It's a Fugly Life

by Mimi Jean Pamfiloff

  However, the best part of all wasn’t the peace and joy I felt having her in my arms, but watching Max’s expression when he held her for the first time. For eight months, we had worked at LLL and we had planned for Iris. We spent as much time alone as we could, knowing that we needed time together as husband and wife before our lives changed again. We ate out. We ate in. We took weekend trips. We jogged in the mornings. We made love. A lot. In eight months, we made Max’s house into a home and opened five new LLL locations. It was crazy and exciting, but every day I woke up hearing Max tell me how much he loved me and how lucky he felt. And I knew we were going to change the world for Iris, and she would never feel ugly.

  Iris came in the middle of the night, and Max was a mess, all panicked and trying to be in charge, but having absolutely zero control over what happened next.

  “Just stay strong, Lily,” he kept saying over and over again. “I love you. You can do this.”

  “Shut up. You stay strong! You first!” I’d screamed with the terrible contractions.

  Then she arrived.

  It was like the entire world disappeared, and all Maxwell Cole could see was her. Just her. I can’t recall ever seeing a man look at something with so much love. And I could swear that little baby, only a few minutes old, looked right back at him with complete and utter adoration as he held her in his arms.

  “Uh-oh,” I said. “I think we’re going to have a big problem.”

  Max snapped out of his new-daddy daze, but still had a shit-eating grin. “What’s that?”

  “You’re going to spoil her. I can see it in your eyes.”

  “I’m going to spoil you first, Lily. You were amazing.” He returned to beaming at Iris. “Didn’t your pretty mommy do a great job?” He kissed her little forehead and spoke in baby talk. “Isn’t dat right, my wittle Iris. We’re going to spoil Mommy and you’re going to be a daddy’s girl.”

  I laughed. “No way. She’s going to be independent and strong like her mom. None of the prissy entitled crap.”

  Max’s face went all serious. “I’ll make you a deal; the first one I get to spoil, and you can do what you like with the second one.”

  I cringed. My body felt like it had gone through a meat grinder. Pregnancy was not my friend right now.

  “Why don’t we focus on this one, and after I’m healed, I’ll race you for her.”

  Max nodded his head. “A very smart man did say once that if you wanted something, you had to fight for it.”

  “Exactly. And, of course, I will so win.”

  “Because you play dirty.” He referred to the fact that he’d made me race him for that trip to Milan. I’d won by pulling my shirt off and sprinting for the finish line. It had been nighttime, but Max had still tripped. I won.

  Okay, he won. He’d won me.

  “All right. That’s enough.” I held out my arms. “Let me hold her again before my parents get here.”

  “Nope. She’s mine.” Max sat down and started blowing little kisses at her. “Muah! Muah. You love your daddy, don’t you?”

  Seriously. My heart melted. I could look at the two of them all day. “And to think, I almost walked away from this.”

  I had come very close to letting my fugly voice tell me lies again, but I’d won the battle. That didn’t mean I didn’t have more growing to do, but things felt different now. I saw my life and myself more clearly. And I had Max and Iris to thank for it.

  As for the rest of the world, I’d learned I couldn’t let anything they said or did get between me and the things that really mattered.

  Those photos of “Max and Adeline,” by the way? What a goddamned scandal. Ready for this? It turned out that Patricio had been producing a movie—his big indie debut. Though they changed the names to Lilah and Mick in the film to avoid getting sued, the movie was about me and Max. That total pig-woman Adeline, of all of the people in the goddamned world, would play me. Some Max look-alike played Max, and Patricio would play himself.

  Such a horrible rat turd of a man. In the press, he claimed that what started out as just research—aka pursuing me—for the film turned into true love after a few dates. I suspected, however, it might have been more about the publicity. I mean, let’s face it, the paparazzi had conveniently shown up a few times when Patricio and I were together. I also wondered if his desire to marry me was more about his ego than anything else. He wouldn’t want to film a movie ending that made him look bad, right? And he definitely saw losing “the girl” to Maxwell Cole as a blow to his ego. Whatever his true feelings, I didn’t know, and I didn’t care. Because I’d made my choice. I chose Max. I chose me. I chose a good life for Iris.

  I looked at Max holding his tiny daughter in his arms and my heart swelled. Life really could be so beautiful. If you just let it.

  The End. (Yes. For real this time.)

  Hello, My Beauties!

  As always, I want to thank you for reading and hope you got something worthwhile out of reading Max and Lily’s story (fun, a laugh, some steamy-fuel, or something to think about). I know this story didn’t have the huge twists and turns (or fancy unicorns, LOL) like my other books, but I really wanted to honor the underlying meaning of the first book. I wanted this book to be the continuation of Lily’s internal story. I mean, yes, plenty of external events happen to her, but really this was about Lily figuring out how to cope with her fugly voice—the one many of us have, hate with a passion, and would like to shove down a deep dark well. (Raise your hand if you’ve ever told yourself you’re too fat or not pretty or not smart enough. Raise your hand if you’ve been telling yourself that since you were old enough to know what fat, pretty, or smart were.)

  But before I get to the deeper stuff, let’s get swag out of the way! I have signed fugly bookmarks (they’re actually not fucking ugly, they’re kinda cute!) for those who want a little keepsake. First-come basis! Just shoot me your shipping address, full name, and be sure to mention if you posted an awesome review so I can include an IT’S A FUGLY LIFE magnet for your collection as a thank you! (I’m lovin’ the pics, by the way, some of you are sending of your fridges covered in Mimi swag. Nice!) Send emails to: mimi@mimijean.net.

  All right, now that we have that out of the way, here are some insights about the book. (And for those who love the playlist, don’t miss it at the end!)

  One, while this story is primarily about Lily not allowing her negativity to degrade the quality of her life or keep her from her goals, the story was also about Lily having to make peace with herself and her fugly voice. Because she’d realized that having her face reconstructed didn’t do a darn thing for her insides, she needed to find another way to move forward. She needed to face the truth. And for her that meant accepting she didn’t really know how to be honest with herself. She made choices that masked or distracted her from the real issues and emotional pain. Opening a boutique wasn’t bad, but she knew she could do better. Patricio wasn’t right for her, yet she’d convinced herself he was.

  Then Max came back and made her question everything. He represents the truth, Lily’s truth. He represents the happiness, love, and prosperity she was keeping from herself. It was difficult, scary, and painful for her to accept the truth (aka Max), but once she did, she knew it was the only way to live her life with any kind of peace or joy.

  As for Max’s mom, in the first book (and this one), she represents the fugly voice. She hates Lily, she wants to destroy Lily, she wants to sabotage Lily’s chances for happiness with Max. Lily’s shrink tells her to make peace with her fugly voice because it’s there and it’s a part of her, but Lily puts up a fight. And when she violently confronts Max’s mother (really her fugly voice), she learns that she’s the only one who loses. Fugly wins again, landing Lily in hot water, arrested. And Max’s mom is happy to have brought her down. But from that, Lily learns the more attention she gives Maxine, the more power she gives her. When Lily finally makes peace with Max’s mom, Lily realizes that she can keep Maxine at a distance, know she�
��s there and that there’s a hell of a lot of work to be done to fix Maxine, but that she (Max’s mom) doesn’t have to get in the way of Lily’s happiness. So Lily making peace with Maxine (shaking her hand) doesn’t mean Lily likes her, but Lily gets that she can’t change reality. Maxine is Max’s mom. Lily’s fugly voice is there. Deal with it and put it in its place, but don’t ever empower it.

  Finally, Lily has to accept that she makes mistakes. She’s never ever gonna be perfect no matter how hard she tries, but doesn’t need to beat herself up. At the end of the story, Lily is once again tested. More lies about Max are thrown at her, just like the first book. And once again, she believes them. She listens to her fugly voice and not to her heart. Won’t she ever learn? Won’t she ever be perfect and get everything right?

  Hell no.

  Yes, it would’ve made a more warm and fuzzy story if she simply hadn’t believed the press, but then we’d miss seeing something bigger and better happen. Lily knows she’s failed to achieve perfection but doesn’t tell herself she’s an idiot or a failure for her shortcomings. She simply recognizes she’s made a mistake by believing her “lovely lies” and moves on with life and with Max, her truth, her true love, and her future.

  Okay, all! I hope you enjoyed this mushy, gushy note, and I hope you enjoyed the story. And now…for something completely ridiculous. God of Wine comes next. And yes, he really thinks he’ll save the world with his super abs! Haha!

  With LOVE,

  MIMI

  PLAY LIST:

  “Can’t Pretend” by Tom Odell

  “Magnetised” by Tom Odell

  “HandClap” by Fitz and the Tantrums

  “Way Down We Go” by Kaleo

  “All We Have” by Ok Sweetheart

  “Mad World” by Gary Jules

  “Made Of Stone” by Matt Corby

  “Fake It” by Bastille

  “Packed Powder” by Blind Pilot

  “Welcome To Your Life” by Grouplove

  “Good Grief” by Bastille

  “Good Girls” by Elle King

  “Usted Me Encanta” by Intocable

  “Like Lions” by Blind Pilot

  A heartfelt thank you goes out to my readers who continue to cheer me on and share pieces of their lives. Whether it be your unicorn cookie recipes, your own stories about life, or just simply letting me know that I made you laugh when you needed it most, it’s an honor being a part of your lives.

  To the folks who help make the books better and make them happen…this was #23! I’m still wondering how many I’ll get to torture you with, but I’m hoping it will be many, many more. Thank you Kyle, Dali, Ally, Naughty Nana, Latoya, Pauline, and Paul!

  Love,

  Mimi

  Coming November 2016!

  Book #3 of the Immortal Matchmakers Inc. Series (Standalone)

  CAN ROCK-HARD ABS SAVE THE WORLD? HE SURE THINKS SO!

  Acan, the God of Wine and Intoxication, has been partying for over ten thousand years. And New Year’s Eve, when humans around the world succumb to his naturally occurring spike in powers, is his big night. Only this year, things are a bit different.

  A plague is sweeping the immortal community, and he’s turning downright evil. All those New Year’s bashes will turn into bloodbaths if he doesn’t stop it. Sadly, the only known cure is finding a mate, and he is a giant, rude, beer-bellied mess. Definitely not husband material.

  But can a little gym time and help from the pros at Immortal Matchmakers, Inc., turn him into a divine sex-machine? Absolutely!

  So watch out, ladies! The God of Wine is lookin’ for love. And he has absolutely no clue what he’s doing.

  FOR RELEASE DATE NEWS, BUY LINKS, & MORE, GO TO:

  www.mimijean.net/godofwine.html

  Book #5, the FINALE of the King Series

  FOR RELEASE DAY NEWS, BUY LINKS, & MORE, GO TO:

  www.mimijean.net/tenclub.html

  MIMI JEAN PAMFILOFF is a USA Today and New York Times bestselling romance author. Although she obtained her MBA and worked for more than fifteen years in the corporate world, she believes that it’s never too late to come out of the romance closet and follow your dream. Mimi lives with her Latin lover hubby, two pirates-in-training (their boys), and the rat terrier duo, Snowflake and Mini Me, in Arizona. She hopes to make you laugh when you need it most and continues to pray daily that leather pants will make a big comeback for men.

  Sign up for Mimi’s mailing list for giveaways and new release news!

  www.mimijean.net

  twitter.com/MimiJeanRomance

  pinterest.com/mimijeanromance

  instagram.com/mimijeanpamfiloff

  facebook.com/MimiJeanPamfiloff