Claimed By Chaos

by Abigail Graves

  “You don’t really expect any of us to discuss Lady St. Claire or Alastair’s private affairs, do you?” Madeline replied. Lady Gasden narrowed her eyes as she looked to Maman.

  “I can’t believe you never mentioned anything about any of this, Celine!” She scolded. Maman looked at her sternly.

  “I consider the trust of those I care for to be priceless. When I am given a secret to keep, I take it very seriously. I’m sure you can appreciate that, Patrice.” She held her gaze for several moments. Gilles frowned. What is going on here? He wondered. Lady Gasden nodded.

  “Yes. You’ve always been a good friend.” She sighed as she finished her tea. “Tell me, is she anything like her mother?” She asked. Gilles smiled. He knew what she was hinting at.

  “I have been told that she is very much like her mother.” He watched as her expression softened and she laughed gently.

  “This shall be a pleasure to watch, then. Alastair is going to have his hands full and the ton isn’t going to be pleased that he was able to steal a march on the incomparable of the decade.” Lady Gasden waited for him to confirm or deny her statement but he remained passive. “I’m not certain that I would consider Mirabelle Haviland a suitable chaperone.” She announced as she gathered her shawl around her.

  “Why would Lady St. Claire need a chaperone? She’s with my sister and her husband. Who would imagine there would be any likelihood of something scandalous happening?” Gilles asked with an impossibly straight face. Lady Gasden laughed.

  “Anyone acquainted with your sister. You needn’t worry, I won’t say anything about you or your brother and Lady St. Claire.” She tried to rise and Gilles stood to help her to her feet. She patted his hand. “You have good children, even that Lucien.” Lady Gasden said softly as The Mothers leaned in to kiss her cheek. They saw her to the door as Gilles took the seat next to Elise. She leaned against him and he wrapped his arm around her.

  “I think that went remarkably well!” Maman announced as she returned and settled into her seat. Madeline nodded as she sat next to her. Gilles pretended not to notice that Madeline took Maman’s hand and squeezed it.

  “Thank you.” She whispered. Maman leaned affectionately against her for a moment.

  “Always, Maddy.” She said softly.

  Gilles wasn’t sure what had just passed between them but he felt Elise soften and she sighed silently.

  Chapter 25

  “I have money.” Giselle knew her words were slurring. LeVan smiled and pointed at her horse.

  “Show me.” He ordered. She didn't want to turn away from him, she was sure that he would shoot her as soon as she did but there was nothing she could do. She had been so focused on staying upright in the saddle, then dismounting and not falling on her face that she hadn't even grabbed a knife before she walked toward him. Giselle cursed herself for being so stupid. She was totally unarmed, she had no business being there.

  The only thing she could do was try to reach her horse before he could fire. The rain worked in her favor but if LeVan was responsible for killing so many operatives, he was probably smart enough to take it into account as well.

  Giselle turned to run. She felt the sand and the weight of her wet clothes pulling at her, slowing her down and she tensed in expectation. He should have fired by now. She never got more than a few steps away before she heard the crack and felt herself thrown onto the sand. She blinked and looked at the beach and then up at the sky. The rain had stopped and the waves had receded. She turned and screamed as Alastair raised his arm and fired a pistol directly at her chest. Giselle reached for him as she felt herself fly backward.

  She sat up, gasping as her heart pounded in her chest. She was warm and dry, in Alastair’s bed. Giselle looked at the window and saw that it was open and the curtains fluttered gently. She reached to her left and felt empty bed beside her before she heard movement.

  She turned her head and opened her mouth to yell but nothing came out as LeVan raised a pistol and stepped into the weak moonlight. He looked as he did when she saw him last. His skin was gone and his chest and abdomen hung open. Blood and fluids poured down his legs and he swayed drunkenly. He smiled as the end of the muzzle flashed and thunder exploded in the room.

  Giselle felt her body jump as her eyes snapped open. Her chest heaved and she was shaking. Alastair's arms closed tightly around her and he pressed her head against his chest as he made a shushing sound.

  “You're alright. I won't let anything happen to you.” He whispered. She felt the tension leaving her body and she pushed the fear away. Just dreams. She thought as she breathed deep, pulling his warmth and scent into her. Alastair's eyes, as they had been on the beach, haunted her. They were empty and cold. Giselle squeezed her eyes shut and waited until they faded. His hand stroked her back, soothing her. “What was it?” He asked softly. She hesitated, not wanting to put words to what she had seen. “Was it the night you were shot?” She nodded and pushed away to sit up.

  Giselle looked at the door. She felt cold and afraid, she needed to get out. She swallowed and tried to think of a reason she could give him to leave. Alastair sat up and stroked her hair as he leaned close. The temptation to lean against him was so strong but she was too scared. More scared of how good it would feel to let him comfort her than she was of the memory of that night or the dreams. His lips caressed her shoulder and panic rippled through her. She had never allowed herself to fear a man but suddenly, she was terrified.

  “Giselle?” Alastair must have felt her tense. He turned her to face him and brushed her hair from her face. His hand cradled her cheek as his eyes searched her face. “Tell me what happened.” His voice was hard but it was a plea. Giselle shivered at the thought of thinking and speaking about it but he stared so intently, with such concern that she couldn't deny him.

  “I said that I had money in my bag, I needed to get to it so I could get to my knives or pistols. LeVan told me to go to it. I saw it in his eyes, I knew he was going to try to kill me but all I could do was try to get to my bag first. I couldn't do that without turning my back to him. As soon as I did, I heard him fire and was thrown forward onto the sand.” Alastair closed his eyes and his head fell forward. She could barely breath and her palms felt slick. Giselle took a deep breath and continued. “The pain was tremendous. I couldn't move. I heard him approach and I did my best to remain as still as I could and prayed he didn't shoot me again to make sure I was truly dead. By then, the tide had reached me and I was soaked and becoming numb. He stepped over me and searched my bag. He found nothing and kicked sand in my face as he passed on his way back to his horse. I watched the water around me turn pink and then red as I listened and waited for him to mount and ride off. I waited for a few minutes before I slowly began to move and carefully looked to see if he was gone. As soon as I was sure it was safe, I pulled the shawl from around my neck and tied it around my chest as tight as I could to try and stop the bleeding. I knew I had lost a lot of blood and didn't have the strength to get back on my horse. Then, I heard a rider in the distance. I thought he was coming back to make sure I was dead. I slipped out of my cloak, it was already too heavy. I had no choice but to swim.” Alastair gasped. “I crawled out as far as I could and let go of my cloak hoping he'd see it and think I was under it. I pulled myself into the tide and let the current carry me, it was strong and the water was freezing. At first, everything hurt, I was nothing but pain and I couldn't pull in enough air whenever I could get my face out of the water. The numbness took over quickly and I tried so hard to fight off the drowsiness. I've never felt so weak, so tired. I don't know how long I hung on, every moment felt like an eternity. All I could hear was my heartbeat as I drifted. It became so slow, I would forget how long it had been since I had heard it last. When I finally felt myself slipping away, I was certain I was dying.”

  “I think that it might have been the freezing water that saved you.” Alastair said softly. “From the location of your wound, you probabl
y would have bled to death before Gilles reached you.” He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, tentatively as their bodies connected. Giselle felt him relax and he pulled her tighter. She felt safe yet exposed. The urge to cry was overwhelming. She clenched her jaw and squeezed her eyes shut as she waited for it to pass. When she trusted her voice she pulled away.

  “I dreamt that LeVan was in the room. You weren’t here and he shot me.” Her voice wavered as she recalled the rest of the dream. She couldn't tell him. His brows pulled together and he frowned.

  “Are you worried that he's still alive and he’ll come after you?” His voice was a deep rumble as he rubbed a strand of her hair between his fingers. Giselle shook her head and he looked up, into her eyes. Part of her didn't want Alastair to know how much hatred and violence she was capable of while the rest of her felt that he deserved to know exactly what she was. She needed Alastair to see how beneath him she was, that she would never be suitable. Giselle couldn't make the mistake of hoping he would truly want to marry her. If she started hoping, she would start wanting and this life wasn't meant for her.

  “There is no way LeVan is alive. I kept him on the verge of death for three days until I was sure he had given me everything and I was satisfied he had suffered enough.” Giselle waited for his disappointment or disapproval. Instead, he nodded.

  “What did you do to him?” His expression was curious, understanding. It won't last, not once he knows everything. She thought. She had never felt shame or regret for the things she had done for her country but for once, Giselle wished there was less to tell. She couldn't spare him, it was better for both of them if he knew it all. She sighed as she leaned forward and kissed him briefly. One last time, while he still thought she was human. She let her lips cling for a moment before she pulled away and looked down at her hands. Will they look different to him after this? She wondered.

  “I flayed him. Strip after strip of his flesh for every agent he killed until he could tell me nothing more. Then, I cut him open so he could feel my hands pulling his insides out. I ripped his heart from his chest and he watched it beat for a few seconds before he died. I threw it in the fire and watched it burn. He was living on a small farm. When I was done, I left the door opened so the pigs could have him.” When Giselle looked up she didn't find anything she expected. Instead, Alastair was thoughtful and pleased. She blinked in surprise as he pulled her to him and buried his face in the corner of her neck as he pulled her with him to the pillows.

  “Good. I was worried he didn't die as he deserved.” He said as he kissed her forehead. Giselle pressed her face to his chest to hide her frown. She saw Alastair raise the pistol and fire and she shut her eyes. Fear bloomed within her. It was just a dream but she couldn't help but be afraid that Alastair was going to kill her. Not as he had in her dream. He wouldn't use a gun, he would destroy the person she had been and make her want everything she couldn't have. Once more, Giselle cleared her mind. She shut the fear and longing out and wallowed in blankness until she fell asleep.

  Chapter 26

  “I think you'll do!” Giselle murmured. “You're a big, handsome boy.” She stroked his mane as she looked around. Finding herself alone, she poked around the stable until she found everything she needed. She couldn't help but be impressed. Lucien's stable was as large, clean and as well appointed as some of the homes and chateaus she had stayed in. His horses were gorgeous and lived in luxury.

  Once she had the stallion saddled Giselle led him into the yard and put her foot into the stirrup as she pulled herself up. She heard yelling and looked toward the paddock to see Alastair and Lucien sprinting toward her. She turned in the saddle, looking to see what had them alarmed. Finding nothing of concern, she waited until they reached her. Lucien grabbed the reins and Alastair reached for her waist. Giselle slapped their hands away.

  “What’s gotten into you two!” She scolded. “You'll spook him!”

  “Get off before he throws you.” Alastair ordered. She felt her temper stir and she shook her head. Lucien nodded in agreement.

  “No one rides Lucifer except Gilles. Half of my people have had something broken on their bodies after trying to handle him. Let me get you a different horse.” He said as he attempted to grab the reins again. Giselle pulled them out of his reach and wheeled Lucifer away. Alastair cursed and tried to stay in front of him.

  “Please. Don't do this.” His eyes begged her. She shook her head.

  “I wish you'd stop acting like I don't know what I'm doing. I'm not getting off this horse, Alastair.” With that, she turned the stallion toward the park. Giselle kicked and set Lucifer off and at a trot. He moved swiftly, smoothly. She looked over her shoulder to see Alastair running into the stable. She leaned down and urged Lucifer on. He surged and flew across the field. Dressed in breeches, she was able to lean low and she hugged his neck. She laughed as the wind whipped at her hair.

  After the unsettling events the night before, Giselle felt tense and unsure of herself when she woke up. When she looked out her window and saw Alastair and Lucien in the paddock, she knew a long, fast ride was exactly what she needed. Preferably alone, so she could enjoy the exhilaration and ride out some of her anxieties without distraction.

  It looked as if Alastair wasn't going to allow it, he was coming on fast. Giselle smiled and yelled for Lucifer to run faster as she turned him toward open fields so he could have his head. She looked back and was surprised to see that Alastair was only a length away. She sensed that he was no longer concerned, he was low in the saddle, urging his mount to overtake her.

  The horses were neck and neck as they started to run out of field and approached the forest. Giselle slowed Lucifer and turned him into a narrow clearing as Alastair came alongside her.

  “Do you have any idea how scared we were? Lucifer is a mean son of a bitch, you could have broken your neck.” He complained. As if he understood, Lucifer snorted and shook his head. Giselle laughed softly.

  “But I didn't and Lucifer seems to like me.” Giselle leaned down and patted his neck. “I think you're a darling!” She crooned. Alastair was rolling his eyes when she sat up.

  “This does solve a problem, though. I have to get him back to London and expected him to be difficult. Would you mind riding him back?” He watched her out of the corner of his eye as he steered them down a path that was just wide enough for them to fit side by side. Giselle smiled as she looked around.

  “Not at all! Something tells me Lucifer won’t want me riding sidesaddle. I’ll have to wear breeches.” She looked at Alastair and couldn't help but smile as he frowned.

  “You’ll have to go in disguise and we’ll have to keep our stops brief.” His eyes swept over her and narrowed. “Can you pass for a boy?” Giselle felt her lips curve.

  “I have done so many times. It will be fun.” She promised. “Although we might have a problem if you keep looking at me like that while we’re traveling.” The way his eyes kept tracing her thighs and derrière, he’d give her away or people would assume he had a taste for young boys. His eyes flicked to her face and Giselle felt her breath catch in her throat. He looked wild and hungry. The urge to appease his need was overwhelming.

  She leaned toward Alastair as he reached for her. He pulled her into his lap as his mouth claimed hers. Giselle pressed her chest against his and clung to his shoulders. She felt a hand close around her bottom as the other cupped her breast. His thumb found her nipple through the fabric of her blouse and chemise and brushed against it. She pulled her lips from his on a gasp and felt his tongue slide down her throat.

  Alastair’s hands closed around her waist and he lifted her so that she could swing her leg over and sit astride, facing him. Giselle moaned as she felt his erection pressing against her womanhood. His hands lifted and pulled her against him and she gasped. He repeated the motion, urging her to continue. She felt wet heat explode between her thighs and she shut her eyes as she rocked against him.

 
“There will be nothing fun about a day in the saddle with an aching cock. All I’ll be able to think about is tearing these damned breeches off of you and burying myself in your sweet, tight body.” He growled the words against her skin as he flicked the buttons of her blouse open. Giselle felt him tug the ribbon of her chemise and then cool air against her breasts. “Even if you manage to hide yourself, I’ll still be picturing your breasts and I’ll still want to taste them.” She felt the words against her nipple before he closed his lips around it and began to suckle hungrily.

  Giselle let her head fall back as his hand squeezed her other breast, rolling her nipple between his fingers. She felt the hand at her bottom pushing her harder against him and the tension within her began to tighten as she gasped for air. Alastair lifted his head and watched his hand as it stroked her breasts. When he looked up at her, his eyes were dark and his face was taut.

  “There is no way for you to comprehend what your body does to me. I don’t need to see it to want you. The smell of you, the heat and the taste of your flesh, the sounds you make when you come, everything about your body destroys me.” Alastair’s fingers wrapped around her neck, pulling her close so his lips could part hers and his tongue could explore her mouth. Giselle gripped his shoulders and she continued to writhe against him as he angled his face and took their kiss deeper. Both of his hands worked at her breasts, kneading and pinching, stroking and squeezing. She pulled her mouth from his and struggled for breath as she felt her muscles lock. Alastair’s lips found her ear and she felt the heat of his breath as he whispered.

  “Let go. Come for me, my love.” His tongue brushed her lobe and she flew apart. His arms closed around her as she arched and shook violently. “So beautiful.” Alastair whispered as he pressed his lips to her throat.

  When Giselle was able to sit up on her own, Alastair lifted her to her saddle. Once she was ready, he guided her back to Winthorpe. For some reason, she could think of nothing to say and Alastair seemed content to watch her. She suspected he was still waiting for Lucifer’s mood to change. He noticed her watching him out of the corner of her eye and he frowned. She turned and raised a brow.