SAVING GRACE: GODS OF CHAOS MC (BOOK SIX)

by Honey Palomino

  “Those must be the best fed dogs in the city,” I mused, as we followed Snake into the clubhouse.

  “You’d never know it,” he replied. “Seems like no matter how much I feed them, they always want more. Where’s your other guy?”

  “Nate?” I asked. “Caught him sampling the merchandise, so to speak. This is Eli.”

  “Isn’t that one of the perks of the job?” Snake asked.

  “Not on my time, it isn’t,” I said.

  “Right, you don’t mix business and pleasure,” he teased.

  “That’s right,” I said. “I like to keep things simple.”

  “Got it,” he replied. “Well, nice to meet you Eli.”

  “You too,” Eli nodded.

  They shook hands and we walked into the clubhouse, the sound of Led Zeppelin pouring out of the speakers, the dim roar of laughter and chattering voices filling our ears.

  We walked back to the same booth we’d sat at before and Bear brought over a bottle again. Snake sipped his whiskey slowly, leaning back and looking around at the bar.

  “Been here a long fucking time,” he said, wistfully. He glanced over at me. “How long you been in this business, Grace?’

  “A few years,” I replied.

  “You ever get tired of it?”

  “I never get tired of making money,” I said. “But it can be a drain on your senses, sure. I’m not heartless.”

  “Oh, I don’t mean it that way,” Snake shrugged. “I sleep like a rock every night. I don’t have any guilt about it, not anymore at least. Maybe I’m the heartless one. What I was asking is, don’t you get tired of the constant hustle? Don’t you ever just wanna run away to a fucking desert island or something? Get away from it all?”

  “Sounds like you need a vacation, Snake,” I said with a smile.

  He chuckled.

  “Yeah, maybe you’re right,” he said. “Actually, it’s about time for a little week long retreat I usually take with the boys, but even that isn’t exciting me these days.”

  “You depressed?” I asked, lifting a brow.

  “Hell no,” he said. “Just tired, is all.”

  “It’s okay to admit it,” I said lightly, “even Tony Soprano had a therapist.”

  He burst out laughing, shaking his head.

  “Good thing you’re a female, Grace,” he said. “If one of my guys suggested I see a shrink, I’d have to knock him out just on principle.”

  I laughed and shook my head.

  “No offense intended,” I said, “just trying to be helpful.”

  “None taken,” he said, laughing softly, before pouring a shot and downing it. “Ain’t nothing wrong with me that a bottle of Beam can’t fix.”

  “I hear that,” I said, grabbing the bottle and pouring a shot for myself and then one for Eli. Eli hesitated, but he downed his quickly and I looked back at Snake. He was staring over at me pensively, his eyes soft. I suspected he was starting to like me a little, and while I needed him to trust me, the last thing I needed was to have to stave off his advances. I needed to make sure I wasn’t left alone with him. I looked over at Eli, and was pleased to see he was calm and poised as ever.

  “So, you wanna pick your girls today?” Snake asked.

  “Does this mean you still trust me?” I said.

  “You seem alright, I guess,” he shrugged playfully.

  “Fantastic,” I said. “I’ll choose a few tonight and come back tomorrow with the cash.”

  “Sounds good,” he said. “Let’s head over.”

  I nodded, bracing myself for the worst part of this whole job. We strolled over to the other building under a clear, starry night. The air was cold and crisp, but I didn’t feel the chill at all. I realized I was numbing myself, disassociating from my feelings, practically disconnecting from my feelings completely, like unplugging a fuse or flipping a switch. But I let it happen. I needed it to happen.

  Otherwise, I’d break down in front of everyone. Snake, Eli, all the girls and women I was about to have to face.

  Disconnecting for a moment was the only way I knew how to get through it. It didn’t lessen my rage, it didn’t mean I didn’t care. It meant I cared so fucking much there was no way I could embrace that passion and look them in the eye at the same time without dissolving into a pathetic, useless puddle in front of them.

  And that was not what these women needed.

  They needed someone to be strong, in ways that they couldn’t.

  They needed fierce determination and relentless motivation.

  They didn’t need feelings, or thoughts and prayers, or pity.

  They needed action.

  And me turning everything off and building a wall around my heart for just a little while, acting like a monster myself to get them away from the monster that was imprisoning them was my way of taking action.

  They’d hate me now.

  But they’d understand later.

  So, by the time Snake threw open the door at the end of that hallway again, I was ready. My face was set in stone, my eyes were stoic and uncaring, my heart was hard and encased in steel.

  When their voices fell silent and their eyes landed on us again, I stood in front of them, an invisible warrior in their battle for survival.

  “How do you wanna do this?” Snake asked.

  “I’ll just walk around and choose a few to talk to,” I said, “if that’s okay?”

  “Sure,” he shrugged. He and Eli stood by the door as they all watched me slowly walk through the maze of mattresses and women and girls. I met each of their eyes, hoping like hell they could somehow read my mind and know that I wasn’t there to hurt them, no matter how it appeared.

  There must have been three dozen women and huddled in the corner together were three very young girls. I stopped in front of them, and crouched down, staring into their eyes, attempting to look past the brokenness and find just a glimmer of hope there.

  “Who are you?” one of the girls asked me.

  “Hi, honey, I’m Grace,” I said. “What’s your name?”

  “Sadie,” she replied. “These are my friends, Fiona and Lucy.”

  “Are you here to take me home?” Fiona asked. She had long, stringy blonde hair, her small frame so fragile and tiny. Her eyes were sky blue, wide and innocent and naive.

  I shook my head slowly.

  “No,” I replied.

  “Oh,” she said, her eyes falling away. “It’s almost Christmas…”

  “Do you know when we can go home?” Lucy asked. She was a tiny girl with long, black hair and small black eyes that seemed to peer right into my soul. “I haven’t seen my Mom in a long time.”

  “I don’t know,” I whispered.

  “Why are you here?” Sadie asked.

  “Just visiting right now,” I said, shaking my head. How in the hell could I explain this to a child?

  I nodded and stood up, swallowing hard and blinking a few times. I was on the verge of cracking, my steely resolve threatening to betray me completely. I wanted to say so much to them. I wanted to pull them into my arms and tell them everything was going to be okay.

  Soon.

  “I’ll see you again real soon,” I whispered to them before turning away. Dozens of eyes followed me around the room. I walked slowly, counting heads, taking it all in. By the time I returned to the front of the room where Snake and Eli were standing, I’d counted thirty-seven women and the three girls. It was going to take a long time to get them all out. Snake was making a lot of money and he wasn’t about to just give up his entire revenue stream all at once.

  I met Eli’s gaze and saw the pain in his dark blue eyes. He’d likely never seen anything like this before and I wondered how it was effecting him. Outwardly, he appeared as solid and unshaken as before he walked in, as long as you didn’t look too closely. Apparently, Snake only had eyes for me, because he was staring me down hard.

  “So?”

  “Can we talk outside?”

  “Sure,” he said
, leading the way. The door closed behind us with a heavy thud, sending a blow right to my soul. I hated leaving them behind more than anything.

  “I’d like to get the three girls tomorrow,” I said.

  “All three?”

  “Yes,” I replied. “Then, if all goes well, and I don’t see why it wouldn’t, I’d like to get a few more after that.”

  “If you’ve got the cash, why not?” He asked, shrugging nonchalantly, as if we were talking about selling something as simple as a car, not a life, a soul, a little girl.

  “Are any of those women their mothers?” I asked. “I don’t want any hassle.”

  “Won’t be any,” he said. “Those girls cry all the time. You sure that’s who you want? The women will be glad to get rid of them, I imagine.”

  “I’m sure,” I said. “I can make them look older, clean them up. A little lipstick and lingerie goes a long way.” I cringed at my words, but I needed to keep up the act.

  “Sure does, doesn’t it?”

  I laughed and nodded. We walked back into the clubhouse and Sophia met us at the door.

  “Hello, Grace, nice to see you again,” she said.

  “You too,” I said. “This is Eli.”

  “Hello, ma’am,” Eli said, nodding respectively.

  “Ma’am?” she laughed. “Call me Sophia, please.”

  “Sophia.” He nodded, his expression serious. I couldn’t tell if he was trying to remain professional or if he hadn’t recovered from the nightmare he’d just witnessed. Whatever it was, he was doing a good job. Sophia’s eyes lingered on him just a second longer than necessary and Snake noticed. Eli’s a good looking guy and I was happy to see he glanced away quickly. The last thing we needed was to provoke Snake’s jealousy in any way.

  “Nice to meet you, Eli,” she said. “So, did you two finish up your business?”

  “We did for now,” I replied. “I’ll be back tomorrow to get the girls.”

  “The girls?” Sophia asked.

  “Grace is taking the three youngest,” Snake said.

  “Right, you’re a broker,” she said, looking me up and down. I saw a flicker of disgust in her sharp, blue eyes. “From California, you said?”

  “Originally from New York, but I’m setting up shop in L.A. soon.”

  “Well, they’re sweet girls. They cry a lot, but they usually cry themselves to sleep pretty early.”

  I nodded, keeping silent. I wasn’t sure how to read Sophia. She was clearly a strong willed woman. She had to be if Snake was her man. But there was something about her — something I couldn’t put my finger on. Her eyes were hard, like she was hiding something behind her happy smile.

  “Babe, it’s late,” she said, turning to Snake. “I’m going to turn in for the night. Join me soon?”

  “I’ll be right there,” he said. “Just going to walk Grace and Eli out.”

  She smiled at me, then turned and glanced at Eli again, before walking away. We walked out to the car, parked just outside the front gate. I turned back to Snake and held out my hand.

  “What time should I be here tomorrow?”

  “You bringing cash? Small bills.”

  “Will do.”

  “Same time as tonight,” he said. “I’ll have the girls ready.”

  I cringed thinking that the girls had to spend even one more night in this hell-hole. I prayed it went easy and fast.

  “See you tomorrow, then!” I said, sliding into the car beside Eli.

  We pulled away from the curb and I broke down in tears.

  CHAPTER 13

  SOPHIA

  “I don’t know, babe,” I murmured over my shoulder, “I don’t know if I trust them.”

  Snake stood behind me as I sat on the corner of our bed. His arms wrapped around me as he leaned down, brushing a kiss across my ear.

  “Don’t worry, Soph,” he whispered, “they’re fine.”

  “Well, I do worry,” I said, pulling away. I stood up and turned to face him. “There’s something off about them and I don’t know what. First she shows up with one dude and the next day, she’s with someone else? Doesn’t that seem fishy to you?”

  “Not particularly, no,” he shook his head. He pulled me into his arms, pressing his chest against mine. He was warm. He felt good. I wanted to melt into him, kiss him, fall into the bed together and make love until we could forget this awful reality we were living.

  But that would never happen. Because he was the nightmare himself.

  Other than hugging me and giving me an occasional perfunctory kiss and slap on the ass when other’s were watching, the intimacy in our relationship had died long ago. About the time all the other women showed up, unfortunately.

  Snake hadn’t always been such a snake.

  When I’d first met him, he was a good guy. I guess that’s the way it always goes, isn’t it? They don’t show their ass until you’re in too deep to get away. At least, that’s how it was with us.

  Snake was dangerous, I knew that right away. He wore that cut like a second skin, like he was born in it. His loyalty was to the club, first and always. I knew that, too. I didn’t mind being second.

  But damn it, if he hadn’t swept this country girl off her feet like a sudden gust of wind. I felt stupid when I thought about it now, how easily he’d manipulated me, how he’d lifted me up at first, only to eventually place me firmly under his thumb. I had the illusion of freedom now, but he and I both knew it wasn’t real. He liked to teasingly call me his ‘ball and chain’, but he never let me forget who held the key.

  I thought I could handle it, at first.

  I thought I could change him.

  Go ahead, laugh. I get it.

  I’m older now, and I’ve been through hell and back with him. I should have left long ago. I tried, Lord knows I tried. And I’ll try again. I’ll keep fucking trying till I get it right, I guess.

  Until then, I play the part that Snake requires. I don’t get too sassy. I don’t talk back. I stay out of his business, as much as I can.

  But when it comes to staying out of jail, I feel like I should at least have some input. That’s why I told him how I felt about Grace. Something wasn’t right there. Of course, he didn’t believe me, because he was a fucking hard-headed prick, to put it bluntly.

  And even if it turns out I’m right, he’ll say he knew it all along and pretend I never uttered a word of warning to him.

  “I’d like to stay out of jail, Snake,” I tried again. “How do you know they aren’t cops?”

  “Because I asked.”

  “Seriously? They could have easily lied.”

  “Soph, shut the fuck up, okay?” He asked, his patience growing thin. He reached out, cupping my chin and staring deeply into my eyes. A year or so ago that might have worked, but now his magic had worn off. The spell was broken. He just didn’t realize it yet. It was safer for me that way.

  I nodded and he smiled, a crooked half-grin that crinkled the skin around his eyes. He was as handsome as ever. He’d gotten even better-looking as he’d aged, the asshole. It wasn’t fair. Unfortunately, his insides had only grown uglier, greedier, heartless — and now there was nothing good left inside of Snake.

  He wasn’t the man I’d fallen in love with anymore. And with the old Snake, my love and devotion for him had disappeared as well.

  “Besides, I know you’re just jealous of Grace.”

  “Jealous?” I asked. “Of her? Why would I be jealous of her?”

  “Well, you’re getting older, I get it. She’s really pretty.”

  “You’re not getting any younger yourself, babe,” I snapped.

  “Is that so?” He laughed. “I suppose not. I don’t hear anyone else complaining, though.”

  There it was. His subtle dig that he was fucking around. He’d never admit it outright, and I’d yet to catch him in the act, but I was pretty sure that was the reason he wasn’t fucking me anymore. Hell, the other guys practically admitted it to me by blocking my way to the
back room somedays. Like I didn’t know what Snake was doing back there.

  Shit.

  Like I cared…

  Once I realized he planned to start trafficking girls, I was furious. I raised hell for weeks. I took beating after beating for protesting, until I grew tired of it.

  A month into it, after I saw the grim reality, I made an anonymous call to the cops.

  I was sure they’d bust in with guns blazing and free the girls and take everyone to prison. After I made the call, I hid out at Mom’s for a while, watching the news, waiting to hear what happened. Two days later, nothing had happened at all. Snake summoned me back and when I returned to the compound, suddenly we had all this new business and Snake was bragging about how he’d paid off half the precinct in exchange for free service from the girls.

  The ‘cops’ never came.

  There were no arrests.

  There was no freedom.

  And although I was allowed outside the fences and gates and barbed wire, I knew not to stray too far. Snake kept me on a short leash. If I was gone too long, either he sent someone to come looking for me, or he came looking for me himself. Those times he came personally were always the most violent.

  After a while, I knew not to be gone too long.

  Things are just easier when I follow the rules.

  I know, I sound weak. But I’m not. I swear.

  Snake thinks I’m weak, too.

  Those girls he locks away probably think I’m weak, as well, because I don’t do anything to save them.

  But I’m going to show everybody someday.

  “Never mind,” I replied, refusing to allow him to rile me up tonight. I was tired.

  “That’s my girl,” he said. “How’s your mother?”

  “She’s fine,” I said. In fact, she wasn’t fine. She was worried about me. I’d told her everything and she wanted me to get away from Snake. She’d offered money and everything, but I knew what would happen if I left Snake. He’d hunt down me and everyone I loved, which only consisted of Mom and my sister Mona in Bend, and he’d kill us. The only way I could get out of all of this is if Snake dies or goes to prison.