Beguiling the Earl
Page 14
Dinner was more difficult than she could have imagined. Their party was small, so there was no chance to engage Kerrick in private conversation. He sat across from her, but Louisa was between them at the foot of the table. Every word they spoke was, naturally, heard by her sister. The meal seemed to drag on forever, but Catherine told herself that surely she and Kerrick would be able to manage a conversation away from the others later in the evening.
When dinner was over and the men joined the women in the drawing room after staying behind to have their port, Catherine looked up eagerly. Kerrick’s gaze met hers and in them she saw something that made her pulse leap. He started to move toward her but was interrupted when Louisa stepped between them and captured his attention.
It didn’t take her long to realize that her sister was going to great lengths to ensure that she and Kerrick wouldn’t have the opportunity for even a moment of private conversation. She wanted to scream with frustration every time she turned around to find Louisa watching her, and whenever Kerrick approached her, or she him, her sister made a point of intercepting them.
“What are you doing?” she hissed to Louisa after dragging her into a corner of the room.
“I’m protecting you from yourself.” The stiff set of Louisa’s shoulders indicated that she was bracing herself for Catherine’s angry response.
She wasn’t sure how to reply. She understood the motivation behind her sister’s actions and was torn between frustration that Louisa still treated her like a child and sadness that her relationship with Kerrick must remain a secret. She was saved from having to answer, however, when Nicholas joined them. From his curious expression, it was clear he’d witnessed their exchange. It took every ounce of strength she possessed to turn and smile at her brother-in-law.
“I hope you aren’t overtiring yourself,” he said to Louisa, concern etched along his features.
The smile Louisa gave her husband contained more than a hint of indulgence. “Stop worrying, I am fine.”
Catherine couldn’t help but see the irony in her sister’s statement and was tempted to echo the words back to her with respect to Louisa’s concern about her feelings for Kerrick. She opened her mouth to do just that, but was interrupted when the duchess joined them.
“Miss Evans,” she said, tucking her hand around Catherine’s arm. “Lord Kerrick just told me that you are designing a new garden for the Worthingtons.”
“Yes, I am.” She ignored the look of concern that passed between Louisa and Nicholas.
“After our outing to Kew Gardens, I must confess that I am inspired to expand the gardens at our estate.” She paused for a moment before adding, “I don’t suppose you have any drawings of your plans? I was very impressed with your knowledge and am more than a little curious to see them.”
“I do have a few sketches, but I admit I’m not quite happy with them. I fear I am no Capability Brown.”
“I’m sure you are being modest. Would it be too much of an imposition to ask to see them?”
Catherine didn’t miss the gleam in the other woman’s eyes and suspected she did not merely wish to discuss gardens with her. Like Rose, and unlike her sister, she knew that the duchess hoped to facilitate a match between her and Kerrick. There was no other reason why she would have convinced her husband to help set up that private meeting in the carriage.
“They’re in the library. Did you want to see them now?”
“If you don’t mind,” the duchess said with a smile that seemed far too innocent.
Not waiting for her reply, she all but whisked Catherine from the room. As they made their way to the library, Catherine braced herself for the questions she knew were coming.
She didn’t have to wait long. After crossing the threshold, the duchess closed the door and turned to face her.
“How are things progressing between you and Lord Kerrick?”
Catherine walked over to the small desk where she kept the drawings she was working on. Her back to the duchess as she reached for the small stack of papers, she said, “We are friends.”
The duchess sighed. “I’d hoped that after your meeting in the carriage the two of you would have moved beyond friendship.”
Catherine turned to face her, the drawings clutched to her chest, and voiced the question that had been worrying her. “Do you think His Grace will tell Nicholas about that evening?”
“Not if he wishes to keep his head. I don’t think Overlea would be happy to learn that he helped to arrange a private meeting between his best friend and his young sister-in-law. He’s quite protective of you.”
Catherine released the breath she’d been holding. “I know. I hate to think how protective he’ll be if Louisa has a girl.”
The duchess eyed her closely. “Rumors are circulating… Kerrick is expected to ask for Rose Hardwick’s hand in marriage any day now.”
Catherine had to force herself not to look away when she replied. “I’m afraid those rumors might be true.”
“How can you be so calm? If that is true then he has treated you abominably.”
Unable to hold the woman’s gaze, she looked away. She didn’t have to feign her emotions when she said, “I won’t lie and say the thought of he and Rose marrying leaves me feeling more than a little ill. You know I care for him, as does my sister. In fact, I fear the entire world knows it.” She winced and rushed to add, “But Lord Kerrick has not behaved inappropriately.”
To keep the duchess from questioning her further, Catherine knew she was going to have to lie outright. “I fear Kerrick sees me only as Louisa’s little sister. He wants to do something nice for her and Nicholas after the baby is born. That’s why he wanted to speak to me in private—so no one would learn about his plans.”
It was clear the duchess didn’t believe her. “And what is it he’s planning?”
“I can’t betray his confidence. You’ll have to learn of it when the others do.”
The duchess seemed to consider her words for a moment before speaking. “Perhaps I can help.”
Catherine closed her eyes for a moment, not bothering to hide her frustration. It would seem that the entire world was aligned together in throwing obstacles in the way of Kerrick’s investigation. She couldn’t blame the duchess, however. How could she know that the only way for her and Kerrick to be together was to allow him to continue to grow closer to another woman?
“I wish you wouldn’t,” she said, meeting the duchess’s concerned gaze head-on. “I know your heart is in the right place, and I do thank you, but this entire situation is already more than a little difficult for me.”
Catherine could tell the duchess didn’t want to let the matter drop, but instead she reached for the drawings that Catherine still held clutched to her chest. Relieved, Catherine handed them to the other woman.
The remainder of the evening passed quickly. When she and the duchess returned to the drawing room, Louisa was playing at the pianoforte and the men were discussing some new horseflesh they’d seen at Tattersall’s. Catherine made a mental note to let Kerrick know that he had to plan something special for the arrival of Louisa and Nicholas’s first child so the duchess wouldn’t know she’d been lied to.
She questioned whether she’d ever have that opportunity. When she retired for the evening, she was beyond frustrated. She’d spent the entire evening in Kerrick’s company, but the only private exchange they’d had was after his arrival when they’d shared a few words.
Catherine mulled over her situation as her maid helped her out of her dress and into her nightgown. So engrossed was she in her own thoughts that it wasn’t until she was seated at her dressing table that she noticed her maid was strangely silent. Normally Lily liked to chatter, but she hadn’t said a word as she removed the pins from Catherine’s hair.
She turned in her seat to face the young woman. “You are very quiet this evening, Lily.”
Her maid looked away and seemed to wrestle with herself before speaking. “I’m so sorry, Miss Evans.”
&
nbsp; Guilt flickered over the other woman’s face and the breath froze in Catherine’s lungs as her mind leapt to the worst possible scenario. “Who did you tell?” she finally managed.
Lily appeared confused. “Tell?”
“About my visit to Lord Kerrick’s town house. Who did you tell?”
Her maid shook her head vehemently. “Oh no, I didn’t tell anyone. I promised not to.”
The tightness in her chest eased a bit. “Then what are you sorry for, Lily?”
The woman hesitated a moment before reaching into the pocket of her uniform and pulling out a folded note. “The footman gave me this note to give to you. He said it was from Her Grace, but the handwriting seemed like it was written by a man. I wasn’t sure if I should give it to you.”
It was clear her maid was having some misgivings about agreeing to keep her mistress’s secrets. Catherine kept her tone even when she replied. “Do you trust me to know what I am doing?”
That was the crux of the matter. Did Lily see her as a flighty young girl acting impetuously, chasing after a man who was unavailable?
“If Lady Overlea finds out—”
“Nothing will happen to you, Lily. My sister knows me well enough to know that I can be very stubborn when it comes to getting what I want. If she learns of my… activities… and blames anyone, it will be me. I’ll make sure that nothing happens to you.”
“And what about you, Miss Catherine? Who will make sure that nothing happens to you?”
Catherine held her hand out for the note. When Lily released her tight hold on it, she smiled at the young woman. “I will. You and I both know that Lord Kerrick would do nothing to anger Lord Overlea.”
That wasn’t strictly the truth, but the words seemed to give Lily some comfort. Catherine ached to dismiss her and read the note, but if she expected her maid to believe she was a capable young woman with a good head on her shoulders, she was going to have to act the part—no matter how much it killed her to wait.
Catherine turned back to the mirror, placed the note on her dressing table, and waited for her maid to finish taking down her hair and brushing it out. Finally, after what seemed an eternity, Catherine bade the woman good night and watched her leave the room.
Her hands were almost shaking when she turned the note over. It was sealed and across the front her name was written in a bold scrawl. Catherine broke the seal and unfolded the paper. Her eyes eagerly scanned the few words that were written there.
I am doing all that I can to conclude the matter we discussed. Please do not give up hope.
I miss you.
—K
Catherine clutched the note to her chest. It was a poor substitute for Kerrick’s presence, but it was all she had of him.
ooOoo
Catherine slept later than normal the following morning. Since her sister’s pregnancy meant that Louisa had difficulty keeping food down in the morning, and since Nicholas tended to hover over his wife most mornings, they rarely went downstairs for breakfast. Catherine had, therefore, started asking for a breakfast tray to be brought to her room. She rang for her maid to bring up her customary tea and toast, but when the young woman arrived she informed Catherine that Rose had called was waiting for her in the drawing room.
Lily helped her dress quickly while Catherine tried to remember if she’d made plans to go shopping with Rose that morning. She’d had so much on her mind of late that she wouldn’t be surprised to learn she’d forgotten.
When she entered the drawing room ten minutes later, she could tell immediately that Rose was upset. She sat perched on the edge of the settee, her hands clenched in her lap as she stared off into space.
Catherine crossed the room and sat next to her friend. “I thought that perhaps I had forgotten another one of your excursions to Bond Street, but from the look on your face I can see that isn’t the case. I’m almost afraid to ask what has happened.”
Rose glanced to the doorway to make sure they were alone before replying. “My parents think I have an early appointment with the dressmaker and don’t know I’ve come to see you.”
“I assume you led them to believe that, but I don’t understand why.”
“It’s simply dreadful, Catherine. Apparently Father has been hearing rumors about Lord Kerrick spending so much time here.”
Rose’s concern confused her. “It is hardly a secret that he and my brother-in-law are the best of friends. Everyone knows that. Why should it matter if he occasionally has dinner here?”
“It’s because of you. Father thinks that Kerrick is playing me for a fool and that it is you he means to marry.”
Catherine turned away and shook her head as she struggled to hide the panic that was beginning to rise at her friend’s words.
“You already know how I feel,” Rose said when Catherine didn’t reply. “I hope fervently that what he says is true. But Father is very angry about it and he has forbidden me from seeing you again. If you can imagine, he believes you are using me to get closer to Lord Kerrick. I fear he would never forgive me if he learned that I am doing everything in my power to promote the match.”
“You shouldn’t say such a thing—”
“Whyever not? I’ve seen the way he looks at you, and it is clear I am not the only person who has noticed.”
Catherine felt as though she were being ripped in two. She hated lying to her friend, especially since it was clear that Rose was no fool and could see for herself how she and Kerrick felt despite their attempts to hide it. That others were beginning to notice was a disaster. The very last thing she wanted was to betray Kerrick’s trust in her. She couldn’t be the reason his inquiries failed or he would never again trust her. And if she lost his trust, would he continue to care for her?
She wanted to believe he loved her as much as she did him, but she couldn’t quiet that niggling voice that told her she could be easily replaced. Kerrick was by no means an old man—he was only nine-and-twenty—but he was more experienced than her. He was a man of the world and she knew he’d had lovers. How realistic would it be to believe he wouldn’t be able to replace her in a heartbeat?
She had to choose her words carefully or her very perceptive friend would know she was lying.
“Kerrick and I are just friends.”
Rose shook her head in exasperation. “Are you trying to convince me or yourself? Lord Kerrick and I are not yet betrothed. If you would exert yourself a little, allow him to see how you truly feel about him, I know in my heart that he would give up his ridiculous courtship of me. I don’t understand why you don’t at least try.”
“I am afraid, Rose. Afraid that my feelings for Kerrick will only end in heartbreak.” And that, at its core, was the earth-shattering truth. The one she tried not to think about as she struggled to push away her doubts.
“I think my father means to press him to declare his intentions soon.”
A stab of panic went through Catherine. “Would he really do that?
Rose nodded solemnly. “I believe so. I know he’s always desired a match between us—Mama is very good friends with his mother and when I was young they often talked about how wonderful it would be to unite our families. But lately it’s not just a wish. He seems almost desperate for a match between us.”
Catherine hadn’t wanted to believe that Lord Worthington had committed whatever crime it was that Kerrick was investigating, but Rose’s confusion about her father’s unusual behavior was setting off internal alarm bells.
She tried to keep her voice even as she asked, “Is there a reason for this change?”
“Not that I can think of,” Rose said with a small shake of her head. “Hoping to ease the way for you and Kerrick, I told Father that I didn’t want to marry him.”
Catherine winced inwardly as she imagined how Kerrick would react to that news. “What did he say to that?”
“He wouldn’t hear of it. He told me that I had to make sure to hold Lord Kerrick’s favor. But worse than the fact that my father do
esn’t care if I have any feelings for my future husband was the look in his eyes. I was going to press the issue, but something in Father’s eyes frightened me. He looked afraid.”
“Of what?” Catherine asked, finding that she had to work to keep her breathing even.
“I don’t know. We aren’t having money problems… We were until recently, but Father came into some sort of inheritance. And let us be frank—I could align myself with any number of men, some with titles much more prestigious and estates far wealthier than Lord Kerrick’s.”
“But not the man you really want.”
“No,” Rose said, and Catherine could see that she was trying to put on a brave face. “He might as well be a figment of my imagination for how likely I am to be noticed by him. I daresay I’ll forget about him in time. He’s far too old for me anyway.”
Catherine’s curiosity was piqued, but from Rose’s closed expression she knew her friend had no intention of sharing anything further about the mysterious man. It was only then that Catherine realized just how stressful this situation was on her friend as well. She’d been so wrapped up in her own worries that she hadn’t fully given thought to the pressure Rose was facing. And if her father was guilty of any wrongdoing, the repercussions she faced would likely lead to her ruin. Just thinking about it threatened to make her breathless with dread.
“I’m not sure what I can say or do that would make this whole situation easier,” Catherine said.
“There’s nothing you can do. I just wanted to let you know that I won’t be allowed see you for a little while. And if Lord Kerrick does propose and I deny him…” A shudder went through her. “To be honest, I’m not sure Father would actually allow me to do so. One way or another, this situation must come to an end soon.”
Rose stood and Catherine followed her to the door. After saying their good-byes, she returned to her bedroom to pen a note to Lord Kerrick. She had to warn him about what was coming with Lord Worthington, but she also had to be careful about how she worded the note lest someone else see it. In the end, she decided the situation was urgent enough to warrant her use of the code they had devised that would tell him she needed to see him right away. Impatient, she took a sheet of paper from her small lap desk, dipped her quill in a bottle of ink, and wrote one word—Daffodils.