“What did you do, Ms. Parker?”
Malakai’s question jerked her back to the present.
“I said no. I had to say it a hundred different ways and times, but I said no.”
His eyebrows drew together, and his lips firmed. Tessa knew what he thought. “It sounds easy, but it wasn’t. I never knew if I would get beat up or if someone would plant drugs on me because I said no, but I said no.”
Malaki looked at her, and Tessa saw a twelve-year-old boy instead of a one trying to act like a man.
“No one gets how hard it is, Ms. Parker. I feel like I’m the only one saying no and it would be easier to just say yes.”
Panic flooded her, but she maintained her calmness and eye contact. “I know it feels like everyone around you is being drawn to drugs or gangs, and most probably are. That’s why you must use school and this center as a stepping stone. You might not ever need to know what earth science is, but it could open a door for something that interests you. Something that interests you enough to not care what is happening in this very small corner of the earth. Something that will propel you out of here.”
Malakai studied her while he digested her words. Tessa held her breath, hoping he wouldn’t dismiss what she said as nonsense.
“It didn’t work for you, Ms. Parker. You’re still here. Why would it work for me?”
Tessa smiled at how perceptive he was. “I went to college on scholarships, and I worked a couple of jobs while attending. I’m doing what I want to do, Malakai. I’m helping kids like you get out of that life.”
He turned his head to Jordan. “What about you, Mr. Davis? Did you come from this neighborhood?”
_________________________
It took a second for Jordan to answer Malakai’s question. He was thinking about what Tessa had said. He’d known the neighborhood she’d grown up in, but he’d never actually comprehended the daily stress she’d encountered. He’d just assumed that she’d struggled with money and material things, not violence, drugs, and gang life.
Now he got how $2,000 would be a lifesaver for her. He’d never understood why she’d asked for such an insignificant amount, but it wasn’t a small amount to her.
Tessa turned and glared at him while she jerked her head in Malakai’s direction. He knew she’d reached him with her honesty and sincerity, so he tried to do the same.
“No, I grew up filthy rich. I never gave money a second thought.”
Some stars left Malakai’s eyes, and Tessa still stared daggers at him.
“But I still had to turn down drugs. It was different, though. I didn’t feel like I would be in danger for refusing, but I still had to say no. Ever since I can remember, I wanted to play basketball, and I wasn’t willing to put drugs in my body and sacrifice my dream.”
He had Malakai’s interest again, and Tessa’s, so he continued. “I was lucky. I’ve known that I wanted to play basketball since elementary school. My parents had the money to help me make my dream come true, but I still had to work for it.”
“What do you mean?” Malakai asked while turning to fully face him.
“It means I put in hour after hour of studying the players I wanted to be like and then more hours practicing how to do it. I remember practicing basketball while my friends were off doing fun things. Ms. Parker even helped me.”
Malakai’s eyebrows jumped up his forehead. “Ms. Parker helped you?”
He looked between them while Jordan turned his attention to Tessa. “Yes. In college I had trouble in a composition class, and she helped me get through it.”
Tessa’s eyes softened before she looked down.
“Isn’t composition writing?” Malakai’s puzzled question drew Jordan’s gaze back to him.
“Yes, and I sucked at it. I have a technical mind, and when my professors asked me to make stuff up, I was baffled. Even then, Ms. Parker was the best teacher. She knew how to draw out my creative side.”
“Wow, Ms. Parker, you get to say you helped Jordan Davis get through college!”
Tessa looked at Malakai and then turned her soft eyes on him. “He could’ve done it without me, but I was happy to help.”
Jordan liked the way Tessa was actually looking at him and not through him. He had forgotten what a rush it was to have her admiration instead of her guarded, suspicious face. Jordan shook his head to clear it and turned his attention back to Malaki. He couldn’t let Tessa draw him in.
“Everyone needs help, Malakai. If I were you, I would grab what Ms. Parker and the Center are offering you.”
Malakai nodded, and just that quick, it was like the conversation hadn’t happened. “Can I go now, Ms. Parker?”
Tessa smiled. “Yes. I’ll see you on Thursday. And this time, try to get here on time, Malakai.”
He hopped up from his chair, answering as he sailed through the door, “Will do, Ms. Parker!”
The silence after Malakai left was stifling, but it didn’t stop Jordan from tracking Tessa’s nervous movements. She tapped her pencil, straightened her pile of papers, and picked up her phone. Finally, she looked over at him and drew a breath before surprising the hell out of him.
“Thank you for talking with Malakai. What you said will have more of an impact on him than anything I could have.”
She said it with sadness, like she’d failed to reach him. Jordan might disagree with Tessa’s actions four years ago, but he couldn’t let her leave thinking she didn’t have an effect on Malakai.
“You’re wrong.”
Her surprise and confusion were clear. Jordan elaborated, “As soon as you said you lived in this neighborhood, you had his full attention. When you told him you said no to drugs, you had his empathy. But when you said it was hard to say no, you had his respect. He knew you weren’t bullshitting him like I’m sure many adults in his life have done.”
She looked down. “Thank you.”
As she gathered her things and stood, Jordan stopped her with his question. It shouldn’t matter, but his curiosity nagged him.
“How come you never told me all of that when we were together?”
Tessa stilled and bit her lip as she looked up at him. Even as his attention laser-focused on her lips, and his body stirred, he listened.
“It’s not something that came up in our conversations. Our worlds were—are—so different. It’s not something you could relate to. And I didn’t think about it much in college. I had finally gotten into a new world, and I didn’t want to dwell on where I had come from.”
He considered her words. They were fair. Even now, hearing what she and Malakai lived through was not something he could understand. Then he remembered something.
“Whatever happened to Declan?”
Tessa’s mouth dropped open. “You remember him?”
“Why wouldn’t I? You talked about him every day during the semester you student taught.” It stung that she didn’t think he would remember something so important to her.
Her face cleared. “Sorry, I didn’t realize how much I talked about him.”
Now he was pissed. “Don’t fucking apologize for talking to your boyfriend about something important to you!”
Tessa’s head reared back, and she opened her mouth to say something but snapped it shut. Stiltedly she answered, “Last I heard he had joined a gang and been involved in a drive-by shooting.”
“I’m sorry, Tessa. I know it was important to you to make a connection and try to steer him clear of that shit.”
Her mouth flung open in shock again, and she appeared to be unable to talk. Maybe this was a good time to change the subject to the reason he had stormed down here to begin with.
“Can we talk about a schedule for Jordis?”
He could see the shutters come down over Tessa’s face.
“I’m not trying to keep you apart, Jordan. My schedule is different every day, so it’s hard to set up time too far in advance.”
Jordan studied her and didn’t see any deception. “How about a week in a
dvance?” There shouldn’t be any reason she couldn’t do that.
Tessa nodded. “That should work. Do you want to go through our schedules now?”
___________________
Chapter 18
___________________
It had been a couple of weeks, and so far coordinating their schedules had worked out. Each time they talked or were together, it was like they were awkward acquaintances. It was difficult to believe that once upon a time, they’d had a hard time not touching each other when they were in the same room.
The air still crackled when they were together. Tessa tried to pretend it was the uneasiness between them that she felt. When they accidentally touched, it wasn’t as easy to deceive herself. It would take an extra second or two for her skin to stop buzzing and several discreet deep breaths to get her breathing back to normal.
Jordan wasn’t uncomfortable with Jordis like he was with her. At first he seemed a little unsure around her. Tessa didn’t know if it was because he wasn’t used to being around young kids or if he was trying to make sure he made a good impression on her.
One night when they were together, she saw the uneasiness vanish as soon as Jordan picked up a basketball in the living room and asked Jordis if she wanted to play.
“Yes. I good!”
He squatted down and grabbed the little basketball. “Oh yeah? I’m pretty good too. Remember I told you I played basketball? That’s my job. You can watch me playing on TV.”
Jordis’s eyes got huge. “Mommy and me watch basketball on TV!”
Jordan looked up at her with a crease between his eyes. Tessa breathed out when he turned back to Jordis and pulled out his phone. After pulling up a screen, he turned it to show her. “That’s my team and me.”
Jordis grabbed his phone with one hand and pulled him toward the couch with her other hand. Jordan looked a little bemused as he followed Jordis’s silent orders and sat down on the couch. He sat her on his lap, and Tessa’s heart fractured a little at seeing them connect.
It would no longer be just her and Jordis. Her time being her entire world was over. Before either of them noticed her emotional state, Tessa quietly walked out of the room and shut herself in with her mom. Together they watched Wheel of Fortune.
Tessa was currently busy trying to sweep the kitchen floor and pick up all of the stray items lying around. The apartment was only 800 square feet, so it only took a few toys or shoes to make it look cluttered.
She stared longingly at the couch but kept moving. If she sat down, there was no way she would get back up. The constant on-the-go pace and interrupted sleep—thanks to her daughter, who liked to visit her in the middle of the night—were wearing her down. Periodically, she thought about giving up her cleaning job. It seemed like she and Jordan were working things out between them, but she didn’t trust it to last.
Tonight when Jordan got there, they were going to the park. The plan was to play basketball and then go out to eat. After they got back, Tessa would go to SEC and then to her cleaning job.
The doorbell rang just as she put the last toy into a basket, and Jordis came running down the hall. Her upper body moved ahead of her feet, and she tripped and fell. Tessa was headed to the door too, but she stopped when Jordis fell. Jordis’s lip quivered like she was going to cry, but the second knock on the door distracted her. She jumped up and once again raced toward the door.
Tessa reached it first but allowed Jordis to squeeze in front of her. As Jordis stretched up onto her tiptoes and reached for the knob, Tessa put her hand on top of her daughter’s.
“Jordis.”
Her stern tone made her look up.
“What do you do before you open the door?”
Jordis scrunched her face together. “It Jordan.” Her face got tighter and turned red.
“This door will not open until you ask who it is, Jordis. If you don’t listen to me, you won’t be allowed to see Jordan tonight.”
Tessa had a stare-down with her three-year-old daughter and released a breath when Jordis’s hand lowered and she yelled out, “WHO IS IT?”
Tessa winced at the volume.
“It’s Jordan.”
Jordis’s face lit up, and this time Tessa didn’t stop her hand. Tessa unlocked the deadbolt and chain just in time for Jordis to swing the door open, hold up her hands, and yell, “Jordan!”
He swung her up into his arms and carried her farther inside while Jordis babbled the entire time.
“I bounce ball six times and made bastet free times.” Jordis held up three fingers, and Jordan sat down with her on his lap.
“I’m so proud, Jordis. Did you make your three baskets the way I showed you?”
Jordis nodded her head. “Yes. I look at bastet and frow the ball like you!”
Tessa knew she had to interrupt. Otherwise, the two of them would go on and on.
“How about we go to the park?”
Jordis slid down off Jordan’s lap. “I get ball.”
She toddled down to their room to get the small pink basketball Jordan had bought her. The ball was never too far away.
“And your sweatshirt!” Tessa advised her daughter.
With Jordis gone, the stifling silence took over. Reluctantly, she turned back to Jordan. “Hello.”
Jordan’s lips quirked. “Good evening, Tessa.”
Was he making fun of her? She narrowed her eyes at his bland expression and decided to let it go. She wasn’t sure how to act around him anymore, but she didn’t want to fight.
“I’ll grab my coat.” Tessa swiveled and went down the hall to hide in Sophia’s room. She waited like a coward until she heard Jordis going back down the hall.
The ride to the park was comfortable with Jordis and Jordan chatting the entire way. Tessa sat in the passenger seat and let the conversation flow over her. It was the first chance she’d had to sit down and do nothing that day.
She sighed internally when they arrived at the park. During their previous visits Tessa had tried to sit on the court's sidelines, but Jordis wanted her to play too. She willed some energy into her body to be present for her daughter. They didn’t get to spend a lot of quality time together, so Tessa wanted to make sure she gave Jordis her full attention when they did.
Tonight Jordis wanted to see her dribble the ball up and down the court like Jordan did. After about the third time up and down the court, her vision blurred. Tessa realized the apples she’d had for breakfast and lunch and the numerous cups of coffee throughout the day were not sufficient for this activity.
She stopped at the half-court line and drew in some breaths. When her vision cleared, she took a couple of tentative steps and then raised her head. Jordan swayed in front of her. She ran a hand over her face and plastered on a smile.
“Jordis, Mommy is going to take a break.”
She heard Jordis’s sweet voice, but she couldn’t make out her words. Tessa also vaguely heard Jordan’s deep baritone and tried to focus on him, but then the ground rushed up to meet her.
___________________
Chapter 19
___________________
“Tessa?” Jordan had never seen anyone actually look as white as a ghost until now.
One minute she was standing there, patiently telling an energized Jordis that she was taking a break. The next second, she wilted to the ground.
“Tessa!” he swore as he ran to catch her before she landed on the concrete court.
“Mommy!”
Jordis’s tiny, scared voice penetrated through Jordan’s thudding heartbeat. He wasn’t in time to catch Tessa, so he fell to his knees and checked her throat for a pulse. Jordan let out a shaky breath when he felt it, faint but steady.
He reached for Jordis, who was wide-eyed and crying right beside him. With sudden clarity, he realized everyone needed to understand that he was Jordis’s father. If Tessa wasn’t okay, he needed to be able to take care of Jordis.
“What’s wrong with Mommy?” she hiccupped out in a small vo
ice between sobs.
This was the first time Jordan had ever heard Jordis be anything other than confident or bossy. He held her to him. She curled up against his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck and laying her cheek on his shoulder.
“Mommy is okay, Jordis.”
Her crying slowed, and her thumb went into her mouth.
“She just fainted, sweetheart.” Jordan hoped that’s all it was. “In a few minutes she’ll be better, but I need to pick her up and get her to the truck. Can you be a big girl and walk right beside me?”
Jordan’s heart cracked at the vulnerability and indecisiveness on Jordis’s face as she looked between him and Tessa, still laying motionless on the ground.
“’Kay,” her small voice whispered.
Jordan stared fiercely into Jordis’s eyes. “I promise she will be okay.”
He kissed the top of her head and squeezed her one more time before he put her down.
“You go get our ball and then follow me to the truck.”
Jordis’s trembling hands came up to her mouth, and she stared up at him and then back longingly at Tessa. He realized Jordis didn’t want to let Tessa out of her sight.
“You get the ball. We won’t go anywhere until you’re by my side.”
Jordis sped off to the other side of the court to retrieve her precious pink basketball.
Jordan slid his arm under Tessa’s neck, making sure his bicep supported her head, and placed his other arm under her knees. He frowned at how light she was, even as dead weight. Standing easily, he tracked Jordis’s progress and waited patiently. Well, at least on the outside.
On the inside, he urged her little legs to go faster. He didn’t like how long Tessa had been unconscious, and he was debating whether to go to a clinic or the emergency room when she twitched in his arms.
His eyes snapped down in time to see her eyebrows draw in and her chest expand in her quest to get more air into her lungs. Her eyelids slowly opened, and her puzzled gray eyes latched onto his. His heart clenched at the scared, confused look she displayed. Seconds later, it was gone, and she frantically looked around.
Jordan's Justice: A New Adult Sport Romance (Tessa and Jordan Book 2) Page 8
