Solace (Asteria Trilogy Book 1)

by Alaina Katherine

  Throughout the day, I did feel slightly better. The darkness still appeared of course, but it was manageable. Its smoke wasn’t as thick and black anymore, it had turned into a lucid grey. Maybe with a little more time, and hopefully less people dying, I could begin to feel like myself again. The problem was, I didn’t know how to prevent all the deaths.

  Chapter Sixteen

  An address flashed through my head, it was unfamiliar and I was unsure of where it came from. The voice that said it was faintly familiar. I opened my eyes. Wherever I was it was dark and the silhouettes of the objects were unfamiliar. I was sitting on the floor of the room; I felt rope digging into my wrists and ankles.

  “Sage?” a male voice questioned.

  “Brian?” I heard myself answer.

  “Sage, it’s a trap! Do not come for me!” There was panic behind his words.

  “I have to save you, you can’t just expect me to let you die.”

  “If you come for me you, and whoever you bring with you, will die. That’s their plan. The Anakim want to lure the angels here. They want to ambush them. You need to promise me that you won’t come here!”

  “I can’t promise that. I have to protect you,” I demanded.

  “No, you need to protect the human race, not just me. If you come here, you can’t do that. They will win. Don’t give them what they want. You know what the right thing to do is. Please Sage, let me do this. Let me die.”

  I sat up in my own bed and wiped away the tears that had fallen in my sleep. I wasn’t surprised when I saw Gabriel walk into my bedroom.

  “I spoke to him, while I was sleeping. How is that even possible?” I asked once I had finished explaining the conversation to Gabriel. “I was in his head, and he knew I was there.”

  “You’re the Goddess; you shouldn’t be surprised that you have abilities that we don’t even know of.” Gabriel and I were sitting on the edge of my bed, the side of my bare leg pressed lightly against his clothed one. I noticed Gabriel made quite an effort to not look down at the shorts I was wearing.

  Gabriel had gotten even more cautious around me now that Michael and I had made our relationship official. Gabriel was always a gentleman of course, but there was a time his gaze might have drifted for just a second. I suppose most girls would go to their boyfriend when something upsetting happens. I felt ashamed that I didn’t ever go to Michael first with my problems, I know it upsets him. It’s not something that can be helped though. Besides the fact that it’s Gabriel’s job and that he has a special sense when it came to me, it was always Gabriel whom I told things to, who’s seen me in all my weakest and worst states.

  “I know where he is now. We can get him.” I looked up eagerly at Gabriel. It was the first time I had felt hope in a long time.

  “He told you it was a trap, Sage. You know we can’t go.” His voice held pity.

  “There has to be some way,” I pleaded.

  “I know this is probably the hardest thing you’ve had to do, but you need to let this go. Even if you can’t understand the logic in it, you should do it because it is what Brian asked of you. You can’t share that address with anyone, especially not Michael.”

  I knew he was right of course. I allowed my tears to fall freely in streams down my face and Gabriel held me as I cried. Once again I was staying on the sidelines while someone died. If Gabriel hadn’t been there I’m sure the darkness would have swallowed me whole. How was I going to keep this from Michael? Brian’s death would hurt him the most.

  So many people were suffering and dying. Things had better start heading in a different direction, and soon.

  We eventually moved into a lying position, with me still crying softly and Gabriel holding me and stroking my hair. My eyes were swollen and burning, and as I closed them to drift off to sleep I heard Gabriel whisper into the top of my head. “I’m so sorry, meum delicium.”

  When I awoke the following morning I heard the faint sound of a knife chopping away in my kitchen. With a groan I rolled out of bed and shuffled into my bathroom. I let out another groan when I got a look at myself in the mirror. It was obvious that I had cried myself to sleep last night; I had huge dark, puffy circles under my eyes and the whites of my eyes held a slight pink hue. Worst of all, they still burned a bit and felt heavy lidded.

  After splashing my face with cold water, I joined Gabriel in my kitchen.

  “Perfect timing.” Though I could not see his face, his tone revealed that he was smiling. When he turned around he handed me a bowl of colorful fruits.

  “Thank you.” My voice was muffled by the blueberry I had just popped into my mouth.

  “I have somewhere I want to take you today.”

  “As long as it doesn’t involve socializing, I’m in.”

  “Great.” He beamed. “You can even bring Storm along.” Her ears peaked up at the mention of her name.

  Once I had finished the fruit, I showered and got myself ready for the day. The shower did a great job of helping me feel more awake and I probably stayed under the hot water for longer than I should and I’m sure Gabriel was growing impatient with me. Since I had already made him wait so long I didn’t bother drying my hair, instead I twisted it into a bun and headed towards the front door.

  “Ready!” I called out. I whistled and patted my leg as a signal for Storm to come along with us and she eagerly bounded out of her bed, tongue hanging out and all. We headed into a direction I had never been to before because it lead to a dense mass of trees.

  “I thought there wasn’t anything but forest over here?” I asked once we got closer to the lining of the trees.

  “There’s not too much but there is something pretty amazing. You’ll see when we get there.”

  We entered onto a small path through the trees, Storm was having the time of her life sticking her nose into every leaf and chasing small bugs. After about fifteen minutes of walking, the trees started to thin out and were spread apart. We seemed to be approaching a small, black, wrought iron gate that was only waist high.

  Beyond the gate was a garden, a narrow stone path winding its way throughout. The trees were still plenty enough to provide more shade than sun and the sun only broke through in small patches. There were bushes of all sizes lining the pathway, some filled with colorful flowers and others filled with juicy berries. Some of the trees also had vines of flowers snaking their way around them and hanging from their branches, the blooms falling just over our heads.

  Gabriel picked what looked like a raspberry off of a bush and handed it to me. I cautiously placed it in my mouth and when I pressed the berry to the roof of my mouth a river of juice flowed from it. I was right, definitely raspberry.

  “Is this where you get all your fruit from?” I questioned.

  “Some of it, I also go to Risnuch’s farm. Uriel comes here for the flowers he uses in his paints and the ingredients for his teas.”

  “I don’t know how you kept this place from me for so long. You had to know I would love it here.”

  “Well, I didn’t want to run out of amazing places to show you so I had to keep some secret. Azrael didn’t help by showing you the lake.”

  “So there are more?” I raised an eyebrow. Gabriel shrugged his shoulders refusing to say more.

  We wandered around the garden in silence for a while before there was a question nagging away at my mind. I hesitated to ask it though because I didn’t want Gabriel to get upset with me.

  “Can I ask you a question?”

  “Anything.”

  “Your parents died in the last battle against the Anakim didn’t they?” I looked at my feet.

  Gabriel stopped walking before answering, “Yes, they did.”

  “What happened in that fight?”

  “There was one fallen angel who decided to bring the Anakim race back, the other fallen were against the idea, but by the time they found out what he was doing, he had already built up a strong army. For the first time, the angels and the fallen worked together to wip
e out the Anakim and that rogue fallen angel. I was too young to fight in the battle so I had to stay up here with the other kids, but both my parents went to fight. Though we ultimately won, a number of angels died in the process and my parents were among those.”

  “Do you ever hate Asteria for their death? Or blame her?”

  “No, never. And don’t think I would hate you either.” His voice was soft yet insistent.

  “Was Asteria around for that battle?”

  Gabriel shook his head. “That’s how Michael and I got so close. We had always been friends, but once my parents died he took me into his family. He was there for me when I wasn’t even there for myself.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Though I didn’t blame Asteria for their death, I did blame myself. I thought that maybe, if I had pleaded with them to stay with me instead of fighting, I could have saved their lives. But I just let them go off to war; I hated myself for not even trying. I know that’s ridiculous now of course, and now more than ever I understand why they fought. They died in the way all angels wish to go, Sage, so please don’t think I have any ill will towards the Goddess.”

  I nodded my head slowly. With my gaze still fixed on my feet, I had a feeling I knew what was coming next.

  “You understand that I will fight when the time comes, right Sage? We know that a battle against the Anakim must happen soon. I have discussed it with Uriel. You will stay up here with him. Michael will fight also; you should know that as well.”

  His words sliced through me. The angels had discussed this already, planned it out behind my back.

  “I need you to understand that we must fight for our Goddess. That I must fight for you.” He tilted my chin up, forcing me to look at him.

  “While I am forced to stay up here? What about all the training I’ve been through? I can fight too.” I demanded.

  “No, my job is still to keep you safe. There is no reason for you to join us in this, so you will not. The sessions have been to ensure that you would know what to do just in case you were faced with danger, but you will not fight with us. At least not this time.”

  I tore my face from his grasp and turned my back to him.

  “What happens if you get hurt, or worse,” my voice cracked.

  Gabriel gently turned me to face him again.

  “Then you must know that I died in the noblest way. I would gladly die for you.”

  My eyes watered at his words and I blinked back my tears. If this was how I reacted at just the thought of losing him I would hate to see what I would do if he actually was gone.

  “Of course, I will fight my hardest to come back to you,” he whispered as he wiped away the single tear that had managed to escape. He also took my now dry hair out of its bun and it fell in waves around my shoulders. “I like you hair like this.” He wrapped a curl around his index finger.

  I heard someone clear their throat before saying, “Gabriel, may I speak with you alone please.”

  We both turned to see Metatron standing just a few feet way. Gabriel seemed to whiten a bit as he dropped his hand and took a step away from me.

  “Of course.” His voice was tight. “Sage, wait here for me,” he added before walking off with Metatron.

  “I worry that you have developed feelings for her,” I faintly heard Metatron comment before they were completely out of earshot.

  I sunk down onto a nearby stone bench while I waited for them to return while Storm continued to snuffle around. I hadn’t been able to hear Gabriel’s response to Metatron’s comment and I was going to be sure to ask about the conversation they were having. It would not be the most comfortable conversation but, that is the third time now that someone has commented on Gabriel’s attitude towards me.

  I waited for a good fifteen minutes before hearing footsteps approaching. Gabriel had come back alone. He sat down next to me on the bench and opened his mouth to say something but I cut him off.

  “What was that about?”

  “Metatron was just checking in on some matters.” Way to be vague.

  “I heard the first thing he said Gabriel, and it’s not the first time someone’s made a comment like that. Azrael called you jealous when you threw Michael into my window and I know Michael has similar thoughts on the matter.” For a moment Gabriel looked down as his hands, fiddling with a leaf.

  “I think it’s hard for everyone else to understand the connection I have with you, it’s very different from the normal connection an angel shares with a charge. They are just misinterpreting it.” His voice was distant as he said the words.

  “So there’s no jealousy.” I reflected back to how many nights we shared together, and how a lot of those nights were now shared in my bed. I thought about how gentle his touch could be and the effect it sometimes had on me. The concern in his eyes when he looked at me was something I had never seen in anyone else’s gaze.

  “Just like I assured Metatron, my feelings for you are strictly platonic.” Though I knew they shouldn’t, his words penetrated my heart. I had to swallow a lump in my throat before I spoke.

  “Well, that’s good then,” was my pathetic reply. We sat in silence for a few minutes before Gabriel spoke again.

  “You know, we need to tell Michael about Brian.”

  “I guess we can do that now. Together?” I stood up.

  “Together.” He gave a halfhearted smile.

  I wasn’t looking forward to telling Michael about my conversation with Brian. It was probably going to hurt him worse than it had hurt me. We dropped Storm off at my house before heading to Michael’s and Gabriel’s. When we got there, Azrael and Sera were there as well. Gabriel and I walked into the room and Michael’s face lit up as he got up from his chair and walked up to me, planting a firm kiss on my mouth with one arm warped around my waist pressing me to him.

  “Get a room,” Azrael snuffed before throwing a pillow at us.

  “Gladly,” Michael purred.

  I looked sheepish as we broke apart, I always wasn’t big on PDA but this was especially bad with Gabriel and Sera in the room. Lately, I had always felt cautious around Sera because, I knew of her feelings towards Michael but, she was her usual sweet self around me.

  Michael’s greeting had made telling him the bad news even harder and I threw a glance at Gabriel hoping he would understand my meaning: how are we supposed to do this?

  “Michael, we have something we need to tell you,” Gabriel started. Michael dropped his hand from my waist and looked suspiciously back and forth between me and Gabriel.

  “It’s about Brian,” I rushed to add, not wanting Michael to get the wrong idea, knowing how sensitive he was about the closeness I shared with Gabriel. “I think you should sit.”

  We arranged ourselves so that Michael was sitting on the couch between me and Gabriel. Sera and Azrael sat in chairs facing us.

  “So, I spoke to Brian last night in a dream. I know where he is.”

  “Then we must go get him,” he stated plainly.

  “We can’t,” Gabriel replied. “He does not wish to be saved.” He went on to explain what Brian had told me about the Anakims’ plan to trap us. I swear I saw at least fifty different expressions cross Michael’s face throughout the conversation.

  “He is noble,” was the first thing out of Michael’s mouth. “Though it is difficult, I understand his choice.”

  “I’m sorry,” my voice was small. Michael turned to me and grabbed my shoulders.

  “You cannot let me know where he is or I will surely go to him. No matter how hard I try to get that information from you, you must not give it to me. Promise me.”

  “I know Michael, I promise.” I had promised the same thing to Gabriel last night.

  “So why don’t we just set a trap for the Anakim?” Azrael asked, as if it were an obvious course of action.

  “How would we even do that?” I queried.

  A wicked smile appeared on Azrael’s face as she planned it out.

  “We
pick a time and place; they want a battle so of course they’ll concede. A small number of us will show up. A believable number, of course. This way we can lead them to believe that that is all of us, all there is to fight. This will get their hopes up and lower their guards, and then the rest will come down from Aether and join the fight. Surely that will give us the upper hand.” The gleam in her eyes revealed her excitement about the impending battle.

  “It might just work,” Michael mused.

  “But how will we get them the message?” I asked.

  “Through Brian,” I was surprised to hear Sera give the response. “Do you think you can connect with him again in a dream?”

  I thought for a moment, searching inside myself, hoping for a response from Asteria. Will she allow it? “Yes, I actually think I can,” I said sadly, knowing that once he relayed that message to the Anakim they would kill him. I never even got the chance to bring him to see Aether.

  As the angel’s began planning out all the details, I wandered off into the kitchen and sat at the bar top and watched them strategize from a distance. At some point Raphael had joined them. It was strange watching Sera give suggestions, hearing talk of violence coming from her lilting voice.

  During their session, Gabriel went to the kitchen to grab drinks for everyone and when he did so I grabbed his arm and pulled him close to me.

  “At least promise me you won’t be part of the group that goes first,” I pleaded.

  “Sage, I am one of the strongest warriors, logically I should be a part of the first group. I have the highest chance of surviving.”

  “Promise me,” I hissed.

  “Fine,” He sighed and I relaxed my shoulders a bit knowing he now had even a higher chance at surviving.

  “If you could get them all to go in the second group that would be great.” I nodded my head in the direction of the living room.

  “I can try, but I can’t make promises for them.”

  That night when I closed my eyes I thought of Brian, and how I was about to issue his death sentence.

  “Sage, thank you for not coming.” It was a strange thing to thank me for and under another circumstance it might sound insulting.