The Line Between

by Tamsyn Bester

  She winked, and I knew she was kidding.

  Before Reid disappeared down the hall, he yelled back, “Jade, you know I want more than just your sugar, sugar!”

  My eyes widened, and I looked at Jade. She was biting her lip, and staring at the door where Reid had just left. Why she wouldn’t just step over that imaginary line and give into him was beyond me.

  I cleared my throat, bringing her attention to me. “You care to explain what that was about?”

  “It was Reid being Reid.” She waved me off and walked back towards her bedroom, but not before I caught the wistful smile on her face. I had the feeling something happened between them during the summer, but I didn’t want to pry. It wasn’t my business, and if Jade wanted me to know, then she would tell me.

  I wanted to follow Jade back to her room, but a voice from behind slowed my steps. I turned and found a tall brunette standing in our doorway.

  “Can I help you?” I asked, wishing we’d shut the door when Reid and Dane had left. Having people just walk in was getting old.

  “Hi, yes, this is room four-sixteen right?”

  I nodded. “It is.”

  “Great.” The girl walked in, dragging her suitcase with her. “I’m Ashley, your roommate.”

  Roommate? I didn’t remember anything about Jade and I having a roommate this year. It was definitely not part of the plan.

  “Are you sure?” I asked. “No one told us you were coming.”

  “Oh, that’s probably my fault. I enrolled late, and this was the only apartment that had an open room.”

  “Who’s that, Kennedy?” Jade bellowed from her room.

  “Our new roommate,” I replied, eyeing the girl. She was gorgeous. Like runways of Paris gorgeous. Her brown hair hung just below her shoulders, and made her natural caramel skin tone look darker. Her eyes were green, her nose straight, and her mouth pouty. She was tall, almost towering over me at five-nine. She looked like an Amazonian Goddess, except her boobs were fake. That much was obvious.

  Jade interrupted my not-so-subtle perusal when she appeared next to me. “We have a roommate?”

  “Looks like it,” I replied.

  Jade stuck out her hand, and Ashley took it, albeit reluctantly. I couldn’t blame her. If anyone was difficult to live with it was Jade.

  “You’re not on drugs, are you?” Asked Jade.

  Surprise flickered across Ashley’s face. Here we go.

  “No,” she replied. “My agent would kill me.”

  Ah. So she is a model.

  “Do you have a boyfriend?”

  Ashley chuckled. “No.”

  “Do you have an issue with burgers or pizza? Because I don’t think I can live with someone who only lives on rabbit food.”

  I laughed. Jade was being ridiculous, but I was enjoying it far too much to stop her little game.

  “We have a ‘no sex’ rule. Are you good with that?”

  Okay, that’s new. I waited to see where Jade was going with this inquisition. I thought she might have been joking, but her face was impassive. Shit, she’s not kidding. Not that it was an issue for me. I had no intention of being involved with anyone in that way, at least not for my first year.

  “I guess so,” replied Ashley. She didn’t seem bothered by it either. She just looked amused.

  Jade looked at me, and then back at Ashley. “Meh, I guess you can stay. You room is the one on the left. I’ll draw up some chore charts, so we all keep this place in tip-top shape.”

  “Sounds good,” said Ashley. She walked into her bedroom, and as soon as she was out of earshot, I scurried to Jade’s room.

  It looked exactly like mine, except her walls were now covered in beautiful sketches of clothes, and fabric swatches. Her bed had a funky lime green and blue cover on it, along with a few teddies she’d always hung on to. She’d already hung up a few pictures, and unpacked her clothes, which was more than I’d done. For some reason I was stalling.

  “Did you know we were getting a roommate?” I asked, taking a seat on Jade’s bed. She spun around in her desk chair.

  “No. I specifically said I needed the third room for my makeshift studio. But, we’ll see how it goes. If we find that it doesn’t work for us, we’ll find a way to fix it.”

  With a nod, I started fiddling with the quilt that Jade’s grandmother had made her when she was younger. It had different colored squares all patched up together, and I thought it was quite metaphoric. None of the colors fit together, and yet it still works. Kind of like how life was. Or more specifically my life.

  “Are you worried about the whole Dane situation?” Asked Jade.

  “Not worried, just annoyed. This was supposed to be my fresh start, you know? I knew I’d have to see him eventually, but maybe from a distance. Not because he’s our neighbor.”

  Jade went quiet, and I could almost hear the wheels turning in her head. I envied the way she was able to let almost anything roll off her back, instead of analyzing and dissecting it the way I did.

  “You know what I think?” She said, breaking the silence. “I think you should shove all thoughts about him out of your mind, and focus on living a little. You know he’ll do and say anything to get a reaction out of you, and quite honestly, I think that boy has some major feelings for you.”

  My head shot up, and I grimaced. “You can’t be serious?”

  Her eyebrows arched at my response. I sounded defensive, even to my own ears. “As a heart attack. When the two of you face off the way you did earlier, the sexual tension is enough to make my lady bits tingle.”

  “Oh my God,” I laughed. “You did not just mention your lady parts with me and Dane in the same sentence. That’s wrong on so many levels.”

  Jade rolled her eyes. “Oh please, don’t act all innocent now. You just hate him too much right now to see what I see. I have no doubt he wants to bump uglies with you.”

  “Jade!” I chided.

  “What? Was that too graphic for you? Would you prefer if I said he wants to ‘tend to your lady garden’? Or maybe he wants to ‘impale you with his iron rod’?”

  I stared at Jade as if she’d lost her mind, and then we both burst into hysterics. I laughed until tears streaked down my face, and held my stomach.

  “You read too many romance novels,” I said, wiping my cheeks.

  “There’s no such thing,” replied Jade. She tried to look offended, but in the end our laughter had taken over.

  “Speaking of sexual tension, you care to explain what’s going on between you and Reid?” I asked.

  Jade looked down at her lap, and avoided my gaze. “Nothing.” She let out a heavy breath and then lifted her head. “He’s been my best friend since I was practically in diapers. I’m pretty sure our moms have planned our wedding already.”

  Her expression was somewhat unreadable, but I knew how she felt about Reid. I also knew she was scared, and for that I blamed Reid’s inability to keep his dick in his pants long enough to be in a relationship. He was a great guy, but he was still a guy. Football, and regular dick-dipping were the only two things that seemed to register.

  “It’s time to take your own advice, Jade, and live a little. Reid will come to his senses, you’ll see.”

  Jade sighed. “Okay, enough about the two idiots next door. How about we finish unpacking the kitchen, and then grab dinner with our new roomie? I’m dying for Mexican food.”

  “That’s actually a good idea. I’ve been itching to take a walk around campus since we arrived.”

  I jumped off Jade’s bed, and turned my head before I left her room. “Just stay away from the fucking tequila. I’m not carrying you home.”

  Jade’s response was to throw a pillow at my head, which narrowly missed my head when I ducked. We both chuckled, remembering how hung over she was this morning, and then I dove right back into the boxes in the kitchen.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Kennedy

  I WAS VAGUELY aware of movement in my bedroom. I snuggled deepe
r into my bed, burrowing beneath the comforter. My alarm was scheduled to go off soon though, my body already stirring in expectation. My body always started waking up before it could start screaming, and I hated it.

  I heard a muffled ‘sshhh’, and seconds later two bodies jumped onto my bed, jostling me.

  “Happy Birthday!” Jade and Ashley screamed in unison. They continued to jump until I had no choice but to make an appearance.

  “Stop,” I groaned. “It’s too early.”

  They dropped next to me, and pulled the covers from my face. I opened one eye, and found both girls grinning at me.

  So it was my 19th birthday. I wanted to be excited, and maybe a small part of me was. But it wasn’t enough to eclipse the lack of enthusiasm I had for this day. My 17th birthday was the last one I’d ever celebrated, and I’d hoped I could get through this day without fuss. Clearly that wasn’t an option, not with Jade and Ashley for roommates.

  When I glanced at my alarm clock on the side of my bed, it read 6:55am, and I groaned again. “You couldn’t wait five minutes?”

  “Shut up, grumpy pants, and get up already,” said Jade. “Ash and I have a surprise for you.”

  I stared at the eagerness on my friends’ faces, and felt my resolve crumbling, if only slightly. With a huff, I shoved my comforter off and sat up, rubbing the tiredness from my eyes.

  Ashley snickered. “You look terrible at this time of the morning.”

  Her tone was light, and teasing, and I wanted to capture the essence of it in the hopes that it would make today easier to get through.

  “We can’t all look like we’re ready to do a Vogue cover shoot at,” I looked at my alarm again, “7:00am.”

  “This is definitely a good look for you,” she replied, laughter lighting up her eyes. Of course she looked ready for a photo shoot, even in her tiny cotton sleep shorts and matching blue tank top.

  I rolled my eyes. We’d found out that Ashley was in fact a model, and she’d been on the runways from the tender age of sixteen until she’d decided she wanted to study biochemistry. She was a triple threat – gorgeous, smart, and kind – and it turned out she was the third part of our ‘trio’ we never knew was missing. We’d been at college for almost a month, but it only took days for the three of us to bond, and become tethered to one another.

  “Enough blabbing,” said Jade. She slid off my bed, and picked up a large purple box from the floor before crawling back to my side. “This is for you, from me and Ash.”

  “You didn’t have to do that,” I said. I hated this kind of attention, and there was only one person who had ever made me feel worthy of it. But he was gone, and his absence was what made me dread this day. Guilt wrapped around my heart, coiling tightly until it was ready to burst. I should be able to enjoy this day, but how can I when the person who meant the most to me in the world would never have a birthday again?

  Something in my expression must’ve given my inner turmoil away because Jade nudged my arm, concern etching its way across her features. “Are you okay? It looked like you were somewhere else.”

  I’d been staring at the lid of the box, my mind flicking through all the birthdays I’d managed to enjoy until I turned seventeen.

  “Yeah,” I replied, trying for a smile. “I was just thinking of something.”

  Understanding took the place of concern on Jade’s face, and the look of pity in her eyes is what made me almost crack. Almost.

  I plastered on a grin, and flipped the lid of the box before she could read me any longer. Beneath a layer of light purple tissue paper, I found several paperbacks, all from my favorite authors. I had a predilection for indie authors, and Jade and Ashley had been sure to include some of the books I’d been dying to purchase online. I touched the covers, feeling slightly overwhelmed by the thoughtfulness of the gift itself. I’d never needed expensive gifts. I’d always favored gifts that required thought, and intention.

  “I love them,” I said, counting a total of eight books. I looked up to Jade and Ashley’s happy faces.

  “There’s more,” replied Ashley. Her body hummed with excitement, and anticipation, which only piqued my curiosity. Jade smirked, and they traded a knowing glance.

  What are they up to?

  I lifted another piece of tissue paper, this one a darker shade of purple, and almost died when I saw what was lying beneath it. My cheeks warmed, and I stifled what I knew would be a frightening combination of a laugh, and a choke.

  “What the hell, Jade?” I squeaked. My face was probably the shade of an over-ripe tomato. She laughed, which in turn caused Ashley to do the same. At least they enjoyed my mortification. Me on the other hand? Not so much.

  “Well don’t just stare at it,” said Jade. “Pick it up.”

  I looked back at the offending object, and then gingerly picked it up. The plastic packaging was hard beneath my hand, and my eyes immediately went to the label.

  Ovo K2 Blackberry Rabbit Vibe

  “It’s a vibrator,” said Ashley. How could she be so nonchalant about a plastic penis that vibrated?

  “I can see that,” I replied, still a little stunned. “Care to explain the brilliance behind this idea?”

  I directed my gaze at Jade. “What? Why would you think it was my idea and not Ashley’s?”

  “Because you’re the horniest person in this apartment, and the only one brave enough to think of giving me a gift like this. It’s got your name written all over it,” I replied.

  “Okay fine.” Jade sighed. “You caught me. I figured you could have some fun on your own.” She winked, and my blush darkened. I wasn’t a prude, but I wasn’t exactly experienced either.

  “You’re crazy,” I replied, looking between Jade and Ashley. “Both of you.”

  “There’s one more thing in there,” Ashley added.

  More? Good Lord, what else could they have gotten me?

  That’s when I saw it. A pale blue lace demi bra with beautifully scalloped edging around the top and bottom, the straps, and bows made of silk and satin. The matching thong was made from sheer mesh, with a skirt of scalloped lace and a bow at the center front.

  “It’s one of the new sets from Agent Provocateur,” said Ashley. “I had my agent call in a favor, and get it for you before it hit the stores.”

  Sure, it was underwear, fucking gorgeous underwear, but the amount of effort Ashley must have gone through to get it for me made me that much more appreciative.

  I placed all the items back in the box, and put it aside before enveloping Jade and Ashley in a hug.

  “Thank you,” I said, swallowing the sudden rise of emotion in my throat. “I love my gifts.”

  “It’s just the start,” replied Jade. “We have a whole lot more fun planned for you.” The glint in Jade’s eyes told me she wasn’t kidding, and I’d started to feel a little more excited about the day ahead.

  “First things first,” Ashley clapped her hands together. “We made you a horrendously sweet, and fattening breakfast.”

  As if on cue, my stomach grumbled, and we all meandered out into the kitchen where stacks of waffles had been placed on the counter, accompanied by my favorite Ben & Jerry’s ice-cream. Peanut Butter Fudge. If the gifts hadn’t been able to lift my spirits, then all the sugary goodness in front of me definitely had.

  We sat at our kitchen counter, stuffing our faces with more sugar than should have been allowed. It was nice to catch up, since our hectic schedules didn’t always allow us to spend time together. We laughed over and over again, and I allowed myself to enjoy it.

  It’s what my brother would have wanted.

  ** ** **

  THE APARTMENT WAS quiet when I walked in. I dumped my messenger bag by the door, and stopped short when I saw an elaborate bouquet of flowers on the kitchen counter.

  I took the card out, and immediately grimaced.

  Happy Birthday, Kennedy.

  Love,

  Dad & Shelly

  Admittedly I was a little surprised.
Getting flowers from my father was more than I expected, and I was certain that it was either Lucy or my father’s personal assistant who had sent them. I knew my father remembered my birthday, but it certainly wasn’t in a celebratory way. He remembered it as the day my mother died. Or in his words ‘the day I killed my mother’. He’d made a point of avoiding me from the time the nurses wrapped me in a tiny pink blanket to now, and had managed to make me feel more like an onus than a blessing. For the most part I never felt unloved, thanks to Lucy, and my older brother, Charlie. But I’d hidden the small part of me that had always wanted my father to not only love me, but want me too. After a while I’d stopped hoping, and when he remarried I became invisible to him.

  The front door opened, and my sullen mood lifted when Jade and Ashley walked in.

  “Hey birthday girl,” Jade greeted. “How has your day been?”

  “Pretty good, actually.”

  It was the truth. Despite being worried that the day would suck, it turned out to be the opposite. I’d spoken to my grandparents, and filled them in on college life while trying not to cry because I missed them so much. Then I’d spoken to Lucy, promising to pay her a visit soon.

  “These are gorgeous,” said Ashley. She closed her eyes and took a whiff of the flowers. “Who are they from?”

  “My father,” I replied.

  Jade’s eyes bugged out of her head. “Are you fucking kidding me? After nineteen years, he decides to acknowledge you now?”

  Her tone was suddenly angry, but I couldn’t bring myself to share her feelings. I was used to being nonexistent to my father, and I had no room in my heart for anger when it wouldn’t change anything. I had one man in my life that had raised me, and he turned out to be enough. I’d done just fine without my father, and that wasn’t about to change.

  “Oh, and Shelly,” I added. My stepmother was half my father’s age, and the very definition of a trophy wife, fake boobs included. Our interactions had been minimal while I was growing up, and I’d aimed to keep it that way.

  “Seriously? I bet your dad’s assistant sent them,” said Jade, voicing my initial thought on the subject.