Mending Hearts

by Brenda Kennedy

  Everyone starts talking at once, and I raise my hand to quiet the room. I hear gasps and I see why. My hand looks worse than it is. As quickly and as calmly as I can, I try to explain what happened at the school and I also try to fill them in on Raelynn and James. Emma’s dad tells me there are two casualties at the school. The vice-principal also didn’t make it. This news makes the already somber room even more somber.

  I say, “I hate to hear that. This is truly a sad day in Manatee County. We’re leaving to take the kids home and may I suggest if you come over, to please call first. Raelynn will be medicated today and we’ll see how she is tomorrow. James is also ill with the flu and is contagious.” I look around the room at all the somber faces. “Thank you all for coming; it means a lot to all of us.”

  I walk back into the room where the kids are, and I realize that I don’t have a car. I hear a noise and see all the grandparents are walking in behind me. They linger in the hallway since the patient’s rooms are so small. “You’ll need a ride,” my dad says.

  “Are you guys ready to go home?” I ask Emma and Molly.

  I look at Molly, and Emma says, “Molly, do you want to come home with us? I’m sure you want to be with your daughter tonight.”

  “Yes, thank you. I would like to be close to Raelynn tonight. Are you sure it’s all right?”

  “Yes, I’m sure.”

  The grandparents all drive us home; I am not surprised that after today they want to be as close to Rae and James as they can be. As soon as we get home, we carry the kids upstairs. Each child gets a bath as their mothers help them. I lay out pajamas for Raelynn and James. Molly and Emma are both very quiet and I wonder if they are in shock.

  “I’m going to sleep with James,” Emma says.

  “Ok, do you need anything?”

  “No, thank you.”

  She begins to cry and I cup her face. “Baby, it’s all over. They’re safe.”

  “Your hand, what happened to your hand?”

  “It looks worse than what it is. Let’s get you to bed.”

  Emma lifts my hand and kisses it softly. “I’m sorry, I didn’t notice your hand. Are you all right?”

  “I am, Baby.” She cries and I wipe away her tears. I pull the covers back and she climbs in bed behind James. He lies on the edge with a bucket nearby. I hear Molly crying from the other room. I kiss Emma and go and check on Raelynn.

  I bend down and kiss Raelynn.

  Molly sniffles and I look over at her. “Alec, she is so lucky to have you.”

  “Thank you, I love her so much,” I say as I brush Raelynn’s long brown hair away from her face.

  “We made a beautiful daughter together, didn’t we?”

  I smile and say, “We sure did. There’ll never be anyone else like her.”

  “I’m sorry that I screwed everything up. I don’t know what happened to me. Look at what I almost threw away.” Molly cries and I’m speechless.

  “Molly, the most important thing is that now you’re getting better. You made a mistake and you learned from it.”

  “I’m trying, I really am. I have so much guilt. I don’t know how or why you and Emma can be so nice to me.”

  “Molly, do you need some water?” Bridget asks from the hallway.

  “No, mom, I’m fine.”

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t know Alec was in here.”

  “It’s fine, Bridget, I was just leaving. Good night, Rae,” I whisper as I kiss her again. “Good night, Molly.”

  I quickly shower and walk downstairs to find the grandparents are still here. The house smells of coffee and bacon. I love coffee and bacon. The grandpas are all sitting around drinking coffee and talking. I walk into the kitchen to get a cup of coffee and the grandmas, who know that people have to eat, are gathered around the island cutting lettuce, tomatoes, and frying up bacon. BLT’s, my favorite. If politicians ever made bacon illegal, I might try a BLT made with Beggin’ Strips. With all that has happened, you wouldn’t think that I would be thinking about jokes about BLT’s, but I am. I get a cup of coffee and Gene, Danny, Sam, my dad, and I all walk outside. Danny thanks me for what I did. With Max gone and James being his only grandchild, I know how frightened he must have been. To lose your only child and then to think you may have lost your only grandchild… I don’t want to think about it. They want to know what exactly happened today, so I go into grave details about the events of the day and what I heard when I walked near the cafeteria. I tell them I was there to pick up James since he was sick. My eyes tear up when I think about Raelynn hiding under the tables with the other scared children and how she wet herself from fear.

  After we eat and everything is cleaned up, the grandparents start leaving. The grandmas are all reluctant to leave as the grandpas gently persuade them to go. I have to smile at the thought of Raelynn and James having four sets of grandparents.

  “What are you smiling at?” Bridget asks.

  Everyone looks up and my smile gets even bigger. “Rae and James have four sets of grandparents. Do you know what a blessing this is for them?”

  I watch as four sets of couples look around the room at each other. Dad laughs and says, “Well, I guess they do.” Everyone leaves and I lock up the house. I don’t sleep upstairs, I sleep on the couch instead. I guess I feel like I can watch over my family better from here.

  The next morning, I wake James up from his sleep and medicate him with his antibiotic and Phenergan. Emma is in bed beside him, lying there awake.

  “Good morning.”

  She smiles at me and says, “Good morning.”

  “Do you want some coffee?”

  “No, I’m going to lie in bed with him for a while longer.”

  “Ok.” I lean in and kiss her. I go and check on Raelynn and Molly. They are also still asleep. I make coffee and sit on the couch. I don’t turn the TV on because I don’t want to see the news. My hand hurts more today than it did yesterday, so I take some Tylenol for the pain.

  While I’m having my second cup of coffee, Molly and Emma both walk down the stairs together.

  “The coffee smells too good, I tried to resist but I couldn’t,” Emma says.

  “I was going to stay in bed with Raelynn, but I don’t think she’ll be waking up anytime soon,” Molly says.

  “I think it’s a good idea to let her sleep as long as she can. Did she have any nightmares last night?”

  “No, she slept all night. That medicine must have knocked her out.”

  I follow Molly and Emma into the kitchen and watch as Emma hands Molly a coffee cup. We sit at the island together and talk about yesterday.

  “This is exactly why we wanted to homeschool Raelynn,” Molly says.

  “It is definitely the main reason. There are pros and cons to everything. It’s hard to know the right thing to do,” I say as I take a drink of my coffee.

  “Max died before we could even have this conversation. But after yesterday, I don’t feel comfortable sending the kids back to school.” Emma looks to Molly, then at me, and takes a deep breath. “What all do you have to do to homeschool your child?”

  “You have to have so many hours of class time a day and you and the kids whom you teach have to pass annual tests to make sure you are capable of teaching them and that the kids are learning as they should.” Molly looks at me and Emma and adds, “I researched it before my life took a nosedive to hell.”

  “I never even considered it… until now. This stuff happens a lot and you can’t prepare your kids because every case is different. Do you run or do you hide? How do you prepare small children for that?” Emma asks. “I don’t want to have to prepare them for this kind of stuff. We shouldn’t have to sit with our kids and tell them what to do if a gunman enters their school. They are only five and seven years old.”

  Emma cries and I hug her. “Emma, yesterday was an eye opener for all of us. I know this stuff happens, but I never thought it would happen here,” I say.

  Emma makes omelets and we talk about
other things while we eat. Molly tells us she is doing great since she got out of rehab and she regrets everything about the last year and a half of her life. She tells us she’ll never fall into that downhill spiral again. She says how much she loved getting the glittery cards from James and Raelynn while she was gone. She laughs and says that she still has glitter in her suitcase, dresser drawers, and in her makeup case.

  I say that, before yesterday, I didn’t realize how many grandparents James and Raelynn had. We all laugh and Emma said she and Molly already talked about this. “They are very blessed to have so many. It’s nice that Max’s parents have accepted Raelynn, and it’s nice that Molly’s parents have also accepted James.”

  Emma shares that this week she was reminded just how precious life is. She vows to be a better friend and to be there more for the people who need her and to be the best mom, girlfriend, and daughter that she can be. She shares about Angel and the twins and about how she feels she let life consume her and take her away from what is most important.

  The buzzer sounds, alerting us that someone is at the front gate. I answer it and buzz Bridget through. She is here to pick up Molly and take her home. I go upstairs to check on the kids as Emma and Molly wait on the front porch for Bridget.

  Emma

  Bridget pulls up with Alec’s mom in her car, and my mom and Max’s mom are in the car behind her. Another car pulls in and it’s Brooke. I look at Molly and then back at the cars. As they get out of their cars, I say, “Hi, we didn’t expect to see all you guys.”

  “We know, I hope it’s all right we all came. Maybe we should have called first, I’m sorry,” Bridget says, apologetically.

  “No, please, you don’t have to apologize. You guys are always welcome. The kids are still in bed.” I hold the door open for them to walk through.

  “Good, we’re here on business,” my mom says as she walks past me into the house.

  “What’s going on?” I ask Brooke.

  “I have no idea. Your mom called me here for a meeting.”

  Molly walks into the house before me and says, “Business? Now that sounds serious.”

  Alec walks down the stairs and smiles when he sees everyone. “Good morning,” he says.

  Molly, Brooke, and I remain standing, unsure of what we should do.

  “We would like to talk to you guys. The kids are still asleep?” Doris asks.

  “They are. Do you want to talk here or outside?” Alec asks.

  “We want to be able to hear the kids if they wake up, so here is good,” Cheryl says.

  “Please have a seat.” Alec motions with his hand for everyone to sit. Molly, Brooke, and I remain standing as we are clueless as to why the formality. “Molly, Brooke, and Emma, sit,” Alec says and we do. Alec sits on one of the stairs and Molly, Brooke, and I sit on the floor together.

  Once everyone is seated Bridget says, “We want you all to listen to us before you say anything. Is that clear?”

  “Yes, of course,” Alec says.

  Bridget looks over at me, Brooke, and Molly. “Girls?”

  “Not even a peep,” Molly says.

  “Have you seen the news yet this morning?” Bridget asks.

  Alec speaks up and says, “No, we don’t want the kids walking in and seeing it.”

  “That’s a wise decision. We have been watching the news since we got home last night. The incident at the school is on every news station, including CNN and Fox News.”

  Doris adds, “They are comparing yesterday’s shooting to the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting, in which 20 first-grade children ages six and seven were killed on December 14th, 2012, and the Columbine High School massacre school shooting that occurred on April 20th, 1999, in which two teenaged boys killed 12 students and a teacher.”

  I shiver when I remember both of these school shootings. Molly and Brooke wipe away tears as Alec listens intently.

  “We don’t want our grandchildren or Brooke’s children going back to public schools. We came up with a plan and before you say no or tell us it won’t work, we want you to listen to us,” Millie states.

  Alec nods.

  “We all spent the night together researching home schooling and the qualifications it requires, and we came up with a plan. We want to homeschool the kids. There’s four of us here and we all can qualify to do it. We don’t work outside the home and we have the time to devote to it,” Cheryl says as she watches Alec.

  Doris says, “We can get the books and supplies we need in the next few days. Bridget and Millie are state testing today, and Cheryl and I are scheduled to test tomorrow. We have to pass a state test to qualify to homeschool. Fortunately, we can test in Tampa.”

  “May I ask something?” Alec asks.

  “Yes, go ahead,” Millie says.

  “Where would you do this? I mean, where will you teach the kids? You’ll have four children ranging from five to seven years old: our kids and Brooke’s two kids. You’ll need room for them to play and run,” Alec says.

  Good thinking. I didn’t think of that. Four children could destroy a house, I think to myself.

  “We thought about that and we think we found the perfect place. It’s centrally located to all of your jobs and if we can get it at an affordable rate, it’ll be perfect for a school house,” Millie says and everyone smiles. “It even has a playground.”

  “It sound too good to be true. Have you considered the cost of running a place like that?”

  Bridget says, “We have.”

  “You’ll have rent, utilities, and the cost of all your supplies.”

  “We know,” Doris says,

  Alec asks, “Where is it and how much are they asking?”

  “It’s Emma and James’ old house. It’s sitting empty and it will be perfect. It has a kitchen to prepare meals in, it has different rooms to teach different age groups and activities, and it has the jungle gym in the fenced-in backyard.”

  “Oh, my God, Emma. That is perfect,” Brooke whispers.

  I smile and look at Molly, who is also smiling. Molly and Brooke jump up and hug everyone. Alec smiles and looks at me before he walks over to me. “Looks like they have a great idea.”

  “It sounds like they have it all planned out, too,” he says as he hugs me.

  “We also have a name picked out,” Millie says as they all laugh.

  Alec and I smile and turn to look at them. “What name did you decide on?” I ask.

  “Grannie Nannies,” they all say in unison.

  “Grannie Nannies,” Alec and I repeat. “I love it,” I say.

  Alec, Molly, Brooke, and I walk around the room and hug everyone. This is the best idea — ever. Brooke is so excited. She tells me that after yesterday, she and Brice were talking about moving back to Oklahoma. But now, with the school issue solved, they won’t have to.

  “You guys woke us up,” Raelynn says as she and James slowly walk down the stairs. Rae is rubbing her eyes and James is carrying a stuffed animal.

  “I’m sorry, Rae and James,” Millie says as she walks over to them.

  Alec, Molly, Brooke, and I watch as all the grandmas walk over and attend to the kids. Bridget and Doris pick up the kids and place them on the couch. We smile as we listen to the grandmas explain the news to James and Raelynn about the new school. Both children smile and their eyes light up as they hear the details of their former house being turned into their very own school.

  “Our mothers are brilliant,” Molly says.

  “They sure are,” Alec agrees.

  I walk over to Brooke and say, “I know I offered the house to you and Brice so you can expand your business.”

  “Oh, please, Emma. This is a much better use for it. Something else will come up.”

  “Are you sure?” I ask.

  “I’m positive.”

  I get a text and check my phone. It’s from my dad.

  Dad: Don’t let them take all the credit for this. We guys had a hand in this grand scheme, too.

  Em
ma: I figured that.

  Dad: They did come up with the name Grannie Nannies. Who in the world would come up with a name like that?”

  Emma: It’s cute, I like it. What are you doing today?

  Dad: We are getting a sign made up for the school and shopping for school desks, chalk boards, and whatever else is on this list.

  Emma: Thank you, Dad. This means so much to us.

  Dad: You didn’t think we could let our grandkids return to public school, did you?

  Emma: No, but I never imagined this either. Thank you.

  Dad: You’re welcome, Kiddo. Kiss the kids for us, I gotta help load the truck.

  Emma: I love you, Dad.

  Dad: I love you, too.

  Alec gets a call and takes it outside on the lanai. I see an emotion on his face I can’t place. I excuse myself and follow him outside. Sitting on the swing I watch as he paces back and forth. The ticking has returned in his jaw — a clear sign he is upset.

  “Just one minute,” he says as he cups his hand over the phone. “It’s the Manatee Tribune; they want an interview about yesterday.”

  “How did they find you?”

  “I have no idea.” I walk over to him and he says, “I need to give them a quick phone interview. I’ll be just a minute.”

  I kiss him before going back into the house. James seems to be feeling better as does Raelynn. I know this is a big relief for everyone. I am amazed they came up with this idea and how well they have it all planned out. Excitement has filled the somber mood of the house. We stay home and the grandmas, Brooke, and Molly leave. Molly asks if she can come back after her Addicts Anonymous meeting this evening, and Raelynn is happy that she’ll get to see her mother again today.

  Molly

  I go home and shower, and then I go straight to church. My little girl is safe, and I have so much to be thankful for. My mother, with the mothers of Alec, Emma, and her deceased husband have come together to create a safe haven for our kids to attend school. My mother dropped me off at home today and left like she was on a mission.

  I go to the same church where the Addicts Anonymous meetings are held. I know they leave the side door open for people to come and pray. I pray and don’t ask God for anything. I pray to thank my God. Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for keeping Raelynn, James, and Alec safe yesterday. Thank you so much for having Alec know exactly what to do. Dear God, thank you so much for making it possible for, not just ours, but for all the children, to go home safely to their loved ones. It was all very frightening, but I have so much to be thankful for today. Although it may take some time, with love and support Raelynn will be able to recover fully. In your name I pray, Amen.