Chasing Circumstance

by Redmon, Dina

  I accepted the envelope from her, kissed her on the cheek, and left. This was going to be one of the most difficult things I had ever done, but I knew I had no choice in the matter because Jo always got what she wanted. That’s why she was the boss.

  I waited to open the envelope until I got home. Throwing my bags on the floor, I sat on the couch and opened it. I was sure it was spending money for the trip.

  I was mistaken. It was a gift card to Neiman Marcus in the amount of five thousand dollars! Holy shit! There was also a note from Jo.

  “My dearest Amia,

  I want my fun loving friend back; the one that has never given up on finding her one true love. Use this to get something special and find yourself again. Show Stuart what he gave up. Show him what he could have had in you. Show him just how much love you have to offer and how much of a lady you are. Oh, did I forget to mention you will be attending a ball? Noraprise is throwing it to announce their newest software release. It is the night before your meeting with them. Enjoy yourself, and don’t hate me too much.

  Love you much,

  Jo.”

  A ball? Was she fucking kidding me? Jo was lucky I loved her so much. Now I had to get dressed up and go shopping. One did not walk into Neiman Marcus in street clothes to shop for a ball gown.

  After getting dressed, I walked outside and flagged down a taxi. Giving the driver directions to my destination, I sat back in the seat and thought of the week in front of me. I wasn’t sure how I would pull it off, but I knew I had to. Not only was Jo counting on me, but my broken heart was as well.

  I jumped back into reality as the taxi pulled up in front of Neiman Marcus. Paying the driver, I stepped onto the sidewalk and stared at the department store. Taking a deep breath, I opened the doors and walked in.

  Immediately, I could smell the perfume counter. It was my first stop. I had always wanted a signature scent and it was time for me to have one. Choosing one of the more sweet and innocent scents, I paid for my purchase and headed toward the clothing department. I had never spent three hundred dollars as easily as I had on my perfume.

  Two hours, and five gowns later, I ended up choosing a David Meister Signature gown. It had a one-shoulder neckline with a sleeveless left arm and a cutout detail on the shoulder. The pleated skirt fell from the waist to the floor and flowed beautifully. It was teal with a black leaf design printed on tulle, and it made me feel like a princess.

  The attendant helped me to find the perfect shoes as well. They were Fendi, Aurora, strappy crystal, suede sandals with six inch heels and an open toe. There were crystal accents over the opening at the top of the shoe and on the straps that wrapped around my ankle.

  I almost fainted when I checked out and was told the final amount after adding a pair of earrings and a necklace to the ensemble… $5,342.71. Okay, so I spent a bit more than the gift card allowance, but it was completely worth it.

  When I arrived home, I put on my gown, shoes and jewelry, took a picture and sent it to Jo. Since she was the one that bankrolled the shopping excursion, I thought she should see the beautiful butterfly that had emerged from her cocoon.

  “You look A-Fucking-Mazing!” Jo’s text said it all.

  I carefully packed my gown and the accoutrements I had purchased to go with it. Scanning my closet, I chose seven more outfits for my five day trip and placed them in the suitcase as well.

  “Pack your sexiest lingerie.” Jo’s words echoed through my brain. “FINE!” I answered her out loud, though I knew she couldn’t hear me. I searched through my dresser drawers and chose a pink and black silk corset with matching panties and stockings. If it were to come down to it, I was sure this outfit would do the trick.

  A glass of wine, a hot bubble bath, and soft music were the perfect ending to my day. I crawled into bed and felt the silkiness of the sheets against my freshly shaved skin. Memories of Stuart permeated my thoughts as I drifted off to sleep.

  I awoke the next morning before the alarm sounded. Of course, my before bed thoughts caused me to dream sweet, sensual dreams of Stuart. Stupid Jo! Thanks for putting those thoughts in my head.

  Though I was nervous about meeting Stuart and what would come of that, I was excited for the trip. It had been a couple of years since I had traveled out of the country. The last excursion had been a fun-filled, weeklong trip with Jo to the Bahamas. This would be my first time traveling outside the country by myself.

  Although I had woken up early, I still rushed around completing all of my pre-trip tasks before I had to leave. I watered my plants; made sure the windows were locked, showered, dressed, grabbed my bags, and ran downstairs just in time to hail a passing cab.

  I offered the driver a large tip if he got me to the airport on time. Thankfully, he did just that. Albeit, I do believe he broke quite a few traffic laws while fulfilling my request. When we stopped in front of the airport, I paid the fare plus an extra fifty bucks as a tip. It was a good thing Jo paid me so well.

  Once I made it through the security check points, I found my way to the gate and waited to be called to board the plane. I was a bit surprised there weren’t a lot of people on the flight and wondered how many people actually traveled from New York to Scotland every year. Hearing the attendant call the seat numbers that my ticket was a part of, I shrugged off the thought, stood, gathered my carryon luggage, and boarded the flight.

  Jo had gone all out for me on this trip and had booked me a first class ticket on the company’s dime.

  It was quiet and spacious, so I took full advantage of it. As I snuggled into my seat, my mind raced with thoughts of Stuart. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw his smile, heard his laugh and whispered words of, ‘I love you, Amia.’ Tears flowed down my cheeks as I fell into a deep slumber, only to awake as the plane was landing in Glasgow.

  Making my way through customs, I walked to the front of the airport to find a taxi. As I approached the doors, I saw a driver holding a sign with my name on it. “Thank you, Jo.” I mumbled the words through my smile. She really was something special.

  The driver took my luggage, introduced himself to me and explained that Jo had hired a limousine and driver for me for the entire trip. I felt completely spoiled.

  As he opened the door for me I asked, “Jeffrey? I seemed to have misplaced my trip itinerary. Do you happen to know where my hotel is?”

  “Yes, Ma’am, leave it to me; I’ll get you there.” He smiled as he closed the door. A couple of minutes later and we were on our way.

  We pulled up in front of the Blythswood Square hotel. It was beyond impressive. I knew that Jo enjoyed the finer things in life but I was a simple woman. I did, however, decide to indulge myself on this trip. Especially since the company was paying for it.

  After I checked in, I was shown to a private elevator that opened to the penthouse suite. As I entered the room, the bellhop sat my luggage down; I tipped him and shut the door. Turning, I just stared at the space in front of me. It was an entire floor of the hotel and was stunningly beautiful with modern décor set in a splendid, landmark building. To the right sat a full kitchen with all of the amenities. There was a side by side refrigerator with a matching stainless steel stove and sink set in a marble countertop. Connected to the kitchen through a large stone covered archway was a formal dining room with a gigantic walnut table and eight matching chairs. The Victorian decorated living area flanked both rooms, and to the left of that was the door that led into the master suite. Contemporary furnishings filled the room to include a king sized bed set against a black velvet, tufted headboard and matching end tables at each side of the bed. Daylight cascaded through the magnificent glass French doors that led out to a balcony. The history was extremely apparent as I stepped out onto the private terrace area. I was here… I was finally here.

  I went back into the room and called Jo. “Hi and thank you so much for the first class accommodations. I feel altogether spoiled.” I couldn’t hold back my excitement even if someone had paid me.

&nbs
p; “You deserve the indulgence. Enjoy it. You’ve earned it.” Jo sounded as if I had woken her.

  “I’m sorry. I forgot about the time difference. I’ll let you get back to sleep and will call you later. Love you!” I hung up the phone before she could answer me.

  What to do now? I spun around with my arms out, just enjoying the moment. I felt like a little girl playing princess in a castle.

  A bath! Yes, a bath would do nicely. I phoned room service and asked for their nicest bottle of sweet, red wine. It was promptly delivered. Once again, I tipped the gentleman that brought it and walked into the bathroom.

  It was absolutely glorious! There was an elegant dressing table next to the sink and a handcrafted Spanish marble bathtub. Turning on the faucet, I sat at the edge of the tub and just watched the water flow over the soft lines of the stone. It was as if I were witnessing the creation of an exquisite piece of living art. Rousing myself from the thought, I gathered the luxurious towels, set them next to the bath, turned on the stereo, and poured myself a glass of wine.

  Stepping out of my travel clothes, I slid into the hot waters that awaited me. I allowed them to wash away my thoughts as I sipped my wine and listened to the soft music that played through the surround sound speakers. If there were such thing as heaven, this was it.

  Drinking wine in a hot bath after such a long journey proved to be a silly choice. I woke to cold water and wrinkly skin after falling asleep for almost two hours. Had the temperature not gotten cold, I probably would have slept much longer.

  Chilled from the coolness of the bath, my teeth chattered as I wrapped up in one of the warm, soft towels. I twisted another around my hair and looked into the mirror. I looked ten years younger. “Must be something in the water.” Smiling, I walked into the bedroom and reclined on the plushest bed I had ever felt. The duvet hugged me into its warmth, and I quickly fell asleep once again.

  Waking refreshed and feeling like a new woman, I put on one of the robes provided and made myself a pot of coffee. I sat at the table in the dining room and waited for it to finish brewing. It smelled phenomenal with a strong hint of hazelnut.

  Retrieving a cup of coffee, I wandered out to the terrace once again. The sun was just starting its descent below the chimney tops of Glasgow. The soft oranges and reds of the sunset reminded me of pictures that Stuart had shared with me. A heavy sigh escaped my throat as I sat there alone, enjoying what he and I were supposed to experience together. Tears flowed from my eyes at the thought.

  I sat there until the sun disappeared into the night sky. The sounds of the city changed around me. It went from the growl of cars traveling along its busy streets to the soft echoes of music filtering out from the many pubs and restaurants that lined the roads below me.

  Deciding to stop wallowing in the pains of the past, I dressed and headed out for dinner. My car and driver were called to meet me at the front door and we were off once again. I thought of what it would be like to accidentally run into Stuart, but the thought quickly left my mind when I saw the nightlife before me. There were people lined up waiting to get into dance clubs, outdoor cafes overflowed with customers, and couples walked hand in hand down the street as if they hadn’t a care in the world.

  I asked Jeffrey to take me to the best restaurant in the area. Half an hour later, we arrived at Martin Wishart at Loch Lomond in Balloch. It was situated inside a resort hotel and set against a breathtaking landscape. The shadows of the mountains, cast by the moonlight, danced across the water’s edge as the stars twinkled their mirrored images across the stillness of the lake.

  After being seated and ordering a bottle of their finest wine, I looked at the menu to make my selection. I couldn’t decide what I was in the mood for so I went all out. After all, I was finally in Scotland and wanted to experience everything this magical place had to offer. I ordered razor clams topped with cauliflower cream sauce, king oyster mushrooms with sauce grand veneur that was made by reducing red wine, and lemon curd with passion fruit jelly.

  The food was presented in such a beautiful fashion that I hesitated to eat it. The earthy color of the mushrooms and clams, combined with the green kale they were laid upon, was set off by the intense red color of the sauce. Deep, rich aromas filled the air and made the meal even more appetizing. Reluctantly, I sliced into the delicateness of the mushrooms. They were indescribably delicious, and I savored each mouthwatering bite that had been placed before me.

  Upon finishing my meal, I paid the tab, tipped the waiter, and went outside. The night air was cool against my skin and I could feel the dampness in the breeze that wafted across the lake. Stopping to admire the view, I wrapped my shawl around my shoulders and wished that Stuart was there to warm me instead.

  I returned to where Jeffrey was waiting for me with the car and watched out the window as we headed back to the hotel. Scotland truly was a magnificent place. I would have been happy living here the rest of my life had it all worked out, but alas, it was not meant to be.

  I changed into warm pajamas after arriving back at the hotel and made myself a cup of hot cocoa. I sat in the living room staring at the art on the walls and thinking about the ball that was taking place tomorrow night. The thought of finally meeting Stuart face to face frightened me to my core. Did he know I was here? If he did, why hadn’t he reached out to contact me?

  “Ugh! Just shake it off!” I spoke to myself out loud. If anyone could have heard me, they would have thought I was crazy, and they would have been right.

  Setting my cup on the counter, I picked up my laptop and signed into my blog. I knew that writing about my adventures would help bring some closure to my day and help me rest.

  “Dear You,

  Where do I even begin to describe my day? After arriving in Scotland, I slept most of the day away thanks to sheer exhaustion, a hot bath, and a bottle of wine. I awoke just in time to witness the most beautiful sunset it has ever been my pleasure to see. Dinner was more than incredible, and I cannot possibly find the right words to describe it at this time. I believe my words are lost in the fog of my emotions.

  Tomorrow night is the grand ball. He will be there. The same he that healed my heart, claimed it as his own and shattered it against a wall of lies and deceit.

  How will I face him? What will I say? How will I hold back the tears?

  I realize I must reach deep inside and pull from my inner strength. I need to show him that he no longer holds power over me and no longer resides in my heart. He has to know that I will not shed another tear over the loss of him. I have to find a way to lie.

  Will he be able to see through my façade? Is it possible that he knows me so well that he will know I’m lying? Will he reach out to take away my pain?

  See? There I go again! I’m getting all wrapped up in that fairytale ending! “And they lived happily ever after…” What a line of shit!

  I should probably close for now. I think the combination of the wine and my total exhaustion may be going to my head.

  So tonight, dear readers, I leave you with this question…

  Is there such a thing as “happily ever after”?

  ~Amia”

  CHAPTER FOUR

  I spent the morning lounging around my hotel room and simply relaxing until early afternoon. I debated calling Stuart to find out if he knew I was here and that he would be meeting with me, but eventually decided against it. I think I was scared of his reaction.

  After soaking in the bath and doing all the girly things one tends to do in there, I began to get ready for the ball. My dress had been steamed by the hotel staff so that it would be perfect. I sat, wrapped in a towel, in front of the dressing mirror in the bathroom and just looked at myself. Though I looked as I always did with the same blue eyes and same brown hair, I couldn’t seem to find my self-confidence. I jokingly wondered if it had flowed down the drain with the bath water.

  “Well, I guess I should start with my hair.” I don’t know who I was talking to, but the words left my lips as if
I were speaking to someone other than myself. I had never been to a ball before, so I did a bit of internet research to find an appropriate hair style.

  I decided to curl my hair into drop curls and pin some of the tendrils to the top of my head allowing the remainder to flow softly down the back and sides. I liked how natural and soft it felt across my shoulders and the sides of my face. When it was all in place, I pinned strands of crystals into the curls and sprayed it lightly with hairspray to help hold it.

  I applied a moisturizer to my face and then sipped at a glass of wine to give it time to work before applying my make-up. The moisturizer felt cool and creamy against my skin. I was beginning to feel pampered. I had considered taking advantage of the gorgeous spa in the hotel but decided against it. I was simply too nervous to be around people right now.

  When I finished applying my make-up, I sprayed perfume over my entire body. I decided against stockings and wore only my corset and matching panties under my gown. The tulle was soft against my bare skin and it made me feel sexy and daring. Slipping on my new Fendi heels, I grabbed my black lace shawl, my sequined handbag, and walked into the awaiting private elevator.

  As the doors to the lift opened and I stepped out, I felt the eyes of the people in the lobby watching me. I smiled a shy grin, lifted my chin in feigned confidence, and walked outside where my driver awaited my arrival.

  “You look stunning tonight, Miss Amia.” Jeffrey complimented me while he opened the door to the limousine and took my hand as I sat down.

  “Why thank you, Jeffrey. I feel stunning.” I smiled at him, and he closed the door.

  The butterflies burst in my stomach as the car started moving. This was it, I was about to meet Stuart face to face. I sat in utter silence throughout the drive while I tried to collect my thoughts and get my nerves under control. It was a pointless exercise.