up my thigh, leaving behind a trail of goose bumps in their place. I feel a throbbing sensation start to grow between my legs and am glad I’m not a man. He would know how much I want him right now, without a doubt. A kiss, one simple action that will forever change my life.

  “Cassandra Blair Anderson! Lucas Isaiah Daniels!” We both stiffen at the sound of Dar’s voice. “I woke up terrified, Cass, because I didn’t know where you were. I go on a frantic search, only to find you here mauling each other. I haven’t even had a chance to pee yet.” She giggles. “Eh, as you were, kids.” She waves her hand in the air dismissively. “I’m going to get some coffee.” I look around Lucas to see Dar shaking her head as she goes out the door. She has always reminded me of the little sister I never had, especially after I lived with her family.

  My face flushes, and I peek up at Lucas through my eyelashes, suddenly too shy to speak. I swallow, trying to process everything that is happening, and I know my life will never be the same with or without him. I’m starting to forget how my life was before we were entwined like this. He is the first to put an end to the awkwardness between us, but maintains eye contact as he speaks. “Damn.” Lucas moans, seemingly out of breath. His eyes are burning with passion.

  “Damn.” I exhale as I try to catch my own breath.

  Lucas places a gentle touch of his lips on my forehead, then the tip of my nose, and then ever so lightly grazes my lips with his. “You are the calm of my storm, Cassandra.” He holds my gaze momentarily, the two of us nose-to-nose. That’s a lot to process after a first kiss, especially since I’m still hazy from its intensity. His breath is warm on my skin, rendering me speechless. “Then again…you know what?” He rolls his shoulders, and a smug grin spreads across his face. “You might be the cause.”

  Until that statement, I forgot how seemingly confident he is, despite the fact I have a feeling he will keep reminding me. Maybe he could use a blow to his ego, to bring his head down to a normal size. “Lucas, I know what I want to ask for my turn.” I take in a deep breath. “Was I dreaming, or did I see you lick your thumb after you wiped a tear off my cheek? Are you some type of stalker who gets off...”

  Lucas’ cheeks turn a light pink, and he cuts me off mid-sentence. “Next question, please,” he says, repeating my words from earlier, but answering my question without actually saying something. His eyes darken, and he bridges the gap between us as he presses his body against mine. He grazes my arms with his fingertips, slowly trailing from my shoulders to my wrists and then repeating the pattern. “Cassandra, before I met you, I hadn’t entertained the idea of getting to know anyone for quite some time, much less following them around.” Lucas leads my hands to the headboard and pins them with his own. “However…” He presses his forehead to mine and pauses long enough to torture me. “I am considering anything to keep you in bed, discussing your lips and the possibilities of getting off.”

  His voice drips with sex appeal. Each word sounds more erotic than the one before. My heartbeat quickens, but then I realize what he is doing. “Oh, hot damn, you’re embarrassed!” I squeal, and Lucas tightens his hold on my hands. He brushes his lips along my collarbone, and then I feel him smile against my skin.

  “Love, there are many things a man will admit to, but that isn’t one of them.” His voice sounds anxious, maybe even a little amused.

  “Okay, fine, Mr. Mysterious, I’ll ask another question, since apparently, you won’t answer the last one.” I grab my mug off the bedside table and bring it up to my mouth to put some distance between us. I take a drink of my coffee and then smack my tongue against the roof of my mouth, trying to rid it of that bitter coffee taste.
“Lucas...” I pause, trying to recall what Dar said the remainder of his name is. “Isaiah Daniels, you need to keep this in mind before you answer the next question. You said you would never lie to me again.” He nods, and I set the mug back down. “I think a man is just as good as his word, well, a person in general, not just the male population. That being said, you won’t hurt me, will you?”

  The expression on Lucas’ face is difficult to read as he is thinking about his answer. “I would be lying if I didn’t think I would ever hurt you. Hell, I’d be lying if I said that we’ll never fight. I can say I don’t like to see you in pain, no matter the cause. I may not know you well, but seeing Dartanya smack you last night pissed me off. It would crush me to know I was the cause of one ounce of your pain. So, I will do everything I can to prevent that from happening.” A dazzling smile broadens across his face, causing muscles in my stomach to clench.

  Lucas slides off the bed, taking my hand in his and pulling me behind him. He turns around and brings me in for a hug. I find myself closing my eyes and breathing in his scent. Lucas kisses me on the forehead and leaves his lips there as he speaks, “I have to see you again. Promise me I will?” I nod my head. “Unfortunately, I have something to do today. If not, I would invite you to stay, and I may never let you go. I’m afraid if I let you walk out my door that you won’t come back.” His voice is so gentle it’s almost a whisper, but I hear him clearly.

  I can’t deny I have feelings for him, but this is a lot to take in at once. Needing to put a little space between us, I untangle myself from Lucas and lead him by the hand toward the kitchen. “Lucas, I actually wouldn’t mind seeing you again.” My statement comes out sounding more like a question. I think it’s because I’m reassuring myself more than answering him.