Turning Up the Heat (Friends With Benefits)

by Tanya Michaels

  * * *

  THROUGH THE OVERHEAD SPEAKER, the captain announced that they were preparing for final descent into Atlanta. Phoebe stared forlornly out the window. Being so high in the air, unable to see the ground below, you could almost forget it was down there. But eventually, your time in the clouds came to an end and real life loomed larger and larger as it rushed up to meet you.

  Next to her, Heath tucked her hair behind her ear, craning his head for a better look at her face. “Everything okay? You’ve been uncharacteristically quiet the entire flight.”

  “Have I?” she murmured, wondering at his word choice. Uncharacteristic? She’d been soft-spoken her whole life and was generally the mild yin to Gwen’s boisterous yang. It was everything before today’s flight that had been out of character—an impulsive jaunt to Miami, casual sex, stripping off her bathing suit in a public pool.

  Phoebe liked that brave and brazen girl. But I don’t want to be her every day.

  At lunch on Monday, Cam had told her she’d changed. Those changes had been enough to make him want her again. And they’d worked on Heath, too—so much that he’d given their affair a stay of execution and left the door open for occasionally seeing each other again. A gambling woman might try to string together enough “occasionallys” to build a relationship, but then what?

  Sure, Heath enjoyed the Phoebe who wore expensive lingerie and gave balcony blow jobs. But how long could the Phoebe who sang show tunes while frosting cakes in her yoga pants hold his interest? His short attention span in romantic entanglements was legendary. The warning she’d received at the awards luncheon rang in her ears. You might think you’re going to be different, but trust me, honey, plenty of women thought that.

  She flashed him a brief smile, hoping it looked more genuine than it felt. He’d given her a lot these past few days—experiences she wouldn’t trade for anything in the world—and she didn’t want him to think she regretted them. Hadn’t that been his fear that first day, when he’d suggested they not have sex? “I’m being noble,” he’d said. Because he hadn’t wanted to hurt her when the affair inevitably ended. Time to show him she could be adult and mature about this.

  “I had a lot of fun in Miami,” she told him.

  He waggled his eyebrows at her. “If I didn’t already know your stance on airplane lavatories, I’d say we could still fit in a few more minutes of fun.”

  “Okay, first, ew. But, second...you shouldn’t make jokes like that anymore.”

  “Who was joking?”

  “I’m serious. A few weeks ago, I was hurting and feeling vulnerable after Cam left me and I turned to you. I wanted you to help me find out if I can be sexy—which I can—and I wanted to make Cam jealous, which we did. You promised me four nights and they were...unforgettable. But since we accomplished everything we set out to do, don’t you think it’s best to return to how things were?”

  CHAPTER 12

  HEATH WAS SO stunned by her words that he couldn’t form any of his own. The woman who had started the day snuggled against his chest was giving him the brush-off at twenty thousand feet? Thanks, Heath—you made me feel desirable and helped me win back the attention of my ex. You’re a pal. His knee-jerk reaction was outrage, but what had he expected? After all, he’d outlined those very objectives when persuading her to come to Miami. How could he blame her for taking him up on exactly what he’d offered?

  “Just to clarify.” He tried not to sound like a man who’d just been skewered with his own words. “By ‘how things were,’ you mean...?”

  “We’ll be friends, of course. I hope we’ll always be friends.” Her earnest tone made him want to snarl. “Platonic ones. I know what you said last night, but I’m not really cut out for the whole ‘benefits’ arrangement.”

  So his going out on a limb to find out if she might want more from him had meant nothing. He swallowed back a string of curse words, unaccustomed to being blindsided like this. Which is why you quit having messy emotional relationships, remember?

  “Besides,” Phoebe added, lowering her gaze and toying with a loose thread in the armrest, “we don’t want to get in each other’s way when it comes to, um, seeing other people.”

  Dread and disbelief roiled through him. Was she reconciling with Cam? Was that why she didn’t care whether she saw Heath again? They have history. All the two of you had was a few days of passion.

  White-hot, all-consuming, breath-stealing passion.

  This was far worse than when Tara had left him for Victor because it wasn’t some out-of-the-blue betrayal. No, Heath himself had damn well orchestrated this. Yet the thought of seeing her reunited with her ex, having to make small talk with them at parties and dinners, fighting not to imagine them together in private... His gut clenched, and he almost reached for an airsickness bag.

  Instead, he forced his expression into one of bland amiability. He wasn’t a monk, and he wasn’t pathetic. If his own love life stayed busy enough, he wouldn’t have time to dwell on Phoebe’s. “I couldn’t agree more. There are a lot of women whose calls I haven’t returned for the past few weeks. They’ll be glad to hear from me.”

  There was a little hitch in her breathing, but he suspected that was just a reaction to the plane’s lowering altitude. Because she sounded perfectly calm when she said, “Exactly.” Then she affectionately patted his hand, like he was her damn grandfather.

  They hit the ground with a squeal of wheels on pavement and the thump of landing gear. Not a moment too soon. If Heath didn’t get off the plane immediately, he might say something he really regretted. Like “please don’t leave me.”

  He might not have the girl—yet again—but he still had his pride and he intended to keep it intact.

  * * *

  NO TEARS, NO TEARS, no tears. Blinking fiercely, Phoebe kept up her silent mantra as she, Heath and Cam rode the escalator leading to the exit. The plan had been for Heath to drive her home, but she had no idea how she’d survive the ride. It had taken everything she had to smile brightly at him on the plane when he’d implied that he couldn’t wait to resume boinking a variety of women. Hell, if they’d had the same smitten flight attendant from their trip to Miami, he might not have even waited until they got off the plane. He could have joined that mile-high club. Assuming he wasn’t already a member.

  The thought left a sour taste in her mouth, which she knew was irrational. She’d been perfectly aware of Heath’s history before he’d ever kissed her. Before their time in Miami. Before she’d practically begged him to have sex with her. Oh, God. There was no way she could handle a car ride with him right now.

  As the three of them stepped off the escalator, she cleared her throat. “I was thinking...maybe I’ll grab a cab. Your loft is the opposite direction from my place.”

  Heath swiveled to look at her. “That’s ridiculous. Why would you pay for a cab ride when I said I’d take you home? That’s the kind of favor one friend does for another, right?” His subtle emphasis on friend had Cam raising his eyebrows.

  “Or I can drive her,” Cam said. “It’s on my way, more or less.”

  “Yeah,” Heath agreed. “I guess she is closer to you.”

  She was so relieved that she flashed Cam a brilliant smile. “Thank you so much!” With that solved, she strode eagerly toward the sliding doors, wanting to put this all behind her. “Heath, I don’t know when I’ll see you again—heaven knows I owe James a ton of overtime—so...”

  “Right.” He reached over to give her a one-armed hug. It was less contact than he gave his favorite restaurant customers, but it was enough of a reminder of their physical intimacy that her eyes burned. “I’ll be pretty busy, too. Take care of yourself, sweetheart.”

  She flinched hard at that. So much for being one of a kind. The tears were threatening in earnest now, so she didn’t even try to squeak out a goodbye, just gave him a curt nod and escaped outside.

  After a moment, Cam caught up to her—which was good, since she’d just realized she had no
idea where he was parked. She didn’t know where she was going, only that it needed to be away from Heath Jensen.

  “We’re back that way,” Cam said. She’d only heard that gentle tone from him once, when she’d gotten a lousy review from a food critic over a year ago. He hadn’t even sounded that sympathetic when he’d broken up with her. He waited until they were buckled into his car, then asked, “So you and Heath...?”

  “There is no me and Heath. And the less said about it, the better.”

  “Understood.” He turned the radio to her favorite station and didn’t say another word until they reached her apartment. Once in the parking garage, he popped the trunk open. “I’ll get your suitcase.”

  She was so despondent that she let him, not bothering to point out that it rolled and that she could easily get it herself. Nothing felt easy right now, not even inhaling and exhaling. Each breath was like a tiny shard caught in her lungs. At the top of the steps, she unlocked the front door and called out Gwen’s name. There was no answer, and Phoebe had mixed feelings about her friend’s absence. She didn’t particularly feel like being alone with her miserable thoughts right now, but she wasn’t ready to face the steaming platter of “I told you so” her roommate would no doubt be serving.

  “Do you want a cup of coffee?” she asked Cam impulsively. “Least I could do to say thanks for the ride.”

  “I’d love one.”

  She went into the kitchen, expecting him to have a seat at the table or on the bar stool, but he trailed after her. Breathing in the clean, sharp scent of his cologne was oddly disorienting; it should be familiar, perhaps giving her a sense of nostalgia. Instead, it was like hearing a song you used to really love and realizing you no longer remembered the words. But the aroma of coffee took over the kitchen as she ground fresh beans. After she added water to the pot and turned it on, Cam stepped closer, his expression pensive.

  “I don’t know if I should offer my apologies that things didn’t work out with you and Jensen...or if I should feel encouraged.”

  “Encouraged?”

  He reached for her in what she assumed was going to be a consoling hug, but then he cupped her shoulders and leaned toward her. “Dare I hope that I’m what caused the rift? That Heath sensed a connection still there between you and me? I want you back, Phoebe.” His eyes slid closed, and his face angled toward hers.

  “Oh, hell, no.” She shoved against his chest. “Is this why you offered to drive me home? To hit on me?”

  “I offered because I care about you,” he said, his expression all wounded confusion. “And I thought... Doesn’t matter. Clearly, I thought wrong.”

  She sighed. Oh, the irony of the day’s events. “Look, Cam, you know I was crazy about you, but you threw that away. You chose to move on. I didn’t have a choice, but I moved on, too.”

  “By sleeping with Heath.” His jaw clenched.

  “Don’t make me slap you. I’m a grown woman and I can sleep in whatever bed I want.”

  “Of course you can. Women’s rights, sexual equality—I’m all for them. I didn’t mean to sound angry at you. I’m mad at myself for putting you in this situation. And mad at him. That bastard knows you’re special, but he exploited—”

  “Cam, it’s sweet that you’re trying to be protective.” Weird, but sweet. In an archaic “this is none of your business” kind of way.

  He looked abashed. “Then, we’re really done?”

  “Really and truly.”

  “Oh.” His smile was lopsided, tinged with regret. “Maybe I’ll skip the coffee and just get going.”

  “Give me a few weeks to work through any ‘all men are scum’ feelings and maybe we can grab a cup of coffee. Or I can help you with new recipes,” she offered, feeling benevolent. “We have no future together, but, damn, you can cook.”

  “Thank you. And, Phoebe? For what it’s worth, you seemed happy in Miami. With him. I’m sorry it didn’t work out.”

  “Yeah.” Her vision blurred, and she swallowed hard. “So am I.”

  * * *

  “HEY, NEIGHBOR.”

  At the cheerful female voice, Heath turned from his mailbox to find the pretty brunette he frequently ran into at the building’s gym. “Jessa.”

  She looked at the stack of envelopes and magazines in his hands. “Someone’s popular. Or you just get a crap ton of bills—God knows I do,” she said with a laugh.

  “I was out of town.” He nodded toward the suitcase propped against the wall. “Just got back this afternoon.”

  “Then, you probably don’t have much in the way of groceries. Want to grab dinner?” she asked. “We always say we should, but since our schedules never seem to match up...”

  No, he didn’t want to grab dinner. He wanted to go upstairs and... What? Sulk? Recall the night he’d seared scallops for Phoebe and tried to convince her of how sexy she was? What would be the point? That sexy woman was probably with Cam at this precise moment. When Cameron had volunteered to give her a ride home, she’d lit up like Fourth of July fireworks, then practically sprinted from the airport.

  Heath had told her once that he wouldn’t judge her, but he was having difficulty living up to that promise. Because he thought she’d made an asinine decision. Cam hadn’t appreciated her, yet she’d taken him back? The chef didn’t deserve her. Oh, and you do? What had Heath added to her life besides orgasms that any top-of-the-line vibrator could duplicate?

  “Heath?” Jessa frowned, looking concerned. “Are you okay? If you’re tired from traveling, never mind about the dinner invitation. I—”

  “Actually, I would love to go.” He and Phoebe had agreed that their lives would return to normal. Spending time with beautiful women was Heath’s normal.

  It just wouldn’t be with the beautiful woman he wanted.

  * * *

  PHOEBE WASN’T SURE why she’d taken the detour on her way into work on Friday, but she’d had the sudden need to swing by Vivien’s Armoire. The lingerie store was just opening for the day, and the only person inside was the blonde who’d helped Phoebe before.

  Wren was arranging a display of boyfriend shorts and glanced up with a welcoming smile that warmed into an even more genuine greeting. “Hey, I remember you! How was...” She paused, frowning. “I want to say Florida?”

  “Miami. And it was great,” Phoebe said hollowly. Possibly the most fun she’d ever had in her life. In contrast, the past day and a half had been a bleak absence of fun.

  “Since you’re back,” Wren said knowingly, “I guess your friend liked the stuff you bought. We have some new items over there, and a sales rack by the fitting room.”

  “Thanks.” As Phoebe meandered between the racks of lace and satin, she realized why she’d come. She wanted to recapture some of the free-spirited person she’d been in Miami, even though there was no man in her life. I can buy pretty, provocative underwear just for my own enjoyment! Who cared if she didn’t have anyone to show it to? Yet despite the attempt at bolstering, she kept veering away from anything that reminded her of the pieces she’d packed for the trip. Instead, she found herself standing in the very back, looking at a wall of pajamas.

  “All set?” Wren asked as Phoebe approached the cash register.

  “Yep. I need to get to work myself, so this was just a quick trip.”

  “Well, come back any—” She blinked when she saw what Phoebe set on the counter. “Damn, I didn’t even know we carried flannel pajamas in June.”

  “They just look so soft. And comforting. Like a...” Her voice broke. “Like a hug.”

  Wren cocked her head to the side, her expression sympathetic. “So I guess Florida wasn’t actually ‘great?’”

  “No, the trip really was great.” Phoebe gave her a sad smile. “It’s returning to reality that sucks.”

  CHAPTER 13

  KNOWING THAT IT was important for the kitchen staff to respect Cam, Heath made it a point not to disagree with the chef in front of everyone else. In the privacy of the managerial
office, however, it was a different story. He loosened his tie, waiting for Cam to close the door behind him.

  “That was not the menu we agreed to tonight,” Heath said. There’d been more cost-effective ways to use the seafood, but Cam liked to concentrate on flavors rather than the budget. It was why they were partners. If Cam opened his own place, he’d be bankrupt inside a month.

  “I don’t remember us ‘agreeing.’” Cam stood with his arms folded, glaring down at Heath behind the desk that ate up most of the space in the small room. “What I remember is you barking orders at me.”

  “I’m doing my job.” In the past, Heath had always been able to lose himself in work. But his refuge seemed to be failing him at the moment. “You—”

  “It isn’t just me. You’ve been barking at everyone. Maybe you should rethink working front of house until your mood improves. The middle of the week is slow—take tomorrow night off and spend it with that brunette you’re seeing.”

  “You want me out of the way so you can cook whatever you feel like, to hell with the consequences. And, not that it’s your concern, but Jessa and I aren’t seeing each other. We went on a couple of dates. They weren’t leading anywhere.”

  Cam shot him a look of pure disgust. “So you got bored already, huh? Shocker.”

  “What is your problem? I took a nice lady out a few times, we had no chemistry and I won’t be calling her again.” That was all the information Cam needed about his love life. Heath didn’t share how, when she’d ordered sorbet after their last dinner, he’d all but faked an illness to cut the evening short. Sorbet reminded him of Miami. Of Phoebe.

  He couldn’t think about her yet. So what’s the plan? To give up desserts because they might remind him of his favorite pastry chef? To spend the rest of a hot Atlanta summer avoiding the pool because he wouldn’t be able to dive into the water without hearing the splash of her bikini bottoms next to him? He associated her with baseball and balconies and planes. Hell, he couldn’t look at the mirror hanging in his own living room without thinking about her. Maybe he should put it on Craigslist.